


Colour me blue

by thatsformetoknow



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: :pensive_cowboy:, A lot - Freeform, A whole lotta that, AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH, All the time, Kinda, M/M, Masturbation, Maybe - Freeform, Multiple Orgasms, Overstimulation, Phone Sex, Post S8, Riding, Rough Sex, SHIRO IS A FUCKING GAY DISASTER, Semi Public Sex, Size Difference, Size Kink, Threesome, also knee high boots booty shorts and a crop top, and he films porn with aliens and somehow, and somewhere along the way feelings get caught and more shit happens, and theres a lot of porn, and they hook up, and thus begins a terrible downward spiral, anyway a whole shit ton of plot appeared, ass eating, bless him, blowjob, canonverse, cockslut lance, do i need to tag the porn tags, face fuck, hERE AT LAST, hes a mess, i cant even remember what i wrote at this point, i have missed a ton of tags wow, keith is very done, lance became a pornstar post canon instead of a farmer, lance in lipstick, no shurtis, okay, pornstar lance au, shiro stumbles upon these videos, slutty lance, thanks fell, thats a whole ass kink by itself, the usual, ughhhh i have been slaving over this i love it so much, uh, you know how it is, youre fucking welcome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-28
Updated: 2019-05-05
Packaged: 2019-12-25 22:27:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 100,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18270461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thatsformetoknow/pseuds/thatsformetoknow
Summary: “Yeah, okay.” Keith smiled. “That sounds good. You’ve been in touch with Lance then? Oh, I suppose you’ve been back home since we last spoke?”Oh, Shiro had been in touch with Lance alright.Something must have shown on his face, because Keith narrowed his eyes sceptically. “What…?”“Uh, nothing.” He said, shaking his head.“Shiro.” Keith said, raising an eyebrow and folding his arms over his chest. “Don’t lie to me.”“I found Lance’s secret alien porn channel and then I fucked him and then I filmed a porn video with him and kept fucking him and now we have this weird friends with benefits thing going on and I don’t know where I stand and I don’t know if I like him like him or if it’s just friendship sex feelings and it’s absolutely killing me.” He said all at once without taking a breath.Keith blinked, looking at him for a long moment. “Is it April first where you are?”Shiro huffed a laugh at that. “I’m afraid I can’t say that it is, no.”





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ifellfromtheskies](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ifellfromtheskies/gifts).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for my lovely friend fell <3 when i said i would write you a fic i did not,,,, imagine it would get so out of hand !!!!!! but here we are !!!!!!!! i hope you enjoy it omggg <3

It had been an accident. A very well orchestrated accident by some sort of mythical deity that Shiro didn’t believe in that most definitely hated him. 

Technology got confusing once you got into space. There was Earth technology, and then there was not-Earth technology, and everything else just sort of melded into one in Shiro’s mind. 

The Atlas was doing less ‘important’ work these days. But it kept Shiro busy, and it gave him a purpose and honesty at this point in his life, anything that didn’t put him and his crew in immediate life-threatening danger was really a plus. 

Shiro didn’t know the ins and the outs of how the internet worked in space, because he was sure that Earth wifi was connected to various satellites and things surrounding the Earth, and he was sure that Pidge would be able to give him a run down if he asked her, but also he wasn’t entirely sure that his brain could handle such an overload of information.

They went through black spots, of course, for days and days at a time where they weren’t near any neighbouring planets or anything to connect to, and Shiro wasn’t about to look a gift horse in the mouth and wonder just how it was that they managed to connect the Atlas…

What that also meant, was that Earth wifi couldn’t be accessed from space, and space wifi couldn’t be accessed on Earth. Space wifi was… a broad term.

What this _also_ meant, was that while they _were_ connected somewhere, Shiro had to make a point of downloading anything he wanted for the next time that they would be cut off.

The usual; books, videos, music, porn, to list a few.

Living semi-permanently on the Atlas, in all honesty wasn’t doing wonders for Shiro’s sex life. He knew how much of a bad idea it would be getting involved with someone on the crew, not to mention there were probably rules about that somewhere…

And so between his Garrison days, getting abducted and tortured by aliens, getting rescued and re-abducted and then put in charge of saving the universe, there hadn’t exactly been much time to pursue any sexual endeavours and quite honestly, the perpetual anxiety and stress that came with saving the universe and him and his loved ones being in constant life threatening situations, hadn’t done wonders for his libido, either. Surprising, really.

Yes, maybe Shiro had jumped at the chance for the little while they’d been back home and allowed himself a moment of celebration that they’d actually- somehow- beat the Galra and won the war and gone out and gotten himself wasted and laid. It hadn’t been anything to write home about.

So now, back in space, stopping on planets here and there, but mostly stuck in space on a ship with the same crew, Shiro wasn’t exactly being presented with a great plethora of potential sexual partners.

Not to mention the whole- Captain thing. That would… probably definitely be a bad idea. 

So yes, Shiro downloaded porn onto his tablet and yes, he watched it and he jacked off most nights like the regular, twenty-something (he’d lost count somewhere along the way) year old man that he was.

It really had been an accident. A horrifying, terrible, absolutely _awful_ accident.

They’d been connected up to one of the wider networks. Shiro recognised the porn site from one he’d connected to a few weeks back, so this must have been a network that spanned, but definitely not one reachable on Earth. 

He’d gone to the most recent videos page, plan being to download maybe thirty or so that he liked the look of (because sue him, who knew when they’d next be connected, and Shiro wanted some goddamned variety in his life) and then move on to e-books.

He’d scrolled through the first few pages, watching the previews on the thumbnails and downloading a couple, clicking on a few that caught his interest, filling out slightly in his pants the longer he did this, but that wasn’t the purpose here, he was just checking that they would be good for him.

And it had been one- _one video_ out of hundreds of _thousands_ , and so maybe it had just been terribly shitty timing or some sort of absolutely fucked up fate.

He’d clicked on it, like he had the last, the preview on the thumbnail not being a good enough taster, and so Shiro skipped through the video, humming as he watched.

They were all aliens, mostly. Which- made sense, of course. This one looked like a human, though. 

That was good, some sense of normality through it all. He wasn’t paying particular attention.

The bottom- the human, male- was spread out on his knees and it started off with just a shot of his ass and his thighs as the top stretched him out, using various sized toys and gaining the prettiest, breathiest little whimpers from the bottom.

Then it was a shot of the top- a large alien, larger than the man, by far. He resembled… something of a deer, Shiro would say, judging by those antlers. Honestly, he was quite attractive, and Shiro bit his lip as he watched.

Then it was a shot of his cock. _His cock, god_. 

Shiro was used to seeing alien appendages of all shapes and sizes (he’d have to remember to download a fuck ton of porn the next time they stopped on Earth, because he couldn’t remember the last time they’d stopped there), but this was different.

This was different because yes, his alien cock was devastatingly attractive, and devastatingly big and honestly, what Shiro wouldn’t have given to go down on that. But it was different because this was with a human man. 

Shiro hadn’t seen much of the bottom yet besides his ass and god- it really was an attractive ass, and Shiro had really fucking missed appreciating the human form, and maybe fantasising about rutting his cock between those cheeks.

The point- it was a very long winded point when Shiro kept getting distracted by various body parts- was that he was used to aliens taking big cocks and that was all very well and hot, but this bottom was a human, and Shiro had only (regrettably? He wasn’t sure) slept with humans, and he was absolutely dwarfed in comparison.

The bottom’s cock was dangling between his legs, hard and leaking from the teasing, and it wasn’t a bad size, but in comparison to the alien’s it looked positively little and almost- cute?

Honestly, Shiro was maybe going to have to watch this one the whole way through, because he could now feel himself aching in his pants, and there really was no sense in denying himself, was there? It wasn’t like having an orgasm was going to do him any terrible harm.

He could just resume the choosing and downloading process when he was sated.

Having made that decision, he pulled the lock across on his bedroom door, laying back down on his bed and holding his tablet in one hand, free hand lightly palming himself through his pants, just lightly working himself up; he wanted this to last.

Shiro suppressed a groan in favour of listening to the bottom when the alien finally pressed into him, hole loose and wet and shiny, and he gasped and moaned, fingers clutching into the sheets, cock drooling a fine stream of precum onto the sheets beneath him as he stretched around the large cock.

The top went slow to begin with, because clearly it was a struggle for the bottom, even with all the prep they’d done, and it was almost agonising to watch as he slid slowly in, Shiro desperately wishing to be in his place, sinking into the hot tight heat.

He huffed a small groan, squeezing his cock a little and listening to the little mewls from the man as the alien finally bottomed out, cock seated fully inside of him.

Shiro half wished that they’d change the shot angle, that he could see more of the bottom, so he could picture it more, picture himself in the aliens place, having that man here with him and sinking his cock into him, drawing those needy little whimpers from him himself.

The shot didn’t change, however, as the top began to draw his cock back out and Shiro couldn’t draw his eyes away from how his hole was stretched so tightly around it. 

There was a punched out little gasp as he rocked back into him, a soft groan from the top, hands gripping firmly at his hips, setting a slow and gentle pace, getting him used to the stretch as he began to fuck into him.

Shiro pushed the waistband of his pants down, just enough to pull his cock out, hot and heavy in his hand and he breathed a gentle moan at the relief of finally wrapping his fingers around the aching length.

He mimicked the slow pace with his hand, squeezing tightly to try and emulate the feeling of fucking into someone, unable to draw his eyes away from the screen, listening to the desperate whimpers and gasps as the top sped up a little, picking up the pace, keeping it gentle, but pushing his cock into him a little faster.

He kept getting faster from that point on, fucking into him faster- _harder_ , and judging by how his cock was drooling and his desperate moans, the bottom wasn’t going to last very long. 

His thighs shook every few thrusts, and Shiro assumed that that was a firm hit to his prostate, followed by a desperate breathless cry. 

He was rocking back against the length, rolling his hips to meet each thrust, ass up in the air in a way that Shiro could only assume meant his face was pressed firmly into the sheets.

Shiro breathed out a soft whine, fisting over his cock quickly as he watched, regrettably feeling himself growing closer with each thrust, too. 

It wasn’t long before the man was giving a constant stream of intelligible moans and whimpers, curse words slurred between, orgasm hitting him hard, thighs shaking harshly as cum spilled from his cock in thick ribbons onto the bed beneath them, cock completely untouched and it was beautiful- Shiro almost came from it alone, listening to him, watching him, wishing that it was his cock buried deeply inside of him instead.

Soon, he was shying away from each thrust, clearly aching with oversensitivity, desperately mewling as he rocked forwards, and the alien just kept driving his cock into him, punching out each moan and it was one of the hottest things that Shiro had ever seen.

The shot changed then, clearly having taken some mercy on him, and it was of the alien, stroking a hand over his cock, standing up now and quickly fisting over it.

Then it changed again, the face of the bottom, face flushed, eyes closed and lips parted, clearly eagerly awaiting the load that he was about to receive.

Shiro had never hated himself more, spilling over his hand the moment the top spilled over the bottom’s face- _Lance’s_ face, Lance moaning eagerly as the cum hit across his face in ropes, over his cheeks and his lips, into his hungrily awaiting mouth.

Shiro didn’t think he’d ever cum so hard in his life, completely taken off guard, completely overwhelmed, panting harshly and still coming down from his high by the time he was able to give a coherent thought.

The video had ended on the screen, the replay button highlighted and Shiro blinked.

He blinked at it for a very long time, hand wrapped still around his spent cock, cum spattered over his shirt that he hadn’t thought to take off, chest heaving, brain having completely shut down.

There was… no way. There was no way. It was- a trick of his mind, it must have been. Not that that would have been a sufficient explanation for his subconscious picturing Lance in place of the random man on his screen; he had never harboured anything for him… never… thought about him like that.

Appreciated that he was incredibly attractive, perhaps, but Shiro had eyes. Anyone could do that. It wasn’t… It wasn’t… No.

He took in a deep shaky breath, biting down on his lip and hitting the replay button, momentarily becoming distracted again by Lance’s- the man’s- ass, pretty hole being stretched open once more in preparation for the massive cock he was about to take. 

Shiro quickly skipped through the video to the end.

It was Lance.

It was absolutely and undeniably Lance.

But how was it Lance?

Shiro wasn’t aware that… Lance had spent much time on any of the neighbouring planets around here, as far as he was aware, Lance lived on Earth. He’d never… asked him in particular, but he was sure it would have come up…

There’s no way Lance wouldn’t be living with his family after everything, Shiro knew how homesick he’d been.

He wouldn’t have up and left to- to make porn with aliens! There were plenty of men on Earth that Shiro knew would have happily fucked Lance. Himself, now, apparently, being one of them.

No, no, no, no. Absolutely _not_. There was no _way_ that Shiro was going down that road.

No. Shiro was a gay man, and so show him a pretty ass and a pretty hole that belonged to a nameless bottom and yeah, sure, sue him. Fucking sue him, of course he was going to want to fuck him, he was only human. He had needs. And yes, he was incredibly, incredibly sexually frustrated.

That didn’t mean that he would still fuck him now that he knew it was one of his most trusted friends.

No.

Shiro ran a stressed hand over his face, finally letting go of his cock and wiping himself clean with some tissues, pulling his shirt off and dumping it on the floor next to his bed, clicking off of the video and onto the profile.

_Hi! The name’s Blue, but you can just call me yours ;)_

Well. If that wasn’t an incredibly _Lance_ thing to say then Shiro didn’t know what was. Blue. He couldn’t have been _more_ obvious, could he?

_Current resident of Earth, but I like to get out some, explore the universe and all that shit, you know? Tried that once, didn’t work out too great, lol. Figured this time it might work better, and hey, if I can find some hot aliens to fuck me then that’s just a bonus ;)_

Shiro… didn’t know what to say. He really didn’t. He didn’t know what to think. He couldn’t even fully _comprehend_ this.

He hadn’t even- known that Lance was bi (was he?), let alone- this. 

A pornstar. Lance was a pornstar.

Lance McClain. _Lance McClain_.

Not that Shiro thought that Lance didn’t have it, because clearly- judging by his cum stained shirt, he very much _did_. Just that… Well, this was _Lance_.

Lance. Lance who tried to hook up with aliens and got tied to space trees, not Lance that tried to hook up with aliens, got plowed into the mattress and made some money off of it, too.

Lance that made his Monsters and Mana character a ninja cat thief and pouted when his plans went wrong. Lance that was always cracking jokes and diffusing the situation and was somehow one of the most mature and completely _immature_ people that Shiro had ever met. 

Not Lance that took one of the biggest cocks Shiro had ever seen like an absolute fucking champ. No, that Lance didn’t exist in Shiro’s mind, but clearly that Lance existed in real life and Shiro didn’t know how to deal with that.

He scrolled through the videos, and no, he was not going to watch them. He just… he needed to know. He needed to make sure, he needed- to see Lance again, face blissed out in pleasure, hole stretched tightly around a cock, needy desperate whimpers and moans as he was used and fucked and god- this was not how Shiro had expected to spend his evening.

There were quite a few videos on there, and if Shiro accidentally hit the download button then that was his business. He wasn’t going to watch them.

He wasn’t.

 

***

 

It was two nights later that Shiro found himself with his hand inside his pants, desperately jerking himself off as he watched Lance’s lips stretched around a cock, a different type of alien this time.

The length wasn’t as big as before, not by a long shot. Still a lot bigger than an average human sized cock, but not _monstrous_. Big though, still big, and Lance was taking it into the back of his throat like he was made for it, moaning around him and looking up at the camera with the sexiest most cock-sure look that Shiro had ever seen.

He liked cocky Lance, he’d always liked cocky Lance, but now he was liking him for all the wrong reasons, and he was thinking back to all of those self assured smirks that Lance would have given and instead of being urged to roll his eyes and huff a laugh, he was being urged to push Lance to his knees and wipe that look off of his face by stuffing his mouth full of his cock.

He’d lasted a day- a whole day- two, pretty much, if you considered how late it was. Two days of thinking about Lance’s blissed out face and not doing anything, and Shiro had absolutely gone to bed last night with some of the bluest balls he’d ever had but he’d out rightly _refused_ to give in.

He’d opened the page again this evening, though, because really, he needed to finish downloading things before they moved off the network again, and one look at the video thumbnail of Lance with those pretty lips around a cock and Shiro was gone.

He was about half way through the video now, he hadn’t even bothered to take his cock out of his pants, just shoved his hand down them like a horny teenager, desperately jerking himself off as he watched Lance. 

It was first person point of view, and it was killing him, absolutely _killing him_ , Lance looking up at him with those eyes- god those eyes, and it wasn’t fair, it wasn’t fair, it wasn’t fair.

It didn’t take Shiro long to cum, staining the front of his pants and he gave a frustrated groan, closing Lance’s page and having to restrain himself from throwing his tablet across the room.

This wasn’t right and it wasn’t fair on Lance, let alone himself. He didn’t know how he’d feel if he posted porn and one of his closest friends was desperately jerking off to it, thinking about it all day. 

He shuddered, frowning. That was… really shitty of him, actually. Hell, Lance was probably posting all the way out here so that it was untraceable back to Earth, and here Shiro was, cum stained pants (and shirt), thinking about Lance’s mouth and his ass and god, that was so fucking shallow of him.

He’d never thought about Lance like that until now, and now he was all he could think about. He’d barely spoken to him in months and it wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fucking fair.

Shiro was being a fucking creep and he needed to get over himself. He sighed, putting his tablet down and getting into the shower, turning the heat up until it hurt and he had to turn it back down, the steam clearing his head a little, and he flopped back down onto his bed when he was finished, picking his tablet back up.

Shiro just needed to get laid. He was too sex starved and too sexually frustrated that he’d latched onto Lance because he _knew_ Lance, and that made him somehow attainable in his mind. 

Lance wasn’t.

Not that Lance would be interested in him, clearly by the multitude of aliens he was sleeping with. There wasn’t a single video of himself with another human.

He closed the porn site all together, moving to look for a few books to download and then music.

There was an uneasy feeling in his stomach as he went to sleep that night. He felt bad… but… at the same time, was it _really_ so different from regular porn?

It wasn’t as though Shiro was being… a voyeur. Lance had posted those videos publicly on the internet. He’d filmed them with the knowledge that people would watch- and jerk off to them. 

Just because… Shiro _knew_ Lance… did that make it so different?

Shiro really needed to get back to Earth to download some regular porn. Or get laid. Maybe both. Definitely both.

 

***

 

By the time Shiro saw Lance again he’d watched _all_ of his videos. At least twice over. So much that he had _favourites_.

It was just porn, right? It was in the public domain, there was nothing wrong with it.

Except there was everything wrong with it and Shiro didn’t quite know how to face that. So he just… didn’t. He told himself it was okay and he kept watching Lance’s videos and everything was fine.

Except then they made a trip back to Earth. Shiro hadn’t even considered that he might see Lance, why would he? Lance didn’t live near the Garrison, Lance had no reason to be there…

Except he absolutely did, because his sister was part of the Atlas crew, and she’d been away for _months_ , which meant that he was there to greet her back.

Shiro nearly choked when he saw him, but other than that, he was actually quite proud of himself for remaining so carefully put together.

It was only a brief wave and a smile at first, Lance far too caught up in saying hello to Veronica, and Shiro being a little distance away, and they didn’t get a moment to themselves until later that evening.

Shiro had joined everyone in the Garrison common rooms, trying to avoid Lance as best he could, because as much as he had spent the last few weeks justifying his every move… Actually seeing him in person… Was flooding him with the most terrible guilt.

Jacking off nightly to one of your closest friend’s porn videos wasn’t something to take lightly, and just have a chat over tea when you saw them a few weeks later. 

It just wasn’t something Shiro could stomach. Not when he’d seen… Well, he’d seen more of Lance than he’d ever thought he’d see, but the fact was that he’d kept _choosing_ to see it, kept watching and watching and touching himself and thinking of him, imagining it was his cock disappearing inside of him in each of the videos instead of whoever he had picked out to fuck him senseless on that particular occasion.

No, that wasn’t something you did and then asked your friend how their life was going, when you knew very well how their life was going, and that it involved getting dicked down by hot buff aliens, incredibly regularly.

So Shiro had managed to escape with a red face and a few swift words, retiring early back to the Atlas, which was now stationed at the Garrison, and would be there for a few days, at the very least.

He somehow didn’t expect Lance when he heard the knock at his door, running a hand through his hair, having now changed out of his uniform and into some sweats, opening the door, eyes widening.

“Hi- uh, hi, Lance.” He said with a smile, swallowing.

“Hey Shiro.” Lance said with a warm smile, a fondness in his eyes that Shiro really didn’t deserve. “I thought I’d come say hi, I barely caught you today. It’s been so long.”

“Yeah- yeah, no, of course. Come in.” Shiro said before he could come up with an excuse, unable to say no to Lance when he sounded so sincere and caring and of course- Lance was one of his ‘most trusted friends’, as he kept calling him. Of course he cared. Of course he wanted to catch up.

It didn’t make sense for this to be such a big deal. Everyone had sex. Most people had sex, and most people had a lot of sex. Just because Lance chose to put that experience online for others to see and jack off to, and that Shiro had accidentally ended up being one of those people, didn’t _mean_ anything.

Everyone had sex. He had sex, Keith had sex, Hunk had sex- okay, stopping that train of thought because Shiro really really did not want to think of either Keith or Hunk having sex and especially not anyone else close to him.

So he supposed there was a slight difference.

Because balking at the thought of some of your friends having sex, and furiously jacking off to the thought of another were two vastly different things.

If he’d- god fucking forbid- stumbled upon one of his other friends porn videos, Shiro thought that he probably would have thrown his tablet against the wall and would have been emotionally traumatised for the rest of his life.

Not desperately wanting to shove them full of his cock like he wanted to Lance.

And now Lance was sitting on his bed.

On the very bed that Shiro had cum moaning his name absolutely countless times.

This was very very not good. It was as if Lance could somehow _know_.

“So how’ve you been?” He asked with a smile and Shiro blinked at him, realising that he was being spoken to.

“Oh, yeah, good. I’ve been good. Things have been good here. How, um, how about you?”

Lance hummed and nodded. “That’s good. I’ve been good too, really good. I’ve been sort of, hopping around here and there, stopping on various planets. I figured I’m due some sort of space exploration.” He said with a laugh and Shiro laughed with him.

“Yeah, I think we all are. That’s good, though, I mean, that’s what we all set out to do when we joined the Garrison, isn’t it? Just to get out there and explore?”

Lance smiled fondly and nodded. “Yeah, I’m glad there’s less death risks now.”

Shiro laughed. “You can definitely say that again.” 

Lance shook his head as he laughed, biting down on his lip and Shiro tracked the movement with his eyes- how many times had he watched those lips stretched around a cock?

“I’ve missed you.” Lance said softly after a few moments, brows pinched together in a small frown. “I’ve missed everyone, really.”

Shiro sighed and nodded. “Yeah, well, I guess being stuck in space with the same people for god knows how long will do that to you.”

“Mmm. I’m glad I got to see you, though.” He smiled. “I don’t remember the last time Keith stopped by, have you seen him recently?”

Shiro shook his head. “No, I haven’t. We’ll all have to find a time our schedules meet up, you’re right. I’ll definitely stop by and see Hunk and Pidge while I’m stopped on Earth, at least.”

Lance hummed, nodding. “How long are you going to be here?”

“Mm, about a week, maybe? I’m not sure.” Shiro said, tilting his head.

“Oh, that’s cool.” Lance smiled. “We should grab lunch or something.”

“Yeah, definitely.” Shiro smiled, biting his lip. “That sounds good.”

“You wanna do that tomorrow, if you’re free?” Lance asked and Shiro nodded.

“Yeah, I’d like that.” He said with a smile. 

“Me too.” Lance said, smiling softly back and biting down on his lip again. Shiro wished he could say he’d collected himself enough by now to not be drawn to it. He hadn’t. 

There was a natural lull and Lance blew out a breath, standing and stretching his arms. 

“Well, I’ll let you get back to uh… whatever it is you were doing, and I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Shiro huffed a small laugh. “Okay. Have a good night, Lance.”

Lance smiled, turning as he got to the door and giving him a lopsided smile. “You too, Shiro. It was good to see you again.”

He was gone before Shiro could say anything else and Shiro stood staring at the doorway for a lot longer than he would have liked. He got up, closing the door and giving a long sigh, flopping down onto his bed face first and groaning into his pillow.

He was fucked. That was the only explanation. He was absolutely and utterly fucked. 

Because Lance was _beautiful_. Shiro knew that, Shiro had always known that.

Lance had been beautiful then and he was beautiful now. He’d been beautiful back on the Castle of Lions, whether it be training or fighting, or lounging against Hunk sleepily in the evenings.

He was beautiful still, beautiful differently, a sheen of sweat on his skin, ragged gasps punched from him as he was played with in whatever way he could possibly be.

And he was beautiful now, had been beautiful standing in his doorway with his hair a little mussed from the day, tired wonky smile filled with affection.

And Shiro was fucked.

He’d have considered lunch tomorrow as a date if he hadn’t done it many times with all of them already. He wasn’t going to fool himself into thinking that this was something it wasn’t. It wasn’t a date. 

They got lunch to catch up when they met up, they all did, with whoever it was they were meeting up with, that’s just the way it was.

If Shiro felt a little disappointed at that, then… That wasn’t for him to dwell on.

It wasn’t fair to Lance that he’d developed such a sudden infatuation all because all he knew how to do these days was think with his cock. 

It was hardly fair to have known him so many years and just thought of him as a friend and suddenly be so incredibly attracted to him now, suddenly want him so badly.

And yet, here he was, wanting him that badly, anyway, despite how absolutely terrible it was, because Lance would never want _him_.

It took Shiro a while to fall asleep that night, and he refused to touch himself, no matter how much he wanted to, no matter how long he spent debating the ethics of it, which of course, led to thinking about Lance’s videos in vivid detail, which lead to a very hard cock in his pants.

He didn’t, though. 

 

***

 

He did it in the morning instead. He managed to hold off until he was in the shower, but at this point, he’d already done it so much, what was one more? Just because he was getting lunch with him later? Didn’t mean he couldn’t think about burying his cock inside of him until he came all over himself.

Shiro sighed. When had he become so sex obsessed? He really, _really_ needed to get laid.

He spent a little longer than usual getting ready, but he didn’t dwell on that for too long, making sure he was ready by the time Lance came knocking.

He was all bright smiles this afternoon, hair neatly brushed, as opposed to the semi-curled mess it had been yesterday, and he looked much more awake.

He’d chatted all the way to the cafe, hanging off of Shiro’s arm and Shiro wouldn’t have been able to not listen to him if he had tried, he was completely entranced.

And god, had Shiro missed him. Missed _him_ him, the Lance that he knew. Not pornstar Lance, not fantasy Lance, just _Lance_.

Shiro couldn’t for the life of him remember what they’d talked about over lunch, only the sound of Lance’s laugh and that he got some mayonnaise on his chin and blushed furiously as Shiro had reached over the table with his napkin to wipe it away.

They’d wandered aimlessly after that, Lance still hanging off of his arm, just enjoying the fresh air and sunshine while they still could. 

They’d gone back to Shiro’s room after that. They’d just sort of ended up there, it hadn’t been a specific plan, and Lance had offered to leave, and Shiro had asked him to stay. 

Honestly, this was feeling more and more like a date, and more and more like a successful one, at that.

And then Shiro had to go and fuck it up.

Oh, there was one thing that Shiro was not supposed to do, there was _one goddamned thing_ that Shiro was _not_ supposed to do, and that was _tell_ Lance.

He’d blurted it out and he’d never wanted to take something back more, god, he couldn’t even do _one thing_ right.

“Oh, you know, I just sort of flit around.” Lance had said with a shrug and an airy laugh. “Just doing the odd thing here and there for money, helping people out, you know?”

“You’re a pornstar.” He said. Said it before he could even think to stop the words, and he’d had to hear them in the air before he’d even realised that that was what his brain had provided him with.

Lance’s eyes widened and he opened his mouth and closed it again, cheeks a brilliant red.

“I, um- fuck.” Shiro said, stumbling over himself, sure he was flushed as deeply as Lance was.

“Oh.” Lance said, biting his lip, brows pinching into a frown. “How did you know about that?” He looked scared, almost, as if Shiro was going to look down on him and judge him.

Ha, the only way Shiro wanted to look down on him, is if Lance was between his legs and sucking his cock.

“I uh… I found your um, videos.” He said. 

“Right.” Lance said softly, not making eye contact with him. “You’ve seen…?”

“All of them.” Shiro said and really, that- _that_ was the moment. Out of all of this, since this whole thing started, _that was the moment_.

Lance’s eyes widened again. “I- um- what?”

“Shit.” Shiro cursed under his breath.

There really was no way he was getting out of this one.

“I- um- I-” He said, not knowing what on Earth- what in the _universe_ he could possibly say to make this better.

Except then Lance’s lip curled into a smirk.

“If you’ve seen _all of them_... then that means you liked what you saw, right…?”

Shiro blinked, looking at him. “Um.” There was no way he could defend himself. No way he’d even _want_ to. Not with Lance looking at him like that. He had always liked cocky Lance, after all.

Lance’s smirk grew and he tilted his head. “Oh, _Shiro_.” He said, voice soft and breathy and Shiro swallowed thickly.

Shiro glanced at him, cheeks absolutely burning, feeling like they were positively on _fire_ with how sure of himself Lance looked, how affectionately he was looking at Shiro. Like he thought he was cute and he was pitying him in the most sarcastic mocking way all at once.

“Tell me if I overstep.” Lance murmured, looking at him searchingly for a few moments, before single handedly causing Shiro’s death right there and then.

He slipped off of the bed, sinking to his knees in front of Shiro and looking up at him. Looking up at him with that _look_ that Shiro had seen so many times through the screen, but this time it was _his_. This look was just for _him_.

Shiro wet his lip, looking down at him, already feeling like he couldn’t breathe.

“Will you let me, Shiro?” He asked, voice a silky murmur and god, how had _any_ of those aliens from before ever had it in them to turn Lance down?

How had any of them ever turned _this_ down? 

“Let- let you what?” He asked, clearing his throat, voice already breaking a little. He needed to hear it, _needed_ to hear him say it. 

Lance gave a small laugh at that, dragging his teeth over his bottom lip and looking back up at him through long lashes.

“Will you let me suck your cock, Shiro?” He asked, each word defined and pronounced and Shiro had to stop himself from groaning.

It was all Shiro could manage to give a small shaky nod, never taking his eyes off of Lance as he smoothed his hands over Shiro’s thighs, pushing them apart and Shiro gave a sharp intake at that.

Lance smirked up at him. He knew damn well what he was doing. 

“Did you like that one?” Lance asked, biting his lip. “The video.”

Shiro swallowed thickly. “I’ve uh- watched that one a lot.” 

Lance’s lip curled. “Yeah?” He asked, tilting his head and Shiro nodded. “Mmm, that’s good to know.”

Shiro’s breath hitched as Lance ran his fingertips along the insides of his thighs, feeling too hot in his clothes, but Lance took his time, finally going for his belt and unbuckling it, slipping it out of the loops and depositing it on the floor next to him.

Lance hummed, fingertips brushing over his growing bulge, just enough to tease and not enough to properly feel anything. He spent a few moments delicately palming him, gripping his erection lightly and gently teasing it with his fingers, drawing a small breathy whine from Shiro.

“Lance.” He breathed, and Lance flicked his eyes up to Shiro’s, fingers stilling and he tilted his head. 

He looked at him for a long moment, not breaking eye contact as his fingers moved to his button, undoing it and pulling down his zipper, opening his trousers the best he could.

He tugged, and Shiro took the hint, lifting his hips enough for Lance to pull them down so that they gathered around his ankles.

Lance hummed softly, teasing his fingers over Shiro’s cock through his underwear, already embarrassingly hard, and having to swallow down his noises; Lance had barely done anything yet.

Lance looked up at him, lips curling back into that smirk, that fucking _smirk_ , before leaning in, nuzzling against Shiro’s erection, breath hot on the fabric of his underwear, lips parting in a wet kiss over the fabric.

Shiro did moan at that. Small and breathy, only barely there, but enough that Lance gave a small amused noise against him, dragging his lips over his cock, laving his tongue over it, dampening the fabric until it clung to him and Shiro was holding in the tiniest of breathless whimpers.

Lance spent what felt like forever working him up like that, flicking his eyes up to Shiro’s every so often, either to tease him or to take a look at his handy work, Shiro wasn’t sure, but he suspected it was a little of both.

He knew just how much he was stroking Lance’s ego with the desperate little noises escaping him, when Lance hadn’t even got his pants off yet. He could tell in the amused little huffs of air and the curl of his lips, the amusement dancing in his eyes as he looked up at him.

“ _Lance_.” It was too desperate, too breathless and strained as Lance sucked and Lance hummed softly.

Lance looked up at him, finally taking pity and pulling the waistband of his underwear down, Shiro eagerly lifting his hips to make sure he was rid of them, only satisfied when they were also around his ankles.

Lance bit his lip, a soft moan spilling from his lips as he finally laid eyes on Shiro’s cock and Shiro swallowed thickly.

“Don’t look at it like that, I know for a _fact_ you’ve had a lot bigger.” He said, voice already rough and low.

Shiro was a nice size, well above average for a human, he wasn’t disputing that, but Shiro would never get the image out of his head of how Lance looked stretched around some of those alien cocks. Twice the size of a humans, at least and maybe then some. He’d taken them so well, he’d taken them _incredibly_.

“They’re not _you_.” Lance murmured, pressing a light kiss to Shiro’s bobbing cock, flushed and red.

Shiro groaned. Lance didn’t have any right sounding as hot as that saying that, he didn’t have any right to say something like that that would completely and utterly take Shiro to pieces, either. He didn’t have any right to be so devastatingly sexy, he really, really didn’t. 

Shiro’s cock jumped at the kiss and Lance gave a small laugh.

“You’re so pretty and eager.” He murmured, looking up at him again as he pressed his lips to the tip, watching as Shiro took in a sharp breath, biting his lip.

Shiro didn’t trust himself to speak, let alone open his mouth, fearful of what embarrassing noise he’d make and Lance had barely touched him, barely got his lips on him and Shiro really needed to get a grip on himself, or this experience was going to be a lot shorter than he would like, and he was going to regret it forever.

Lance hummed softly, wrapping his fingers delicately around the base of his cock, holding it in place as he parted his lips, tongue darting out to flick teasingly through his slit and Shiro gasped.

Lance smiled, swirling his tongue around the head before wrapping his lips around it, not doing anything for a few moments, just sitting there with the tip of his cock between his lips, looking up at him.

Shiro was wrecked, god, he was wrecked, he wasn’t going to survive this. 

He groaned softly, bringing a hand to gently lace through Lance’s hair, not tugging, not gripping, not yet, just lacing, stroking encouragingly.

Lance’s eyes fluttered closed and he leaned into the touch, giving a quick harsh suck that had Shiro giving a surprised ragged moan, before Lance was smirking and sinking down.

Slowly, so slowly, tantalisingly and torturously slowly as he sank down onto his length, inch by inch, never breaking eye contact with him. Shiro knew he could take it, he’d seen him take it so many times over, seen him take cocks bigger than his own deep into his throat until he should have been gagging, seen cocks bigger than his own fuck his mouth like it was nothing more than a hole to be fucked, like Lance had been _made_ for that very purpose, and Shiro was suddenly doubting that he wasn’t.

He _knew_. And yet, seeing it- _feeling it_ , feeling Lance take him in completely, feeling his cock slip down into his throat, feeling it convulse around him as Lance swallowed, was different. 

Shiro wasn’t sure how he hadn’t died yet, but when he inevitably did, he would be eternally grateful that he was blessed with such a glorious death.

Shiro could have sobbed when Lance moaned around him, swallowing around his length and looking up at him through his lashes. 

Shiro liked to think that he’d worked his stamina back up. He liked to think that from the very dry few years he’d had with minimal interest in touching himself, that with all of the furious jacking off to thoughts of Lance he’d been doing nightly, that he would have worked his stamina back up.

But a video and his right hand was absolutely nothing similar to the wet heat of Lance’s mouth, and he’d only just taken him in, but Shiro was already seriously doubting how long this was going to last for.

Lance hummed, pulling up and off of him, a string of saliva connecting the tip of Shiro’s cock to Lance’s shiny lips and Lance gave a small breathy sigh, running his tongue over his bottom lip, fingers wrapped loosely around the base of his cock.

“You okay up there?” He asked as he pressed small feathery kisses to the tip of his cock and Shiro swallowed, nodding.

“Y-yeah.” He murmured, barely able to get the words out.

Lance looked up at him, amused, just resting his cock against his lips. 

“How long’s it been since you’ve been with someone?” 

“I- uh-” Shiro said, trying to collect his thoughts and shift them away from Lance’s lips at his cock. “A while.”

Lance rolled his eyes with an amused smile, shaking his head.

Shiro huffed. “Since I left for Kerberos I’ve had sex once.” He admitted and Lance cooed.

“Oh you poor thing.” He murmured, gently stroking his hand over Shiro’s cock. “Don’t worry, I’ll take care of you, baby.” He murmured, pressing wet, almost loving kisses down the side of his shaft and at this point Shiro wasn’t entirely sure as to whether Lance was talking to him or his cock.

He wasn’t sure which was more attractive, either.

Shiro gave a soft breathy groan as Lance reached the base of his cock, fingers stroking over his length as Lance sucked one of his balls into his mouth, moaning around him, like he’d been waiting his whole life for this moment and Shiro was utterly falling to pieces.

“Lance…” He moaned breathlessly and Lance flicked his eyes up to Shiro’s, giving him a wink, before releasing the skin with a pop and licking a stripe back up to his tip, teasingly flicking through his slit. 

Shiro whined, biting down on his lip as he watched him, and Lance hummed, wrapping his lips around his cock and moaning, sinking down part way and then bobbing his head over him, sucking as he went and teasing his tongue over his length.

“Lance, I’m- I’m really not gonna-” He groaned softly and Lance looked at him for a long moment before pulling off. 

“Can you go again?” He asked, biting his lip.

“What?”

“When you cum. Can you get it back up?” He asked, gently rubbing his thumb over the head of his cock and Shiro was really having to focus on Lance’s words, rather than the feel of that.

“I- uh- yeah. I should um- yeah.” He said. 

He assumed he could. He wasn’t in the habit of going again once he’d already cum, but in all honesty, he wasn’t sure that getting hard again was exactly going to be an issue when he had Lance at his feet like this, on his knees just for him, ‘taking care of him’. 

“Unless you don’t want…” He offered, still working his hand gently over his cock and Shiro nearly choked. “Yeah, I thought so.” He said with a self satisfied smirk, bringing his lips back to the tip. “In that case you can cum when you’re ready, just warn me first, okay?”

Shiro nodded shakily, watching intently as Lance took his cock back into his mouth, shallowly bobbing his head a few times before sinking down further, taking Shiro’s cock as far in as he could, nose nestled against his abdomen and brows crinkled in concentration, that was equal parts hot and adorable.

Shiro gasped as Lance swallowed around him, throat constricting around him. Lance groaned softly, guiding Shiro’s hand back to his hair, curling his fingers around Shiro’s and Shiro took the hint, tugging a little, Lance giving an appreciative moan in response.

He pulled up, immediately sinking back down, sucking as he went, taking him into his throat again and Shiro whimpered, tugging a little more on Lance’s hair and whining as he felt him moan around him.

He wasn’t going to last, he knew he wasn't going to last. There was no way that Lance could have such a perfect mouth- be making him feel this good, it wasn’t fair. Shiro just wanted to sit here forever with Lance on his knees in front of him, taking his cock as deeply as he could and looking like he was living for every second of it.

“Lance-” He gasped as Lance brought a hand to cup his balls, giving the gentlest of squeezes as he worked his length. “Lance, Lance, I’m-”

Lance hummed in acknowledgement and Shiro loosened his grip in his hair to allow him to pull off, despite how he wanted to grip harder and shove Lance down as far as he possibly could, bury his cock in his throat as he came down it.

No, he had to let Lance pull off, because that was the decent and considerate thing to do, and Shiro was a decent and considerate man who did other things than think with his cock. _Mostly_.

Lance looked up at him, meeting his eyes and throwing him another flirty wink, sinking back down onto his cock completely, nose buried against his abdomen, swallowing hard around him, practically milking the cum from him as Shiro came with a cry, hips stuttering, trying to push deeper into Lance’s mouth, though there was no more to push in.

Lance moaned, swallowing every last drop of Shiro’s cum, staying in that position for a few moments as Shiro came down from his high, before carefully pulling off and licking his lips.

“Lance…” Shiro breathed, absolutely wrecked.

“Mm?” Lance asked, wiping the back of his mouth with his hand and flashing Shiro a grin. 

Shiro blew out a long breath, running a hand through his hair and falling backwards onto the bed, throwing an arm across his face.

“That good, huh?” Lance asked, huffing a small laugh and Shiro groaned in response.

Yes it was that good. Lance knew it was. Lance knew how fucking amazing he was at sucking cock and that shouldn’t have turned Shiro on as much as it did, but it did. Lance knew he was hot stuff, knew he had a body to die for, and knew he could work wonders with his mouth and take Shiro to pieces.

He absolutely knew it.

“You still good?” Lance asked with a hum, fingertips gently tracing over Shiro’s inner thighs and Shiro whined softly.

Oh fuck, Lance had said he was going to have him go again. As if he wasn’t already wrecked enough, as if he hadn’t already been ruined for anyone else, Lance was going to make him cum _again_.

“Shiro…?” Lance asked, voice teasing and Shiro didn’t have to be looking at him to see the smirk.

“Yes, I’m good.” He said after a long moment and Lance hummed, kneeling up and wrapping his hand back around Shiro’s cock, quickly pumping it, despite how it had softened and Shiro keened softly into the flesh of his arm.

“Are you suuure?” He asked in a tease and Shiro groaned.

“Absolutely.” He grit out, whining softly as Lance dropped his cock. 

Lance hummed, unlacing Shiro’s shoes and taking them off, before slipping his trousers and boxers off, and leaving them on the floor. 

He took his own shoes off, before getting up and clambering into Shiro’s lap, raking his nails over Shiro’s chest and moving to unbutton it, quickly undoing them and pulling it off of his shoulders, throwing it down with the rest of his clothes. 

Shiro whined unhappily, hands roaming over Lance’s chest, untucking his shirt from his pants and making quick work of tugging it up and over his head, tossing it aside, quickly.

Lance bit his lip and grinned as Shiro raked his eyes over his chest, biting his lip, hands moving to his hips and settling comfortably there.

“What do you want, baby?” Lance asked silkily and Shiro could have died at the way the endearment sounded on his lips.

“I-” He said, brows furrowing, sliding his hands over Lance’s waist and over his back, pulling him down on top of him. “Wanna kiss you.” He murmured, cupping the back of Lance’s head and pulling him gently so that they were nose to nose.

“You’re sweet.” Lance murmured, leaning in to press their lips together, before pulling away. Shiro chased his lips and Lance’s curled into a smirk, teasing him for a few more moments before pressing their lips together again, a little more firmly this time.

Shiro sighed softly against Lance’s lips, and Lance hummed, taking Shiro’s bottom lip between his teeth and dragging it slightly. Shiro gasped, and Lance gave a small giggle, slipping his tongue into his mouth, sliding it over his with a soft moan.

Lance hummed, pulling back and nipping at his lip. “Mm, are you sure that’s _all_ you want?”

“I- I didn’t say that…” Shiro murmured, and Lance’s lips curled into a smile, pecking his lips again.

“Mmmmhm?” Lance asked, pressing kisses down his jaw, wet and open mouthed, before trailing down his neck and Shiro gasped, tilting his head to the side.

“M-Mmhm.” Shiro agreed, gripping Lance’s hips as Lance sucked at the juncture of his neck, grazing his teeth over the skin.

“So what do you want then, big guy?” He asked against his skin with a hum, slightly moving his ass over Shiro’s lap. “You wanna put that pretty cock of yours inside me?”

Shiro’s breath caught in his throat and he swallowed thickly. “Uh huh.” 

“Uh huh?” Lance teased, trailing his hands down Shiro’s chest, brushing his thumbs over his nipples and gently pinching them between his fingertips as they pebbled under his touch. 

Shiro groaned softly, watching as Lance shuffled down, kissing from his collar bones down his chest, pressing a feather light kiss to one of his nipples and glancing up at him.

“Tell me you want me.” He murmured, tongue flicking out teasingly across the bud and Shiro gasped.

“I want you.” He breathed, swallowing. “Want you so badly, wanted you since I first saw the videos.”

Lance hummed softly, smiling, and flicking his tongue out again. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.” Shiro agreed, already a little breathless. “Thought about you all the time, couldn’t help it, I felt so bad.” He moaned as Lance wrapped his lips around the bud and sucked gently, rolling his other between his fingers.

“Mmmhm?” Lance asked, encouraging him to keep talking, snaking his other hand down to lightly palm at Shiro’s cock.

“Fuck, I felt so bad, Lance, I couldn’t stop thinking about it, couldn’t stop thinking about you- the way you looked, the way you sounded, wanted you so fucking badly…”

Lance moaned softly, looking up at him and squeezing gently at Shiro’s cock which was already perking up a little.

“That why I barely saw you yesterday?” He asked, pulling back and Shiro nodded.

“Y-yeah. I felt bad.” Shiro said, biting his lip.

“Mm, you don’t have to feel bad anymore though, do you, baby?” Lance murmured, gently tugging at his nipples and Shiro moaned, shaking his head.

He brought his hands to Lance’s waistband, unbuttoning his pants and trying to unsuccessfully pull them down, whining unhappily when he couldn’t, and Lance gave a small giggle.

“D’you want to watch me?” He asked, biting his lip as he got out of Shiro’s lap, pulling his pants down, followed by his underwear and Shiro swallowed at the sight of his hard cock.

“Watch you?”

“Prep.” Lance said, tilting his head and laying back on the bed, head resting against Shiro’s pillow’s as though he belonged there, teasingly spreading his legs. 

“Oh.” Shiro said, eyes trained on his thighs as they parted and he wet his lip, mouth suddenly feeling incredibly dry.

“You have some lube around here?” Lance asked and Shiro nodded, scrambling to open his bedside drawer and handing him the bottle.

Lance took it from him, uncapping it and squeezing a little onto his fingers, humming and spreading his legs further, teasing them around his entrance.

“You okay there?” Lance asked with a smirk and Shiro flicked his eyes to Lance’s, and then back to his fingers.

“Uh huh.” Shiro nodded, biting his lip, suppressing a small groan as Lance sank two fingers into himself, giving a small breathy gasp.

Shiro couldn’t take his eyes off of him, hadn’t comprehended just how different seeing everything he’d watched in person would be, seeing _Lance_.

Knowing that each little delicate sound was for him, each quirk of his lip or bat of his lashes, each longing lustful stare. It was all for him. Not for a camera, not for someone else, not to please a nameless face on the other end of the screen. _Him_.

Shiro didn’t know whether to watch Lance or kiss him. He wanted his hands all over him, but he didn’t want to miss a second of it. 

He watched as Lance tipped his head back with a breathy groan, slipping a third finger into himself and Shiro could tell when he teased his prostate from how Lance would gasp and bite down on his lip, brows pinching. 

He was stunning. He was absolutely breathtakingly stunning and Shiro wanted to watch him for the rest of eternity. 

“Shiro…” Lance gasped softly, free hand splayed on his hip, like he was half tempted to wrap his fingers around his cock, but was trying to restrain himself.

Shiro groaned, biting down on his lip hard at the way his name sounded on Lance’s lips in such a breathy moan. He wanted to keep making Lance moan like that for the rest of his life.

Shiro swallowed thickly, throat incredibly dry, cock back and fully hard and really, he reasoned with himself, how could it not be? How would anyone not be with such an angel in front of them all splayed and moaning, stretching himself out like that for Shiro’s cock?

“Lance,” he breathed, a soft needy whisper, desperate to be inside of him and Lance grinned at him.

“Tell me.” Lance breathed back, keeping eye contact with him as Shiro flicked his gaze from his movements to his eyes.

“I want you.” Shiro said in a small whine. “I want you so badly. More than I’ve ever wanted anything.”

Lance blew out a breathless laugh. “That’s high praise.” He said, gasping as he hit against his prostate and thrust his fingers into himself a few more times, before pulling them out, spreading his legs wider, letting one foot dangle off of the side of the bed.

“It’s the truth.” Shiro said with a shrug, pleased with his ability to form a coherent thought, let alone sentence as he raked his eyes over Lance’s body.

“I don’t suppose you have a condom lying around here somewhere?” Lance asked and Shiro’s heart dropped.

“Uh-” He said, wetting his lip. Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. He didn’t think he’d need one out in space! Who was he going to be having sex with?!

“Calm down.” Lance snorted. “As long as you’re clean then we don’t need one because I am, too. It’s just less messy.”

Shiro gave a small sigh and he hoped he didn’t look _quite_ as relieved as he felt. “I am.”

“Get over here and fuck me then, big guy.” Lance said with a grin.

Shiro swallowed, frozen in place for a few moments, before moving towards him, positioning himself between Lance’s spread legs.

“How do you, um…” Shiro said, brows furrowing as he tried to figure out the most comfortable way to do this.

Lance hummed. “Sit down.” He instructed.

“Uh.” Shiro said, brain slowing right down for a few moments as he thought about that.

Shiro did as he was told, sitting down next to him, biting his lip as Lance got up and clambered into his lap and Lance leant in to peck his lips, nipping at his bottom lip.

“You want me?” He asked with a teasing smile. 

“Yes.”

“You mean it? You want me on that pretty cock of yours?”

“More than anything.” Shiro breathed and Lance bit his lip, humming softly as he knelt up, taking Shiro’s cock in hand and positioning it at his entrance, slowly sinking down onto him.

Yeah, it had really been too long since Shiro had had sex, and thankfully, the fear that he was going to cum near immediately, was probably doing wonders for staving off his orgasm. He’d never be able to live that down. 

They both groaned softly, Shiro’s fingers digging into his hips a little as Lance began to slowly raise himself up and sink back down onto his cock rocking his hips and quickly picking up the pace.

“Don’t be so impatient.” Shiro murmured, voice weak and low. He wouldn’t last if Lance kept up like that, but thankfully he took some pity on him and slowed right down to a teasing pace.

“Can’t help it…” Lance whined. “You feel so good… waited so long for this…”

“Oh?” Shiro asked, not sure that he could handle much more of this.

“I- thought about you a lot… back in Voltron… wanted you.”

“Fuck. You did?” Shiro asked, gasping softly, hips stuttering.

“Uh huh. Always fancied you, I mean- look at you… you’re like a fucking god… you’re so fucking gorgeous, can you blame me?”

Shiro whined, rocking his hips up against Lance’s.

“Fuck, Lance.” He groaned. “Fuck, that’s- fuck.”

Lance moaned a small laugh, rolling his hips a little against him. “You got there eventually though, huh? Thinking about me too?”

“Thought about you every night, Lance.” Shiro admitted, groaning weakly. “You looked so fucking gorgeous like that, in all of them, every way. Just wanted to be there with you, wished it was me inside you.”

Lance whined, rocking his hips. “Fuck…” He panted softly.

He gripped onto Shiro’s shoulders to steady himself, slowly raising himself up and dropping back down, slowly picking up the pace as he went.

“Shiro, Shiro…” Lance whimpered, giving a drawn out whine and rocking on his cock.

“Have a little patience, Lance.” Shiro murmured, surprised at the steadiness of his voice, slowing down his own thrusts a little.

“Don’t wanna... “ Lance complained and Shiro scoffed.

“You’d think that you’d taken enough cock by now to have earned some patience.”

“You calling me a slut, Shiro?” Lance asked and Shiro huffed a laugh, snapping his hips and smirking at Lance’s punched out gasp.

“Absolutely.” He confirmed, pulling Lance down over his cock and Lance gasped.

“Shiro, Shiro, Shiro, there, there…” He moaned as Shiro shifted his hips a little, knocking his cock into his prostate as he thrust up into him.

Shiro’s brows pinched in concentration as he tried to replicate the movement, Lance’s back arching a little as he cried out again, tipping his head back and whining.

“Yes, yes, yes…” He panted.

Shiro moaned as Lance clenched around him, making an effort to aim for that spot with each of his thrusts, turning Lance into a moaning mess in his lap.

Shiro knew he wasn’t going to be able to carry on like this for long, Lance so deliciously wrapped around his cock, moaning so prettily for him, a sheen of sweat glimmering on his skin.

“Lance, Lance, I’m not…” Shiro groaned. “I’m not gonna last like this…” 

“S okay.” Lance panted, clenching around him and rocking back over his cock faster. “Cum for me, baby, I want it so bad, want you to fill me up, please…”

“Fuck.” Shiro groaned. How was he supposed to try and hold on when Lance asked him like that?

He groaned heavily, thrusting into him deeply, only able to hold out for a few more thrusts before his hips were stuttering into him, grinding his cock into him as he came, spilling into Lance, holding Lance firmly against him, fingertips digging into his hips.

Lance moaned as Shiro came, whining breathlessly, rocking his hips a few more times before slipping his cock out of him, giving a small whimper at the loss.

“Lance…” Shiro moaned softly, only minimally embarrassed at how wrecked he sounded.

Lance grinned lazily at him, cock red and flushed against his stomach, precum beaded at his tip.

“Hey there.” He said, voice a little raspy.

“Hey.” Shiro said softly back. “Are you, um- what can I-?”

“Oh, um, just-” He said, sounding a little wrecked himself, bringing one of Shiro’s hands to his cock and Shiro was quick to wrap his fingers around his shaft, hot to the touch and incredibly hard.

Lance moaned, biting his lip and rocking his hips a little, pushing his cock into Shiro’s hand.

“Don’t worry, I’ve got you.” Shiro murmured as he began to jerk him off, spreading precum down his shaft as he worked him, other hand resting on the small of Lance’s back, holding him close.

“Shiro, Shiro…” Lance whined and Shiro worked him a little faster, rubbing his thumb through his slit and watching as Lance’s body jerked and he cried out. “Close-”

“You’re so beautiful like this, Lance.” Shiro murmured, keeping up the quick pace. “So gorgeous, so pretty for me.”

Lance whimpered, giving a long moan as he came, back arching, head tipping back and spilling over Shiro’s hand.

“Fuck…” He whined softly, brows pinched and biting down on his lip, panting as he came down from his high, pressing his face into Shiro’s neck with a small whine.

Shiro blew out a long breath, holding Lance against him, for a few moments while Lance got his breath back, before Lance carefully extracted himself from Shiro’s arms.

Shiro frowned softly at the loss of Lance’s warmth, biting his lip and glancing at Lance who brought his legs up to his chest.

“Sorry.” He said softly. “I don’t do cuddling.”

“Oh, okay.” Shiro said, nodding. 

That was surprising, to say the least, but he supposed it was fair. Shiro presumed that Lance didn’t know a lot of the aliens that he had sex with, and Shiro… well, Lance and Shiro were good friends, but that was all.

Shiro wasn’t disappointed. Really.

“Can I use your shower?” Lance asked after a few moments.

“Uh, yeah.” He nodded, gesturing to the joining door and Lance got up, not gathering up his clothes and heading into the bathroom. 

Shiro watched him leave, blowing out a breath and biting his lip. 

When Shiro heard the shower start, he got up off of the bed, pulling on his boxers out of habit, feeling uncomfortable being naked as he moved around the room. He gathered up Lance’s clothes, folding them and putting them on the chair, gathering up his own and putting them in his laundry basket, before stripping down the bed and putting new sheets on it.

He sighed, sitting down on the edge of the bed and waiting for Lance to come out of the bathroom.

Lance was only a few more minutes after that, opening the door and coming out with a towel wrapped around his waist and Shiro gestured to his clothes on the chair.

“Thanks.” Lance said, picking them up.

Shiro stood up, going to the bathroom and turning in the doorway to say something, but unsure of what.

Lance looked at him with a small smile. “It was good to see you.” He said and Shiro nodded.

“Yeah, you too.” He said, retreating into the bathroom and closing the door behind him.

He knew Lance would be gone when he got out, but that did nothing to help the underlying anxiety in his stomach as he stepped into the shower. Things felt… awkward now. Maybe a little. Shiro wasn’t sure, but he didn’t feel good about it.

He didn’t regret it; the sex had been incredible. But he really hoped that this wouldn’t do any damage to his and Lance’s friendship.

He spent longer than necessary in the shower, before heading back out into his room, rubbing himself down with his towel and putting some clean clothes on.

He blew out a long breath, running a hand through his hair and flopping down onto his bed, no longer smelling of sex and of clean linen, instead. 

He pulled out his tablet and got up one of the books he still had left to read to take his mind off of it. There was no use fretting. They’d fucked and it had been incredible, and if there was fallout, then Shiro would deal with it.

 

***

 

Shiro didn’t see Lance for a few days after that, using that time to go and visit Pidge, Matt and Hunk while they were still on Earth, before being informed that they’d be staying a few days extra to do some routine exams and repairs of the Atlas.

Shiro spent his time loitering around the Garrison, figuring that Lance must have gone back home by now and he didn’t want to dwell on that for too long, but he did, feeling as though they’d left things on a strange note, and wanting to clear the air between them.

It took him completely by surprise when he ran into Lance in the cafeteria a few days later, quite literally too, nearly making him drop his lunch.

“Lance!” He said in surprise as Lance jumped, clutching onto his tray. “I’m sorry, are you okay?”

“I’m fine, Shiro. You just scared me.” He said with a small smile.

“Do you want to um, join me?” He asked and Lance hesitated and then nodded.

“Yeah, sure.” He smiled, following Shiro to a table and sitting down opposite him.

“I thought you’d gone home.” He said and Lance laughed, shaking his head.

“And not say goodbye to you? Nah.”

Shiro gave a small laugh at that. “Well, I wasn’t sure. It’s been a few days since I saw you.”

Lance shrugged. “You say that, but you’ve been off doing house calls.”

“True, true.” He said and Lance rested his chin in his hands, picking at his food. “Lance.” 

Lance glanced up at him. 

“Are we good?”

“Yeah, of course.” Lance said, nodding, though Shiro wasn’t convinced.

“Are you sure?”

Lance bit his lip. “I don’t… I don’t usually screw around with people I know. Especially not- well.”

Shiro nodded and Lance was quiet for a few minutes, Shiro letting him collect his thoughts.

“I wanted to ask. This might be- a really weird request and you can absolutely say no, of course.” He said and Shiro nodded. “Would you want to be a guest in one of my videos?”

Shiro blinked at him, taking a moment to figure out what Lance was asking him. Was Lance asking him to film a porn video with him?

Lance’s smirk and raised eyebrow told Shiro that he had absolutely said that outloud. “Yes. Keep your voice down unless you want rumours spreading, Captain.”

Shiro swallowed. Lance calling him Captain shouldn’t have been so hot.

“You don’t have to say yes. I won’t be offended.” Lance said with a smile, obviously taking Shiro’s silence as hesitance.

“Yes.” He said quickly. “No, I uh- yes.”

“Yes?” He asked, tilting his head with a teasing smile.

As if Shiro would have been able to say no with Lance looking at him like that. Maybe it was a terrible idea. Would perhaps destroy his career if anyone found it. Even if it would be incredibly difficult to, Shiro had still found Lance’s, hadn’t he? 

“Yes.” He didn’t care. Anything to have Lance again.

“Mm, can I come to your room later?”

Shiro swallowed and nodded.

“I’ll bring my stuff.” Lance said, grabbing up his sandwich off of his plate and getting up, throwing Shiro a wink over his shoulder, and then he was gone.

Shiro stared after him, picking at his own food and eventually getting up, cleaning both his and Lance’s trays away and going heading back to his room. 

He didn’t know when Lance was coming over, and he didn’t want to seem _too_ eager, but he figured that he’d head back anyway. He tidied the very minimal mess, and considered changing his sheets, but he figured that Lance wouldn’t mind much, and he’d have to change them afterwards anyway.

He blew out a breath, lounging on his bed as he waited for him, wishing that Lance would give him a ballpark time because he was already sporting a bit of a semi just at the anticipation of waiting for him, knowing that he was going to get to be buried back inside that incredible heat again, touch Lance’s gorgeous body and get him to make those beautiful little noises for him.

That people would watch them together and jack off like Shiro had done so many times. Wish that it was their cock disappearing inside of him instead, but it wasn’t. It was _Shiro’s_. 

_Shiro got that privilege_.

Shiro jumped violently when there was a knock on his door a little while later, getting up and smoothing down the bedsheets, opening the door.

“Hey Shiro.” Lance said with a smile, sauntering in and setting his camera equipment down on the side, taking his shoes and socks off.

“Hi.” Shiro said, closing and locking the door behind him and swallowing.

“You still good for this?” Lance asked, tilting his head.

“Oh, I’m very good.” Shiro said, voice cracking a little and he flushed in embarrassment, clearing his throat.

Lance hummed, looking at him for a long moment. “Okay, as long as you’re sure.” He said, setting the camera up facing the bed. “I’m just gonna set it going and then I’ll edit it all together.”

Shiro nodded. “Okay.”

“You wanna get on the bed?” Lance asked in a soft tease.

Shiro opted to do as he was told instead of glaring at him and Lance’s lip quirked.

“You’re very obedient.” He said, biting his lip. “You’re a good boy, Shiro.”

Shiro _did_ glare at him. “Shut up.”

“Am I a good boy?” He asked, tilting his head and hooking his thumbs into his belt loops.

“Definitely not.” He said and Lance pouted. 

“Why not?”

“You’re a terrible tease.” Shiro said, looking Lance up and down. 

Lance smirked. “I try.”

“So no, you’re not a good boy.”

“Am I a… _bad boy_...?”

Shiro pursed his lips and raised an eyebrow. “Yes, Lance. You’re a bad boy.”

Lance bit his lip and hummed, walking over to the bed and pushing Shiro down, fisting his collar and pulling him up to meet his lips. “Yeah?” He asked breathily against them.

“Absolutely.” Shiro agreed, kissing him hard, one hand going to his hips, other hand burying itself in his hair.

Lance groaned softly, wasting no time and rocking his hips down against Shiro’s, messily kissing him as he went for his shirt, quickly unbuttoning it and pulling it off of his shoulders, moaning in encouragement as Shiro did the same to his, quickly pulling it over his head and tossing it aside, smoothing his hands down Lance’s chest. 

Lance gave a breathless moan, still rocking his hips, tossing his head back as Shiro attached his lips to his neck, kissing down his throat and chest until he reached a nipple, latching onto it and sucking softly.

Lance groaned, burying a hand in Shiro’s hair, holding him in place as he teased his tongue over the bud, bringing his other hand up to lightly tug and pull at the other.

“Shiro…” Lance moaned, rocking his hips harder for a few moments before going for Shiro’s waistband, quickly unbuttoning his pants. “Off, off, want them off.” He said. 

Shiro was quick to comply, slipping Lance out of his lap and pulling his trousers down and off, glancing at Lance as he quickly did the same. 

Lance whined as Shiro rolled on top of him, pressing him into the mattress and kissing him deeply, slipping his tongue between his parted lips as he gasped, filled with a little more confidence this time around, knowing that Lance had wanted this this much too, enough to ask for him again. On camera. Trusted Shiro enough to perform for his fans.

Lance hooked a leg around one of Shiro’s quickly bucking his hips up against Shiro’s, hard cocks sliding together through their underwear as they swallowed each other’s moans.

“You gonna stretch me this time?” Lance asked breathlessly against his lips and Shiro nodded. “Looks better in the video.”

“Can I, um-” Shiro asked, swallowing.

“What?” Lance asked, pecking his lips. “You can do whatever you want to me.”

Shiro wet his lip. “Eat you out?” He murmured and Lance gave a small whine, nodding.

“Yeah, fuck.” He nodded. “You- definitely can.”

“Will you sit on my face?” He asked and Lance bit his lip, nodding. 

“Uh huh.” 

“You wanna do that now for me, baby?” Shiro breathed and Lance swallowed, pushing Shiro back down, letting him hook his thumbs into the waistband of his underwear and pull them down, dropping them off the edge of the bed with their other clothes.

“You thought about this?” Lance asked, already a little breathless as Shiro gripped his thighs and pulled him over his face.

“So much.” Shiro agreed, leaning up to lick a stripe up his perunium, before sucking one of his balls into his mouth.

Lance breathed a soft sigh, lowering himself over Shiro’s face, thighs on either side of his head, burying one hand in the front part of Shiro’s hair.

Shiro groaned softly, pulling his mouth away and nuzzling his nose against his hole, blowing out a breath before darting his tongue out to lap over it.

Lance gasped, muscles jumping a little and he curled his fingers in Shiro’s hair, moaning softly. 

Shiro hummed against him, burying his tongue inside of him, teeth catching on his rim, moaning as he ate him out until Lance was rocking his hips, whimpering and whining, fingers curled tightly into his hair.

“Shiro- Shiro- can I- can you-” He moaned, lifting his hips a little enough for Shiro to reply.

“What, baby?”

“Lie down?” He asked breathlessly, thighs shaking a little and Shiro hummed, pressing a kiss to his inner thigh and nodding.

“Mmhm.” He said and Lance got off of him, laying on his back and spreading his legs widely.

Shiro wasted no time getting back between them, burying himself back against Lance’s hole, laving his tongue over him, thrusting it into him and suckling at his rim as he went.

Lance moaned desperately, grabbing back onto Shiro’s hair tightly, back arching off of the bed a little and Shiro could tell how he was restraining himself from rocking his hips back against Shiro’s face.

“Shiro, Shiro, Shiro…” Lance whimpered, gasping harshly and then thrusting the lube at Shiro that he must have found on his bedside table.

Shiro hummed, huffing a laugh and taking it from him, pulling away and looking up at him.

Lance looked wrecked, chest heaving and eyes screwed shut, lips parted as he gasped and moaned.

“Finger me, please, please, I want you to fuck me- fuck…” 

“Shh, I’ve got you.” Shiro soothed, coating his fingers in lube and slipping two easily into Lance, watching Lance’s face as it contorted in pleasure.

“Oh fuck…” He groaned, rocking his hips, cock flushed and hard against his abdomen, and Shiro bit his lip, beginning to gently thrust them into him.

Lance gasped, whining, as Shiro spread them inside of him, fucking him with them for a few moments before crooking his fingers, feeling around for his prostate.

Lance gasped harshly when he found it, arching off of the bed and panting hard. 

“There, there, there, there…” He moaned, and Shiro rubbed his fingers over the spot quickly, drawing a small sob from Lance.

Shiro slid a third finger into him, spreading them inside of him as he fucked him with them, watching him breathlessly.

“I’m good- I’m good, I’m good, fuck me…” Lance whimpered and Shiro pulled his fingers from him.

“I uh, picked up some condoms. Just in case.”

Lance shook his head. “Nah.” He said breathlessly. “I want a shot of your cum dripping out of me.”

“Shit.” Shiro said, swallowing thickly.

“Mmmhm, now fuck me, _please_.”

“How do you want…?”

“You can have me on my knees if you want.” Lance said, raising an eyebrow and Shiro swallowed thickly, nodding.

Lance laughed breathlessly, getting onto his knees, pushing his ass up towards Shiro, resting on his forearms, glancing back at him as he shook his ass a little. 

“Shiro, don’t make me beg.” He said, batting his lashes at him and biting his lip. 

How Shiro had ever survived being in the same room as Lance up until this point was beyond him, and he was unsure that he would ever be able to be, again.

“ _Please_.” Lance pouted. “Give me your cock, baby, please.” 

If Lance was trying to make this easier for Shiro, he wasn’t going about it the right way. Shiro shook it off, finally getting his brain to respond, smoothing his hands over Lance’s ass and gripping his hips, kneeling up behind him and grinding his cock over Lance’s ass a few times.

Lance groaned softly, head falling forward and Shiro blew out a long breath, lining himself up and gently rubbing the head of his cock over Lance’s entrance, before slowly pushing into him.

Lance moaned, trying to rock back onto Shiro’s cock, but Shiro moved backwards as he did, not wanting to rush, knowing he’d overwhelm himself. Lance whined as he was unable to take more of him in, and Shiro gently stroked his thumbs over Lance’s hips, easing himself in until he was fully seated inside of him.

He groaned, taking in a few deep breaths and just enjoying the tight heat wrapped around his cock and the breathless little noises that Lance was making.

“Please…” He whined softly, and it was a complete 180 on his cocky behaviour from the time before.

Shiro bit his lip, groaning softly at the thought. Lance was a cocky little shit until he got shoved full of cock, and then he was nothing but a whining begging mess.

Shiro swallowed, slowly drawing his cock out of him, head catching on his rim and slipping out and Lance whimpered at the loss. Shiro guided his cock back to his entrance, pushing slowly back into him, grinding against him when his balls rested against the curve of his ass.

“Shiro, I swear to god…”

“I’ve got you.” He said, drawing his cock back out and setting a slow pace.

Shiro picked up the pace a little after a few moments, having gotten used a little to the overwhelming sensation again of having Lance wrapped tightly around his cock.

Lance was panting, rocking steadily back to meet each of his thrusts, moaning each time he bottomed out inside of him, and Shiro was biting down on his lip, groaning softly and stroking his thumbs over Lance’s hips.

“So good…” Lance moaned, pressing his face into the sheets and groaning, quickly rocking back against him to meet each thrust as Shiro picked up the pace, fucking into him harder and faster, burying himself inside of Lance again and again until Lance was nothing but a whining, mewling mess on the bed beneath him.

His cock was drooling over the sheets beneath them, and he gave a soft sob as Shiro reached around to wrap a hand around his length, teasing his thumb over the head of his cock and sliding it through his leaking slit, Lance’s thighs shaking, body jerking as he did so.

Shiro fucked into him deeply, thrusting in hard, desperately chasing his own pleasure, shifting his hips a little and helping to pull Lance over his cock with his free hand until he got the angle right and hit into his prostate, Lance crying out, back arching a little.

Shiro made an effort after that to keep hitting into it, Lance’s cock leaking a new stream of precum with each brush against it, giving a small sob. 

“Lance…” Shiro groaned, whining as he ground his cock into him.

“Shiro- Shiro, I’m not- I’m close-” He whimpered, body shaking as he rocked back against him and Shiro fucked quickly into him.

“M-Me too, it’s okay.” Shiro groaned, balls slapping against his ass.

“Fuck, please…” Lance whined and Shiro rubbed through his slit, grinding his cock into his prostate and that was all it took to send Lance over the edge, spilling over the sheets and moaning desperately.

“Fuck, fuck, _Lance_.” Shiro groaned as Lance clenched around him, milking his orgasm from him, and Shiro thrust into him a few more times before spilling into him.

They stayed like that for a few moments before Shiro regretfully pulled his cock from him, groaning softly as a small amount of cum dribbled from his ass and he used his thumb to push it back in, making Lance whimper.

“G-get the camera and do that again.” He said weakly, and Shiro got up, getting the camera off of the stand and bringing it over, aiming it at his ass as a little more cum dripped out.

Shiro watched, filming as Lance pushed more out, letting it drip down his balls and inner thighs, before Shiro brought his hand up, thumbing over Lance’s hole and scooping a little back inside.

Lance whimpered, Shiro pushing two fingers into him, spreading them inside of him and filming as a little more cum dripped out, fingering him gently for a few moments until Lance was pushing forward, away from the touch and Shiro pulled them out.

He put the camera down, switching it off and flopping back onto the bed beside Lance.

They both lay there for a few minutes to get their breath back and Shiro didn’t dare throw an arm across his waist like he wanted to, just listening to his breathing as it slowly evened out.

“You got enough stuff, d’you think?” Shiro asked after a few moments.

“Why, looking for another round?” Lance quipped, turning onto his side and looking at Shiro with a grin.

Shiro huffed a laugh, rolling his eyes. 

“I’ll send you a link when I’m done.” He said with a tired hum, still not making a move to leave.

“Okay.” Shiro agreed, blowing out a breath.

Lance hummed softly, laying there for a few more moments before hauling himself up. 

“I’m gonna hop in the shower.” He said, getting up and stretching, heading to the bathroom door and Shiro watched him go, not moving and laying there until he emerged again.

Shiro watched him as he walked across the room, towel slung low on his hips gathering up his clothes and putting them back on.

“You okay there, big guy?” He asked with a lopsided grin and Shiro hummed, nodding.

“Mmmhm.” He said, smiling softly back at him.

“Okay, well I’m gonna head out, okay?” 

“Yeah.” Shiro hummed as Lance stood up. “Actually, Lance?” He asked and Lance stopped in the doorway.

“Yeah?”

“Do you want to get dinner with me before I leave?” He asked.

Lance looked at him for a very long moment. “Yeah, okay. That sounds nice.” He said with a smile.

“Okay, well I’ll see you around then.” He said with a smile and Lance nodded, giving him another smile before leaving, closing the door behind him.

Shiro blew out a long breath, feeling significantly happier and more contented this time around, hauling himself up a few minutes later and getting in the shower.

 

***

 

In all honesty, Shiro wasn’t too sure why Lance had stuck around the Garrison for this long post docking. He’d greeted Veronica, and he’d met up with Shiro a few times, but other than that Shiro wasn’t sure what Lance was spending his days doing.

He still didn’t know where Lance was staying, either, so Lance was supposed to be coming to his room for the date and then Shiro would take him from there.

Shiro wasn’t necessarily counting on getting lucky, but all things considered he figured his odds were good, so he changed his sheets and tidied his room anyway, showering extra thoroughly as he got ready.

He’d spent longer than necessary choosing what to wear, and he wasn’t stressing at all about this. Nope. Technically, he hadn’t specified to Lance that it was a date, so this could have just been another one of those friendly ‘getting food together’ instances.

But under the premise that it was a date, and honestly Shiro wasn’t entirely sure when these slight feelings for Lance had developed, but he supposed that once you added sex to friendship, there was a very very fine line that Shiro was most definitely in the process of crossing.

He just hoped that Lance was crossing it with him.

He’d eventually gotten ready, just in time for Lance to be knocking on his door. Shiro opened it with a smile, running his eyes over Lance.

“Hey.” Lance smiled, and Shiro bit his lip.

“Hey. You look nice.” He said, and Lance laughed softly.

“Not so bad yourself. Ready to go?” 

“Mmmhm.” Shiro nodded, leading him out, closing his door behind him and Lance looped his arm through Shiro’s. 

He lead him to a car he’d borrowed, opening Lance’s door for him and getting into the drivers side.

“I figured that there aren’t too many nice places around here.” He said with a shrug at Lance’s questioning glance.

“I didn’t know you were taking me to a _nice_ place.” He said, eyebrows raised.

“Well…” Shiro said with a shrug. “I wanted to.” He said, unable to think of another explanation.

Lance looked at him for a long moment, cheeks pink. “This thing have radio?” He asked, changing the subject.

“Yeah, should do.” Shiro said, nodding and Lance fiddled around with the controls for a bit, before soft music started playing from the speakers.

It didn’t take them long to get there, only driving a little way away from the base, Lance humming along to the music. Once they’d parked up and gotten out, Lance took Shiro’s arm again, and really, Shiro shouldn’t have liked that as much as he did, as he lead them to the doors, pushing them open and heading inside.

They were quickly shown to their table, a booth in the corner and maybe it was a little too romantic with fairy lights strung and a candle in a lantern hung, but they were here now.

“This is pretty.” Lance commented softly, sliding into the seat and Shiro hummed in agreement, doing the same.

“Yeah, it’s nice.” He said, glancing around and sliding Lance a menu.

Lance hummed, opening it and looking over the options and Shiro did the same, giving their order to the waiter when he came to take their order.

“So when are you heading back out then?” Shiro asked, tilting his head as the waiter took away their menus.

Lance hummed and shrugged. “Maybe a week or so, I’m not sure. I’ll stick around to see you guys off and then I’ll head home for a few days and then I’ll probably get back out there.” He said noncommittally.

“Mm, I see.” Shiro said, nodding. “Well, I’ve got a day or so, yet.”

“Mmmmhm.” Lance hummed. “Yeah, it’s been nice seeing you again.” He said with a genuine smile and Shiro smiled back.

“Yeah, it has.” He said. He meant it. Not just the sex, though that had been really great, too. It had been nice seeing Lance again.

“How long are you going to be gone for this time?”

“Uh, I think we’re scheduled four months, but that’s probably turn to five or six, judging from past trips.” He shrugged. “If you’re ever out, though and you’re connected, we should chat.”

“Yeah, definitely. If you’re online I’ll give you a call. We shouldn’t leave it so long.” He said. “I’ve been trying to get hold of Keith for the longest time now.” He said with a sigh, resting his chin in his hand.

Shiro agreed, frowning. “Yeah, me too. I think I’m going to have to make a detour to go and check on him. Tell him to keep in touch more. I know he’s very busy right now, and he loses track of time, but it’d still be nice to hear from him.”

“Yeah. You can tell him we all miss him, and that he needs to come home one of these days.” 

“I will, definitely.” Shiro agreed with a small laugh. “We should have a get together for a few days this year. It’ll be nice.”

“Yeah.” Lance agreed with a wistful smile. “Yeah, it will.”

“D’you not get lonely?” Shiro asked after a few moments, tilting his head. “Planet hopping by yourself?”

Lance hummed and shrugged. “Yes and no. It’s fine, I mean I spend a week here and there and I make friends with the locals, get a quick lay.” He said with a wink. “And then I’m off to a new place, making more friends and I go back sometimes see old ones, you know. It’s fine. I’m never out for too long, though, I can always come home and see my family. I think they’d kill me if I just took off for months again, they worry enough as it is.”

Shiro nodded. “Well, that’s understandable. We did disappear for years. Even though the war’s over, space can still be dangerous.”

“I can protect myself, Shiro.” Lance said, giving him a look.

“Oh, I know you can, I wasn’t suggesting that, at all.” Shiro said quickly. “I just meant that it’s only natural for them to worry about you.”

Lance shrugged and nodded. “Yeah, I guess so.”

Lance opened his mouth, about to say something else when the waiter brought their food, setting their plates down in front of them.

“This looks good.” Lance said instead, picking up his cutlery and digging in.

It was a few minutes of a comfortable silence as they ate before Shiro felt anything. It was subtle, but there, the press of Lance’s foot against his calf. He must have slipped out of his shoe, because he could feel the deliberate press of his toes through his trousers.

Shiro glanced up at him, but Lance didn’t meet his gaze, seemingly unaware of his actions, but Shiro knew better.

He swallowed as Lance delicately dragged his shoe up and down Shiro’s leg, teasingly slowly and Shiro was grateful for the slight hang of the table cloth, and the fact that they were right in the corner in dimly lit light so that hopefully no one would see them. 

Lance didn’t look up at him for a few minutes, just eating his food and slowly dragging his foot over Shiro’s leg.

“Is yours good?” He asked, finally looking up at him, dragging his foot up with him, up to Shiro’s thigh now and inching closer to his crotch.

“What?”

“Your food.” Lance said with an amused smile, subtly shifting forward in his seat so that he could stretch his foot closer to Shiro’s crotch. “Is it good?”

Shiro swallowed. “Yes, uh, yes. It’s very good.” He said, feeling his cheeks heat a little, glancing around to make sure no one was looking, even if he knew that they wouldn’t be able to see anything.

“Mm, that’s good. I haven’t been here before, I’ll have to come again.” Lance said conversationally, stroking his foot along Shiro’s inner thigh as he picked up his drink and took a sip, keeping eye contact with Shiro.

“Mmmhm. It’s good here, yeah.” Shiro said quickly, nodding, trying not to lose his composure. 

“Were you thinking of ordering a dessert?” Lance asked, tilting his head and pushing his foot slightly more forward, pressing against Shiro’s clothed crotch where his traitorous cock had perked up considerably in interest, already semi hard in his pants.

“What?” Shiro asked, mouth dry. “Oh, uh, y-yes. No. No.”

“No?” Lance asked with a teasing smile, stroking his foot over Shiro’s cock with an amused expression.

“No. I was thinking of having dessert, but I’m not going to order any, no. Unless you would like some.”

Lance hummed in deliberation, taking in his last mouthful and chewing deliberately slowly, and swallowing, licking his lips and Shiro tracked the movement with his eyes.

“Mm, I agree. I would like a little _something_ , you know? But I don’t think I’d like dessert, so to speak.”

Shiro swallowed thickly as Lance gave a deliberate press of his toes against his cock and Shiro’s breath hitched, hoping that Lance was going down the same path that he was.

“O-oh. Are you um, ready to go, then?” He asked.

“Mmhm. You want to split?” 

Shiro shook his head. “N-no, that’s okay. I can pay.” He said, though really, he should have taken him up on it, just as compensation for all this teasing and now how hard he currently was in his pants.

“Are you sure?” Lance asked, frowning, pressing harder over his cock and Shiro had to swallow a needy whimper.

“Y-yes.” He said, grabbing the attention of a waiter and asking for the bill.

“Okay, well I’m just going to go and freshen up in the bathroom for a few minutes.” He said, giving Shiro a long deliberate look, followed by the stroking of his toes over his cock, before withdrawing his foot, giving him a bright smile and getting up, heading for the bathroom.

Shiro blew out a shaky breath, paying for the meal as quickly as he could and then getting up and following Lance into the bathroom, finding him leaning against the window sill, arms folded across his chest with a self satisfied smirk as Shiro came in.

“That wasn’t very nice.” Shiro said, voice a little rough, cock straining against his pants, walking over to Lance and pressing himself against him.

“Oh, how ever can I make it up to you, Shiro, dear?” He asked innocently, looking up at him through long lashes.

Shiro flicked his eyes down to Lance’s lips, and then back up to his eyes, pushing him into one of the stalls and closing the door behind them, drawing the lock across and raising an eyebrow.

“You want me to get on my knees for you in a public bathroom like a cheap slut?” Lance asked, raising an eyebrow back.

“You _are_ a cheap slut.” Shiro said, voice low and rough and he watched as Lance swallowed, immediately getting onto his knees and making quick work of Shiro’s pants.

He unbuckled his belt and unzipped his pants, pulling them down and immediately leaning in to mouth over Shiro’s hard cock through his underwear.

Shiro groaned softly, burying a hand in Lance’s hair. “There’s a good boy, Lance.” He said softly and Lance looked up at him, batting his lashes.

“Thought I was a bad boy.” He murmured against him, reluctant to pull away as he laved his tongue over him.

“Clearly you know how to be both.” Shiro said back, fingers curling in his hair. “Don’t waste time, Lance.”

Lance whined, pulling back and pulling Shiro’s underwear down, getting out his cock and giving a soft groan, stroking his hand over it.

“Did that work you up, big guy?” Lance asked teasingly, looking up at him as he flicked his tongue out over the head and Shiro grit his teeth, giving a small hiss.

“You know it did.” He said back, using his grip on Lance’s hair to pull him away from his cock, huffing in amusement as Lance gave a small unhappy whine. 

Shiro took his cock in hand, guiding it to Lance’s lips and Lance obediently parted them, looking up at him as Shiro slipped his cock into his mouth, groaning as he pressed into the wet heat, Lance moaning around him, eyes fluttering closed.

“God, I’ve never seen you look so content as when you have a cock in your mouth.” Shiro groaned softly and Lance whimpered, looking up at him as Shiro began to shallowly thrust into his mouth. “I know you can take it, I know you want it.” He murmured. “Can I?”

“Uh huh.” Lance moaned, nodding around him, letting Shiro hold his head in place by his hair as he pushed his cock into his mouth, pushing in until his balls rested against Lance’s chin and the head of his cock had slipped down his throat.

Shiro wondered if Lance had ever had a gag reflex, or if he’d deepthroated massive cocks until it was gone, trained it away by letting anyone who wanted him fuck into that tight little throat, as long as they had a big enough cock to satisfy him.

Shiro kept it gentle at first, just slowly rocking into his mouth, watching the blissed out expression on Lance’s face, thrusting into his mouth, shallowly for a few, before pushing in the whole way, cock sliding down his throat again, Lance groaning as his balls lightly slapped against his chin.

Lance whined softly, looking up at him, sliding his hands up to grip the back of Shiro’s thighs and lightly trying to pull him against him.

“Oh? You want it harder?” Shiro asked, raising an eyebrow and Lance nodded.

“Mmmhm.” He made a noise of affirmation and Shiro hummed in deliberation.

Shiro began to pick up the pace after that, fucking deeply into his mouth, pulling Lance’s head over his cock to meet his thrusts, groaning softly and listening to Lance’s needy little whimpers as he fucked into his mouth, picking up the pace until his balls were audibly slapping against his skin and if anyone were to walk in, they would know exactly what was going on.

Lance whimpered, taking him eagerly in, just letting Shiro use him, pulling his face over his cock as he thrust deeply into him, getting a little more rough with each thrust and Shiro could tell from the way Lance was moaning that that was exactly how he liked it, that he hadn’t been putting on a show in any of his videos, he really was just that much of a cockwhore.

“God, Lance…” Shiro groaned, snapping his hips, feeling Lance’s throat convulse around him, pulling Lance over him and holding his head in place, nose pressed against his pelvis until he had to pull him off so that Lance could breathe, panting harshly saliva dribbling from his mouth, a fine string connecting his lips and Shiro’s cock.

“Please…” Lance whimpered breathlessly, looking so blissed out like this that Shiro had no choice but to fuck roughly back into his throat, muffling Lance’s moan as he was filled back up.

Shiro stilled as he heard the creak of the door swing open, and he tightened his grip in Lance’s hair, not letting him move as he slowed the pace right down, fucking into him nice and deep, before pulling him off and rubbing his leaking tip over Lance’s moistened lips. 

Lance gave a tiny whine, flicking his tongue out through his slit, looking up at him with tear pricked eyes, straining against Shiro’s hold to wrap his lips around the head of his cock, suckling hard and Shiro had to bite down hard on his lip to muffle himself. 

It was an agonisingly long time before they heard the door swing closed again, though it was probably only a minute or two, and Shiro barely gave Lance a moment before he was fucking deeply back into his throat, resting his head against the stall wall and pushing his cock into his throat, grinding against his face as Lance gave a desperate whimper.

“Fuck.” Shiro cursed, biting his lip.

He resumed the rough pace, fucking Lance’s face against the wall for a few moments before tightening his grip on his hair and pulling his face down over his cock again, giving a soft groan each time Lance’s throat convulsed around him as he slipped down into it, watching as tears slipped from Lance’s eyes down his cheeks.

“You okay?” He asked, not letting up, but ready to stop if Lance asked, but Lance quickly nodded, moaning.

“Uh huh.” He made a noise of affirmation, letting his jaw slack wider as Shiro used his mouth.

“I’m not gonna- last-” Shiro groaned and Lance made another noise of agreement, eyes slipping closed as Shiro fucked deeply into his throat, hips stuttering.

Lance quickly pulled back, and Shiro let him, not wanting to cum down his throat if Lance didn’t want it, and Lance quickly replaced his mouth with his hand, working him quickly, parting his lips and looking up at him with a tired lopsided grin.

“On my face.” He said breathlessly, quickly jerking him off and Shiro groaned.

“Lance, Lance, fuck.” He moaned, only lasting for a few strokes more of his cock after Lance said that, spilling hard over his face, cum landing in thick hot ropes over his cheeks and his mouth, a little getting inside onto his waiting tongue.

Lance groaned, panting, and grinning up at him, before fishing his phone out of his pocket and handing it to Shiro.

“Picture.” He said, and Shiro fumbled with the camera, opening it and taking a picture of Lance’s cum painted face, before handing it back to him. 

Lance blew out a long breath, licking his lips and then letting Shiro help him to his feet. Shiro wrapped an arm around his waist to steady him, legs clearly having gone a little numb, and he held him like that for a few moments before Lance extracted himself, pulling the lock on the door and going over to the sink, getting some paper towels and washing the cum from his face.

“Ready to go?” He asked, and Shiro nodded, tucking his cock back into his pants and holding the bathroom door open for him.

Their table had been cleared as they walked back through the restaurant, new customers already been lead to their table, and so they quickly made their way out, stopping at the car and getting in.

“You coming back to mine?” Shiro asked as he started the engine and Lance nodded.

“Mmmhm, if you think you’re leaving me this hard-” He said with a grin and Shiro chuckled.

“Wouldn’t dream of it.” 

“Good, because I stretched myself before I came.” Lance said, smirking as he glanced at him and Shiro practically choked.

“You did?”

“Mmmhm. Considered asking you to fuck me in the bathroom, but I didn’t want you to stop fucking my face.”

“Cockwhore.” Shiro said with a small laugh and Lance winked at him.

“You know it.” He agreed.

Lance put the radio back on, humming softly as Shiro drove them back, parking up the car and walking with Lance back to the Atlas and towards his room.

He’d barely locked the door before Lance was pushing him backwards towards the bed, kissing him hard.

“Woah, let’s get our shoes off, at least.” Shiro chuckled and Lance gave a frustrated whine, kicking his shoes off and waiting for Shiro to do the same before pushing him down on the bed and straddling him. 

“Should’ve had you fuck me there.” He whined, grinding his hips down over Shiro’s as he kissed him.

“Slow down, baby, I’ll give you what you want.” Shiro soothed, hands going to Lance’s hips.

“I want your cock, and I want it _now_.” Lance whined frustratedly, going for Shiro’s belt and quickly unbuckling it, groaning in frustration as as he couldn’t pull Shiro’s pants down quick enough.

“And I said _slow down_.” Shiro said, raising an eyebrow challengingly.

Lance huffed, curling in on himself and slipping out of Shiro’s lap.

“There’s a good boy.” Shiro said, taking his pants off and his underwear, unbuttoning his shirt and ridding himself of that, too.

Lance bit his lip as he watched him and Shiro raised an eyebrow. 

“Are you planning on getting fucked fully clothed?”

Lance quickly shook his head, making quick work of his own clothes.

“Now come back.” Shiro said, patting his lap. “But take your time. I know you’re a little whore that desperate to be filled, but you won’t enjoy it that way.” He said, raising an eyebrow and Lance visibly shuddered at his words.

He obediently climbed back into Shiro’s lap, straddling him, cock flushed and hard, curving upwards towards his abdomen, and he wrapped his fingers around Shiro’s cock, still mostly soft but having perked up a little in interest.

Shiro hummed softly, leaning back against the headboard and letting Lance work his fingers over him, slowly coaxing him back to hardness as he rocked his own hips a little, nothing to grind his cock against, the movement mostly seeming absent minded as he concentrated on pouring his attention over Shiro’s cock. 

Shiro gave a soft groan, hands on Lance’s hips and gently stroking over his skin in soft encouragement, Lance gently teasing the head, before looking at Shiro and pouting.

“Please?” He asked softly, fluttering his lashes and there was no way for Shiro to say no to him.

“Okay, baby.” Shiro nodded, keeping his hands on Lance’s hips, helping him onto his cock, both groaning softly as he sank down onto him.

Lance immediately started rocking his hips, biting his lip with a soft whimper, holding onto Shiro’s shoulders to steady himself as he carefully lifted himself up, rocking back down, taking him back in.

Lance whined, brows pinched and lips parted as he moaned, Shiro sliding a hand up his back to lace through his hair, guiding his lips to his own, pressing them together, Lance immediately nipping at his bottom lip with a gasp and slipping his tongue into Shiro’s mouth, kissing him deeply and messily. 

Shiro groaned, rocking his hips up, thrusting up to meet Lance as he fucked himself over his cock, slipping his hand back down to grip his hips, pulling Lance down onto him each time he lifted himself.

“Shiro, Shiro, fuck…” Lance whined, shifting his hips and crying out as Shiro hit into his prostate, precum beading at the tip of his cock and slipping down his shaft.

“Doing so good, baby.” Shiro murmured, fingertips digging into his hips, rocking his hips at what he was trying to keep a steady pace, trying to keep Lance angled on him to hit there again. 

Lance cried out, head tipping back and back arching a little, clinging onto Shiro’s shoulders tighter. 

Shiro held him steady, rocking his hips against Lance, bringing one hand around to wrap around his leaking cock, teasingly stroking over it at first, rubbing his thumb over the underside of the head, catching a bead of precum as it dripped, and Lance whimpered.

“I’m- I’m not gonna-” Lance whimpered, rocking his hips and pushing his cock into Shiro’s hand.

“It’s okay, baby.” Shiro cooed. “You were worked up for a long time, you can cum when you’re ready.”

Lance gave a breathy whine, desperately rutting his cock into Shiro’s hand, using Shiro’s cock like a plug, just rocking his hips and whining, gasping harshly each time Shiro’s cock brushed against his prostate.

“Shiro, Shiro…” He whined, eyes screwed shut and lips parted as he panted, cock leaking heavily over Shiro’s hand as he worked him.

“Come on, baby, you can do it.” Shiro murmured, firmly working his hand over Lance’s cock, lightly rocking his hips into Lance, keeping one hand steady on his hip, thrusting his cock shallowly into him.

Lance moaned, whining softly, biting down on his lip hard as he came, spilling over Shiro’s hand and Shiro groaned as Lance tightened around him.

Shiro worked him through it, slowing as Lance’s thighs began to shake a little from the overstimulation and letting him slip out of his lap and off of his cock.

He laid back on the bed, spreading his legs and quirking his lip into a smirk. 

“What are you waiting for?” Lance asked, taking his head.

“Are you um, sure?” He asked, biting his lip.

“Shiro, I thought you’d _watched_ my videos.” He said with an airy laugh, reaching out to pull Shiro down on top of him. “I can take it.”

Shiro groaned softly, pushing Lance’s thighs apart further apart and lining his cock back up, glancing up at Lance.

“ _Fuck me._ ” Lance said in a soft moan, sliding his hands down Shiro’s back, wrapping his legs around Shiro’s waist and digging his heels into the small of his back, moaning gratefully as Shiro pressed back into him.

Shiro groaned, cock sliding easily in, resting his forehead in the crook of Lance’s neck.

“Don’t hold back, okay?” Lance murmured, tracing his fingers over Shiro’s back and Shiro nodded, carefully drawing his cock back out of him.

Lance groaned as Shiro thrust back in deeply, doing as he asked and not wasting any time setting a quick hard pace, chasing his own orgasm, rutting his cock into Lance’s tight heat, mouthing messily at his collar bones.

“Oh fuck…” Lance groaned, clutching tightly at his shoulders, legs wrapped firmly around him. “Don’t- mark-” He said and Shiro made a noise of acknowledgement, keeping his nips light enough not to mark his skin as he thrust into him.

Shiro groaned, snapping his hips and fucking quickly into him, panting against him, whining as Lance clenched around him, nails digging into his back as he gasped and moaned.

“Please, please, please…” Lance moaned breathlessly, digging his heels into Shiro’s back to pull him in deeper, body jerking as Shiro hit against his prostate, gasping harshly.

Shiro groaned against him, messily mouthing at his throat, using his hands to keep Lance’s thighs apart as he drove his cock into him, hips stuttering as he got closer to his orgasm.

“Lance…” He moaned, panting, thrusts growing more erratic. 

“Shiro- Shiro, baby _please_ , cum for me _please_.” He moaned, nails scratching down his back as he hit into his prostate again, Lance clenching around him along with his words all it took to send him over the edge.

He moaned, thrusting quickly into him as he came, spilling into him, grinding his hips, before slowing them as he rode his orgasm out.

“Please, please, please, please, I’m-” Lance gasped, rutting his cock up against Shiro’s abdomen, hardened up again.

Shiro quickly wrapped his hand around him, jerking him quickly, Lance gasping and mewling, hips rocking, rutting up into Shiro’s hand a few times before spilling over his abdomen with a broken cry.

Shiro pressed a kiss to his neck as they both came down, panting against each other and staying like that for a few moments before Shiro slid his cock out of Lance and flopped down on the bed next to him. 

They lay there in a tired silence for a few minutes, breathing evening out before Lance made to get up, stretching with a soft groan and heading into the bathroom.

Shiro flicked his eyes to him, watching him leave with a soft sigh, rolling onto his back and blowing out a long breath, eyes falling closed.

“Falling asleep?” Was the next thing he was aware of, Lance freshly showered and leaning over him with a grin as Shiro blearily opened his eyes.

“Mm, no.”

“Uh huh. Whatever you say, Shiro.” He snorted. “I’ll see you around, okay?”

“Wait, Lance?” Shiro asked, sitting up, suddenly remembering that the Atlas was scheduled to leave the day after tomorrow, and Shiro wasn’t sure if he’d see Lance again before he came to say goodbye to everyone.

“Yeah?” Lance asked, turning in the doorway as he picked up his coat.

“You’re planet hopping, right?” He asked, biting his lip.

“Yes…?” Lance asked, looking at him in confusion.

“Why don’t you come with us? We stop on a ton of planets. It might be nice to… have some company.”

Lance looked at him for a long moment. “I’ve got some things to do on Earth before I leave. Maybe next time.” He said with a tight smile.

“What if we waited for you?” 

Lance blinked, frowning a little. He was quiet for a few moments. “It’s okay, I don’t want to get you guys behind schedule. I’ll see you.” He said, and that was final, that was-

Shiro sighed as Lance left, door clicking shut behind him and Shiro gave a soft groan, running his hands through his hair.

That was a very definite and firm rejection. All this was was sex, and Shiro knew that. All this was was two friends screwing around. Even if they’d been on a date today- Shiro hadn’t specified that it was a date, maybe Lance hadn’t thought it was a date.

Lance probably hadn’t even considered that it was a date and that’s why he’d looked so surprised when Shiro had said they were going somewhere nice. Maybe that was why he’d done all of the under the table stuff - to remind Shiro that all this was was sex.

If Shiro had developed some sort of crush on Lance then… that was his problem, not Lance’s. Lance didn’t want to come and be stuck on a ship with him for months, why would he?

Lance could planet hop by himself just as he always did and fuck whoever he wanted; aliens with much bigger cocks than his, who could give him a much better time than Shiro could.

What an idiot, what had he been thinking? Of course Lance wasn’t crossing that line with him, he’d never given any sort of indication that he had. Lance did casual sex all the time; hell, Lance did casual sex for a living by filming it.

Just because Shiro didn’t do casual sex unless he was drunk - didn’t do no strings attached friends with benefits… Just because he had strings didn’t mean that Lance did, didn’t mean that Lance wanted them.

Shiro sighed, rolling onto his side and curling up. He could shower later, he just wanted to go back to sleep for now, just to not think for a while.

 

***

 

Shiro didn’t see Lance the following day, busy helping with the final preparations on the Atlas so that they’d be ready for launch the following day. 

Shiro would have been lying if he said that Lance hadn’t been on his mind, no matter how distracted he may have been, he was always a constant presence lingering in the back of his mind. 

The day went by quickly and Shiro fell heavily into bed that night, sleeping soundly, incredibly tired from a hard days work, alarm set so that he would be up nice and early for the launch.

Shiro was a little jittery when he got up, he always was when they were due to relaunch for an extended amount of time. And while four months (probably six) wasn’t too long compared to previous ones… It was still a big deal, and Shiro was still incredibly aware of the fact that he’d asked Lance to come with them and Lance had said no.

That he’d given him a work around and Lance had still said no. He was really kicking himself over that. 

He saw Lance briefly, busy saying their goodbyes and making sure that everything was set, Lance flitting around, spending a great deal of time saying goodbye to Veronica, and Shiro was half convinced that Lance wasn’t going to come and say goodbye at all by the time he actually came over.

“Take care of yourself.” He said, bumping shoulders with him and offering him a smile.

“Yeah. You too, okay?” He said and Lance hummed airily, giving a nod.

They stood in a silence for a few moments that Shiro couldn’t quite tell whether it was uncomfortable or not; most likely comfortable on Lance’s part, and uncomfortable on his, before Lance stood on his tiptoes, looping his arms around Shiro’s neck.

“Give me a call once in a while, okay? I’m sure I’ll be connected to your wifi at some point.”

“I will.” Shiro said, giving a small nod and wrapping his arms around Lance’s waist.

“Promise?” He asked softly, and Shiro nodded again, holding him a little tighter.

“I promise.”

“And get hold of Keith at some point, tell him to give me a call and come home every once in a while.”

“I’ll do that too.” Shiro promised, swallowing and not wanting to let go until Lance did.

“Okay.” Lance said softly, sighing. “I’ll miss you, you have to stay in touch, Captain.”

Shiro smiled softly at that. “I will, I promise. I’ll miss you too.” He said, and bit his lip. “Are you sure? You don’t want to come?”

Lance took in a breath and gave a small sigh, shaking his head and pulling away from him. “Next time.” He said, and the moment was broken, Shiro clearing his throat and straightening up. 

“Right.” He said, nodding. “Well, I should get going, then. But uh, yeah. I’ll call you, if you’re online.”

“Make sure you do.” Lance said, biting his lip and taking a step back, letting Shiro make his leave.

“Okay. Bye.” He said softly, turning away from him and heading back towards the Atlas.

He didn’t let out the breath he’d been holding until he was in his room, door firmly closed behind him, kicking his shoes off and throwing his coat over the arm of his chair.

That was that then. He had four (six) months to get over this stupid little unrequited crush on Lance and then things would go back to normal. 

They shouldn’t have sex again, either. That would probably be a bad idea. Shiro could handle that. He’d already come to terms with the fact that he was going to once again be celibate for four (six) months, unless he fancied going out and hooking up with an alien while they were docked somewhere, but Shiro wasn’t too sure about that idea. 

They weren’t due to leave for another maybe three or four hours, and Shiro really should have still been out at the Garrison socialising and saying goodbyes, but he’d already said goodbye to everyone he wanted to, and he’d needed a moment to clear his head.

He jumped at the knock on his door, figuring that it was probably one of the crew coming to chastise him. It wasn’t very captain-like to disappear on everyone like that.

He sighed, raking a hand through his hair and going to the door, opening it. Shiro barely had a chance to take in what was happening before there were fists in his collar, pulling him down against warm lips- Lance’s lips- and he was being kissed deeply and messily- _hungrily_ \- being backed up into his room, door kicked closed behind them.

Lance pushed Shiro down on the bed, clambering over him, not breaking their kiss even for a moment as he licked into Shiro’s mouth, kissing him like he was trying to devour him whole. 

He quickly unbuttoned Shiro’s shirt, pushing it down his shoulders, biting at his bottom lip and running his hands down his chest, only breaking away to breathe and kick his shoes off.

“Lance- slow down-” Shiro said breathlessly, looking up at him.

Lance panted, wetting his lip and looking down at Shiro, brows pinched into a frown.

Shiro looked at him, still trying to process what was happening; he hadn’t been expecting to see Lance again, much less, well, this.

He flicked his gaze from Lance’s eyes to his lips and back again, unable to resist him, pouting at him like that, lips plumped and glistening. He leant forward, pulling Lance down on top of him again, pressing their lips together and wrapping his arm around Lance’s waist as he melted into the kiss.

Lance rocked his hips against Shiro’s, slipping his tongue back into his mouth, cupping his face and running his other hand down his chest.

Lance fumbled with his belt, trying to undo it with one hand, before giving in and moving his hand down to help, quickly undoing it and slipping it from his belt loops, unzipping his pants and trying to tug them down.

Lance huffed in irritance as he couldn’t get them down whining into Shiro’s mouth and then whining again when Shiro broke the kiss, slipping Lance out of his lap and stripping out of the rest of his clothes. 

Lance quickly did the same, pulling Shiro down on top of him and blindly reaching for Shiro’s drawer to get the lube, thrusting it into Shiro’s hand and spreading his legs.

Lance looked desperate, to say the least, but Shiro knew better than to ask. This was the last time they would see each other for a while, anyway, so Shiro didn’t want to risk ruining anything.

He slicked his fingers, rubbing them over Lance’s entrance and looking as he bit his lip, breathing out a soft sigh, brows pinching together.

Shiro sank two into him and Lance moaned softly, biting his lip, reaching out to pull Shiro down over him, pressing their lips together again, hands sliding over his skin.

Lance hadn’t been this handsy thus far in their… sexual escapades, and he had barely kissed Shiro, either, only when Shiro had initiated. But Shiro wasn’t going to ask. He wasn’t going to risk ruining this.

He kissed Lance back, leant into his touches, stretched him slowly and purposefully, more fingering than stretching, focusing on making Lance make such pretty little noises for him.

“Shiro, Shiro…” He whined against his lips, rocking his hips as Shiro teased over his prostate, and Shiro hummed softly in response, taking Lance’s bottom lip between his teeth and nibbling lightly.

Lance moaned, rocking his hips harder, gasping and whining. 

“Shh, I’ve got you.” Shiro said softly, rubbing his fingers over his prostate and swallowing Lance’s groan as he slid their tongues together, other hand wrapping around Lance’s cock.

“Please, please, please…” Lance whimpered, gasping as his hips jerked.

Shiro hummed, considering working him up for a little longer, but he seemed desperate in a way that he hadn’t been yet, so he gave in, pulling his fingers out and coating his cock with lube, lining up to his entrance.

He pressed a series of soft kisses to Lance’s lips as he slid in, Lance eagerly arching into each one, mewling quietly into his mouth, wrapping his limbs around him and pulling him closer.

They moaned into each other’s mouths as Shiro slid in completely, panting softly against each other for a few moments before Shiro began to move, drawing his cock out of Lance and sliding it back in. 

He rested his forehead against Lance, breathing becoming too heavy to comfortably keep kissing him as he rocked into him, Lance ever trying to pull him closer, hands roaming over his skin, nails digging in each time he hit against his prostate before softening and soothing over the marks they made. 

Lance pulled him back in for another kiss a few moments later, messily kissing him, wrapping his legs tighter around him.

Shiro broke the kiss a few moments later, pressing open mouthed kisses down his neck, Lance tilting his head for him, cupping the back of his head and stroking over his hair, giving a soft gasp when Shiro gently bit down.

“Harder…” He moaned softly, stroking the nape of his neck and Shiro briefly considered when Lance had told him not to leave a mark.

“Can I-?” He asked and Lance nodded quickly, moaning as Shiro bit down a little harder, sucking at the skin.

Lance’s hands roamed over Shiro’s back as he thrust into him, pace steady, and not too rough, just enough to have Lance squirming and moaning prettily beneath him, own hands sliding down Lance’s sides and gripping his hips. 

Shiro pulled up a little once he had worked a nice mark into the curve of Lance’s neck and Lance pulled him back against him, nipping at his lips and panting into his mouth, before resting their foreheads together, rocking his hips a little in an encouraging way.

Shiro picked up the pace a little, groaning softly and pulling Lance against him by his hips, grinding his cock into Lance’s prostate and Lance whimpered, hips bucking with a soft cry.

Shiro made an effort to aim there with most of his thrusts, reaching down to wrap a hand around Lance’s cock, knowing that neither of them were going to last much longer. 

Lance was steadily rocking his hips, caught between rocking back against Shiro’s cock and pushing his own into Shiro’s hand, a small stream of whines and mewls spilling from his lips, Shiro groaning against him as Lance tightened around him.

“Shiro- Shiro, please…” Lance whimpered, gasping softly as Shiro worked his hand over his cock, carefully aiming his thrusts and drinking in all of Lance’s noises, each of his movements, knowing that he wasn’t going to get this again.

Shiro pressed their lips back together, trying to bury that thought away, because it wasn’t a nice one. He wanted to stay here wrapped up in Lance for as long as he possibly could. He wanted to have him waiting for him when he got back. He didn’t want to never have this again, didn’t want to never have him again. 

Shiro fucked into him harder, tongue sliding against Lance’s in his mouth, not fighting, just exploring and tasting and devouring, because Shiro wanted to memorise every second of this. He didn’t want to cum yet, didn’t want it to be over, because then Lance would leave, like he always did. Shiro didn’t want Lance to leave. Not this time.

He fucked into him quickly, Lance panting harshly into Shiro’s mouth, arching off of the bed, hips bucking with each of his touches, cock weeping over his hand, hole clenching around him and Shiro knew that he was close- Lance didn’t need to warn him.

He came barely a few thrusts later, crying out so prettily, arching off of the bed and into Shiro, gasping and panting, body shaking a little as Shiro worked him through it, kept driving his cock into him through it, knowing that there was no way he could draw this out for any longer, not with Lance clenching around him like that. Not with Lance arching into him, desperately clinging to him and kissing him like he was dying for it.

Shiro groaned into Lance’s mouth as he came, thrusting into him deeply and spilling into him, grinding his cock against him as he rode out his orgasm, before slowing his movements, hand slipping under the small of Lance’s back, holding him close as they panted together.

They stayed like that for a few moments, before Shiro carefully slipped his softening cock out of Lance, heaving a sigh as he knew he couldn’t prolong this any more, rolling over onto the bed next to him onto his back, chest heaving as he caught his breath.

Lance laid next to him for a few moments, like he always did. Shiro kept his eyes averted, flinching in surprise as he felt Lance curl his body around Shiro’s. 

He slid a leg between Shiro’s and laid his head on his chest, wrapping an arm around his waist, breathing uneven and harsh as he came down from it.

Lance had said that he didn’t do cuddling after sex. But then again, Lance had done a lot of things today that he didn’t usually do; he’d let Shiro mark him, he’d kissed him pretty much non stop, too. They’d been close the whole time in a way that they hadn’t been close before and Shiro couldn’t bare to dwell on it.

Because like it or not, Shiro had caught feelings. The one thing you should never do in a no strings attached hooking up situation and he’d gone and done it. 

He couldn’t tell half the time if they were just the very intense platonic feelings that came with everything they’d been through together, like he shared with all of the paladins. Those, with the added intense attraction and now sexual experience together. If maybe those lines were blurring, because Shiro didn’t know if it was _romantic_ , per se. 

He didn’t know if what he was feeling was a crush. Or just the overwhelming love he already felt, with the added attraction and sex. 

He just knew that he wanted to be able to keep having Lance like this, keep holding Lance like this. He didn’t want him to go, and that he would miss him. A lot.

And the sad thing was that Shiro was sure that if he asked Lance now to reconsider… to come with them, that there would be a chance of him saying yes. 

But he couldn’t.

He couldn’t ask again. He couldn’t risk that. He’d asked him what- three times now? Lance had said no each time. Yes… maybe his odds were improved but if Shiro asked again and Lance said no again… He didn’t want to know what that would do to their friendship. If Lance cottoned on to Shiro’s feelings… 

He’d made it clear from the start he wasn’t interested in something like that. Even on their date that Lance probably hadn’t considered a date, he’d made sure to reinforce the sexual side of things while they were out, because that was all this was.

Sex. 

Two friends. Good friends. Great friends who’d been to hell and back together and come out the other side. Two friends who loved each other immensely and clearly shared an attraction, fooling around. Nothing more and nothing less. Shiro was not going to try and fool himself, especially not when they were due to leave this very afternoon.

So Shiro kept quiet, he didn’t ask again, he didn’t say anything at all. Afraid that even a word might break the atmosphere and that Lance would leave. He was clearly scared of something. Scared of being vulnerable, maybe, scared of opening himself up. 

That didn’t seem like a Lance thing on the surface, but Shiro considered it deeply, and he supposed, that underneath surface-Lance, that was really, a very Lance thing to do. 

He just lay there, holding Lance in his arms, gently stroking the skin on his hip and he was half concerned (hoping) that Lance had fallen asleep, but he could see the movement of his eyelashes with each blink of his eyes, and his breathing hadn’t evened to that of slumber, yet. 

What he wouldn’t have given to have known what Lance was thinking about. 

Shiro wasn’t sure how long they laid there for, but Lance suddenly sat up, disentangling himself from Shiro and getting up, gathering his clothes up and putting them on, not stopping for a shower like he usually did.

Shiro still didn’t say anything, unsure of what to say.

“I um.” Lance said, voice a little raspy, turning to him, once he was dressed. “Have a safe trip.” He settled on after a few moments.

“Thank you.” Shiro said softly back, brows pinched into a frown as Lance lingered in the doorway looking back at him.

He didn’t know if Lance was waiting for him to say something else, or if he himself was debating saying something else, but Shiro didn’t know why he felt so choked for words around Lance lately. Like the whole situation was so delicate that it would be shattered if he said the wrong thing.

He probably wasn’t giving Lance enough credit, but that didn’t help him figure out what to say. He’d never been in a situation like this before, and everything he wanted to say, he knew he couldn’t. 

Lance looked at him for a few more moments, biting his lip and then turning in the doorway, and letting it click closed behind him.

Shiro blew out a long breath, biting his lip and raking a hand through his hair, sighing. 

That was the last time he was going to see Lance for four (six) months. And that was okay. That was fine. That was plenty time to get over this stupid crush that was quite honestly, ruining his life right now. 

Shiro sighed, getting up and heading into the bathroom to wash off quickly, before pulling his clothes back on. He sighed, reluctantly leaving his room and wandering about the Atlas for a bit.

He didn’t really feel like going back out to the Garrison and socialising. He might see Lance again.

That was probably bad, for a Captain, to disappear for hours upon hours just before the launch, but… Shiro was only human too, and people tended to forget that. He didn’t want to be around anyone, he didn’t know how he felt, and he didn’t want to think about it.

He sat around in one of the common rooms for a bit, before the crew started piling back onto the ship and before Shiro knew it they were headed back into space and away from Earth. 

He gave a small sigh of relief at that. Finally, he could get back on with things and get them back to how they were before he found Lance’s porn. Before he became sex obsessed and started thinking solely with his cock.

Things would be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaaaah i dont even,,,, know what to say im just so excited to finally have this out even if its only the first part !!!!!!!  
> next part should be coming next week and then the third the week after that so stay tuned 
> 
>  
> 
> comments are so greatly appreciated dfjfdjfdjk <3
> 
> you can [follow me on twitter here](https://twitter.com/thatsforme2know) I go on a lot about this fic lmao but also anything else I’m writing, and I rt a lot of Shance shit too <3


	2. Chapter 2

It was five weeks before they got near enough to a planet to get a wifi connection, and Shiro had been doing well, he’d been making progress. He hadn’t let himself watch any of Lance’s videos, settling for other stuff he’d downloaded over time, and though he hadn’t quite let himself delete them yet, they remained unwatched in his history.

Things had pretty much gone back to normal, and Shiro was starting to think that he’d been overestimating his feelings in the first place.

Lance was his friend. Just in the same way that Keith was his friend and Matt was his friend and Pidge was his friend and Hunk was his friend.

Just because he and Lance were attracted to each other and had fooled around a little, didn’t mean that it meant anything more than that. 

Shiro was well and truly getting over it. He had nothing but affectionate and positive thoughts about him. But that was all. 

Shiro was okay. It had been a brief lapse in judgement, maybe, a brief oversight in his feelings, but he was fine. Really, he was.

Until he saw Lance online on his tablet. 

It had… been five weeks now since they’d last spoken, and Shiro had all but forgotten that Lance had asked him to call. Made him _promise_ to call. 

His breath caught in his throat and he felt butterflies in a way that he hadn’t for a while. Anxious butterflies, not the nice fluttery ones.

Maybe if he called Lance right away then that would seem too eager. But then again, Shiro hadn’t really been on his tablet for the last few days, and maybe Lance had been online the whole time and would be offended.

No, Lance could have called _him._

Shiro would wait. He’d wait to call, no matter how much he wanted to call him now, even if he was nervous.

Lance was his friend. There was no reason to feel nervous. He wouldn’t feel nervous if it was Keith or Pidge on the other end. So why did he now? Because he had thought he’d caught feelings? Because he’d been so confused? Because he’d thought entirely with his dick regarding Lance for _weeks_ before they even started hooking up?

No, Shiro would wait. At least until the following evening. Just to be sure, just in _case_ , no other reason. 

However, something that hadn’t crossed Shiro’s mind yet, and that didn’t until he was tucked up in bed that night ready to (but not able to) sleep, was the videos.

If they were back on the internet then Shiro could look up Lance’s page. Maybe- _their_ video would be on there. 

He couldn’t not look after that. He loaded his tablet back up, looking up Lance’s page and waiting for it to load. 

There were three new videos, and that made Shiro frown despite himself.

The first was clearly his and Lance’s, and he waited- he _made_ himself wait to click on it, despite how his thumb was hovering over the thumbnail. The second, Shiro couldn’t tell yet, but it looked to be a solo video. Just Lance masturbating. He didn’t have one of those on his page yet. The third was a blowjob scene, an alien that was a relatively similar size to Shiro.

He blew out a breath, clicking on that one first. This was just to know- just out of curiosity. Shiro wasn’t going to touch himself.

He watched as the video loaded, it was a side view this time, dissimilar to Shiro’s favourite blowjob video which was first person view. 

The video started with Lance lightly stroking the cock in his hand, smirking up at the alien and occasionally flicking his gaze to the camera, teasing the tip with his tongue before taking it into his mouth.

That mouth that had been so wet and tight and warm around his own cock- that he’d had the pleasure of experiencing multiple times, not just a quick lay like these aliens were. At least Shiro had something on them.

The video continued much like that, Lance teasing and sucking, and the top wasn’t nearly as rough with him as Shiro knew Lance liked, didn’t take advantage of that mouth and fuck right into it, didn’t make Lance take it like he was born to do, like Shiro _knew_ he could.

The alien came on Lance’s face, a nice full cumshot, cum landing on his face in thick ropes, Lance moaning as he eagerly took it, licking his lips. 

He giggled, turning to the camera and sticking his tongue out, giving a wink and reaching to turn it off. 

Shiro blew out a long breath, clicking off of the video. His cock was hard in his pants, he knew that, but he was doing his best to ignore it. That hadn’t been Lance’s best work, really.

No, screw that. Lance’s work was always immensely hot and impeccably good. It was the _alien_ who didn’t treat him right, didn’t ram his cock into his throat like he _meant_ it, make tears stream down Lance’s face, make him moan like it was all he wanted- like he was dying and he hadn’t eaten for months and all the could think about was having a nice thick cock shoved down his throat.

Shiro whined, crossing one leg over the other. He didn’t know why he thought that remembering all of that would be a good idea. 

He was over Lance. He was fine. He had never really been into Lance like that in the first place. Just physically and that’s what messed him up; he didn’t need to remember that.

He clicked on the next video anyway. It was short. Just Lance, alone in his room, a little darker than his videos usually were.

It felt more intimate than anything Shiro had seen from Lance before, more intimate even than some of the time’s they’d had sex. 

It was soft, somehow; wasn’t Lance taking a massive cock, wasn’t anything rough, Lance wasn’t even fingering himself. Just stroking his cock and making cute little moaning noises as he worked his hand over himself. 

They weren’t over the top and they weren’t exaggerated, less like he was filming a porn video and more like he was just masturbating.

The video was only a few minutes long, Lance not taking long to cum under his own touch, knowing exactly how to work himself to completion, whining as he came, cum spattering over his abdomen.

Shiro watched it again. 

It wasn’t something that made him want to touch himself, even, no matter how hard and aching his cock was. Just something that made him miss Lance, really. 

He closed it after that, hovering over the thumbnail after their own video, hesitating to watch it. 

In the end his curiosity won out - he’d never seen himself having sex before, of course, and he really wanted to. He wanted to remember how Lance looked and felt stretched around him, too.

If he finally got his cock out of his underwear then that was his business. If he stroked it quickly in time with his thrusts, trying to recall Lance’s tight heat stretched around his cock in a way that Shiro’s own hand could never hope to replicate, then that was his business.

If he came in time with Lance in the video, moaning out Lance’s name, then that was his business. 

It didn’t need to mean anything. And here he was again; it didn’t need to mean anything. Wasn’t that what he’d told himself the first time around?

He sighed, switching off his tablet and putting it on the side. Maybe calling Lance could wait another day.

He cleaned himself up and curled onto his side, pulling the pillow from the other side of the bed against his chest and burying his face in it.

He didn’t like feeling things. It wasn’t fun. Especially when he couldn’t make heads or tails of it. 

It took Shiro a while to fall asleep that night.

 

***

 

Shiro gave in, and did end up calling Lance the following evening, anxiously waiting as it rang and it rang and he was worried for a moment that Lance wouldn’t pick up.

He had asked him to call. Made Shiro _promise_. 

He picked up on the fifth or so ring, coming into frame on Shiro’s tablet with a warm smile.

“Shiro.” He said. “Hey.”

“Hey.” Shiro said softly back, biting his lip, smiling as he saw him.

“How’ve you been? It’s been what- five weeks now?” He asked, moving to sit down and propping his own tablet up, resting his chin in his hand as he smiled at him.

“Yeah, it’s been… a while.” He smiled, brushing a hand through his hair. “We just got connected.”

“Oh yeah?” Lance asked. “I can’t imagine five weeks with no internet. I know that must sound ridiculous, considering we went like, the whole war and shit. But you get used to it again, you know?”

Shiro hummed and nodded. “Yeah, I do.” He agreed. “It’s hard, but I download things before we go, so it’s less of a transition. Phone calls though, can’t be downloaded.”

“Mm, I could always film you some video messages.” Lance said with a teasing wink and Shiro laughed.

“You know, I think I already have some of your uh, video messages downloaded.” He said and Lance’s lips parted in a soft gasp.

“How could I forget?” He asked with a grin. “Did you get to watch ours yet?”

Shiro made a non committal noise. “Maybe.”

“That means yesssss.” Lance said with a giggle.

Shiro rolled his eyes. “It means maybe I did.”

“Did you watch the othersss?” 

“Mm.” Shiro said with a shrug.

“Shiroooooo.” Lance pouted and really, how was Shiro supposed to say no to that face?

“I liked the one of just you.” He said, folding his arms across his chest sulkily.

“You did? I was worried about it, it’s different. But it seems to be doing okay, so far.” He said with a hum. “Ours is doing good, though. Aliens are really liking that human on human action.”

Shiro snorted. “Oh I’m sure.” 

“Mmmhm. I’m surprised no one’s commented that it’s us, yet. We’re kind of easily recognisable.”

“I hadn’t thought of that.” Shiro said with a frown and Lance bit his lip.

“Do you… want me to take it down?” He asked.

Shiro shook his head. “No, no, don’t worry. I wouldn’t have agreed to film it if I wasn’t aware of the risks, Lance.”

Lance nodded. “Okay. Just uh, let me know if you do, though.”

“I will.” Shiro nodded, giving him a small smile. “So how’ve you been then? How was your family?”

Lance smiled softly at him. “They were good. Tried to get me to stay longer, but, I had things to do, you know? I love them and I love being at home but after everything I just… I can only handle so much of it. If I wanted to be a farmer I wouldn’t have signed up to the Garrison. So I stayed a few extra days and got back out and I’ve been good. Sort of, flitting around here and there, exploring. It’s been good.”

“I’m glad to hear that.” Shiro smiled, nodding. “I totally know what you mean. I feel like… when we didn’t have a choice all we could think about was getting back home but then when we got there we remembered why we signed up for the Garrison in the first place; why we wanted to be out here.”

Lance smiled fondly at that. “Yeah. It’s really good being able to just… fuck around in space, I guess.”

Shiro laughed. “Yeah. Fucking around in space is _really good_.”

“What about you, then, Captain?” He asked with a grin. “On schedule?”

“So far yes, surprisingly.” Shiro said with a soft laugh. “But I’m sure we’ll make a few stops longer than we should. We always seem to. But we’ve been doing good.”

“That’s good.” Lance said with a hum, yawning.

“What time is it for you? Have I caught you at a bad time?”

Lance hummed, glancing off the screen. “Mm, it’s not too bad. I’ve got it at about one? But I’m gonna need to sync it again.”

“That’s not good, we’re at ten, here. I should let you get some sleep.”

Lance huffed, but gave in as he yawned again. “Okay. Don’t be a stranger though, alright? How long are you gonna be connected for?”

“Mm, a week, maybe? Then we’re moving again so we’ll have another few black weeks and then we’ll be back. Might be closer to you though, so our times’ll match a little better.”

“Fingers crossed. You could be going in the other direction though and make it worse.”

Shiro laughed. “That’s true. I’ll keep my fingers crossed, too.”

“Call again before then though, okay? It’s nice to talk to someone I actually know.”

“Yeah, I will. You can call too, okay?”

“I don’t want to catch you in the middle of important captain business.” He said with a concerned frown, but Shiro waved him off.

“I think nine times out of ten I’d be glad for an excuse to have a quick break.”

Lance laughed. “Okay, well I’ll call then.”

“Okay. Sleep well, Lance.” He said and Lance yawned again, smiling softly.

“Yeah, you too.” He said, before ending the call. 

He looked at the blank screen for a few moments with a soft smile before setting it on his bedside table.

Shiro hummed, padding into his bathroom and putting the plug in the bath. He was ever grateful since they’d fitted his bathroom out with a bath, sinking into it once it was ready with a soft sigh.

He didn’t know what he’d been so anxious about. Talking to Lance had been nice, and it had felt normal. 

 

***

 

They talked on the phone twice more before it happened. Two more normal friendly phone calls that Shiro might have a similar one with Hunk, for example.

‘It’, being what Shiro had been trying to avoid desperately. He’d been good, he hadn’t watched any more of the videos, he hadn’t thought about Lance, and things had been _normal_. They’d been _good_.

He’d called Lance. Just like he had before. And Lance had answered. Naked.

“Oh… hi.” Shiro said, biting his lip with a frown. 

“Hey, sorry, I just got out the shower.” Lance explained, grabbing up his tablet and flopping down onto the bed with it. 

“Oh, right.” Shiro said in understanding, nodding. Was Lance not going to put something on? 

“So how’s your daaaaay been?” He asked with a smile.

“It’s um, it’s been okay. Bit stressful.” He said with a shrug, not sure where to look.

It wasn’t that he didn’t want to look, because by god, he did. But Shiro was trying to distance himself from those thoughts, because they’d been heading down a path that he wasn’t ready to go down, and he knew that Lance sure as hell wasn’t ready either.

Lance frowned at that. “That doesn’t sound good, why was it stressful?”

Shiro sighed, running a hand through his hair. “It doesn’t matter, it was just a lot, you know? I’m glad to be off duty, at least.”

Lance smiled. “Yeah, I can imagine.” He said and then his smiled turned more coy. “You know what they say is good for stress though…”

Shiro furrowed his brows as he looked at Lance. “What…?” 

Lance rolled his eyes and giggled. “ _Orgasms_.” He said in an exaggerated whisper with another giggle. 

“Ah.” Shiro said, rolling his eyes back at him. 

Lance shrugged. “I’m just saying.”

“Would you like me to hang up then?” Shiro asked, raising an eyebrow and Lance bit his lip.

“Why would you have to hang up…? He asked.

Shiro looked at him for a moment.

“It’s not like it’s something I haven’t seen before…” He said teasingly. “I have photographic evidence.”

Shiro pursed his lips with a sigh. “Well, that’s true.”

“You did say you liked my solo video…” Lance said with a pout. “I could give you a private show.” He offered teasingly.

How was Shiro supposed to refuse that? Who in their right mind could refuse that? It wasn’t his fault, he couldn’t be blamed, not really…

It must have shown on his face because then Lance was grinning.

“Do you like that idea, Shiro…?” He asked, tilting his head and wetting his lip and Shiro would be lying if he said he didn’t track the movement.

“I- um-” He said, swallowing thickly. 

Lance grinned, moving the camera down a little to show off more of his chest and Shiro drank in every moment of it.

“I won’t be offended if you don’t want to, Shiro…” Lance murmured, moving the camera down a little more so that Shiro could see the v of his hips and Shiro could tell that Lance hadn’t dried off before answering the call, as his skin was covered in water droplets and Shiro wanted nothing more than to lick them off.

“We…”

“We what, baby?” He asked and Shiro had to swallow a whine. Lance calling him baby _always_ got him.

“We shouldn’t…”

“Why, baby?” He asked and Shiro knew that Lance knew exactly what he was doing.

“Because…”

“Because what? Is it such a bad thing…? One more time isn’t gonna hurt anyone, Shiro…” Lance said, moving the camera up to his face and giving him a teasing pout.

“Lance…” Shiro said, biting his lip.

“Okay.” Lance said softly, but seriously, sitting up.

Shiro held his resolve for all of four seconds when faced with the fact that Lance would actually _let_ him say no. _Of course_ Lance would let him say no. 

He heaved a heavy sigh. “Lance… I want you. You know I want to.”

Lance bit his lip. “Talk to me.”

Shiro didn’t know what to say. “I just... “ He sighed. “Thought it would probably be for the best if we didn’t continue… our um…”

“Dalliance?” Lance offered with a grin and Shiro laughed softly.

“That works.” Shiro said.

“Okay... “ Lance said. “Can’t say I understand that reasoning, buuuut. If that’s what you want then that’s chill, don’t worry about it. There are other ways to destress, you could have a bath, or a nap, or I could tell you some stupid story that’ll make you laugh.”

“Or you could fuck yourself open for me.” Shiro said, having to hold back a laugh at how Lance’s eyes comically widened.

“O-oh. Yeah. I could uh, I could do that. Do you want me to do that?”

“Yeah.”

“Are you sure?” Lance asked seriously.

“Please, Lance. I want to watch you. I want to watch you fuck yourself, just for me.”

Lance swallowed and nodded, shifting and propping his tablet up on his bedside table. 

“I thought about you, you know.” He said, opening his drawer to get some lube out. “In that video.”

Shiro swallowed thickly, watching him. “You did?”

“Uh huh.” Lance said, laying down and spreading his legs, looking at him. “Is this angle okay?”

“Yeah.” Shiro said through a soft moan as Lance spread his legs for him. God, he wanted to bury his tongue inside of him again, make him sob for him. “It’s great.”

“That’s good. You watching?” He asked as he uncapped the lube, coating his fingers and bringing them between his legs. 

“Couldn’t not be.” Shiro said softly, biting his lip as he watched him, bringing a hand down to grip himself through his pants. 

Lance hummed, pushing a finger into himself with a soft moan, glancing at the camera. Shiro swallowed, gripping himself a little tighter, keeping his gaze fixed on Lance’s hand.

“I think about you.” He moaned softly as he began to thrust his finger into himself. “When I’m by myself…”

Shiro groaned softly, pulling his pants down so that he could pull his cock out. “Why? I can’t be the best you’ve had.”

Lance hummed. “Cause you’re you, baby. Cause I used to have a poster of you on my wall when I was fifteen, and sometimes I’d touch myself and think about you then, too, and I didn’t even you.”

Shiro moaned at that, hand squeezing around his cock as he wrapped it around himself. “Fuck.” He cursed softly.

“Cause you used to be my hero… ‘cause you’re my friend, cause I trust you… ‘cause I used to think about your cock when I didn’t know you, when I did, in Voltron… and then I got to have you and fuck, you were so good, baby, everything I thought you’d be.” He moaned, sinking a second finger into himself.

“Fuck, Lance…” Shiro groaned. Lance couldn’t possibly know what the things he was saying were doing to him. He didn’t think he’d ever heard something so hot in his life.

“Uh huh… Wish we could’ve got to do more, though… had so many fantasies, wanted to do so many things with you, baby, wanted you so many different ways… still think about you…” He groaned, fucking himself quickly with his fingers.

Shiro whined softly, moaning. “I- fuck, Lance, I wanna do it all with you, wanna do everything you ever thought about doing.” He moaned, working his hand over his cock quickly as he watched Lance.

“Y-yeah? T-thought you didn’t want me anymore…” He whined, keening softly and arching off of the bed as he hit into his prostate.

“I always want you, Lance, fuck, I always want you so bad…” Shiro admitted as he jerked himself off, eyes trained on where Lance’s fingers were disappearing into himself and wishing that the screen was bigger and that the video quality was better.

“You mean it…?” Lance asked through a moan, spreading his fingers inside of himself, bringing his other hand to splay on his abdomen. 

“I mean it, fuck.” Shiro nodded quickly. “I want you. Wanna fuck you.”

Lance whined at that. “Want your cock, baby, please, want it so bad, want you inside me, want your hand on me, fuck… can I touch myself?” He asked.

“Yeah, please, baby, touch your pretty cock for me.” Shiro moaned softly bucking into his own hand as he watched Lance get a hand on his cock, quickly working himself with a breathless moan as he fucked his fingers into himself, other hand quickly jerking himself off.

“Fuck…” He whimpered, biting down on his lip and Shiro could barely see from how he was lying, but he could just see his brows pinched and lips parted as he moaned. 

“Add another finger, baby.” Shiro instructed and Lance did as he was told, sinking a third finger into himself, easily slipping in beside the first two. “Good boy.”

Lance whimpered at that, rocking his hips a little, shifting and keeping up the fast pace, before jerking and giving a soft gasp as he hit into his prostate again. 

“Do that again.” Shiro said and Lance whimpered, crying out as he did as he was told, unrelenting as his thighs began to shake a little. 

“S-Shiro-” He gasped.

“Keep going.” Shiro instructed, raking his eyes over Lance’s form, his shaking thighs, precum beading at the tip of his cock and Lance slowing the hand there as he continued to rub over his prostate.

“Shiro-” He gasped. “Shiro, ‘m gonna cum-” He whimpered.

“Cum then.” Shiro said, working his own cock quickly, listening to Lance’s little desperate mewls as he worked himself. 

It was a only a few moments before Lance did as he was told and came, back arching off of the bed and moaning, cum spattering over his abdomen, working himself through it.

“Fuck, that’s it, baby.” Shiro groaned, picking up the pace on his own cock as Lance panted on the bed. 

He sat up, pulling his fingers from inside of him and biting his lip, looking at the camera, running his fingertips over his chest, coating them in cum before bringing them to his lips, looking Shiro in the eye as he carefully licked each of them clean. 

“Oh _fuck_.” Shiro groaned, hips bucking up into his touch and Lance smirked. 

“You close for me, baby?” Lance asked, biting his lip teasingly. “You wanna fuck that gorgeous cock into me?” He asked, spreading his legs again. “I opened myself up just for you, baby, just for your cock.”

Shiro groaned, feeling himself getting closer with each of Lance’s words. 

“Just for you to fuck me, baby, fuck me hard, just for you to cum in me, make a mess of me.” Lance said with a soft moan, gathering more cum on his fingertips to lick off. “Please, Shiro… please, I wanna see you cum, I want it, I wanna swallow it all, want it inside me.”

“Fuck, Lance…” Shiro groaned, precum leaking heavily from his cock. “Lance, Lance-” He groaned, bucking up into his hand, groaning as he spilled over himself, working himself through it. 

Lance groaned softly as he watched Shiro cum, biting his lip and keeping his eyes fixed on him. Shiro panted softly, meeting his gaze a few moments later with a lopsided smile. 

“You good?” Lance asked with a soft smile and Shiro nodded. “Less stressed?”

“Yeah, thanks.” Shiro said with a nod. 

“My pleasure.” Lance said with a wink and then a small giggle. 

Shiro laughed softly. “Oh, I’m sure.” He agreed. 

Lance laughed with him and then pouted. “You got me all dirty again, now I gotta get back in the shower.”

Shiro rolled his eyes. “You offered, excuse you.”

“Mm, true.” Lance hummed. “You should fuck me in the shower.” He mused and Shiro swallowed.

“That um- yes. That sounds- dangerous, but-”

“Worth the risk?” Lance asked with a knowing grin.

“Well…” Shiro tried to reason with himself. 

“Mmmmhm, I know your game, Shirogane.” Lance teased. 

Shiro rolled his eyes, a smile playing at his lips. “Fine, yes, arguably, it would be worth the risk.”

“Is that a promise, Captain?” He asked.

Shiro looked at him for a long moment, lips pursed. “We’ll see.”

Lance pouted. “Give me more than thaaaat.” 

Shiro smiled a little wider and shook his head. “It’s a we’ll see.” 

As if Shiro would be able to resist. Lance should know that by now, anyway. 

“I’ll take it.” Lance grinned. “You ready to go to sleep or you wanna stay on a while?” He asked with a hum.

“Mm, maybe a little.” Shiro said, leaning back against the bed and watching Lance with a soft smile, only now remembering to get a tissue to clean himself up with.

“Okay, come with me to the bathroom.” Lance hummed, picking the tablet up and carrying it into the bathroom. 

Shiro narrowed his eyes. “That’s not… your ship.” 

Lance giggled. “No, I’m in a hotel.”

“Oh. Why are you in a hotel?” Shiro asked, tilting his head. “Is your ship okay?”

“Mmhm, it’s fine. I had an engagement here earlier, and the room was booked so I figured I’d use it. They have a nice bath here, it has jets and everything.”

“I thought you used the shower.” Shiro said, raising an eyebrow.

Lance rolled his eyes. “Yeah, but that doesn’t mean I wasn’t gonna use the bath as well.”

“Engagement?” Shiro asked after a few moments, realising what Lance had said. 

“Mmmmhm. I’ve got some editing to do tomorrow.”

Oh, that type of engagement. Not that Shiro was too surprised. 

“You film pretty regularly.” Shiro observed and Lance raised an eyebrow, quirking his lip. 

“Are you calling me a slut?”

“I- no? I just meant-”

Lance snorted. “I’m kidding. But yeah, sure. I mean, I get quite a lot of views so the pay’s okay, and my uh… lifestyle is kinda costly. And sue me, I like sex, I’m a slut.” He said with a teasing grin. 

Shiro rolled his eyes. “Well, can’t argue with that, then.” He said and Lance gave a mock gasp. 

“Shiro, you should only call someone a slut when you’re in bed with them.” He pouted. 

“Mhm, are you into that?” 

“Well, wouldn’t you like to know?” Lance said with a coy smile. 

“Yes, that’s why I asked.” Shiro said, raising an eyebrow. 

Lance huffed and rolled his eyes. “I think you’d be hard pushed to find something that I’m _not_ into.” 

“Mm, good to know.” Shiro said with a hum. 

“Mmmhm, you can file that away for later.” He said with a wink and Shiro laughed.

“Oh, I will.” He assured him and Lance giggled. 

“Good, I’ll hold you to it.” 

“You’d better.” 

Lance grinned at him, setting him down on the bathroom side. “I gotta spend a bit of time putting cream on my face, so it might not be the most riveting content.”

“Is that an invitation to leave?” Shiro asked with a smile.

“Mm, it’s an excuse to leave if you don’t want to watch me put cream on my face for fifteen minutes.”

Shiro laughed. “Well, I think I can handle it.”

Lance laughed and nodded. “Okay then.” He said, unzipping his bag and began to get his things out.

Shiro watched with a fond smile as Lance put various creams on his face and washed them off, explaining what each one was for as he went. 

Eventually, Lance sank into the bath with a face mask on, having moved the tablet a little to a new angle. 

“Are you tired?” Lance asked after Shiro yawned for the third time. “Shit, what time is it for you? Are we still at three hours?”

“Mm, it’s about twelve here, so I can’t possibly imagine what time it is for you or how you’re so sprightly.”

Lance laughed. “Well, I have a nice big comfy bed to sleep in and I can lie in as much as I want tomorrow.”

Shiro made a small noise in the back of his throat at that. “Gosh, I wish that were me.”

Lance gave him a flirtatious smile. “There’s room enough for you too, Captain. I wish you were spending the night.”

Shiro blew out a breath. “Don’t turn me on again.” He said with a raised eyebrow. 

“Oh, right, sorry I forgot, you’re old now so you can’t get it back up.”

Shiro glared at him. “That is not true.”

“No?” 

“No.”

“Then get it back up.” Lance challenged. 

“I’m not going again, I’m tired.” Shiro said firmly. “But one of these days I’m sure I can prove it to you.”

“Is that a promise?”

“Yes.” Shiro agreed this time and Lance smiled. 

“Good, cause next time I see you in person? I’m gonna make you cum again and again and _again_.” 

Shiro shuddered, swallowing. “And that, is _that_ a promise?”

“You can count on it, baby.” Lance grinned, biting his lip teasingly.

Shiro groaned softly, frowning in frustration. “You’re a menace.”

“You like me being a menace.”

“I hate that I do.” Shiro agreed. 

“Mmm, well, I suppose if I _must_ let you get some rest, then I suppose I must.” He said with an exaggerated sigh. 

“Thanks.” Shiro said with a huff, smiling at him. 

“I’m moving tomorrow, so I’ll be MIA for a few days. You gonna be around still?”

Shiro hummed. “Depends how long it takes you to get there. We’re due to be moving in the next few days, too.”

Lance pouted. “How long?”

“Few weeks till our next stop.” He said with a hum 

“Well, if we don’t get to talk again before then, I hope you have a safe trip.”

Shiro smiled softly. “Thank you. You too. Take care of yourself, okay?”

“Mmhm. You too, Shiro. And I’ll try to upload before I go tomorrow so you can see the new video.” He added with a grin and Shiro laughed.

“That’s very kind of you, my dick greatly appreciates it.”

“You’re very welcome.” Lance giggled. “Have sweet dreams, okay?”

“I’ll try my very hardest. You have sweet dreams too.”

Lance smiled softly. “Okay, talk to you soon, Shiro.” 

Shiro smiled softly back, lifting his hand to hover over the end call button. “Yeah, talk soon. Bye.” He said, ending the call and sighing.

He put his tablet down and got under the covers, switching his lamp off and curling up in bed, closing his eyes, not taking him long to fall asleep.

 

***

 

Lance was true to his word, uploading the video the next morning, and Shiro downloaded it that evening, having at least enough self control to get through the day. He was curious though as to what it would be. 

He managed to put it from his mind as they went about their day, Shiro leading a few successful meetings and they made considerable headway. He was feeling pretty tired by the time he settled into his room that evening, and really, Lance had been right; orgasms _were_ good for stress. 

He wasn’t exactly stressed, per se, today had been a relatively productive day, however a nice orgasm wouldn’t go amiss. 

He tidied some things away, changing into some more comfortable clothes and locking his door for the night, loading up Lance’s page and pressing download on the thumbnail before he even clicked on it. He knew he’d be watching it again. 

Shiro hummed as the video loaded, immediately recognising the hotel room that Lance had been staying in the previous night. 

Lance was laid out on the bed, already naked, looking up at the camera, which was being held by someone, not on a stand, this time.

Lance bit down on his lip seductively, breathing a soft moan as an alien came into shot, running his hands over Lance’s legs. 

Shiro furrowed his brows for a moment before realising what was going on. If the camera was being held, and the alien was in shot with both hands, then unless the alien had some weird hidden appendages (which at this point, wouldn’t surprise Shiro), meant that there was a third party in the room with them.

Shiro knew that Lance must have had some sort of exhibitionistic streak to be filming and uploading porn videos in the first place. But having someone else in the room too was… doing things to him that Shiro hadn’t realised it would. 

Shiro wasn’t into that, was he? Shiro was just into everything that Lance did - he was just into _Lance_. 

He wasn’t going to lie to himself, though, the thought of someone else watching Lance, maybe even joining in- two pairs of hands on him, making him writhe and moan- well, Shiro’s cock was already fully hard in his pants, and that was all he was willing to say on the matter.

That could be a thought visited another day, as nothing about the video suggested that there was going to be a threesome, just that they had a videographer. 

Shiro shook his head, focusing his thoughts back on the video, where the alien was running his hands over Lance’s body, fingertips light and smooth as they danced over Lance’s skin, nipples pebbling under his touch, Lance giving a breathless moan as they were tugged and pulled at, face contorting in pleasure. 

Shiro bit his lip as the camera angle changed, showing the alien smoothing his hands over Lance’s thighs, before pushing them roughly apart and earning a light squeak from Lance, almost too soft to be audible. 

The next few minutes were a blur of Shiro teasing himself, trying to draw this out, Lance writing on the bed, panting as he was worked up, one hand wrapped around his cock, one finger in his ass (though admittedly a rather thick finger). 

Lance was rocking his hips, biting down on his lip, and cheeks flushed. He looked gorgeous. 

“Please…” He whimpered softly and the alien hummed in deliberation. 

The camera moved in, closing in on his ass as the alien slid a second finger into him, pumping them into his hole, drawing needy gasps and whines from Lance. 

Shiro could tell exactly when and how hard they pressed into his prostate from how Lance cried out, arching on the bed, knees bending and curling in on himself, before the alien used its other arm to push him back down, letting go of his cock as it bobbed against his stomach and Lance whined at the loss.

“Be good.” He said, voice rough and Lance whimpered, nodding. 

The alien hummed after a few moments, not touching his cock again, just working the two fingers into his ass, before pulling them out all together and leaving Lance panting on the bed for a few moments.

The camera panned over his body, flushed, chest heaving and eyes screwed closed, hips gently bucking up, looking for some sort of friction. 

The alien returned a few moments later with a plug, slipping it comfortably into his ass, jewel on the end a bright sparkling blue, a button in the middle that hadn’t been pressed yet. 

Lance moaned softly as he was filled again, frowning with a whine as the alien still didn’t do anything.

“Please…” He begged softly, and the alien gave in (Shiro didn’t blame him), wrapping a hand around Lance’s cock and jerking him slowly off.

Lance’s breathing grew heavier, brows furrowed and lip plumped from how he was biting it, rocking his hips until the alien pressed firmly on his hip in a command to stop, and he did so, keeping his hips firmly against the bed as his cock was pumped.

It was slowly at first, a teasing pace that no wonder Lance had tried to buck up into, hand twisting as it worked his shaft, slowly speeding up, wrist flicking as it got to his head, squeezing around his cock in a way that had Lance gasping, and Shiro could tell it was taking all of his self restraint not to fuck up into the touch.

Slowly he got faster, before he was pumping Lance’s cock quickly, and Lance was whining, desperately struggling to keep his hips on the bed as the alien smoothed his other hand over his abdomen, muscles jumping under his touch. 

“Don’t cum.” He instructed softly, and Lance whimpered, hips bucking a little, to which the alien gave a low warning growl and Lance huffed out a long breath, concentration on his face as he tried his best to keep still, and keep himself from tipping over the edge.

Lance moaned as the alien’s pace on his cock was unrelenting, precum beading at his tip and leaking down his cock. 

“Please…” Lance whimpered, panting. 

“Just a small while longer, little one.” The alien soothed as he worked him, not slowing down or relenting even for a moment, Lance’s cock leaking heavily over the aliens hand. “Shh, I know you can do it.” He soothed as Lance whimpered desperately.

Lance gave a pitiful whimper, eyes screwed closed and lip harshly bitten as he tried to keep himself away from his orgasm as he was so cruelly teased and worked. He kept this up for at least another two minutes before finally giving in.

“Cum for me, little one.” He said and Lance gave a sob of relief, letting himself buck up into the touch whether he was allowed to or not, only taking three strokes of his hand before he came, crying out as his back arched, face screwing up in pleasure.

Lance panted as the alien pumped his cock through his orgasm, keeping it up until Lance was squirming away from the touch, clearly overstimulated. The alien didn’t stop, though, keeping it up, keeping on pumping his cock and at this point, Shiro was barely even remembering to touch himself, just watching each of Lance’s reactions.

He was writhing on the bed under his touch, panting harshly as he tried to squirm away. He kept it up for what must have been a minute, at least, before finally dropping his cock, letting it fall against Lance’s abdomen, as Lance’s chest heaved. 

He gave Lance a few moments to calm down before the shot changed.

Lance was tied up, now, on his back, still, but with his wrists bound above his head, one ankle tied to each of the bed posts towards the lower end of the bed, keeping his legs spread. The camera panned over Lance’s body, and Shiro’s mouth went dry at the chain that connected his nipples, clamping them. 

There was a faint whirring noise that was barely picked up by the camera, which suggested that the plug inside of Lance had since been turned on, and Shiro was willing to bet on that, judging by the blissed out look on Lance’s face. 

They left him like that for a few moments, before the alien got back onto the bed, settling between Lance’s legs and hooking a finger over the chain, lifting it and tugging on it lightly, Lance crying out softly as it pulled on his nipples. 

Lance’s cock had softened now, laying against his thigh, though he was squirming a little on the bed, moaning as the plug must have been shifting inside of him. 

Shiro didn’t know how long it had been in between shots, that Lance had been left like that, but the alien had a few different sized toys laid on the bed next to them. 

He carefully pulled the small plug out, turning it off and Lance gave a small whimper. He picked up the next size up, slicking it with a little lube and pushing it into him, turning on the vibrator, thrusting it into Lance a few times. 

Lance gasped, rocking his hips with a soft moan before the alien pressed his hand to Lance’s hip again, and Lance whined in frustration, keeping his hips still.

“Be good, little one.” He said, voice low and smooth, and Lance shuddered, nodding. 

He fucked Lance with the toy, keeping it slow, insistent on teasing and edging him until he was begging for it. Lance whimpered and writhed under his ministrations, the alien slowly working him up and up until his cock was flushed and hard, curved against his stomach once more. 

He leant up to tug on the chain again, Lance keening softly, cock jumping, and bead of precum leaking from the tip, the the camera zooming in as it pooled against his abdomen. 

The alien finally pulled the toy from him after deciding that Lance was worked up enough, laying the toy down and running his hands over Lance’s body, Lance eagerly arching into the touches, gasping softly and biting down on his lip. 

The alien hummed, lifting his hands and going back to the toy selection, selecting a bigger one this time, ribbed with a tapered head, with significantly more girth than the last, more like a real cock, but still with the vibration feature.

He slicked it, turning it on and slowly easing it into him, and Shiro supposed they must have done more prep between takes because Lance was taking it so nicely, so _easily_ , moaning gratefully with every inch that slipped into him. 

Lance groaned as he slid it in the rest of the way, seated fully inside of him, panting as it was shallowly fucked into him, barely pulling any of the length out before pushing it back in. 

Lance was already so pent up from the treatment before, cock looking almost painfully hard as he was fucked with the toy, made to keep still, trying not to writhe on the bed.

He was worked up and up, being fucked quickly and roughly until he was gasping for air, before being slowed right down, the toy teasingly being dragged out of him, each rib of the toy catching on his rim as the videographer moved closer in, Shiro ever grateful that they had a cameraman, not just on a tripod.

Maybe, if Lance wanted to film another video with Shiro, they could have someone film them, move around to capture the best angles, zooming in in all the right places. He swallowed thickly at that thought. 

“Don’t cum.” Shiro was broken out of his thoughts by the aliens voice instructing Lance yet again not to cum as he moaned and gasped, voice growing more ragged with each thrust of the toy.

The alien changed the pace, fucking quick and hard into what Shiro could only assume to be Lance’s prostate from the way he sobbed, muscles jumping and hips bucking, tears gathering quickly in his eyes from the stimulation, trying desperately to stay as still as he could, but not doing an incredibly good job.

“Please, please, please…” He sobbed, thighs shaking from the constant hard stimulation to his prostate and the alien kept at it for a little while longer before finally taking pity on him. 

“Cum.” He instructed and Lance did so almost immediately, crying out loudly, tears sliding down his face as he spilled over his abdomen, cum shooting over his chest and over his collarbones with the force of it. 

“Good, little one.” He was praised, giving a tired grin, preening under it. 

Lance’s face quickly screwed back up, coming down from his orgasm, but still having the toy quickly fucked into him. 

“N-no…” He whimpered, trying to squirm away from it, crying out loudly as the alien kept at it, wrapping a hand around his cock, and pumping it quickly. “N-no, can’t…” He whimpered, but the alien didn’t. 

“Yes you can, little one.” The alien soothed, not relenting on the pace as he quickly fucked the toy into him, Lance arching up off of the bed with a loud sob as he went back to the quick shallow pace into his prostate, quickly pumping his cock, squeezing and twisting his wrist around the head. 

Lance writhed on the bed, squirming under his touch, moaning loudly as tears tracked down his cheeks.

“Cum.” He instructed, pumping his cock quickly and Lance sobbed again. Shiro wasn’t sure if Lance would be able to do it so soon after the last time. 

It took about five strokes of his cock and thrusts of the toy before Lance came again, crying out and spilling again over his abdomen and the alien worked him through it, being careful to take the toy out and let go of his sensitive cock after he’d come down. 

The shot changed again, after that, and there had clearly been at least a few minutes in between, because Lance was no longer shaking and shying away from the touches like the overstimulated mess that he had been before, he was moaning and leaning into them.

His position had changed again, on his knees on the bed, curled up and in on himself, face pressed into the sheets with his wrists tied behind his back. His ankles were tied too, and the alien had handfuls of his ass, squeezing and kneading at the flesh as Lance moaned and rocked back against him. 

It seemed he’d finally given up on telling Lance to keep still now, or maybe that was because the edging and the overstimulation was over, and it was finally time to fuck him. 

The alien knelt up behind him, cock finally coming into shot. He was relatively big, not as big as some that Lance had taken, but definitely bigger than Shiro and Shiro couldn’t help the flash of jealousy coursing through him that Lance so easily had all these massive cocks at his disposal to fuck him whenever he wanted. 

Shiro at least wanted to have something that Lance would miss. 

He realised he was pouting at the screen as the alien finally began to sink into Lance, gripping his ass and spreading his cheeks as his hole stretched around him, slowly easing into him inch by inch, until he was fully seated inside of him. 

Lance groaned, squirming a little, but his movements were heavily restricted. He looked gorgeous like that, Shiro couldn’t deny it. 

Lance always looked gorgeous, whether he had full control, bouncing on a cock at his leisure, or spread out beneath someone, or tied up like this, bound and pushed into the bed, presented as nothing more than a hole to fuck. 

Shiro groaned softly as the alien began to pick up the pace, wrapping his hand back around his own cock and working himself, checking the video time and seeing that there was only a few minutes left. 

The scene cut a few times, and Shiro was internally cursing Lance for those editing choices; he wanted to watch every second he could get of that cock disappearing inside of him. 

Lance was writhing and moaning as he was driven into, alien grunting softly as he humped into him, gripping his hips tightly. 

It seemed they’d now been at this a little while, judging from how heightened Lance’s reactions were, muscles jumping and hips twitching, face screwed up in pleasure and jaw slackened, a little bit of saliva at his lip.

“Cum if you must, but I won’t stop.” The alien warned and Lance cried out, doing just that a mere few moments later, cock obscured by how Lance was bound, but Shiro had watched (and made) him cum enough times now to recognise it.

His cries got louder after that, the alien picking up the pace yet again, roughly fucking into him, bedposts hitting against the wall with each thrust, grunts and groans becoming more forceful, Lance’s skin whitening under where he was gripping it hard, and Shiro wondered if it had bruised and if he had somehow missed that on the phone. 

Lance’s moans were at a constant stream by the time the alien came, crying out loudly each time he hit into his prostate, and when he finally spilled into Lance, Lance came a final time, letting out a sob.

The alien drove his cock in deep as he rode his orgasm out, grinding his hips into him, before finally pulling his softening cock from Lance’s body, the camera moving in on Lance’s hole as it fluttered and clenched, cum dribbling out and down the insides of his thighs, just as it had in his own video with Lance. 

Shiro barely realised himself as he reached his own orgasm, too enthralled watching Lance, it coming over him in a wave, catching him off guard with a loud moan as he spilled over himself, eyes still fixed on Lance’s fluttering open hole as cum just kept dripping out. 

Shiro blew out a long shaky breath, breathing heavily as the alien placed a harsh slap on one of Lance’s ass cheeks, Lance’s whole body flinching, and then one on the other, hole clenching and squeezing a little more cum out, before the video faded out and ended.

Shiro looked at the black screen for longer than necessary, before reaching for a tissue to clean himself up with, and putting his tablet down. 

He got up, heading into the bathroom to run himself a bath, unable to face thinking about all of this just yet. He could sit on it, for a while, couldn’t he? It wasn’t as though he was going to see Lance again any time soon. 

He had time to think. 

 

***

 

Shiro tried not to think about Lance over the next few days, preparing for their next departure, checking through his contacts to make sure that Lance hadn’t arrived yet and come back online, when he saw a little green dot next to Keith’s name.

He called him pretty much immediately, excusing himself from the meeting he was in and heading back to his room. 

It took Keith a few minutes to answer, and he answered on about the third call, which Shiro was relieved about, to say the least. 

“Keith.” He said in relief as Keith popped up on his screen, looking distracted and busy, but at least he had answered. 

It wasn’t unusual for him to go off the radar for a little bit, but he’d usually check in with Shiro every now and again, and he’d been worried, seeing as no one else had heard from him either. 

“Hey, Shiro.” He said distractedly, muttering something to someone off screen before moving away from where he was, camera moving all over the place as he walked. 

It was around a minute or so before it settled, and Keith angled the camera towards his face. 

“Hey.” He said with a smile and Shiro smiled softly back.

“Hey, I missed you. How’ve you been?”

Keith hummed. “I’ve been okay, stressed. We’ve had a blackout over here which we’ve just… maybe got stabilised so, fingers crossed.”

Shiro nodded in understanding. “Oh, okay. We’ve all been worrying about you.”

“I appreciate it.” Keith smiled. “We’ve just been having some freak weather lately, I don’t know.”

“Well, as long as it’s getting sorted and you’re all okay then that’s the main thing. Lance told me to tell you to give him a call, and also that we should all get together on Earth one of these days.”

“Yeah, okay.” Keith smiled. “That sounds good. You’ve been in touch with Lance then? Oh, I suppose you’ve been back home since we last spoke?”

Oh, Shiro had been in touch with Lance alright. 

Something must have shown on his face, because Keith narrowed his eyes sceptically. “What…?”

“Uh, nothing.” He said, shaking his head. 

“Shiro.” Keith said, raising an eyebrow and folding his arms over his chest. “Don’t lie to me.”

Shiro sighed. “It’s a lot.”

“I think you and me have done our fair share of a lot. So what is it?”

“I found Lance’s secret alien porn channel and then I fucked him and then I filmed a porn video with him and kept fucking him and now we have this weird friends with benefits thing going on and I don’t know where I stand and I don’t know if I like him like him or if it’s just friendship sex feelings and it’s absolutely killing me.” He said all at once without taking a breath.

Keith blinked, looking at him for a long moment. “Is it April first where you are?”

Shiro huffed a laugh at that. “I’m afraid I can’t say that it is, no.”

“Right.” Keith said, looking at him confusedly. “I- don’t know where to begin unpicking that. You filmed a porn video with Lance?”

Shiro squeaked, turning red. Had he said that? “Uh, yeah.”

“And it’s- on the internet?”

“Yep.”

“Lance does porn.”

“Uh huh.”

“With aliens. And you.”

“Yes.”

“And you’re fucking Lance- as in- this is an ongoing thing.”

“Yep.”

“And you don’t know whether you have feelings for him, or if you just like him as a friend and also really want to screw his brains out.”

“Pretty, much, yeah.” Shiro said with a heavy sigh, running his hands over his face with a groan. 

This was fucked. He was so fucked. Everything about this was fucked. 

“Right.” Keith said, taking a few more moments to process things. “And you… haven’t spoken to Lance about this?”

“Lance doesn’t want a feelings thing, I know that.”

“Has he said that?”

“He didn’t have to, Keith.” Shiro sighed.

“Okay, and you think it’s maybe a feelings thing because…?”

Shiro shrugged. “Because… I tried to take him out on a date, but I don’t think he knew it was a date, and we fucked in the bathroom. We had this- weirdly emotional thing just before I left, and I asked if he wanted to come with us and he turned me down. Three times-”

“Three times?” Keith asked, choking. “Shiro, that’s a little desperate, don’t you think?”

“Hence why I think it’s a feelings thing.” He said through grit teeth. “But then we didn’t talk for five weeks because I was out here, and then we had a few phone calls, which were really nice, and then we had phone-video-sex and…” He sighed. “I don’t know. I don’t know if there are feelings, I just know that I miss him and I really want to have sex with him all the time, but I also want him to stay and cuddle with me afterwards like he did before I left. Because he doesn’t do that.”

Keith blew out a breath. “This is a lot, you were right. I don’t think I’m qualified to give you advice for this.”

Shiro groaned. “I know, I’m sorry.”

“No, you need to talk about it, that’s what you always- _always_ \- tell me. So maybe just… keep thinking on it, you know? And talk to Lance about it when you’re ready.”

“I can’t talk to Lance about it.” Shiro said quickly, shaking his head. “It’s not like that for him.”

“You don’t know that.”

“I do.”

“You know Lance…”

“No, I _knew_ Lance. He’s… emotionally? He’s completely unavailable and closed off. I don’t know why- I don’t know if he’s trying to protect himself from something, but… I can’t tell him, if it _is_ like that.”

Keit sighed, resting his chin in his palm. “Okay, whatever, I can’t force you. Think about it, at least, okay?”

“Yeah, yeah.” Shiro nodded, running a hand through his hair. “Enough about that, please, my brain can’t handle it. Tell me more about what you’ve been doing, please.”

Keith chuckled and rolled his eyes, nodding. “Yeah, okay.” He agreed.

 

***

 

Talking with Keith didn’t help, but Shiro managed to stop thinking about it too much for the time being. There wasn’t any use fretting over it, and he had more important things to focus on on the Atlas. 

He didn’t get to talk to Lance for another week or so, their switchovers timed so that they weren’t connected at the same time. 

Lance had probably been back connected by the time that the Atlas had been gone for a few days, though they weren’t due to arrive at their next destination for another two weeks.

Shiro didn’t have much of an issue with what he’d begun referring to as his ‘Lance problem’, though he would admit that he’d watched Lance’s latest video a fair few number of times, and he’d cum equally as hard with each. 

They’d been disconnected for about three weeks before they got there and were able to reconnect, Shiro waiting until the evening to call Lance, having at least a little self restraint, though he was willing to admit (only to himself), that he had really missed talking to him.

Lance answered the phone with a bright smile and a wave and Shiro instantly felt calmer, smiling softly back at him.

“Hey, it’s been a while.” He said, pushing his hair out of his face with a lopsided grin. “Have a safe trip?”

“We did, thank you.” Shiro said, nodding. “How about you? I suppose you’ve been there a little while now?”

“Mm, just over two weeks. I’ll be getting ready to move again soon, it’s a shame you always take so long getting places.”

Shiro hummed in agreement. “Well, we are a much larger ship, and we go on different routes to you.”

“True, true. I see you got ahold of Keith, finally.” 

“I did, they had some sort of freak storm and a blackout.”

“Mm, yeah, I heard.” He said, nodding. “At least he’s okay.”

“Yeah, it was worrying not to hear from him for so long.”

Lance hummed, flopping back onto what Shiro recognised as the bed from Lance’s ship, holding the tablet up in the air, aiming down at him. 

“So, the inevitable question, because I’m dying to know. What did you think of the video?” He asked with a grin and Shiro rolled his eyes playfully. 

“Mm, it was good. I liked it a lot.” 

“Did you just watch it once?” He asked with a teasing smile and Shiro gave him a look, but decided to humour him. 

“No, I’ve watched it a few times. Though, I’m surprised at how you were able to go again that evening.”

Lance shrugged. “Well, it was nice to just touch myself and cum when I was ready, to be honest. It was a nice way to end the night.” He said with a shrug.

Shiro nodded in understanding. “Mm, that makes sense. So, I saw you had someone filming, this time.” He said as nonchalantly as he could.

“Oh, yeah, it was a friend of the guy.” Lance nodded. “It was really good, actually, we got a lot of good angles that we wouldn’t have before. It was kind of exciting, too, not gonna lie…”

“Oh yeah? Is that something you’d be interested in, then…?” Shiro asked, tilting his head.

“What being watched?” Lance asked, forehead creasing in confusion, before smoothing out as it clicked. “Oh, having a threesome?”

“Uh, yeah.”

“Well, I don’t know. I hadn’t seriously considered it.” He said, tilting his head with a contemplative hum. “Maybe. Why, is that something you’d like to see?”

Shiro cleared his throat, cheeks flushing. “Maybe.”

“Is that something you’d like to… be involved in…?” He asked with a wicked grin and Shiro flushed harder.

“Uh.” He said, clearing his throat again. “Maybe.” 

“Ooh. I’ll take that as a yes then, captain. Who with? You have any hot coworkers?”

Shiro choked. “No, absolutely not.”

“Oh relax, I’m teasing you. I’d get an alien, at least.” He said, rolling his eyes. “More exciting, that way, isn’t it?”

“Um, sure.” Shiro agreed, swallowing. 

Lance giggled. “You need to relax, Shiro, do you need to jerk off?” He asked, tilting his head. “You’re so uptight. This should be easy to talk about, we’ve fucked a lot and you jack off to my porn videos very regularly.”

Shiro shrugged awkwardly, cheeks pink. “I guess.”

Lance rolled his eyes. “Well, I’ll be merciful and change the subject, for now.” He said with a wink. 

 

***

 

The thing was that talking to Lance was easy. This had never been something that Shiro did. Shiro didn’t sit and have long phone conversations for hours on end, he wasn’t really that sort of person. But Lance made it easy. 

It was easy to just sit or lie somewhere and listen to him go on about goodness knows what, watching his pretty face light up as he talked and wishing that he was there to brush his hair out of his eyes and tuck it behind his ear.

He needed a haircut. Shiro suspected he did, too, really. Lance really did, though; it was long enough that the ends curled slightly, and Shiro just wanted to lace his fingers through it and hear Lance give those little contented sighs, lips curled a little at the corners.

He’d never thought that he’d _be_ one for nightly phone conversations for hours, either. But here he was. And it really was _hours_ sometimes.

Sometimes Lance would talk and talk and talk, and then he’d turn a pretty shade of pink and sheepishly ask Shiro if he had anything exciting to report. 

And sometimes he was quieter, leaving Shiro to take the lead. He did, comfortably so, talking about things that he thought Lance might be interested in hearing, and it had gotten to the point where he would point things out to himself during his day - “I must remember to tell Lance.”

They hadn’t had phone sex again, and Shiro was content with that (while he certainly wouldn’t be complaining if that situation _did_ arise again…), he was happy with how things were right now. Things were good.

He’d never had a friend quite like Lance. He’d never even had a friend like Lance back when it could have _been_ Lance, and they had been in each other’s close proximity day after day after day and Shiro sometimes found himself longing for a similar situation. 

To just have Lance close.

He’d never had someone that he could just aimlessly talk about nothing with for the amount of time that he and Lance did. 

Someone that he could call when he was in the bath, even. Not in a weird way (as not weird as it _could_ be, mind). Someone that he could call in the evenings when he had overdue work and could guarantee to both distract him when necessary and motivate him to finish his tasks at the same time. 

Lance was… well, Lance was Lance, and Lance was wonderful. Suddenly Lance had gone from someone that Shiro used to know, someone that Shiro used to know pretty well, to someone that he desperately fantasised about day after day, to someone that had inserted himself into Shiro’s life in such a way that made it completely impossible to even comprehend removing him. In a way that Shiro would never want anything less than this ever again, a way that made him realise how much he hadn’t known about Lance when he’d thought he’d known him the best.

(Not to say that Shiro didn’t still fantasise about Lance, of course.)

Surprisingly, they didn’t talk too much about the sex thing or the porn thing, Lance would just give Shiro a heads up if there was a new video coming out, and he’d try to get one out before Shiro had to disconnect for a few weeks if the Atlas was moving.

Things went on like this for a good few months. Two more, maybe. And things were really, really good. 

Shiro was happy- actually _happy_ for the first time in a long time. Not just… contented, anymore. Happy. Happy and enjoying his days at work and enjoying his evenings talking to Lance even more. 

Lance hadn’t called him yet, this evening, but he’d sent him a message earlier in the day. A single winky face . 

Shiro knew what that meant. 

Knew what that meant enough to have been conditioned to get a bit of a semi at just the sight of such a message from Lance.

“I think you’ll enjoy this one.” Followed it, and Shiro bit his lip. 

Lance had never sent anything to accompany the winky face before, it was just sort of unspoken between them that… well, they used to hook up, and Lance still filmed porn, and Shiro still jerked off to it. 

And there was an unspoken possibility of the hooking up carrying on when they were to meet again, though Shiro had expressed his concerns… who was he to turn Lance down? How could he ever be anything less than completely gone for him?

He didn’t think he had it in him, and he’d certainly applaud anyone who did. 

Shiro didn’t know what that meant… but Lance seemed to enjoy messaging it to him at random times during the day- especially during the mornings so that Shiro wouldn’t be able to get away until the evening to watch the video… so that he’d be forced to be thinking about it all day until he could finally get away to watch it and touch himself.

Shiro was a slave to his cock, really. And Lance. Shiro was definitely a slave to Lance, too.

And it was a terrible way to live but really, it was the most wonderful way to live, too and Shiro didn’t want it to change any time soon.

It was ridiculous, really, because Shiro had never been _like this_. Shiro had absolutely never made decisions with his dick before (except maybe when he was drunk and eighteen), and he’d certainly never needed anyone the way he’d needed Lance. Never lusted so intensely, never… 

Hell, he’d only really jacked off maybe once every two weeks or so back in Voltron days, once he’d gotten back into the swing of things after Kerberos… Because he definitely had _not_ while he was with the Galra (torture did rather tend to fuck with the libido).

And even after that, once they’d gotten home and things had gotten back to normal and Shiro had been allowed his sex drive to return a little, maybe once every few days.

But now? It was like he was constantly horny, constantly thinking about Lance, constantly having to stop himself for fear of getting a semi during work hours, constantly wanting him, and watching his videos and fantasising, and talking to him, and wanting, wanting, wanting. 

Shiro had never felt like this before and he didn’t know how to get a grip on himself, couldn’t possibly get a grip on himself because it wasn’t just that. 

God, if it was only that then Shiro might have actually have stood a chance.

No, because Shiro would give all of that up in a heartbeat, throw it all away if it meant that he could keep having Lance like he did now. If he could keep talking to him, having his friendship like this, having more of Lance than it seemed anyone did at this moment and oh did Shiro want Lance. He wanted as much of him as he could get, as much as he could possibly be privileged to have.

And if that was his porn videos then fine, but if that was his friendship? His time? His smile? The way he looked just before he fell asleep, all curled up in bed and yawning, hair in his face and nose scrunched up, and the sleepy little lilt to his tone. 

Or the way he looked after a long day, running himself a bath and sinking into it, face mask on and humming softly to himself.

He was gorgeous. He was gorgeous at all times of day and there was only so much that Shiro could have and he wanted more, he always wanted so much more. 

Wanted to know how Lance looked in the morning glow of the sunrise, sweater cuffs pulled down past his fingertips as he clutched onto his coffee mug. Was he a morning coffee person? Or a tea person? 

Shiro wanted to know it all, wanted every little piece of him that Lance was willing to give. 

Shiro sighed heavily, running his hands over his face.

He didn’t usually get caught up in his thoughts like… _that_. 

He bit his lip, going back to his room and kicking off his shoes, pulling his clothes off and flopping down onto his bed.with a heavy groan.

He knew… well, he knew that this wasn’t… strictly platonic, anymore.

These weren’t just friendship and sex feelings no matter how hard Shiro tried to convince himself that they were. 

He only let himself have thoughts like this in the middle of the night, usually, when he could blame it on some sort of sleep delirium. 

But here he was, at seven pm, lying naked on his bed with a brand new video to watch of Lance getting fucked, and instead he was thinking about how much he wished he’d said yes, how much he wished he was beside him and he could bury himself in his arms, press his forehead into his neck and have slender arms wrapped tightly around him. 

Lance didn’t do cuddling after sex, that’s what he’d said. And that’s why the time before he left stuck in his throat so much, because… maybe he could try and convince himself that there was more to this. 

But he couldn’t, not really, because back then it _had_ just been sex. Sex and maybe a bit of an infatuation, but things hadn’t been like they were now, no.

Shiro shook his head, pulling Lance’s page up on his tablet. 

His mouth went dry as he saw the thumb nail.

 _Oh_. So that’s why Lance had said he thought he’d enjoy it. That- yeah. Shiro had thought that Lance had forgotten about that conversation, where he’d subtly, maybe not so subtly, suggested that Lance have a threesome. 

And there on the thumbnail was Lance. Having a threesome. 

Shiro didn’t think he’d clicked on something so quickly in his entire life.

He didn’t know why this was suddenly something that he was so into… he’d never thought that sort of thing to be a kink of his, nor had he ever thought he’d like to partake in such a thing. He wasn’t aware that during his teenage years that was a frequent search of his, either.

He suspected it was just because it was Lance. Because he was so incredibly into Lance, so incredibly into watching Lance do anything and everything. Shiro suspected that he’d be hard pushed to find something Lance did _not_ sexy, so there was that. 

The camera again, was being held, which sent a rush through Shiro- if it was being held then that meant there was again, another in the room - three aliens. Three aliens right there to touch and play with him, fuck and watch him get fucked. 

God, Shiro wished he could have been in the room with them. 

The video started with Lance on his knees on the floor, looking up at where the camera was being aimed with large innocent eyes and a sweet smile, nuzzling the bulge in the pants of one of the aliens as fingers laced encouragingly through his hair. 

Lance smiled, leaning into the touch happily, nuzzling against the clothed cock and looking up at the camera again.

The alien made quick work of unbuttoning his pants, pulling his large cock, not fully hardened yet, out from his underwear and gently nudging the tip against Lance’s cheek.

Lance’s gasp was audible, lust filling his eyes as he tilted his head slightly, pressing delicate kisses to the tip as he wrapped his fingers around the shaft, fingertips only just meeting together. 

Lance and the alien moaned together as he began to stroke his hand over it, kissing the tip lovingly, before swirling his tongue around it, blowing cool air over it as the alien laced his fingers back into Lance’s hair. 

The other alien just watched for a few minutes, before getting his own cock out. He was slightly less endowed than the first, but still bigger than Shiro.

Shiro really didn’t know why pretty much all aliens had to be bigger than him, he was going to get a complex at this rate. He’d always been more than confident in his cock size, but it seemed humans were simply cursed compared to the rest of the universe.

The second alien began working his hand over his cock, coaxing it to full hardness and lightly slapping it against Lance’s cheek.

Lance moaned, lips messily kissing over the shaft of the other alien, moving his head to give the other cock the same treatment. 

Lance moaned as fingers tightened their grip in his hair, eyes fluttering and jaw going slack, the slightly smaller alien taking advantage of this and pushing his cock deeply into Lance’s mouth.

Lance gave a soft whimper around it, jaw slacking further as he allowed the alien to push his cock in as far as he could before Lance was gagging. 

“Warm him up for me.” The first alien grunted, and the second alien seemed more than happy to oblige, sliding his cock in the rest of the way, tip clearly slipping into Lance’s throat from the way Lance’s eyes rolled and his eyelids fluttered, moaning deeply. 

“That’s it, baby.” He moaned, rolling his hips and beginning to lazily thrust into Lance’s open mouth. “Take it just like that.”

Lance whined as he was pulled off of the cock, brows pinching together in disapproval, before both tips were being rubbed against his lips and then Lance was lazily moaning again, already looking completely blissed out.

The smaller one thrust into his mouth again as the first alien grabbed up Lance’s wrist and put his hand around his cock, Lance quickly taking the hint and quickly beginning to pump it, drawing low groans from the both of them.

Lance moaned as he let his mouth be used, slacking his jaw and groaning with each rough tug on his hair as the cock was quickly fucked into his mouth, balls slapping against his chin, and Shiro could just pick up weak gagging noises through the wet messy ones. 

He didn’t let up, though, using Lance’s mouth how he liked, making sure that he could take the whole length easily, tip spearing into his throat with each thrust, making Lance’s grip on the other cock falter, pace messy and jerky as he tried to stay focused, tears streaking down his face.

The camera moved out a little, giving a better view, and Shiro could see Lance’s cock, bobbing between his legs, curved upwards towards his stomach with how hard he was, and he was lightly rocking his hips, humping the air as he pleasured the aliens.

Lance was suddenly yanked off of the cock by his hair, yelping and then giving an unhappy whine, before the alien took his own cock in hand, quickly fisting over it and Lance let his lips part, eyes falling closed as he waited, moaning as cum hit his face in thick ropes, painting his cheeks and his chin.

Lance barely had time to lick his lips clean before the other alien was thrusting into his mouth, forcing his lips open with the thick head of his cock and pressing in, holding Lance in place firmly by the tight grip in his hair and pushing in until his balls rested against Lance’s cum coated chin.

The alien yanked Lance’s forehead, making sure his cock was fully seated inside of him, before bringing his hand up to wrap around his throat, the camera moving in as he squeezed lightly and Lance’s eyes fluttered, a desperate whimper escaping him. 

He released him, trailing a fingertip over the slight bulge in his throat and Shiro swallowed thickly, squeezing around the base of his own cock at that- it was the outline of the alien’s cock bulging in Lance’s throat.

He finally pulled out, letting Lance go as he spluttered and choked, heaving for air as tears leaked down his face, and the camera panned in on him; he looked stunning. Absolutely breathtakingly stunning.

The shot changed after that, and Lance had been cleaned up, clearly having had a few minutes to get his breath back.

He was on the bed, now, being spread open on one of the aliens fingers, two buried inside of him, legs spread wide.

His cock had softened a little, laying against his thigh, but his chest was heaving as he squirmed under the touch, lip shiny and plumped from where he’d bitten it, eyes fluttering.

He gasped harshly, arching off of the bed as the alien hit into his prostate, giving a soft whimper as he moved his fingers inside of him. 

They continued like this for a little, working him up and working him open, before the second alien took Lance’s half hard cock in hand and began pumping it, dwarving it with the size of his hand wrapped around it.

Lance whimpered, squirming under his touch as he was coaxed to full hardness, short little gasps being punched out of him as his prostate was teased.

Lance whined, biting his lip as the camera moved in, the alien shuffling down the bed a little, taking Lance’s cock into his mouth and sucking.

Lance keened softly, the other alien slipping a third finger into him simultaneously, spreading him open on them, scissoring them inside of him, Lance gasping, moving a hand down to tentatively bury in the alien’s hair as he sucked his cock.

He teased his shaft, working his tongue over it, taking it into his throat and then pulling off completely, teasing the tip with feather light kisses and flicks of his tongue through Lance’s leaking slit. 

Lance shuddered, whining and biting his lip, clearly restraining himself from bucking his hips as he was pleasured, keening softly again as the other alien thrust his fingers hard into him, crooking them inside of him, Lance bucking his hips and pushing his cock into the alien’s waiting mouth.

The alien eased in a fourth finger at around that point and Lance practically sobbed, the other alien taking him deep into his mouth, clearly sucking hard around him as Lance threw an arm across his face, crying out desperately.

He was close, Shiro knew he was close, and the aliens knew it too, working him faster until he was sobbing, arching into their touches, the alien pulling off of his cock just in time as he came hard over his abdomen, some of it hitting onto the aliens chin, which was eagerly licked off by the other.

Fingers were then being pulled from Lance, and he was roughly pushed over onto his knees, though Lance only moaned at the rough treatment, kneeling up and presenting himself as the alien slicked his thick cock and positioned himself at Lance’s entrance, thrusting between his cheeks a few times before pushing slowly into him. 

Lance groaned, lips hanging open in pleasure and eyes screwed shut, letting the other alien grab him by his hair and hold him up, jaw instinctively going slack as he nudged his cock at Lance’s lips, pushing into his mouth.

Lance didn’t seem to be too coherent after that, just a mess of moans and mewls, tears slowly leaking down his face and saliva drooling from his mouth as he was speared on both ends, large cock driving into his ass over and over, the sound of skin slapping against skin harsh in the room. 

Lance looked completely blissed out when the camera panned to his face, eyes fluttering now and again, but mostly shut, a constant stream of moans and whines from his mouth as his throat was abused, cock roughly fucking deep into his throat again and again, being held in place by his hair as he was used.

Shiro had to grip himself harshly a few times to stop himself from getting too close, because this- Lance had been right when he’d said that this was something that Shiro would enjoy. Shiro had never been more grateful that he’d suggested this or that Lance had taken his advice.

Lance was gorgeous, absolutely stunning and he deserved to be used exactly how he wanted, deserved to have someone pleasuring him from all angles, camera moving in as the alien leant over him wrapping a hand around his cock which was hard and aching between his legs, little globs of precum dripping onto the sheets below.

Shiro wanted to watch this forever, wanted to watch Lance like this forever. Could have cum over and over and over and what he wouldn’t have given to be in the room with them, watching him- touching him- bringing him even more pleasure than he was already getting.

It was over all too soon, or maybe Shiro was just too caught up in it all to notice, but Lance cried out harshly as he came, muffled by the cock in his mouth, tears streaming down his face and cock jumping as streams of cum shot onto the bed beneath him.

The alien in his mouth pulled out, Lance panting harshly, gasping for air, but keeping his mouth open, managing to open his eyes and look up eagerly as the alien stroked himself, quickly pumping his length and groaning, before releasing all over Lance’s face.

Lance moaned, licking his lips to try and clean himself up a little, still breathlessly moaning as his ass was roughly fucked into, head falling forward as the alien picked up the pace, grunting softly as he gripped Lance’s ass, skin whitening under the pressure of his thumbs, groaning deeply before pushing himself in as deeply as he could, grinding his hips and throwing his head back, before pulling out, camera moving in as Lance’s hole clenched, cum quickly dripping out of him. 

Shiro worked himself quickly, only taking another two strokes before he came hard over himself, surprised that he had been able to make himself last to the end of the video, though he supposed that that was mostly due to how completely entranced by Lance he was.

He was still panting, barely even having slowed his hand before Lance was calling him. He answered, not aiming the camera at his face, just up at the ceiling and desperately trying to catch his breath.

“Heeey Shi- oh, where are you?” Lance asked and Shiro could imagine his cute little frown of confusion.

“I’m here.” He said, hoping he didn’t sound as wrecked as he felt, cock still hanging out, body still painted with cum and chest still heaving.

“Are you uh, are you okay?” He asked, sounding concerned.

“What? Oh yeah, I’m fine. I’m great. I’m-”

“You just came.” Lance said with a small giggle and Shiro scowled.

“I did _not_.”

“Shiro, I know what you sound like when you’ve cum, and what other reason would you have? Plus I posted the video today and while I thought you might have watched it earlier… there’s every chance you got off work late and so only just finished.”

“Well, you got me there.” Shiro said with a huff. 

Yes, got off work late. Not having gay thoughts about Lance for an hour. Absolutely not.

“So can I see you now?”

“Um, no.” 

“Shirooooo.” Lance whined and Shiro could hear the pout in his voice. “It’s not like I haven’t seen it before, c’mon I’ve sucked your dick how many times? You’ve fucked me how many times?”

Shiro huffed, moving the camera to show his face. “Better?”

“No, I wanna see your cock.” Lance pouted.

Shiro rolled his eyes. “Why?”

“Cause I’m horny.” Lance said with a sweet smile as explanation. 

“Really.” Shiro said flatly.

“Mmmhm.” Lance said with a grin. “Can you blame me? All I’ve had to think about was you touching that pretty cock of yours while watching me get fucked. Did you like it?”

Shiro wet his lip. “Yes, I liked it.” 

“I thought you would.” Lance grinned.

“Well, I did. Very much so.” He said with an amused smile.

“So are you gonna get me off then, or not?” Lance pouted, positioning his tablet on his bedside table.

“Is that why you called?” Shiro asked amusedly with a raised eyebrow.

Lance pouted harder. “You know it isn’t.” He said, and Shiro did. “I’m really turned on and you’re really hot and I want you really bad.”

Shiro gave a low hum “What do you want, baby?” 

“Want you to fuck me.” Lance whined.

“That the best you can do?” Shiro asked, raising an eyebrow. “You gonna take your clothes off for me?”

Lance whined, pulling his shirt off over his head, and running his hands over his chest, gently tugging at his nipples with a breathy whine.

“I want- I wanna sit on your face again…” He whimpered.

“Uh huh?” Shiro asked with a low hum. “Want me to eat that pretty ass of yours again until you can’t hold yourself up and you’re crying for it? Then you want me to hold you down and keep going? Keep going until you’re sobbing and you can’t take it anymore? Is that what you want, baby?”

Lance whimpered at that, hands moving down to cup himself through his pants. “Fuck… You should not- be allowed to be that hot- god, even just your voice is-”

Shiro gave a low chuckle. “Mmhm? You getting off on the sound of my voice?”

Lance pouted, giving him a small nod. “Uh huh. I reaaaaally want you to eat me out again.” He whined. “Like- so bad, I haven’t been eaten out in so long…”

“Mm, don’t worry baby. Next time I see you I’ll make you sob for me.”

Lance shuddered, giving a soft moan and quickly pulling his pants down and getting his cock out.

“There’s that pretty cock, already nice and hard for me, gorgeous?”

“Uh huh.” Lance nodded, biting his lip and rolling his hips a little as he began to stroke over himself.

“You want me to get you nice and wet and loose with my tongue and then fuck you open on my fingers ready for my cock?” He asked.

Lance gasped out a moan, nodding and scrambling on his bedside table for his lube, quickly slicking his fingers and pushing two into himself.

“That desperate?” Shiro asked amusedly and Lance whined, nodding.

“Want you… want you really bad…”

“You’re so cute and whiney, baby.” Shiro teased, shaking his head as he watched Lance, quickly fucking his fingers into himself and running his hand over his cock. “So desperate, you don’t even wanna draw this out, do you? You just wanna cum for me.”

“Uh huh, just wanna cum, just wanna cum, please…” He moaned, nodding quickly and crying out softly as he hit into his prostate. “A-are you gonna t-touch yourself? Please, please, wanna see…”

Shiro hummed, biting his lip and taking his cock back in hand, already having perked up a little from watching Lance and giving a soft moan.

Lance moaned appreciatively, working himself faster and teasing the head of his cock with a whimper.

“What else d’you want, baby? When we see each other again?”

Lance whined. “Want- want- want you hard, please, want you as hard as you can give it, want you to slap me, call me names, fuck me hard, just use me…” He moaned and Shiro gave a low groan at that.

“You really are a little slut, Lance.” He commented and Lance gave a high pitched whine. “You really just think with your cock, don’t you? Where your next orgasm is gonna come from, who it’s gonna come from, who's gonna make you cum next.”

Lance gave another high whine, eyes screwed closed and brow pinched as he nodded, fucking himself faster, sinking another finger into himself. 

“I’ll give you what you want, baby, give it to you nice and hard and rough, just the way you like it. Stretch you out nice and wide, might even use my whole hand. I know you can take it, you take bigger cocks than I’ve ever seen like you were made to take them, like you were made just to take cocks up your ass and down your throat, like the perfect little whore that you are.”

“Shiro- Shiro, please, ‘m gonna cum-” Lance whimpered and Shiro gave a low chuckle.

“And you really do get off on it so much, don’t you? You really do get off on being told what a little fucking slut you are, how well you take it, how everyone likes to watch you all spread out and fucked stupid, mouth hanging open as you cry out, tears on your face, stretched so wide around whoever you’ve decided to bed next, whoever you’ve decided gets to stuff you full of their cock and their cum that day.”

“Shiro-” Lance gasped, working himself quickly before spilling over his hand, bucking his hips and fucking into his fist as he rode out his orgasm, quickly fucking his fingers into himself.

He panted, coming down from it with a small whimper. 

“That- fuck.” He said softly.

“Was that um-” Shiro said, biting his lip and frowning. “Too much?”

“What? No, don’t go getting embarrassed, that was- that was great, really.” He said with a tired smile. “What about you?”

“Ah, I’m okay.” Shiro said, shaking his head. “I just came, it’s fine.”

Lance rolled his eyes with a small laugh. “You’re getting old, Shiro.”

Shiro huffed a laugh and pouted. “I’m not.”

“Mm, debatable.”

“It’s not up for debate.”

Lance giggled, getting a tissue to clean himself up and Shiro belatedly realised that he himself was still covered in cum and he needed to clean up, so did the same. 

“So how was your daaaay?” Lance asked, after cleaning up and settling down into bed, rolling onto his side so he could look up at where he’d propped his tablet up.

“You know very well how it was, messaging me at ten in the morning.” Shiro said, raising an eyebrow.

Lance giggled, biting his lip. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Mmmhm, sure. So all that aside, it was okay.” Shiro said, giving an amused smile back.

“That’s good.” Lance hummed, yawning. 

“Sleepy? What time is it?”

“Oh, it’s not too bad, I think we’re getting closer.” Lance shrugged it off, yawning.

“D’you wanna get some sleep?” Shiro asked softly.

Lance gave a small shrug. “I don’t know… I’m not too tired.”

“Yes you are.” Shiro said, raising an eyebrow and Lance pouted.

“Okay, fine, I am, but it’s not late.”

“That doesn’t mean you can’t get some sleep.” Shiro said and Lance made a small whining noise. “Come on, I’ll call you tomorrow, okay?”

Lance sighed and nodded. “Can you just um, stay a little longer?” He asked softly, looking sleepily up at him. 

“Yeah, of course.” Shiro said with a soft smile. 

Lance smiled back, snuggling down further into bed and letting his eyes close. Shiro gave him a few minutes, before muting himself and going into the bathroom to get ready for bed, propping his tablet up on the side as he brushed his teeth and got in the shower.

Lance would have been able to see everything had he opened his eyes, but he didn’t, and Shiro figured that he must have fallen asleep by now. 

He finished up in the shower, rubbing his hair dry with a towel and falling back into bed with a sigh, holding his tablet up and smiling softly.

He couldn’t see Lance too well in the dark, but he looked contented, fast asleep, jaw slacked a little and hair curling at the ends. 

Shiro looked at him for longer than he should have, chest feeling heavy and floaty all at the same time. He reluctantly ended the call, sighing softly as he looked at their chat history instead of Lance’s sleeping face, and then he closed it off, frowning softly to himself as he turned over and closed his eyes.

 

***

 

They’d made better time than they thought they would, Shiro having to shoot Lance a quick message to tell him that they’d be setting off earlier than he thought and that he wouldn’t be able to call for the next week or so.

Lance had sent him a sad face back and to have a safe trip along with a few hearts, so that was okay. If the hearts made Shiro’s own do a few flips, then that was his own business and no one else’s.

He’d missed Lance over the week that it took before they would be orbiting the next planet, and he supposed there was no way that he couldn’t. They talked on the phone pretty much every night now, whether it be for a quick half an hour or a good few. Sometimes Shiro stayed until Lance fell asleep and sometimes Lance stayed until Shiro fell asleep, though admittedly, that was less often, especially because of the time difference. 

It was lonely, going back to his room and getting ready for bed with no Lance on the other end of the screen, animatedly talking about whatever planet he was on this time or asking Shiro about how his day had been.

It was more lonely than Shiro would have liked, and it was definitely more lonely than last time they’d been apart, which meant that this crush thing was only getting worse, and not better. Which was bad.

Eventually, though, they arrived in orbit, having a brief viewing of the planet they were due to land on the next day, before sending everyone off to bed for the night.

Shiro called Lance as soon as he got back, eager to see his face and hear his voice again after the week apart. 

Shiro knew this was bad, really, he did. But he wasn’t willing to think about it more than necessary. He could enjoy a phone call with Lance without having to panic about his feelings, right?

Lance answered pretty much straight away, beaming on the other end of the screen as Shiro sat down and smiled back. 

God, he was beautiful.

“Um, thank you?” Lance asked, immediately turning pink and Shiro’s eyes widened. “Did you not mean to say that out loud?” He asked with a small giggle and Shiro shook his head. “You’re not very good at keeping thoughts inside your head, are you?”

He was still giggling and Shiro glared. “Hello to you, too.” He said, rolling his eyes, very well aware of the occasion on which he had accidentally blurted out that Lance was a porn star - it had sparked all of this and the revitalisation of his sex life, after all. 

“How was your trip?” Lance asked, biting his lip to try and stop himself from laughing, but Shiro was grateful for the subject change. 

“It was good.” He said, nodding. “Pretty stress free, but we’re in orbit of a planet now and we’re set to land tomorrow.”

“Ooh, that’s good. Get some fresh air, at last.” He said.

“Mmmmhm. So how’ve you been, then?” Shiro asked softly, tilting his head and Lance smiled.

“I’ve been good, haven’t done any filming since you left, though, I’ve just sort of been fucking around here. It’s pretty cool, the grass is pink and smells like blueberries, so of course I spent the afternoon rolling down some hills I found.”

Shiro snorted. “You- okay. I’m not even surprised.”

Lance looked affronted. “And what is that supposed to mean?”

“Just that you’re the kind of person that enjoys the little things in life enough to go rolling down a hill because the grass smells like blueberries.” He said fondly. “It wasn’t an insult.”

Lance’s cheeks tinged pink a little, and Shiro wished that the call quality was better. “Oh.” 

Shiro smiled softly and then frowned after a few moments. “Did you say pink grass?” He asked and Lance nodded.

“Uh huh, why?” 

“Nothing.” Shiro said, shaking his head. “What time is it for you?”

“Mm, not too late, about eight thirty.” Lance said with a hum, glancing to his clock.

Shiro hummed and nodded. “That’s okay then, we’ve got a bit of time.” Lance yawned. “Unless you’re too tired.” He said, raising an eyebrow.

“For you? Never.” Lance said with a lopsided grin and Shiro bit his lip, smiling softly.

Pink grass and eight thirty pm. Shiro would have to double check that tomorrow. It sounded… suspiciously like the planet they were scheduled to land on tomorrow, and the time’s matching up? Well, that just made it an even larger chance.

Shiro didn’t want to get his hopes up too much, though, and he didn’t want to say anything to Lance either, in case he was wrong. 

They talked for a few hours until Lance got sleepy, yawning and denying it until Shiro said that he himself was tired too, and Lance finally gave in, saying that Shiro should get a good nights rest for the landing tomorrow. 

Shiro drew out the goodnight for as long as he could, before finally hanging up and settling down into bed, laying there awake for a little while; having lied to Lance about being tired, but knowing that that was the only way he could make sure that he got some sleep. 

 

***

 

Shiro headed down to work early the next morning, going over the spec of the planet again, before quickly messaging Lance asking where abouts he was.

_in the capital, i think?_

_Lance, it’s a planet, there are lots of capitals. Does your tablet have location services?_

_i mean, i think so? idk if they work out here_

_Switch them on anyway._

_is this the planet? that you’re landing on_

_I think it is, yes._

_i’ll be there to greet you then, captain <3_

Shiro smiled stupidly at his tablet for a few minutes too many after getting that, huffing a soft laugh to himself and waiting for Lance to switch on his location, getting someone on the team to lock onto it and set the landing for there. 

It was hard, getting in touch with the generals on the planet and asking to land somewhere else, but as the captain, Shiro had certain… perks, and he insisted.

He wasn’t sure that he was supposed to be using his status for such endeavors, but… it didn’t matter. It was too late now, and after some bargaining with the locals, a new landing place had been set.

Shiro imagined the town would be abuzz before the landing, and it took them a little while to get down there, but eventually, the Atlas was firmly seated on the ground, and everyone was de-boarding. 

Shiro had only made it a few steps off of the ship before arms were being flung around his neck and Lance had launched himself at him.

Shiro wrapped his arms firmly around Lance’s waist, laughing softly as Lance clung to him, burying his face in his neck and holding on just as tightly.

“Missed you.” Lance mumbled quietly and Shiro pressed a soft kiss to the side of his head. 

“I missed you too.” Shiro said back equally as quietly, not letting go until Lance did, which was a good few minutes later.

“I can’t believe- out of all of the planets, we actually matched.” Lance said with a laugh, lacing his fingers with Shiro’s with a smile.

“I know, I can’t quite believe you’re real.” He said, gently brushing his fingers over Lance’s cheek with his free hand, and tucking Lance’s hair behind his ear.

“Real as real.” Lance said with a wide smile, tugging on Shiro’s hand. “Come on, did you bring any money with you? There’s a really cool market place here we should go to.”

Shiro grinned and nodded. “And here I was, hoping we could roll down some hills together.”

Lance rolled his eyes. “We can do that later, now come on.”

Shiro laughed, letting Lance pull him away from the crew, getting a few knowing looks from those who had definitely seen him and Lance going back to his bedroom a fair few number of times back on Earth.

He simply rolled his eyes, giving them a good natured smile and let Lance pull him wherever he wanted to, and at this point, he probably would have followed Lance anywhere.

Lance pulled him in and around the stalls, picking up little trinkets and putting them back down again, humming to himself and not dropping Shiro’s hand. 

Shiro felt giddy, felt high. He hadn’t felt this carefree in a while, like Lance could pull him to the ends of the earth and as long as he was giggling just like that, smiling at him just like that Shiro could just… drop right off over the edge.

Except he didn’t have to, because being with Lance was easy, and they could meander through the marketplace without a care in the world, and Shiro knew that tomorrow they would have to get back to work, make a start on things, but in this moment? He didn’t care. 

Currently, Lance was humming to himself, flicking through a clothing rack and pulling things off, holding them up to himself, and then holding them up to Shiro (presumably to get a better look, because Shiro would never fit into the things that Lance was picking out), and putting them back. 

He’d hummed at a few, looking at them with creased brows, before dropping Shiro’s hand and heading towards the changing room, disappearing inside for a few moments before pulling the curtain back.

Shiro blinked, hardly having realised what Lance had picked up. It was a yellow sundress, coming to his mid thigh and god, he looked gorgeous. He had no right to look that gorgeous. 

He tilted his head with a shy smile, though really, it wasn’t shy at all; a teasing coyness, like an “I know I look good, but I shouldn’t,” like a “you shouldn’t like me in this, but I _know_ that you do.”

“What d’you think?” Lance asked, biting his lip and Shiro swallowed, running his eyes over his frame.

“It’s uh- it’s a good colour. It’s pretty.” He said and Lance gave an airy laugh.

Oh, Lance knew exactly what he did to Shiro and there was no given time that he wasn’t using that to his full advantage. 

Lance pulled the curtain again, changing his clothes and the opened it again, resting a hand on his hip and running his other through his hair.

God, Shiro wanted to absolutely devour him. Absolutely devour him whole. Absolutely eat his ass until he was sobbing.

“And this?” He asked softly, batting his lashes.

Shiro swallowed again, nodding. It was… it was slutty, really. That was the only way to describe it, but Lance somehow pulled off slutty really, really well.

Shiro didn’t know where to start, the shorts or the crop top. It was lilac, the top. Cut just under where his nipples were, with writing across the front in a language that Shiro couldn’t read.

Then the shorts… oh god, the shorts. They were semi high waisted, waistband coming just under his navel. They were a light denim, with some sort of sequin-rhinestone embellishment. And they were short. Like, short short. Like short enough that if Shiro had have left hickeys on Lance’s thighs, everyone would have seen them. 

Oh god, Shiro needed to leave hickeys on Lance’s thighs. Shiro absolutely needed to litter his thighs with marks and then have him parade around in those shorts.

“I’m uh… gonna take that as a yes? Or should I be taking it as a no?” He asked with a smirk, tilting his head.

“Yes. You should definitely- definitely take that as a yes.”

Lance grinned and rolled his eyes, coming out of the changing room and gathering his old clothes up, taking them to the counter and explaining that he was going to wear them out, before removing the labels and purchasing them, taking Shiro’s hand again with a wink after putting his old clothes into a bag and carrying on leading him around the market. 

A little while later, Lance managed to get his hands on some knee high boots in his size, and Shiro really wasn’t sure where they were getting this stuff from, as the aliens that inhabited this planet were really not of a human body type, though he supposed that accounted for how enthusiastically they were trying to sell Shiro and Lance any of their more human appropriate merchandise when they saw them coming.

The boots? Well, that was the final straw. That was absolutely it, and Shiro was probably going to end up cumming in his pants like a teenager, just from looking at him. 

Lance grinned at him like he knew exactly what he was doing, zipping up the boots and putting his own shoes into the bag, paying for them and leading Shiro away, stopping to press a wet kiss to his cheek with a giggle.

“Did you miss me?” He asked silkily, biting his lip and dragging Shiro along to the next stall.

“More you could possibly know.” Shiro said, swallowing, eyes trained on Lance’s ass as he sashayed on.

“Good.” Lance grinned back, picking up a few things and putting them back down. “Is there nothing here that you like?”

“Oh, there’s something I like, but I’m afraid he isn’t for sale.” Shiro murmured, pressing himself behind Lance and resting a hand on his hip.

Lance giggled, grinding back against him for a moment and flashing him a grin. “You never know, I could branch into prostitution next.” He teased and Shiro narrowed his eyes with a playful smile.

“Oh, I’m sure.”

“What is that supposed to mean?” Lance laughed. 

“It means that I’m sure they’d be lining up for miles if it meant they could get a chance at having you.” He said, pulling Lance back against him and nipping at his ear lobe.

Lance bit his lip as he gasped softly, leaning into Shiro. “You think?” He asked a little breathlessly.

“I know.” Shiro murmured, only releasing Lance from his grip at the look from the merchandise dealer, raising a suspicious eyebrow and pursing his lips.

“Mm, well lucky you you get to have me for free then, huh.” Lance giggled as they moved on, Lance throwing a cheeky wink back to the dealer.

“Mmmm, definitely lucky me.” Shiro agreed. “I’m going to make you sob, tonight.” He said and Lance raised an eyebrow.

“That’s a bold assumption that I’m coming home with you tonight, Captain.” He said with a grin and Shiro narrowed his eyes, pulling Lance to him, their bodies pressed flush together.

“Oh, I think it’s a fair assumption.” He reasoned, hand slipping to rest on Lance’s lower back, smirking a little as Lance’s breath hitched.

“Uh huh…” Lance agreed as Shiro slid his hand down to lightly cup his ass, giving a soft squeeze.

“Uh huh?” Shiro asked teasingly, giving another squeeze, a little more firmly this time, and not caring who was around to watch them. 

“Yeah.” Lance nodded, cheeks flushed and he pulled away from them, giving a soft and almost inaudible whimper as Shiro delivered a smack against his ass, wanting nothing more than to get him out of those tight little shorts and get his mouth on that ass of his. 

Lance pulled him around the last few stalls pretty distractedly, glancing at Shiro and flushing each time he found his gaze wandering over his body, more specifically over his ass when he was faced away, but when he could get a good look at him, his chest too.

The crop top really did wonders for him too, he looked incredible. If Shiro hadn’t seen Lance naked this many times by now he might have been wondering, but clearly Lance hadn’t let himself go since the war had ended because he was just as built, if not even more. 

That muscle that Shiro just wanted to touch, run his fingertips over, run his tongue through each dip between his abs, down to his cock or up to a nipple, latch on and suck, make Lance moan for him so prettily. 

Everything about Lance was pretty, Lance was just a pretty person, but by god was he hot. 

Finally they reached the end of the stalls and Shiro was more grateful for that than he’d been for anything in awhile. 

Because then Lance was pulling him back towards the Atlas, and it took them a few minutes to get there, but Lance was soon pushing Shiro down the hallway, route familiar to him as he fumbled with the door handle, pushing the door closed and pushing Shiro up against it, fists curling in his collar as he pulled him against his lips.

Shiro moaned softly, arms immediately sliding around Lance’s waist, fingers dancing over his waist and his hips, the small of his back, before settling on his ass, squeezing and swallowing Lance’s soft moan as he nibbled at his bottom lip, before slipping his tongue into Lance’s mouth. 

Lance moaned eagerly into his mouth, rocking his hips and pushing his ass back into Shiro’s hands, moaning as he squeezed a little harder. Lance whined, quickly moving his hands down Shiro’s chest, unbuttoning his shirt as quickly as he could. 

Shiro hummed encouragingly, nipping and Lance’s bottom lip and pushing him backwards into the room a little, hands going for the button on his shorts.

Lance broke away from him, giving him a smirk and leaning down to unzip his boots, kicking them off and then going for his shirts.

Shiro watched with a dry mouth as Lance shimmied out of his shorts, letting them fall to the floor and leaving him in a pair of what looked to be pink lacy panties.

Shiro groaned, pulling Lance against him by the hips and grabbing on to his wrists as he tried to pull off the crop top.

“Leave it.” He murmured, pushing him down on to the bed, pulling his unbuttoned shirt off of his shoulders, before crawling onto the bed over Lance and kissing him hungrily, Lance arching into his every touch and moaning into his mouth.

Shiro kissed him like that for a few more moments, before flipping them over, pulling Lance into his lap and resting his hands on his hips. 

“Missed me, big guy?” Lance asked with a breathless smile and Shiro groaned softly, running his hands over Lance’s waist, cupping his half hard cock through the lace material.

“Absolutely.” He murmured, gently teasing at the head with his thumb and forefinger until soft whimpers were spilling from Lance’s lips as his hips rocked.

“Shiro…” Lance whined breathlessly, biting his lip.

“I believed I promised you something a little while ago…”

Lance’s breath hitched a little at that. “Yeah…?”

“Uh huh. Been thinking about it ever since you put those goddamned shorts on.” 

Lance gave a soft laugh, rolling his eyes. “You’re so easy, Shiro.”

Shiro narrowed his eyes with a playful huff. “Get on my face.” He said in a soft growl, watching as Lance’s breath caught and he wet his lip.

“You uh- want me to take these off?”

“Leave them.” Shiro instructed, pulling Lance by his thighs up his body until he was hovering over his face.

Shiro grabbed the material, pushing it to the side, immediately burying his face against Lance’s ass, giving a soft contented sigh at finally being where he had wanted to be for so long now, hadn’t appreciated enough when he’d had it before.

Lance huffed out a breath, gripping onto the headboard. Shiro nosed at his hole, immediately sucking the tender skin on his inner thighs into his mouth, remembering his earlier thoughts about marking him up, nipping at his thighs and biting down until he was sure it would mark.

Lance had had mixed responses about marks in the past, but right now, Shiro couldn’t care less. Lance was here with him and Lance was his- at least for a few days and this skin was _his_ to mark up.

He sucked and bit at his skin until Lance had a hand buried in his hair, whimpering at the sting, but not complaining, impatiently tugging at Shiro’s hair and giving a relieved groan when Shiro nosed back at his hole.

“Please…” He breathed, and who was Shiro to deny him?

Shiro lapped over his hole, drinking in the noises Lance made for him, finally real here, in his room, not through the shitty speakers on his tablet.

He eagerly licked and lapped at his hole until Lance was squirming, finally burying his tongue inside of him, fucking him with it and sucking at his rim, teeth catching every so often in a way that had Lance whimpering for him.

Shiro could have done this for hours, honestly, could have stayed here with his face buried in Lance’s ass, fucking him with his tongue, holding his cheeks apart as he sucked and lapped at his hole, drawing the prettiest of moans and mewls from him, fucking him until his thighs began to shake.

He’d never get tired of it, never tire of focusing solely on giving Lance pleasure, bringing Lance to the edge over and over until he was begging for something more.

And make him beg he did, ate him out eagerly, Lance’s hand tight in his hair, thighs shaking and rocking, panting hard as he struggled to keep himself up.

“Please, Shiro, please, please, please…” He begged, breathless and a whining lilt to his tone, before Shiro finally took pity on him, helping him off of his face and rolling him over onto the bed. 

He was breathless and panting, cheeks flushed and pupils blown, lips sheened and plumped, looking up at him with hooded eyes, cock straining through the front of his underwear, a slight damp spot on the lace.

As if there was any possibility that Shiro wasn’t about to eat this man out until he came. 

Shiro settled between his legs, hooking Lance’s thighs over his shoulders, burying his face back against his ass, lapping at the underside of his balls where they hung out of the panties where Shiro held them to the side, sucking at the flesh and making Lance gasped harshly, hips jumping.

Shiro licked down his perineum, sucking back at his hole, nibbling a little at his rim and groaning softly as Lance buried his hand back in Shiro’s hair, tugging as he moaned. 

Shiro hummed, sliding his other hand up to toy with the head of Lance’s cock, through the lace at first, a little precum seeping out and staining the material, before Shiro took pity on him, pulling the waistband down and pulling his cock out, slowly running his hand over it as he ate him out.

Lance was giving a constant stream of desperate moans at this point, one arm thrown across his face and the other buried tightly into Shiro’s hair, tugging with each harsh gasp, hips jumping and hole clenching around Shiro’s tongue in anticipation. 

“Shiro, Shiro, Shiro…” He moaned, half sounding like a sob as precum seeped from his cock, Shiro spreading it down his shaft as he jerked him off, thumbing through his slit as Lance’s body jerked, cock jumping in his hand as it leaked more. 

Shiro hummed against him, moaning as he fucked him with his tongue, wondering at this point how mad Lance would be if he just ripped the delicate material from his body. 

“S-Shiro- _please_ , gonna cum-” He gasped, cock jumping again in his hand, throbbing as Shiro stroked him, hips rocking and hole clenching, only taking two more strokes of his cock before he released, spilling over his abdomen with a cry that sounded more like a sob, rocking his hips as he rode it out.

Shiro finally pulled away, breathless and panting himself as he stroked Lance’s cock, working him through it before finally slowing his hand.

Lance’s arm was still thrown across his face as he tried to catch his breath, chest heaving as he came down from it, cock resting against his hip as Shiro let it go, pushing Lance’s legs apart and running his hands over his thighs.

“Was that okay?” He asked with a soft hum, a self satisfied smirk on his face at the groan that Lance gave, nodding. 

“So good.” He said breathlessly, finally looking up at him with a tired smile 

“You good to go again?” Shiro asked teasingly and Lance snorted.

“Please, you did see that video, didn’t you?”

Lance didn’t have to specify for Shiro to know which video he was talking about.

“Mm, I liked that one.” Shiro hummed. 

“You gonna make me fuck myself open, Shiro?” Lance teased, opening Shiro’s bedside drawer to get out the lube. 

Shiro scoffed, taking it from him. “As if.” He said, coating his fingers and pushing Lance’s thighs apart, pressing his fingers against Lance’s wet hole and pressing two into him straight away.

Lance gave a satisfied sigh, letting his eyes fall back closed and dangling one leg off of the bed in his attempt to spread his legs wider for Shiro. 

Shiro spread him open on his fingers, thrusting them into him, crooking them inside of him, pressing a kiss to his hip bone as Lance gasped, hips rocking.

“Okay?” Shiro asked softly, rubbing his fingers over Lance’s prostate, looking up at him as Lance panted, biting on his lip and giving a quick nod.

“U-uh huh.” He moaned, rocking his hips and reaching down to brush Shiro’s hair from his face. 

Shiro hummed, pressing a third finger into him and spreading them inside of him. He reached with his other hand to wrap around Lance’s cock, jerking him off quickly, bringing the tip of his cock to his lips as he stretched him, slicking his tongue through his slit and sucking on his tip as Lance whimpered.

“Please, please…” He moaned, hips stuttering and Shiro hummed, crooking his fingers into Lance’s prostate and firmly pressing over it, Lance crying out softly.

“Hm?” He asked in a soft tease, looking up at him. 

“Shiro…” Lance grumbled, breath hitching as Shiro flicked his tongue teasingly over the head of his cock and giving a soft moan. “Fuck me… please, fuck me, I’m ready.”

“Oh?” Shiro asked, tilting his head and kissing down his shaft. “This not enough for you, baby?” He asked, rubbing firmly over his prostate a few times.

Lance whined desperately, shaking his head. “Want your cock, please, plase, waited so long, want it so bad…” 

Shiro nearly gave in, and he was incredibly proud of himself for managing to resist him, continuing to tease him somehow much more alluring for the time being. 

“Oh? But I thought… you’re used to taking so many cocks, aren’t you, baby? Used to taking so many cocks that are so _so_ big in that pretty little hole of yours…? Why ever would you be waiting for mine?” He teased.

“Shiro- Shiro, give it to me _please_ , they’re not you- they’re not you, fuck, please, I want you, don’t make me beg like this, you asshole…”

Shiro chuckled, thrusting his fingers against his prostate a few more times in retaliation and Lance whimpered, biting down on his lip to try and muffle his cries.

“I think I’m allowed to make you beg, angel.” Shiro hummed. “I’ve also been waiting… and I said I was going to make you sob.”

“Make me sob on your cock then, dick.” Lance whined, hips stuttering and Shiro hummed.

“Okay, fine, fine.” He conceded, pulling his fingers from Lance’s ass and coating his cock with lube. 

Lance gave a relieved huff, wrapping his legs around Shiro’s waist as Shiro lifted his hips, lining up to his entrance and slowly pressing into him. 

“Oh fuck…” Lance groaned softly, reaching out to gasp onto Shiro’s arms, weakly trying to pull Shiro down over him, messily pressing their lips together, and moaning into his mouth, sucking Shiro’s bottom lip into his mouth and Shiro groaned softly.

“Lance, baby…” Shiro moaned, pulling back for a moment to look at him, face flushed and screwed up in pleasure, panting softly as Shiro bottomed out, gripping on to his shoulders to keep him close and giving tiny little whimpers.

He was gorgeous. He was stunning, absolutely beautiful and Shiro had no choice but to kiss him again, diving in to catch his lips, nipping at them and swallowing Lance’s eager moans as he began to rock into him, pulling his cock out and pushing it back in. 

“You’re gorgeous.” Shiro murmured as he pressed kisses along his jaw until his lips were pressed to the shell of his ear. 

Lance moaned softly. “That’s- not usually what people tell me.” He said breathlessly.

“They should.” Shiro said back, pressing a kiss to the skin under his ear, before sucking the lobe into his mouth. 

Lance whined, wrapping his limbs around Shiro more firmly, moaning and rocking against him as Shiro thrust into him. 

“Usually- you feel so good- sound so slutty-” He said and Shiro gave a soft growl. 

“You’re gorgeous.” He said. “Stunning. Take my breath away.”

Lance gave a breathless moan, curling his fingers in Shiro’s hair and dragging his head up to messily press their lips back together, moaning into his mouth and quickly slipping his tongue inside.

Shiro moaned, letting Lance explore his mouth, sucking on his tongue and drawing a soft whine from him, hand sliding down to grip at his hip, shifting him a little and thrusting deeply into him, Lance shuddering under him and gasping harshly as he brushed against his prostate. 

“Fuck…” Lance whimpered, digging his heels into Shiro’s back to pull him closer.

“You _do_ feel so good wrapped around my cock.” Shiro murmured into Lance’s mouth, swallowing the sharp gasp that followed. “You _do_ sound so slutty.” He continued, smiling against his lips and giving a soft nip. “But you’re so much more than that.” 

Lance whimpered, rocking his hips and clenching around him, reaching to take Shiro’s wrist and guide it to his cock, Shiro quickly wrapping around him and jerking him off. 

Lance whined, moaning breathlessly as Shiro fucked hard into him, quickly stroking his cock in time with his thrusts and nipping at his lips, kissing down his throat and sucking and biting at the skin until it marked.

“Shiro, ‘m gonna cum, Shiro, please…” Lance gasped as Shiro hit against his prostate again, cock leaking over his hand as he worked it. 

“Cum angel, please, cum for me.” Shiro moaned, fucking into him harder. 

Lance whimpered, crying out loudly as he came, arching into Shiro and spilling over his hand, moaning raggedly as Shiro worked his cock through it, thrusts of his cock unrelenting. 

Shiro groaned as Lance tightened around him, fucking into him deeply as he chased his own pleasure, rutting his cock into him and groaning against his neck.

“Shiro- Shiro, please, please…” Lance moaned, a soft sob falling from his lips as Shiro fucked hard against his prostate, making sure to keep aiming there as he continued his thrusts, Lance’s cries getting needier and needier as he was overstimulated.

Shiro moaned, biting into Lance’s shoulder as he came, spilling deep inside of him, rutting into him as he rode his orgasm out, Lance giving another small sob as he clutched tightly to him.

They panted together as they came down from their orgasms, Shiro reluctantly pulling out of him and collapsing on the bed next to him, pulling Lance against his chest. 

Lance gave a soft sigh, melting against him and snuggling down, burying his face in the crook of Shiro’s neck and throwing an arm around his waist. 

So the cuddling wasn’t just a we’re-not-going-to-see-each-other-for-six-months cuddle. Lance didn’t do cuddling after sex, but Lance still cuddled with him. Maybe that was a good sign… or maybe it was just familiarity. 

Lance snuggled into him as Shiro pulled him closer, pressing a kiss to his head and giving a tired sigh. 

“How long are you here for?” Lance murmured, pressing a kiss to his chest. 

“A week, maybe. A little longer.” He said. 

Lance didn’t reply and there was a heaviness in the air. 

“Come with us.” Shiro quietly offered again. 

Lance gave a small intake of breath and didn’t say anything, turning his face into Shiro’s chest. 

“It can be for as long as you want, we can drop you back whenever you want.”

“I’d put you off course.” Lance offered quietly. 

“I’d still do it.” Shiro countered, equally as softly. “It’s not forever, Lance. Just… the last two months.”

Lance didn’t say anything for a long moment and then looked at him with a lopsided smile. “You’re thinking with your dick, captain.”

“I’m not.” Shiro said earnestly. 

Lance rolled his eyes. “Yes, you are. Of course you are. You don’t _actually_ want me to come, you just want someone to fuck.”

Shiro frowned. “Is that really what you think of me? Of us? Do you think I would talk to you on the phone each night if I just wanted you for sex? I care about you, and I care about our friendship.”

Lance frowned softly back and then gave a small nod. “Okay. I’ll come.” He said softly, biting his lip. 

“You will?” Shiro asked, a dumb smile spreading across his face. 

“Yeah.” Lance said, giving him a soft smile in return. 

“I’m glad.” Shiro said softly and then opened his mouth to say something else, but Lance laid a finger on his lips, leaning up to gently kiss over them. 

That was probably a good idea. Shiro did have a tendency to not be able to filter his thoughts when it came to Lance. The last thing he needed was to scare him off. 

They laid like that in a contented silence for a little while Lance tracing feather light patterns over Shiro’s chest, before Lance started uncomfortably shifting on the bed next to him. 

“You wanna get cleaned up?” He asked gently and Lance nodded. 

Shiro hummed, getting up and stretching, holding his hands out for Lance to help him up and pulling him against his chest, leaning down to peck his lips. 

Lance gave a soft giggle, leading him into the bathroom and switching the shower on, pulling Shiro inside.

It occured to Shiro that they had never showered together before. Every time, Lance had always deemed that it was time to go, got up and used the shower, and left.

Shiro hadn’t even been thinking about it when he got up, but Lance had pulled him in nonetheless, lathering his body with soap.

Shiro waited for him to finish, taking the soap from him and doing the same to his own, resisting the urge to put his hands on Lance anywhere he could; Lance had always done this himself, there was no reason he would want Shiro fumbling around trying to help. It was enough that he was allowing Shiro to be standing next to him while he did it.

Shiro suspected that Lance probably knew from his fidgeting, though, from the way he was looking at him with a knowing smirk. 

“You can wash my hair if you want to.” He offered and Shiro eagerly nodded, reaching for the shampoo as Lance wet his hair and began to lather it in. 

Lance took that opportunity to clean the cum out of himself, giving soft contented sighs and leaning into the press of Shiro’s fingers in a way that reminded him of a cat purring as it was being petted.

After they were finish Lance reluctantly turned the shower off, leaning against Shiro. 

“We could have a bath, if you want.” He offered and Lance raised an eyebrow. 

“We just showered.” He said and Shiro shrugged helplessly.

“It was just a thought.”

“That wasn’t a no.” Lance said quickly, getting out of the shower and going over to the bath, putting the plug in and quickly filling it up. 

He pulled Shiro against him, looping his arms around his neck and they stood their like that holding each other and kissing lazily while they waited for the bath to fill. No intent, just… kissing, and it was nice. 

Lance sighed softly as Shiro pressed a trail of open mouthed kisses down his neck, nuzzling into the crook of it and he gave a soft laugh, gently stroking the back of his head and tilting his head to the side for him. 

Shiro sighed contentedly back, trailing his hands over Lance’s sides and peppering his skin with loving kisses until Lance pulled away, turning the water off.

Shiro got in first, leaning back against the tub and opening his arms for Lance, who quickly stepped in after him, leaning back against him and turning his face to nuzzle the underside of his jaw.

Shiro gently wrapped his arms around him, stroking slow lazy patterns over Lance’s skin, and neither of them said anything, just enjoying the warmth of the bath and each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew that took,, a hot minute to edit
> 
> Hopefully around a week or so for ch3 but I _am_ on holiday rn so I’m a bit slower than usual (also idk if u noticed but it’s now 4 chapters not 3)
> 
> Comments are greatly appreciated I hope u enjoyed !!!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shiro jumped a little, focusing his gaze away from the empty doorway and onto her. 
> 
> “Veronica. What can I do for you?” He asked, trying not to sound too distracted.
> 
> “I think it’s time you and I had a little chat, Captain.” She said, pursing her lips. 
> 
> Shiro blinked and then swallowed as he realised what she meant. “Right. Yes. Okay.” He said. Yes, the you-fuck-my-little-brother-into-the-mattress-nightly-talk.
> 
> “What’s going on?” She asked expectantly.
> 
> “What- what do you mean what’s going on?” Shiro asked, brows furrowing in confusion. He was pretty sure that after yesterday it was very obvious what was going on. 
> 
> “I mean… is this still a casual thing? It doesn’t seem very casual.”
> 
> “Oh.” Shiro said, frowning harder. “I um, I don’t really- know how to answer that.”

They set Lance up with his own room, but he didn’t use it. He’d spent every night since their take off in Shiro’s bed, curled against his side. 

It wasn’t that Shiro hadn’t had a sex life like this in a long time, no. It was that Shiro had _never_ had a sex life like this. Like, ever. He was having multiple orgasms a day, and getting to hold Lance close against him at night and he didn’t know whether it was the novelty of it, or that they’d missed each other, but Shiro didn’t want it to stop. 

He really, _really_ didn’t want it to stop. 

He didn’t know what Lance got up to during the day, wandering around the Atlas, and sometimes he’d see him and receive a bright smile and a wave, but mostly Lance tried to keep out of his way while he was working. 

And Shiro appreciated that, really he did. There was no way that he would be able to resist him; he just wasn’t a strong enough man. Lance took up most of his waking thoughts and he wanted to be around him whenever he could, so one of them at least needed to have self restraint. 

There was, of course, the lingering awareness in the back of his mind that these were unrequited feelings. That it wasn’t necessarily Lance having self restraint versus Lance just not having the overwhelming need to spend every minute of every day with Shiro. 

But Lance was warm and touchy feely and flirty back, so Shiro could fool himself quite nicely into thinking that this was something that it wasn’t. That Lance… was more invested in this than he actually was. 

It didn’t matter though, not really. They would only be out here for another two months and then things would change. They’d go their separate ways again and this would have to stop. Maybe Lance would want to keep it casual and Shiro would have to go along with it, and then Lance would figure out how he felt. 

If Lance didn’t know already.

Shiro tended to try and not dwell on his feelings, reluctant to explore them any more than he already had, lest this become something of a painful experience. Right now, he was completely contented with having everything that Lance gave him, greedily taking whatever he could and knowing that he’d never quite have it this good again. 

He was allowed to enjoy this, sue him. He was allowed to enjoy having Lance all to himself while this lasted.

And if later down the line Shiro would have to go back to watching Lance get dicked down by aliens that were far more hung than himself… well, Shiro would cross that bridge when he came to it. Right now, it was _his_ cock that Lance was begging for. _His_ cock that Lance would suck the moment he woke up, looking at him with that tantalising smile as he teased his shaft, teasing him awake until Shiro sleepily buried a hand in his hair and guided his head over his cock, lazily thrusting up into his mouth until he came.

Right now, Shiro got more of Lance than anyone else did. And by god, if he wasn’t going to hold onto that as tightly as he could. 

The whole crew knew, oh, there was no doubt about that. The teasing grins that Lance would give him across the room and the way Shiro felt his cheeks burn. He wished that there was a way for him to take charge and be in control, like the way he could shove Lance down and make him beg for his cock, but in the end… 

Lance was always the one on top, Lance was always the one in control, and Lance had Shiro completely wrapped around his little finger and he absolutely knew it.

Except, everyone else knew it, too, and it was utterly mortifying. 

Even in bed, Shiro only had control because Lance gave it to him. Only able to make Lance beg because he let him. Lance could say the word and it would all be over, without a doubt, just like that. 

Shiro didn’t have such a privilege. 

He didn’t think he’d be able to push Lance away even if he tried, even if he _wanted_ to. There was such an undeniable pull that had him always, always running back to him. 

Shiro had always been running, he didn’t think at this point, he knew how to stop. But now he wasn’t just mindlessly running into space, no, diving head first into the unknown, into war. 

No. 

They were in space, sure, but that was just second best, these days. That was merely _circumstance_. Shiro was running towards Lance, always running, running, and he didn’t know how to stop, didn’t _want_ to stop, and he knew that the fallout would be bad when it came.

There was no doubt about that, Shiro was running full speed ahead into heartbreak. But he couldn’t stop, didn’t want to, just kept running towards Lance, Lance, Lance. 

Always Lance. 

Shiro didn’t think that he’d ever fallen for someone so hard or so fast, but there wasn’t a way to stop it or slow it down, not with Lance constantly in his space, lip curling into that teasing smirk that stopped Shiro’s heart then and there without fail every time. 

And the worst part of all was that it wasn’t just the sex. If it was just the sex then maybe it would be okay, maybe Shiro would be able to deal with that, but it wasn’t.

It was the sleepy little mumbles that Lance gave just before he woke up, the way his brows pinched together in discontentment, like he would have done anything to just have a few more minutes. 

It was the way his eyes lit up as he dragged Shiro around on the planet surface, eagerly showing him this and that, and babbling on to him, and Shiro could have listened to him all day. 

It was his little stifled yawns when he was trying to let Shiro have a little longer before bed, didn’t want to drag him away yet and it was the way his cuffs fell over his wrists as he delicately held his mug of hot chocolate or tea in the evenings.

It was the knowing smiles he would get from pretty much the entirety of his crew every time Lance left the room and Shiro’s gaze lingered on the empty doorway just a little too long. 

It was everything, all at once, and Shiro thought that if they never had sex again he wouldn’t care, as long as he got to keep Lance snugly wrapped up in his arms. He really, _really_ wouldn’t. 

That was the final nail in the coffin, really, that realisation. That Shiro wanted everything, wanted all of this and maybe it had started off as sex but sex was just… sex was just a part of this, the least important part (even if his dick may disagree). 

He certainly wasn’t complaining though when Lance grabbed him in the hallway from his lunch break, pulling him into one of the cramped supply closets and pushing him against the wall, practically attacking his lips with his own. 

“Lance-” Shiro said, muffled against the press of his lips as Lance pressed their bodies together, slotting his thigh in between Shiro’s legs and fisting his hands in the collar of his shirt. 

“Mm?” Lance asked, only pulling away enough to messily kiss down his throat, lips catching on the collar of his shirt.

“Lance- what?” Shiro asked distractedly, hands sliding down to cup Lance’s ass and drinking in his moan, still belatedly trying to figure out what was going on and just how he ended up in here with Lance all over him. 

“Missed you.” Lance mumbled, running his hands down Shiro’s chest to the waistband of his pants. “M horny, wanna suck your cock.” 

Shiro gave an embarrassingly pitiful whimper at that, brain _still_ being a bit slow on the uptake. 

Then Lance was on his knees, unbuckling his belt and pulling his pants down, cock already filling out in his underwear by the time Lance was pressing wet open mouthed kisses over the fabric.

“Lance…” He moaned softly, head tipping back against the wall as he stroked through Lance’s hair. 

Lance hummed around him in response, before pulling the waistband of his underwear down and taking his cock in hand.

It only took a few strokes of his hand before Shiro was fully hard and panting in anticipation. He couldn’t see Lance, half because his eyes were closed, and half because it was pitch black in the closet, but his breath hitched at each feather light teasing brush of his lips over his shaft.

“Lance, baby, don’t tease…” Shiro moaned softly, Lance giving a small giggle, before taking the head of his cock into his mouth and sucking. 

Shiro groaned, petting Lance’s hair encouragingly and Lance moaned around him, for once, doing as he was told and stopping the teasing, taking more of Shiro’s cock into his mouth as he sank down onto the length.

He bobbed his head a few times to get used to the stretch, carefully taking in more each time until his nose was pressed against Shiro’s abdomen and his cock had slipped into his throat. 

Lance swallowed around him and Shiro whimpered, Lance’s throat convulsing tightly around his cock and his fingers curled in Lance’s hair, tightening their grip a little. 

Lance pulled off, and Shiro could feel his smirk against the tip of his cock, gently lapping over his tip, clearly having decided that teasing him what a much more interesting route to go down, bringing one hand to play with his balls and giving a gentle moan as Shiro tugged on his hair.

Shiro didn’t have to be able to see Lance to know the smug expression he had on his face, grumbling softly and using his grip in his hair to pull him down onto his cock, Lance thankfully giving in and parting his lips as Shiro pushed his cock forwards into Lance’s mouth. 

Lance whined softly and Shiro was grateful that he had Lance’s face-fucking kink to use to his advantage. 

He didn’t stop until Lance’s nose was pressed against his abdomen and his cock had slipped into his throat, holding Lance down until he could feel his throat convulsing around him, and then some, before finally letting him go. Lance pulled off, coughing and spluttering and lightly slapping Shiro’s thigh. 

“You liked it.” Shiro said, voice low and rough and Lance didn’t say anything in response, just giving a small huff.

Shiro took that as a victory. 

Lance brought his cock back to his lips, seemingly determined to do as he pleased and not let Shiro have his way with him, teasingly pressing wet kisses down his shaft and sucking his balls into his mouth, moaning around them as he sucked softly, before releasing them with a wet pop and kissing back up to the tip of his cock.

Shiro gave a ragged moan, hand still held tightly in Lance’s hair, but not doing anything to guide him, just letting him do as he pleased, figuring that if he was going to tease like this, then Lance could pay for it later.

Lance teased over his cock with more wet kisses, flicking his tongue through his slit a few times in a way that had Shiro shuddering, before taking him back into his mouth, sinking down on to his cock with a moan, bobbing his head and taking more and more into his mouth as he went until his nose was once again nestled against his pelvis.

Lance went back to teasing after that, moving his lips wetly over his cock, up and down his shaft, fingers teasingly playing with his balls all the while, before sucking just the tip into his mouth and Shiro wanted nothing more than to shove himself deep into Lance’s throat.

So he did, giving Lance a few more moments before tightening his grip in his hair to hold him in place and thrusting forwards into his mouth. Lance gave a moan of surprise, slacking his jaw obediently for him as Shiro began to thrust in, lazily at first, just enjoying the sensation with soft little groans, before picking up the pace, pulling Lance down over his cock to meet his thrusts.

Shiro knew he wasn’t going to last long like that, he never did. Not with Lance making such pretty little noises for him, the slap of his balls against his chin echoing in the small dark room, Lance so wet and hot around him, whimpering and eagerly taking in each of his thrusts. Shiro knew how much he loved having a cock down his throat. 

Lance was whimpering beneath him, taking Shiro’s cock so well with each rough thrust, Shiro groaning softly each time his cock slipped into his throat, panting. 

He didn’t give Lance a warning; he didn’t deserve it with all that teasing, just pulled Lance down all the way, holding him there as he came thickly, straight down his throat, holding Lance down until he was finished, making sure he swallowed each drop before finally letting him pull off, spluttering and gasping for air with a soft whimper. 

“I need to get back to work.” Shiro said gruffly and Lance gave a small pitiful whimper. 

“You’re just gonna leave me?” He asked in a soft whine, and Shiro really wished that he could see how wrecked Lance looked on the floor beneath him, probably gripping his aching cock through his pants.

“You shouldn’t mess around during work hours, Lance.” Shiro said disapprovingly. “I suggest you go and deal with it yourself.”

Lance grumbled, standing up and weakly slapping Shiro’s chest. 

“You’re a dick.” He moaned grumpily and Shiro just chuckled, blindly reaching to cup Lance’s face and pull him in for a soft kiss.

“Be good for me, and you might get a treat later, hm?” He said softly, feeling Lance’s huff against his lips before capturing them again.

“Okay.” He agreed softly, gently biting down on Shiro’s bottom lip. “You’d better follow through on that.”

“Don’t worry, beautiful. I intend to.” He murmured, tucking himself back into his pants and zipping them up, retucking his shirt in and brushing it down, before opening the door and letting himself out.

He didn’t dare look back at Lance who was surely now illuminated by the hallway lights and looking thoroughly wrecked, because Shiro knew that if he did then he would have no choice but to drag him right back to their room and wreck him for positively hours. He wouldn’t be able to control himself, and he couldn’t afford that. 

He walked out, clearing his throat and back to the common room to eat his lunch, frowning as a few of his coworkers turned to him with wide eyes. 

“What?” He asked self consciously. Could they somehow… tell what had just happened? He and Lance weren’t a secret, but… 

“Um.” One of them said with a cough, biting his lip. 

Shiro followed his gaze past himself, turning around to see Lance coming in with a cocky smile on his face. 

A cocky smile- smeared with bright red lipstick. All over the lower half of his face. 

Oh. 

“You’ve got a little something, Captain.” He said with a smirk, coming over and dusting off his shirt collar, Shiro looking down to find that also smeared with red. 

Shiro huffed, glaring at him and pursing his lips. 

“You might wanna put that in the wash, I heard it stains.” He said, gently rubbing his thumbs over the red marks with a concerned frown.

Shiro grit his teeth, knowing his cheeks were flushed. Knowing he and Lance were screwing around was one thing, but to have Lance send him back in here covered in lipstick was completely another- it was mortifying. 

Lance leaned in, pressing his lips to the shell of Shiro’s ear. “I wonder if there are stains on your cock.” He murmured and Shiro snapped. 

He grabbed onto his wrist, dragging him from the room with barely a glance backwards. He didn’t care if he ran over his lunch break, he was the goddamned captain of this ship, he could fucking well do what he wanted. 

He shoved Lance down the hall and into their room, Lance a breathless mess by the time they got there, already unbuttoning his shirt and pulling it off by the time Shiro shoved him down on to the bed. 

“Are you mad?” He asked breathlessly, legs falling easily open, chest heaving in anticipation. 

“Yes.” Shiro decided, though he was half finding it difficult to stay mad when Lance was looking up at him like that. 

No, Lance had- completely just done that. Lance had just pulled him away with the full intention of humiliating him in front of his entire crew. 

Lance looked up at him, biting his lip and fluttering his lashes. “I’m sorry.” He pouted.

“You’re _not_.” Shiro said, narrowing his eyes, and Lance’s lips curled into a smirk. 

“Whatcha gonna do about it, Captain?” He asked, taunting him- daring him. 

Shiro growled softly, flipping Lance roughly over on to his hands and knees unbuttoning his pants and pulling them down, along with his underwear, enough to expose the curve of his ass. 

He reached across to his bedside table, grabbing up the bottle of lube and quickly slicking his fingers, and sinking two into him, not taking much to open him up, quickly fucking them into him and spreading them inside of him and sinking a third into him.

Lance whimpered, rocking back against him and moaning, Shiro stretching him for a few more moments before pulling his fingers out and unbuttoning his pants just enough to get his cock out, slicking hit and sinking into him in one swift thrust.

Lance gasped softly, pressing his face into the sheets and moaning as Shiro gripped his hips, immediately pulling his cock out and thrusting back in, groaning lowly. 

He didn’t waste any time, setting a rough pace, knowing that this was what Lance had wanted, this had been the whole point- to rile Shiro up enough to take him nice and hard and rough. 

So he gave him what he wanted, even now, when Shiro was the one pounding Lance into the mattress until he was a moaning mess, Lance was still the one in control, Lance was still the one that had orchestrated this and had Shiro wrapped around his little finger, completely at his beck and call to obey his every whim and desire.

God, here Shiro was right now, fucking into Lance’s tight heat instead of having his lunch break and then going back to work. Because he would definitely stay here and cuddle with Lance for a little bit, after, and maybe have a bath with him, or a shower at least. 

So this was terrible, really, that Shiro was so weak to him. Should have come back here and changed his shirt, not taken Lance back here and fucked him. 

The worst part was that Shiro didn’t have any regrets. He’d do it all over again. And the part even worse than that was that Shiro could have Lance any time he wanted. So he didn’t _need_ to be fucking him now, but here he was.

Pushing Lance down into the mattress, one hand on his hip, the other at the back of his neck, keeping his face down as he fucked his cock roughly into his ass, Lance moaning into the sheets and clutching them in his fists, making weak attempts to rock back against his cock, moaning desperately as Shiro pushed him into the mattress. 

Shiro fucked deeply into him, groaning as Lance whimpered beneath him, squirming to bring a hand around to wrap around his cock but Shiro batted it away, grabbing onto his wrists and pulling them behind his back, holding them both in one hand as he fucked him. No, Shiro would have at least that much control. 

Except then again, that was probably what Lance wanted, everything was orchestrated to get what he wanted. Shiro knew how Lance loved to be thrown about, roughly held in place, so maybe he didn’t even want to touch himself, just wanted Shiro to restrain him and fuck him harder. 

Shiro gave a soft growl, fucking into him harder anyway, he couldn’t help it, listening to Lance’s punched out gasp, giving a pitiful whine as a constant stream of moans spilled from his lips. 

Shiro knew when Lance was close from the way his hole was fluttering around him, barely able to get out a coherent word before he was clenching down on him, spilling onto the bed and whimpering.

Shiro fucked him through it, groaning as Lance tightened around him, milking his own orgasm from him, Shiro groaning deeply as he fucked into him, spilling inside of him and fucking him through it, before slowing to a stop, panting and slumping over him a little, loosening his grip on his wrists. 

Lance whined, breathing heavily and squirming a little before Shiro pulled out of him, flopping down onto the bed beside him and pulling Lance against his chest.

“Are you still mad?” Lance asked, voice soft as he snuggled against him, looking up at him. 

Shiro huffed out a breath, wrapping his arms around him and holding him close, nuzzling against Lance’s hair and pressing a soft kiss there.

“You’re a menace.” He mumbled. 

Lance smiled and pressed a kiss to Shiro’s chest. 

“I should be at work.” 

Lance shook his head. “No, should be here with me.” He said, pouting. 

“That was-” He huffed. “That was really embarrassing, Lance.”

Lance pouted and looked up at him and Shiro softened. Lance looked so unfairly cute like that.

“Are you gonna take your clothes off to cuddle?” Lance asked with a small smile and Shiro groaned softly, nodding and slowly taking his clothes off as Lance did the same, before turning over, facing Lance and pulling him against his chest.

“Better?” He asked gruffly, lips pressed against Lance’s shoulder.

“Mmmmhm.” Lance nodded, snuggling against him. 

“I’m gonna get a lot of shit for this, you know.” 

“You’re the captain.” Lance said airily, gently lacing his fingers through Shiro’s hair. “They can give you shit but that’s all they can do.”

“Mmmm, there could be a mutiny. They could throw me out to space and take over.” He said with a soft laugh and Lance snorted.

“Yeah, yeah, they love you too much for that.”

“Mm, maybe if I keep slacking off because my dick tells me to they won’t.”

“Oh, is that what happened?” Lance teased. “Did he give you a message?”

Shiro rolled his eyes, smiling. “Mmmhm. It was; need to fuck Lance, _immediately_.”

“Well, I’d say that’s a pretty good message.” He hummed. 

“Oh, I’m sure. You shouldn’t do things during the day like that.” He reprimanded softly, burying his face in the crook of Lance’s neck. “It’s not fair on everyone else.”

“I won’t do it agaaaain.” Lance said with a hum. “I was just really horny.” He pouted.

Shiro smiled affectionately against his skin. “You can’t just come and whisk me away whenever you’re horny.”

Lance pouted, making a soft grumbling noise. “But I wanted to… I wanted to suck your cock and I wanted everyone to know that I’m the one who gets to have you.”

That gave Shiro pause. 

“Really?” He asked softly, holding Lance a little tighter.

“Uh huh. They all fancy you, you know…” He said with a hum. 

Shiro frowned. “No they don’t.”

“Yes they do. You don’t see them all looking at you when you’re not looking. Like, at least half the crew fancy you. But I’m the one that gets to touch you and make you moan and make you cum. I’m the one you wanna fuck, not them.” 

That really, really gave Shiro pause.

Shiro didn’t really know what to say to that, just burying himself further against Lance and nuzzling him, pressing a soft kiss to his skin. 

Shiro hadn’t… considered that Lance might feel like that. It was always Shiro. Always Shiro wanting to hold onto Lance, wanting to feel jealous and possessive over him. That Lance might screw around with hung aliens, but _he_ was the one that got to hold Lance like this, _he_ was the one that got to wake up to Lance. _He_ was the one that got to have Lance over and over again whenever he wanted to. 

But… to consider that maybe Lance felt a little jealous and possessive, too. Well, that was a thought path that Shiro didn’t particularly want to go down. He didn’t like getting caught up in his head, especially not when he had other things to focus on, like the man wrapped up in his arms, humming softly and stroking his fingers through his hair. 

He got to have Lance like this. 

And Lance… got to have him like this? 

Shiro hadn’t really considered that he was someone worth having. Someone worth showing off, like that, and the thought made him smile a bit. 

He found he quite liked feeling like he was worth something to Lance. Like he was something to be proud of. Like Lance was saying a big fuck you to everyone else, _he’s mine_.

Except while Shiro was Lance’s completely and utterly in every sense of the word, he wasn’t officially.

Officially, they didn’t belong to each other and this was just a temporary and casual arrangement. 

And that was fine. 

Shiro knew that he should speed this up, get them in the shower as quickly as possible, but he really didn’t want to. He wanted to lay here and hold Lance in the afterglow of sex for as long as he possibly could. Especially when the alternative was returning to work. 

Holding Lance for hours upon hours seemed like a much better option. 

So he didn’t move, didn’t say anything, just let them lay there wrapped up in each others arms, Shiro pressing soft kisses in the curve of Lance’s neck and Lance tenderly playing with Shiro’s hair as he hummed gentle nothings. 

“Baby, as much as I am loving this, I’m getting kind of uncomfortable.” Lance murmured a little while later and Shiro smiled at the endearment, having to take a moment to look past that and comprehend the rest of what Lance had said. 

“Hm?”

“Your cum.” He whispered with a soft giggle and Shiro huffed a laugh against his skin. 

Shiro reluctantly disentangled himself from Lance, scooping him up off of the bed and into his arms, Lance smiling softly and looping his arms lazily around Shiro’s neck, burying his face in the crook of it and let Shiro carry him into the bathroom. 

“Shower?” He asked softly and Lance nodded. He set him down and turned on the water, washing Lance’s hair for him as he cleaned himself out. 

When he was done he leant back against Shiro, twisting in his arms and looping his arms back around his neck with a soft sigh. 

Lance wasn’t usually this clingy after sex, but Shiro wasn’t complaining. He lathered both of their bodies with soap and washed them off while Lance stood draped against him, and then Shiro switched the water off, carrying Lance out and drying him off, and then himself. 

He carried him back to bed, laying him down and pulling off the top cover that was dirtied with cum, pulling the other blankets over him. 

“We should start putting down a towel.” Shiro commented softly as Lance curled up back in his arms, giving a sleepy nod as he snuggled against him.

“Mm, probably.” He mumbled.

“Gonna have a nap, baby?” He asked softly and Lance nodded. “Okay.” He said, gently stroking soft patterns into Lance’s skin.

“Gonna stay?” He asked in a small sleepy voice and Shiro should have said no, should have gone back to work, but how could he? How could he when Lance sounded like that? Looked like that? 

“Yeah, I’m gonna stay.” Shiro agreed softly, stroking over his skin and holding him close, pressing a kiss to his forehead.

Shiro could tell when Lance fell asleep, breathing evening and going a little limper in his arms, but Shiro held him close, snuggling down a little further in the bed and falling asleep not long after him. 

 

***

 

Shiro wasn’t sure what the time was when they woke up, but he suspected they’d been asleep for a good few hours. His stomach was growling and so was Lance’s, and Shiro belatedly realised that he’d never got to have his lunch. 

He shifted a little and yawned, Lance whining unhappily in his sleep at the movement, snuggling closer to him. 

It was a few minutes before Lance came to, yawning and pouting, trying to bury himself further against Shiro to get some more sleep. 

“Come on, Lance, we should get some food. We’ve wasted enough time.”

Lance made a small unhappy noise at that. “Wasn’t wasted.”

Shiro smiled softly and kissed his head. “No, it wasn’t. But we should definitely eat.”

“Carry me?” He asked softly. 

“Okay.” Shiro agreed, disentangling himself from Lance to get some clean clothes for them both. 

Lance just about managed to dress himself without pouting and whining his way through it, holding his arms out for Shiro once he was dressed and Shiro quickly picked him up, carrying him out of their room and down the hall. 

It was strangely quiet through the corridors, which told Shiro that it was dinner time. He carried Lance to the dining room, where everyone turned expectantly with raised eyebrows as they came in. 

Shiro gave them a sheepish smile and a shrug, setting Lance down in a chair and kissing his head. He went to the kitchen quickly to retrieve their food, before bringing it back and giving Lance his, sitting down next to him. 

No one asked them where they’d been, but it was a mixture of knowing smug looks and knowing disappointed ones. 

Shiro found himself caring less and less as Lance gave him a lopsided sleepy smile, yawning and rubbing his eyes.

He was definitely the lucky one in this arrangement. 

Lance perked up a little after getting some food in him, chattering with some of the crew, and Shiro listened along, joining in when necessary. 

After that everyone dispersed, Lance slipping his hand into Shiro’s and leading him back to their room.

They changed into their pyjamas and fell into bed together, having settled into a nice routine since Lance had been here. 

Shiro picked up his tablet from his bedside table, lifting his arm for Lance to snuggle under and pulled up the book that they were currently reading together. 

Shiro read a little faster than Lance, trying not to give anything away accidentally as he read, waiting for Lance to tell him to skip to the next page each time. 

They continued like this until they’d read a chapter and then put it down, switching the light off and laying down, Lance keeping close to Shiro, nestling against him. 

“Tired?” Shiro asked softly, gently pressing a kiss to his head and stroking over his hip. 

Lance hummed, giving a small nod. “Yeah, kinda.”

“Mmm, okay, sleep well.” Shiro murmured. 

“You too.” Lance said softly back and then was quiet for a few minutes. “Am I forgiven?” He asked quietly, a small smile in his voice.

“You’re always forgiven.” Shiro said through a yawn.

“Shame, I was kind of hoping you’d punish me some more…” Lance pouted and Shiro huffed a laugh.

“I’m sure you’ll find another way of getting into trouble. Tell you what, here’s an instruction. I want to wake up naturally tomorrow, by myself, or by the alarm, think you can handle that?”

Lance gave a small sleepy giggle and nodded. “I think so.”

Shiro smiled to himself, and would have rolled his eyes if they weren’t already closed. That meant he’d be woken up with a blowjob. 

Neither of them said anything after that, slipping into an easy sleep a little while later.

 

***

 

It took Shiro a little while to register what was going on when he woke up, thoughts of the previous night’s conversation long gone. 

He frowned, brows pinching in confusion, hips already lazily thrusting upwards, chasing the warmth wrapped around him, a soft breathy groan escaping him.

It was right there- what was going on, he just couldn’t _quite_ grasp onto it. He knew what this was, knew this warmth, this feeling, he just couldn’t _quite_ -

“ _Lance_.” He gasped as Lance sank down completely onto his cock, sucking around him and then suddenly oh- oh, _oh fuck_.

He didn’t open his eyes yet, but slipped a hand down to bury in Lance’s hair, gently curling into the strands, not tugging, just gently petting as Lance sucked him. 

Lance hummed around him and Shiro whined, already feeling pitifully close, despite only having woken up a few mere moments earlier. 

God, Shiro couldn’t think of a better way to wake up than this, he must have been the luckiest guy in the universe to get _this_.

Lance was gently running his fingers over the insides of Shiro’s thighs, gently pushing them apart as he worked his cock, and Shiro had never been more grateful that he wasn’t teasing him like he normally loved to do. 

He wasn’t doing much of anything, to be honest, just slowly bobbing his head over him, taking his cock into his mouth over and over, Shiro weakly thrusting up, trying to chase the heat when it left. 

Usually, Shiro was much more coherent than this in the mornings after waking up, but right now he couldn’t comprehend anything. Couldn’t comprehend anything but the warmth of Lance’s mouth and his name on his tongue in a soft breathy chant.

“Lance, Lance, Lance…” He breathed, groaning softly as Lance brought him closer and closer, bringing his hands to gently play with his balls as he sucked around his cock, taking him deeply into his mouth for a few moments before going back to bobbing his head. 

Lance hummed in acknowledgement, looking up at him, and Shiro had only just registered that he’d managed to open his eyes, entranced by the movement of Lance’s head over him and the stroke of his fingers in his soft hair, still mussed from sleep. 

Shiro was panting, humping into Lance’s mouth with soft breathless groans, Lance rolling his balls between his fingers and moaning softly around him.

Shiro could barely manage to warn Lance, just tightening his grip in his hair as he moaned, hips bucking as he came down Lance’s throat, Lance moaning and taking more of Shiro’s cock into his mouth, swallowing it all and pulling off just in time for a few last spurts to coat his lips. 

“Good morning.” He murmured, voice a little raspy and Shiro huffed a tired laugh, just about ready to fall back asleep. 

“And a good morning it is.” He said back, raising an eyebrow and Lance snorted. “How long?”

“Mm, I’d say we have about fifteen minutes.”

“Come here, then.” Shiro said, patting his lap and Lance quickly clambered into it, straining against his pyjama pants, a large wet spot already on the front. “Eager, much?” He teased. 

Lance whined. “You know I like it…” 

“Know you like what?” Shiro asked, pulling his waistband down to wrap his fingers around Lance’s cock, Lance biting his lip and giving a soft sigh, eyes fluttering closed. “How much you love being stuffed full of cock?”

Lance whimpered, rocking his hips and pushing his cock into Shiro’s hand. If there was one thing that Shiro had discovered since they’d started all of this, was that Lance really, _really_ got off on Shiro calling him out for being such a slut, for being such a cockwhore.

“U-uh huh…” Lance whined, nodding as Shiro began to jerk him off.

“We should film another video, hm? Before we get disconnected again? Would you like that?” He asked and Lance gasped softly, rocking his hips and nodding. 

“Yes…” He whined.

“Mhm? What should we do for it? Mm, maybe we should wait until after lights out and take you down to my office. Dress you up like a cadet and then undress you and bend you over my desk and take you hard, have to shove something in your mouth to keep you quiet.”

“O-oh, yes, yes, fuck we should do that…” Lance moaned, nodding. “Fuck, yes, want you to punish me, Captain.”

“Yeah? You want your captain to punish you? Spank you, even? Fuck you nice and hard until you’re nothing but a crying mess. Just the Captain’s little _whore_. Except that’s not pretend, is it? You _are_ the Captain’s little whore. Wake me up with your lips wrapped around my cock, waiting here for me when I get back from work with that pretty little ass ready for me to fuck.”

Lance moaned needily, rocking his hips quickly as he leaked heavily over Shiro’s hand. “C-close.” He choked out. 

“That’s what you deserved for yesterday, really. Should have dragged you into my office instead of the bedroom, taken you hard enough so that _everyone_ knew you were getting what you deserved for being such a _little fucking slut_.”

Lance came hard with a high moan, spilling over Shiro’s hand and chest, head thrown back, rocking his hips and pushing his cock into Shiro’s hand as he worked him through it.

“There’s a good boy.” Shiro said softly as he slowed his hand, gently squeezing around Lance’s cock and drawing a whimper from him, before pulling Lance down against his chest and kissing his head.

“T-thought I was bad, ‘cause you asked me not to wake you up…” He said with a small smile as he buried his face in Shiro’s neck.

“Mm.” Shiro laughed softly, wrapping his arms around him. “I think you know full well that was just a sneaky way of getting a morning blowjob out of you.”

Lance made a small amused noise against his throat and nodded, giving a soft sigh and relaxing against him. 

“How long now?” 

“Mm, just over five minutes.”

Lance pouted. “Can’t we have a little longer?”

Shiro sighed, biting his lip. “Just five more, okay?” 

It was crazy really, how much Lance loved to cuddle, especially when he’d originally told Shiro that he didn’t do cuddling. It was enough to make him laugh, really; whenever they were alone Lance clung to him like a koala. 

And he was an incredibly weak man, and so if he had to shave five minutes off of his already short enough morning shower to get to hold Lance like this for them instead, then it was worth it. 

Shiro readjusted the alarm but it went off all too soon, Lance whining and snuggling closer to him. 

“Come on, baby, you gotta let me get up.” He said softly, gently stroking Lance’s back and Lance shook his head.

“Cuddle day.” He mumbled and Shiro smiled, kissing the side of his head. 

“As much as I would adore that, I am the Captain, and I have things to do.”

“You’re the _Captain_.” Lance said unhappily. “Take the day off.”

“You know that’s not how it works, sweetheart.” Shiro said, and Lance sighed sadly, before slowly peeling himself away from Shiro’s body and curling up on the bed, pouting. 

“Can I shower with you?” He asked with big eyes and Shiro melted, taking everything in him not to give in.

“I don’t trust you.” He said, narrowing his eyes playfully and Lance gave an exaggerated sigh.

“Fiiine.” He huffed, shooing Shiro away and into the bathroom. 

Shiro smiled, glancing back at Lance before going in and starting the shower up. He was quick in the shower, having to be after staying in bed a little longer, just quickly washing himself and his hair before getting out and brushing his teeth. 

Lance darted into the bathroom after Shiro came out to get dressed, hearing the shower start back up a few moments later.

It would probably be quicker for them both to just shower together in the mornings but Shiro really didn’t trust Lance not to start something and make them both incredibly late.

But Shiro also knew that if Lance _did_ , then he wouldn’t have the willpower to stop him, so it was better to just stop that before it started. He also… didn’t trust _himself_ not to start something. 

He was really, _really_ weak for Lance.

He was ready by the time Lance came out, Shiro standing back and enjoying watching Lance get dressed, Lance throwing a cheeky wink over his shoulder and making a bit of a show of it. 

After that they headed to breakfast together, mingling and saying good morning to the rest of the crew, before all sitting down to eat. 

Lance gave Shiro a small wave as everyone started to disperse and Shiro smiled, raising his hand in return, wishing that he could go over and give him a kiss. 

But it wasn’t like that. As much as it was absolutely like that, it wasn’t, not really. So Shiro kept up with whatever Lance wanted, however Lance wanted to take this, not pushing for more than he was given. 

The last thing he wanted was to scare Lance away, because what they had right now was really really good, and Shiro was desperately trying to hold onto it for as long as possible.

Last minute, Lance darted back over, quickly pulling Shiro in for a kiss, just a quick peck on the lips, but he lingered, smiling against each other, soft breaths against each other’s lips before Shiro pecked him back. 

Lance gave a small laugh, kissing him quickly once more and then rushing off. 

Shiro stood watching the doorway where he’d left for longer than he should have. 

So long that he didn’t notice Veronica standing right in front of him with her arms crossed and eyebrows raised until she cleared her throat.

Shiro jumped a little, focusing his gaze away from the empty doorway and onto her. 

“Veronica. What can I do for you?” He asked, trying not to sound too distracted.

“I think it’s time you and I had a little chat, Captain.” She said, pursing her lips. 

Shiro blinked and then swallowed as he realised what she meant. “Right. Yes. Okay.” He said. Yes, the you-fuck-my-little-brother-into-the-mattress-nightly-talk.

“What’s going on?” She asked expectantly.

“What- what do you mean what’s going on?” Shiro asked, brows furrowing in confusion. He was pretty sure that after yesterday it was very obvious what was going on. 

“I mean… is this still a casual thing? It doesn’t seem very casual.”

“Oh.” Shiro said, frowning harder. “I um, I don’t really- know how to answer that.” 

He didn’t. Technically, yes. Technically, this was a casual thing, technically, they were friends with benefits. Just hooking up, and nothing more. They slept in the same bed for convenience, because they fucked a lot, and Lance had developed a liking for cuddling, so things were a little more intimate. 

On top of the fact that they’d spent a good few years intimately close with only a select few other people around, and Lance was one of the few people that Shiro loved with his life even before all of this new stuff.

“You don’t know if this is casual or not.” She said, clearly unamused. 

“Um.” Shiro said, racking his brains to try and figure out how to explain things, feeling more intimidated by her than he felt he maybe should. “Have you um, have you talked to Lance about this?”

She huffed and rolled her eyes. “Lance doesn’t tell me anything. He said that you’re just hooking up and that’s all, but things seem a little more intimate than that.”

Shiro deflated a little at that. Right. Of course that’s what Lance had said. They _were_ just hooking up, after all. 

Maybe all of this was just… Lance being his normal self. Thinking back on it, Lance had always been draped over Hunk somehow back on the Castle of Lions. Always curled up against either him or Pidge whenever she would let him. 

Maybe it was just Lance being Lance. They were hooking up, Lance was being himself, and Shiro was being blindsided by his feelings.

“Right.” He said, still frowning as he bit his lip. “Well, um, yeah. We are just um, yeah.”

“You like him.” She observed.

“Of course I like him.” Shiro huffed, folding his arms across his chest. “I love him, he’s one of my closest friends.”

Veronica rolled her eyes. “You like him like him.”

Shiro pursed his lips. 

“Exactly. Are you going to tell him?”

Shiro sighed, rubbing his forehead. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but Lance isn’t exactly… emotionally available right now.”

Veronica raised an eyebrow, but Shiro didn’t know how better to explain it than that.

“He’s just not, okay? Can you trust me on that?”

“I think I know him better than you.” She challenged.

“Do you know what he does for a living?” Shiro asked, instantly regretting it as the words spilled out his mouth.

Veronica blinked at him, clearly thinking. “No. I don’t.” 

She didn’t ask, and it was just as well, because there was no way that Shiro was going to be the one to tell her. 

“I’m not…” Shiro sighed. “Things are fine as they are, and I’m not going to hurt him, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

She snorted. “Yeah, because you’re going to be the one doing the hurting.” She scoffed.

Ouch, okay. That hurt. That stung. Was that really necessary? To point out how clearly much more invested in this Shiro was than Lance? He knew she didn’t mean anything bad by it… But Shiro was feeling a little to delicate for Veronica’s brand of bluntness at the moment.

“Right.” Shiro said, bristling a bit. “Is there anything else you need?” 

She looked at him for a long moment and Shiro had to stop himself from recoiling under her stare. 

“No.” She said, shaking her head after a few moments. “Thank you, Captain.” She said, turning to leave.

Shiro sighed heavily, watching her go with a frown. He knew that she didn’t mean to be so blunt and harsh. He liked Veronica, she was a nice person and she always had the interests of others at heart.

She just… well, a bit like Lance, she didn’t have too much of a filter, and spoke what was on her mind. Shiro would just rather keep living inside his little bubble of happiness and ignorance, where he could pretend that this was a budding romance between the two, and everything that he was feeling, Lance was reciprocating.

It wasn’t hurting anyone to pretend. Only himself, but he was the only one that needed to be concerned with that. He’d happily hurt later if it meant that he could be this happy now, if it meant that he could have Lance like this now. 

Shiro shook his head, trying to clear it and heading into the common room to get a coffee before checking in with everyone, and heading down to his office to do some work. 

It wasn’t all too often that Shiro was hauled up in his office, mostly being out working on things with the crew, but sometimes there were boring things that couldn’t be avoided that Shiro had to take care of, and today was one of those days.

He left a little while later to get another coffee, not bumping into anyone, mind flitting briefly to where Lance may be and what he was up to, half (completely) wishing that he would drop by.

But it wasn’t like that, was it?

Lance wasn’t his boyfriend. Lance didn’t love him, Lance didn’t even have feelings for him, not like that. They were friends. Good friends, great friends. And they fucked. And that was that. 

Shiro tried to push it from his mind as they day went on, getting as much work down as he could and really, really trying to stave off thinking about Lance, whatever he may be doing, and wherever he may be.

Time really dragged, but then again, it always seemed to when he did office work. 

He was grateful when someone came to tell him to take his lunch break and he wandered down to the common room to pick up some lunch and eat, hoping that he didn’t look as much like a lost puppy as he felt as he waited and looked for Lance.

Lance didn’t come to lunch and Shiro wasn’t disappointed, really he wasn’t. Wasn’t constantly watching the door, no, not him. 

He was huffy as he ate his lunch, grumbling a little to himself before going back to his office to continue working. 

Lance wasn’t obligated to take his lunch break at the same time as him. Lance wasn’t obligated to be there whenever Shiro needed a little pick me up; just to see one of his smiles. 

Nevertheless, he made it through the rest of the day, running a tired hand through his hair as he tidied his desk, closing his office door and making his way back to his room. 

He stopped in the doorway as he opened it, wetting his lip, and grateful that his room was at the end of the corridor so that there was no chance of anyone walking past while he stood gaping in the doorway, trying to collect himself. 

“Welcome back, Captain.” Lance said silkily, lips curling. “How was work?”

His legs slid a little further apart as he spoke where he was laying on the bed, resting against the headboard, some sort of silky sheer fabric draped over him. Shiro wasn’t quite sure what it was, some sort of lingerie, strapped at the shoulders and meeting in the centre of his chest, before draping down over his abdomen to the sides, exposing it, and lipstick staining his lips red.

He had on a pair of panties, too. Not the lacy pink ones he’d worn before and that pretty much short circuited Shiro’s brain, because- Lance had _multiple_ pairs of panties, and he _hadn’t_ worn them yet for Shiro yet?

“Um.” Shiro said dumbly, finally managing to take a few steps in and close the door behind him. “A bit stressful, actually. Admin work.”

Lance nodded in understanding. “Well why don’t you come on over here then, and let me help, hm?”

Shiro nodded, slipping his jacket off and throwing it over the chair, walking over to the bed and raking his eyes over Lance’s body.

“See something you like, Captain?” Lance asked, the last part coming out a little breathily and Shiro wasn’t going to lie and say that wasn’t _really_ doing things to him. 

“You know I do.” Shiro replied and Lance hummed, lip curling as he knelt up and moved down the bed, pulling Shiro in by his collar, teasingly ghosting their lips together. 

“That’s what I’m here for, right, Captain? If you have a stressful day? Someone to come back to and fuck? Take your frustrations out on? The Captain’s _whore_?”

Shiro’s brows furrowed at that. That- that wasn’t what Lance was here for at all- he’d said that, but it wasn’t-

“Lance, what?” Shiro asked, trying to pull back a little. “That’s not-”

Lance huffed a small amused breath, pulling him back and gently sinking his teeth into Shiro’s lower lip. 

“Play along, _Captain_.” He murmured, letting go of Shiro’s collar to let his hands roam down Shiro’s chest to his waistband, unbuckling his belt tantalisingly slowly, and then unbuttoning and zipping his trousers.

Shiro nodded, letting Lance pull them down just enough to pull his cock out, guiding him to sit on the edge of the bed and sinking to his knees in front of him. 

“I’m sorry I didn’t see you at lunch.” Lance said, looking up at him through his lashes and Shiro wet his lip. 

“It’s okay.” Shiro said back, his day already pushed far from his mind at the sight of Lance on his knees in front of him, despite having seen him there many times before… Shiro thought that he could probably keep him there for the rest of his life and never get tired. 

“I was a little… preoccupied.” He said, raising an eyebrow and Shiro furrowed his own. 

“I mean, I figured.” 

Lance giggled softly, biting his lip. “No, I mean I was in here. I was supposed to wait a little, until it was closer to the end of the day, but I got too impatient. Spent lunch working myself open for you, went to lunch later with a plug in and I’ve been walking around all day like it. Just waiting for you to come back and stuff me full of your cock, Captain.”

Shiro swallowed thickly, cock jumping and Lance cooed.

“Ooh, you liked that.” He teased and Shiro was too overwhelmed thinking about that to glare at him properly. 

He watched in anticipation as Lance carefully wrapped his fingers around the base of his cock, gently stroking him, and Shiro breathed a soft moan at the contact. 

“I’ve been waiting all day for you…” Lance said softly as he leant in to press soft kisses along the shaft of Shiro’s cock. “Didn’t let myself cum earlier, either, just edged myself for ages.” 

Shiro breathed a moan at that, lacing his hand into Lance’s hair and petting it gently, Lance giving a soft sigh of contentment and leaning into his touch. 

“Only wanted to cum when you let me.” He said, looking up at him as he pressed the tip of his cock to his lips, not taking it into his mouth, just rubbing it over his lips, no doubt smearing his lipstick over it, and Shiro shuddered softly. 

“Lance…” Shiro said with a breathy groan, Lance grinning up at him and wrapping his pretty red lips around his cock, sucking a little around his tip and laving his tongue over the underside of it. 

Lance hummed softly, pressing forward and taking a little more into his mouth, sinking down onto his cock further with a soft moan. 

He gently cupped Shiro’s balls, massaging them between his fingers as he took his cock into his mouth, sucking as he went. 

Shiro groaned, petting his hair encouragingly and letting Lance work him up, red lips staining his cock as he took it deeper into his mouth, swallowing around him and looking up at him through his lashes. 

Lance hummed around him, smoothing his hands over Shiro’s thighs and pushing them further apart, before burying his nose against his abdomen, cock slipping into his throat, and Shiro whimpered, hips stuttering and fingers curling in his hair. 

He let Lance lave his attention over his cock for a little while, kissing messily over his shaft before taking him back into his mouth and sucking as he took him in, sinking down until he slipped into his throat and moaning around him. 

Shiro groaned, tugging a little on Lance’s hair, hips weakly stuttering as Lance swallowed around him, before pulling off to catch his breath and flicking his tongue through Shiro’s leaking slit. 

Shiro shuddered, keeping Lance’s head away from his cock with the grip in his hair, watching as Lance whined and tried to get his mouth back on him.

“M gonna cum.” He offered as explanation, Lance making no less of an effort to strain against him. 

“Wanna make you cum.” Lance whined, frowning and pouting.

“I want you on my cock.” Shiro murmured and Lance huffed, meeting his eyes.

“What, can’t get it up again, Captain? Getting old?” He asked, raising an eyebrow.

Shiro narrowed his eyes, jaw hardening. He shouldn’t rise to it, really he shouldn’t. 

He shoved his cock back into Lance’s mouth, pulling his face down over his cock until his nose was pressed against his pelvis and his cock was seated nicely in Lance’s throat. 

Shiro groaned as Lance swallowed around him, pulling him off a little and pulling him right back on, pushing his cock deeply into his throat and fucking his face for a few moments to send him over the edge, keeping Lance pulled as far on as he could as he came, cum shooting straight down his throat as Lance moaned around him.

He yanked Lance off when he was done, lips red and shiny, parted as he gasped for air, a little string of cum connecting his lips and Shiro’s cock, looking up at him with heavily lidded eyes. 

“That what you wanted?” He asked, letting go of Lance’s hair and Lance nodded, a soft whimper escaping him. 

“Uh huh.” He moaned.

“You really are a little slut, Lance.” Shiro observed, looking down to where Lance’s cock was straining against his panties, a wet patch where he’d leaked over them. 

Lance pouted up at him, and Shiro patted his lap, Lance quickly scrambling to climb into it. Shiro cupped the back of his head, gently pressing their lips together. 

“I wanna know when you got all of _this_ , and why I haven’t seen it before.” He asked against his lips, feeling Lance’s curl into a smile.

“Mm, well, I’m sure you’d love to know, but I can’t tell you _all_ my secrets, where would the fun in that be?”

Shiro hummed, gently biting into Lance’s bottom lip and listening to his soft whine, smoothing his hands over Lance’s lower back, under the floaty material, settling on his hips for a moment, before moving to his ass and giving a soft squeeze.

Lance bit his lip and gave a soft whine, eyes fluttering closed, and Shiro hummed, kissing at the corner of his lips. 

“Don’t do that.” He said softly, taking Lance’s lip between his teeth again as he released it from his own. “Mm, I wanna hear you moan for me.” He said, sliding his hands over Lance’s ass and squeezing a little, Lance gasping softly and biting his lip. “You’re my whore, aren’t you? So moan like one.” Shiro instructed, voice low. 

Lance whimpered as Shiro nudged his panties to the side, grabbing ahold of the base of the large plug that was seated inside of his ass and tugging on it, Lance gasping. Shiro hummed, sliding his other hand to rest on the small of Lance’s back he carefully pulled the toy out a little way, before pushing it deeply back into him, and Lance cried out softly. 

“Listen to you.” Shiro murmured as he lightly fucked Lance with the toy, drinking in each of his little whimpers and gasped out moans. 

Lance whined, reaching between them to wrap a hand around Shiro’s cock, which was already perking up again in interest, quickly pumping it in his hand, squeezing around it and teasing the head until Shiro was fully hardened again. 

He pulled the toy out completely and discarding it on the bed beside them, lining his cock up to Lance’s entrance and sliding easily in. “You’re a good little whore, aren’t you? Keeping yourself nice and open for me to just slip my cock right in, just use you whenever’s convenient for me, hm?”

Lance whimpered and nodded, lightly rocking his hips before Shiro stilled him, gripping his hips. 

“I’m going to tell you what’s going to happen here, are you listening?” He said and Lance stilled, looking at him and nodding, wetting his lip in anticipation. 

“I want you to ride me until you make a mess in those panties of yours and then I’m going to fuck you into the mattress, understand? Then, maybe if I’m feeling generous you can use that pretty mouth of yours on me again, hm?”

Lance swallowed thickly and nodded, a soft whimper escaping him, quickly resuming rocking his hips, lifting up and sinking back down, fucking himself quickly over Shiro’s cock and moaning. 

Shiro huffed a laugh, resting on his hips to steady him. “So impatient, baby. So good for me, opening yourself and not letting yourself cum, no matter how bad you wanted to.” He murmured, attaching his lips to Lance’s neck and sucking a mark into the curve of it. 

Lance whimpered, holding onto Shiro’s arms as he fucked himself, head thrown back as he moaned, rocking his hips and shuddering out a harsh gasp each time he rocked his cock into his prostate. 

“This what you wanted? Does it feel good, baby?” Shiro asked and Lance moaned, nodding.

“S-So good, so good, so good…” He whined, keeping up the quick pace, clearly desperate to cum after being so worked up for so long, and Shiro really wished that he had have been here earlier to see Lance working himself open and edging himself. 

Shiro guided him over his cock, before moving one hand around to palm at Lance’s cock through the fabric, Lance crying out and bucking into his touch, whimpering and Shiro felt the fabric dampen more as Lance’s cock leaked further. He whined harshly, back arching as he pushed Shiro’s cock into his prostate, desperately rocking his hips as he tried to hit there again. 

“Are you close, baby?” Shiro asked, squeezing around his cock and having to refrain from fucking up into him. 

“Y-yeah.” Lance moaned, nodding quickly.

“You gonna cum for me? Make a mess so I can fuck you nice and good?”

“Uh huh.” Lance whimpered, rutting against Shiro’s hand, cock dampening the fabric, as he desperately rocked his hips, knocking Shiro’s cock against his prostate with each desperate roll, head thrown back and lips parted as he moaned.

“Go on then, baby.” Shiro instructed, squeezing his cock a little, palming over it quickly as Lance got himself off, attaching his lips to Lance’s neck and biting down, sucking until the skin bruised and Lance was crying out, clutching tightly onto him. 

He came a few moments later, clenching tightly around Shiro’s cock, desperately moaning as he spilled in his underwear, cum staining the fabric. 

“Good boy.” Shiro praised, pressing gentle kisses in the curve of his neck, holding Lance’s hips as he rocked them, whimpering as he slowed. 

Shiro gave him a few moments, before flipping them, holding Lance against the mattress and pushing his cock back into him. Lance cried out, high pitched and needy, wrapping his arms around Shiro’s neck.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck-“ He whimpered, Shiro groaning and wasting no time setting a quick pace, fucking his cock deeply into him. 

“God, baby…” Shiro groaned against him, panting against his neck and hooking Lance’s thighs over his hips, pushing his legs further apart as he fucked into him. 

Lance whimpered, mewling as Shiro fucked him, keeping his legs spread wide apart as he pushed his cock into him, keeping the pace quick and rough, Lance keening as he hit into his prostate, clenching around him and Shiro made an effort to keep aiming there with each of his thrusts. 

He knew he wasn’t going to last long with Lance tightening around his cock like that on each thrust, overstimulated and practically milking his orgasm for him, moaning high whines and clinging desperately to Shiro. 

Shiro slid a hand around to wrap around Lance’s cock, hardened again against the messed fabric of his panties, and Shiro pulled it down, getting his cock out and quickly pumping him in time with his thrusts. 

“Shiro- Shiro- Shiro-” He whined breathlessly, keening and rutting his cock into Shiro’s hand, that all it took to send him over the edge again and clamping down on Shiro’s cock as he came, spilling over his hand and his own abdomen.

Shiro thrust deeply into him, moaning harshly against his throat as he came, grinding his cock into him as he rode his orgasm out before slowing to a stop, practically collapsing on top of Lance. 

Lance gave a soft whimper, panting heavily and beginning to gently trace soft patterns over Shiro’s back with his fingertips after a minute or two.

“Okay?” Shiro asked gently into the curve of his neck and Lance gave a shaky nod.

“Uh huh.” He agreed, voice hoarse. 

Shiro pulled his cock out of him, rolling off of him and onto the bed beside him, pressing a tired kiss to his shoulder and throwing an arm across his waist. 

Lance sighed, snuggling into him and letting his eyes fall closed. They lay like that in a contented exhausted silence for a good few minutes before Lance moved, squirming a little and giving an unhappy whine. 

“You wanna shower, baby?” He asked and Lance hummed a noise of affirmation.

“Yeah, uncomfy.” He said, and Shiro got up, scooping Lance up and into his arms, carrying him out into the bathroom and placing him down by the shower. 

Lance quickly took the panties off and held them up, wrinkling his nose. 

“You really should have let me take these off.” He said sadly and Shiro huffed a small laugh, taking them from him and tossing them into the laundry basket. 

“But I wanted you to keep them on.” He murmured, hands coming to rest on Lance’s hips as he pressed their lips together. 

Lance made a small humphing noise, but chased his lips when Shiro pulled away, looping his arms around his neck to keep him in place and kissing him softly for a few moments before finally letting him pull back. 

Shiro undressed, before lacing their hands together and leading him into the shower, switching the water on and starting on lathering soap onto Lance’s body while he cleaned himself out. Shiro pressed soft kisses to his jaw as he did, Lance giving a small whine as he slid his fingers into himself.

It was times like this that Shiro was glad that Lance preferred to clean himself up, because Shiro wasn’t sure how much cleaning it would be versus fingering and then they might have to go for another round in the shower. And then they’d have to do it all over again.

When it came to Lance, Shiro was an incredibly weak man. 

Shiro rinsed him off, lacing his fingers into Lance’s wet hair and massaging his scalp, knowing that Lance had only washed his hair the previous morning, so not using shampoo, but Lance practically purred, leaning into the touch, so Shiro kept it up for as long as Lance wanted. 

They got out of the shower a little while later, clean and tired, Shiro changing the sheet on the bed while Lance pulled a sweater on, climbing into bed and holding his arms out for Shiro. 

Shiro got in next to him, Lance happily curling against his chest, sweater cuffs pulled down past his wrists and he nuzzled against him, eyes closed. 

Shiro smiled softly, wrapping an arm around him and gently stroking his hair with the other.  
“Nap, sweetheart?” Shiro murmured and Lance gave a small nod. “Okay, I’ll wake you up when it’s dinner.”

“Thank you.” Lance mumbled back, giving a small yawn.

Shiro hummed softly, leaning down to drop a small kiss against his hair, snuggling down a little further into bed and closing his own eyes.

 

***

 

Shiro woke up gasping and panting harshly, eyes flying open as he sat up, wildly looking around in the dark, heart pounding in his chest.

“Shh, baby.” Lance murmured softly, wrapping his arms firmly around Shiro’s waist and pulling him back down and against his chest, keeping him tightly held. “It was just a nightmare, sweetheart, you’re okay, it’s okay, I promise.”

“W-what?” Shiro asked, heart still beating out of his chest as he melted against Lance, turning into him and pressing his face into his neck. 

“I’ve got you.” Lance soothed softly. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Shiro swallowed and shook his head, details already slipping away from him, but he wanted to push it as far from his mind as he could. 

He didn’t have to remember vividly; he had so many others that he did, so many others that told him exactly what had been plaguing him tonight. He didn’t need to think about it- couldn’t think about it. 

It had been… Well, he wasn’t exactly sure, but it had been the years with Voltron, and two years back on Earth, and… they were getting better, yes, thank god. They were more infrequent, much more, but they were still there. 

And when they did happen, they were still terrible. Like he was right back in the arena, right back there, like all this time hadn’t passed, like all this healing hadn’t happened, like just ripping back open a wound that was desperately trying to heal. 

“Shiro, I’ve _got you_.” Lance said softly but firmly, holding him tighter and pressing a kiss to his head, Shiro realising how erratic his breathing had become as he thought about it. “ _You’re safe._.”

Shiro nodded, giving a small sniff and trying to bury himself further against Lance, feeling incredibly small and vulnerable in his arms. But he felt safe, and he felt protected. He felt _loved_.

Lance gently stroked over his back, holding him close, and it was almost enough to shut his brain off, _almost_. 

Shiro screwed his eyes close and let out a shaky breath, trying desperately to clear his head. That part of his life was over, it was gone, he was safe, they were all safe-

“Hey.” Lance murmured, gently cupping Shiro’s cheek and tilting his head up to look at him. “You’re safe. I’ll always keep you safe, I’ll always protect you.”

Shiro sniffed, biting his lip and meeting his gaze through the dark, eyes pricked with tears.

“I promise.” Lance said softly, tenderly stroking his cheek. “I’ll never let anything hurt you.”

Shiro flicked his eyes to Lance’s lips and then back to his eyes, leaning forward quickly to press their lips together, sighing softly as Lance cupped the back of his head, gently moving their lips together. 

Shiro kissed him back, desperately trying to deepen the kiss, nipping and licking at Lance’s lips until he parted them, giving a gentle moan as Shiro slipped his tongue into his mouth and pulling Shiro more on top of him, hooking one of his legs over Shiro’s. 

Shiro could lose himself in this so easily, bury himself in Lance, just let himself melt against him, let Lance kiss his lips and suck on his tongue, giving gentle little sleepy moans against him as he kissed him. 

This was- this was good, this was what Shiro needed, get him out of his head and just lose himself in the feeling of kissing Lance. 

Lance cradled the back of his head, keeping up a gentle petting of his hair as they kissed, kissing him as fast or as slow as Shiro needed, letting him set the pace and then taking control of it, licking into his mouth and sucking on his tongue, just letting Shiro lose himself, let his mind go blank, letting himself be taken care of. 

It seemed like an age before Shiro was finally ready to pull back, panting and breathless, resting his head back on Lance’s chest and letting Lance hold him close. 

“Better?” Lance murmured and Shiro gave a small nod. “Anything else you need? That I can do?” He asked, gently stroking his back and Shiro shook his head. 

“Just like this.” He mumbled and Lance nodded, holding him tighter and kissing his head. 

“Try and get back to sleep, okay? I’ve got you, and I’ll keep you safe. Wake me up if you need me, okay? If you need _anything_.”

Shiro nodded against him, pressing a soft kiss to his chest and snuggling down. He trusted Lance, he knew he would. He knew nothing could hurt him here, not like this. 

He was safe, and that was all over, and he was right here in Lance’s arms, and Lance would make him feel better. And if he did have another nightmare? Then Lance would kiss him absolutely senseless until Shiro forgot that it had ever happened, and then he would hold him for as long as he needed. 

That was probably the moment that Shiro realised he was in love with Lance. 

Not just feelings, not just a crush… it was _so much more than that_. 

It was so strong and so deep and made Shiro feel hot inside and positively sick all at the same time. It was… good. It was good, really good. Lance was really good. He was in love with Lance.

He bit his lip with a small smile, letting Lance hold him, listening as his breathing evened out, telling him that he’d fallen back asleep. 

He could pretend, like this, that it was requited. That Lance loved him even half as much as Shiro did, and that things were like that- like Shiro wanted them to be. 

That they were dating and in love, and this was for the rest of forever, not just until they docked back on Earth. 

Lance was his and he was Lance’s and that was the way they wanted it to be. The way it would stay. 

Shiro fell asleep with a small smile on his face, just letting himself think about that, not dwelling on the fact that it wasn’t real, wasn’t true… he and Lance were just friends, after all. 

 

***

 

Shiro was wrapped just as tightly in Lance’s arms when he woke up, warm and snuggled against him, Lance already seemingly have awoken and gently lacing his fingers through Shiro’s hair with one hand, holding him with his other.

“Morning, baby.” Lance murmured as Shiro yawned, and he pressed a kiss to Shiro’s head. “Did you sleep okay?”

Shiro nodded, snuggling into him, not wanting to move just yet. “Yeah.” He confirmed sleepily. 

“We’re landing today, aren’t we?” He asked, still soothingly lacing through Shiro’s hair. 

“Mm, think so.” Shiro nodded, yawning again. That meant that everyone had to rest of the day to explore the new planet, which meant that Lance would be dragging him here there and everywhere. Shiro smiled softly at the thought. 

“Mm, that’s good. We all need a day off.” He said and Shiro looked up at him with a small smile, raising an eyebrow. Lance huffed a laugh, rolling his eyes. “ _You_ need a day off.” He said, leaning down to gently press their lips together. “You need some rest and a day to just fuck around doing whatever.”

Shiro shrugged. He wouldn’t have through that until Lance had come back into his life, would have just figured that it was better to carry on working and being productive, even if he was right on track to burn out. 

“Mm, don’t worry, I’ll make sure you’re not bored.” Lance said with a smile and Shiro smiled back. 

“I know you will.” He said softly, nuzzling the underside of his jaw. “Did you sleep okay? I’m sorry I woke you…”

“I slept fine.” Lance said softly, holding him a little tighter. “You don’t need to say sorry, okay? Think about it if it was me that woke you up.”

That was all very well, except Shiro was in love with Lance, and Lance wasn’t in love with Shiro. 

“Yeah, I guess.” Shiro said with a small sigh and Lance gently cupped his face, tipping it up to look at him. 

“Hey.” He said softly, raising an eyebrow. 

“I know.” Shiro sighed, looking away and Lance gently pressed their lips together.

“Promise?”

“Yeah.” 

“ _Promise_.”

“Promise.” Shiro agreed, looking back at him with a small pout.

“Okay.” Lance said with a small smile and kissed him again. 

Shiro didn’t think that he ever wanted to leave this bed again. If he could just stay right here wrapped up in Lance’s arms for the rest of eternity then that would suit him just fine. 

“How long until the alarm goes off?” Shiro asked against his lips and Lance hummed. 

“Mm, ten minutes or so?” He said thoughtfully, not pulling away to check. 

Shiro hummed back, gently biting down on Lance’s lower lip and eliciting a soft groan in response from him, burying his hand a little more firmly into Shiro’s hair and kissing him a little more forcefully. 

They didn’t have time for anything, Shiro knew that much, but kissing was fine, kissing was good. Having Lance hold him like this, move their lips together, nip and lick at his lips until he parted them and slipping his tongue into his mouth. This was good. Shiro would have stayed here like this kissing Lance all day if it were up to him. 

But unfortunately, they had work to do, and this ship wasn’t going to land itself. Especially not if the Captain of it was lazing in bed making out with his not-boyfriend all morning. 

The alarm went off sooner than Shiro would have liked, and he whined as Lance pulled away from him to turn it off, feeling much like a little child being told it was time for school and just wanting to have that little longer in bed. 

Except he wanted that little longer with Lance, instead. 

Lance frowned, biting his lip as he gently stroked the back of Shiro’s head. 

“Let’s shower together.” He said softly and Shiro furrowed his brows, desperately trying to find the will to say no. 

That had been his rule- no showering together. He didn’t trust Lance one jot, not to be naked and wet and soapy together in very close proximity, and he absolutely didn’t trust himself. 

But there was something about the tender way that Lance was looking at him, was holding him, that gave him pause. 

Something about the way he was clinging to Lance, clinging desperately like he was afraid to let go (and maybe he was), that made him give a small nod. 

Lance smiled softly, disentangling himself from Shiro, but lacing their fingers together, pulling him up and into the bathroom.

Lance didn’t want to have sex. He didn’t want to lure Shiro in and then get on his knees for him like he would in the normal way, look up at him with that cocky smirk as he took him to pieces, no. Lance just wanted to keep Shiro close, keep him safe. Make sure that he felt safe, like he’d said last night. 

And he did. 

Shiro wouldn’t admit to being clingy today, wouldn’t admit that he wanted to keep Lance plastered to his side at all times, that he always tried to push his nightmares as far from his mind as he could, but that he’d never felt better after one than when Lance had pulled him into his arms and held him close. 

But he was, and he did. He kept Lance close as they showered, gently soaping his body and washing his hair for him, giving him soft tender kisses to his lips and to the curve of his neck, running his hands down his body. Appreciatively, tenderly, not with any intent behind. 

And Lance did the same, gently washing him and kissing him and then rinsing him down, before stepping out of the shower and pulling him close again, wrapping him up in a towel and kissing his lips. 

They continued on like that for most of the morning, keeping their hands joined through breakfast and the morning briefing, until Shiro was forced to let him go for the landing. 

He wouldn’t admit to how anxious that made him, because his nightmares were just that- nightmares. Just ghosts of his past that tried to hurt him, but couldn’t, not anymore. Because he’d healed and he’d moved on, but they were still there, and they still scared him, still made him feel like he was five years old and needing to go and curl up next to his mother until he fell back asleep. 

Lance made him feel that safe. Lance made him feel that loved. 

He stumbled through the landing, distracted and anxious, Lance not having left the control room, as he usually would, and the crew seemingly having the sense not to ask, as they usually would, just letting him linger at the back of the room until they had successfully landed.

Shiro jolted as he felt arms wrap around his waist, but quickly melted against him, eyes falling closed momentarily as he gave a soft sigh, before twisting in Lance’s arms and burying his face against his neck. 

“I’ve got you.” Lance murmured quietly, only for him to hear, and it was grounding, it was so, so grounding. 

Shiro gave a small nod against him, letting Lance gently stroke over his back for as long as he needed, and when Shiro finally pulled back, they were alone. 

“Okay?” Lance asked softly.

It didn’t hold the weight of an “are you okay?”, because they both knew that Shiro wasn’t, and he felt pathetic for it. They both knew how not okay he was, and how much he hated that he wasn’t, that everything that had happened to him still had such a hold over him after all this time, that all the healing he’d done could still be so jolted by something so simple as a nightmare. 

It was just an “okay?”, just a small and gentle check in. Just an are we okay to move on from this moment, or do you still need to stay like this for a little longer?

Shiro was grateful, he was so, so grateful. And Shiro was in love. He was so, _so_ in love. 

He nodded, pressing his lips to Lance’s forehead and Lance gave him a soft smile back, re-lacing their fingers together and bringing his knuckles to his lips in a soft kiss. 

“I expect you’re hungry, hm? Let’s go and find something to eat.” 

Shiro nodded, letting Lance take the lead, leading them off of the ship and out into the planet’s air. 

It was always nice to breathe in some fresh air again after being cooped up on the ship for so long, and it was always disappointing when it wasn’t a type of air that they could breathe and they had to wear their suits out. 

But this planet, thankfully, was the former, and they both took in large deep breaths, looking around, before Lance lead him off in the direction of what looked to be the nearest town. 

They walked around for a while, wandering the streets and peering in the windows of shops, but Lance insisted that they find some food before doing anything, because they were both hungry, and Shiro especially after all of that work to land the Atlas. 

They eventually found a little place, being shown to a table and handed menus that neither of them could read. 

They spent a little while speculating, before just telling their waiter to give them whatever he would recommend and they waited for their food to arrive. 

The wait wasn’t long, and Shiro wasn’t entirely sure what was being put in front of them, but it smelled good enough, so they both dug in, electing not to think on it too much. 

They did the same for desert, and paid up, before making their way back down the streets, wandering through the different shops there and picking up various things to show each other. 

Currently, Lance was flicking through clothing rails, though Shiro wasn’t sure that he could survive another trying on session after the previous incident, though he couldn’t go and look at anything else unless he wanted to let go of Lance’s hand. So he didn’t. 

Lance hummed and picked things up, holding them up and frowning at them, before putting them back. 

After a little while of looking, and honestly, at this point, Shiro wasn’t paying attention, but then Lance was thrusting a small pile of things at him and ushering him towards the changing rooms. 

What? This hadn’t been part of the deal. 

“Please, baby?” Lance asked with a pout and that was that, Shiro was gone and in the changing room, curtain pulled across and stripping, ready to try on whatever it was that Lance had picked up for him. 

He really needed to get a grip on himself. 

Shiro shouldn’t have been such a weak man, but he was. He so, _so_ was, and so he was changing into various shirts and sweatshirts, showing Lance each one and letting him scrutinise before changing into the next. 

Shiro couldn’t tell which ones Lance had liked and which he hadn’t until he left, and Lance grabbed them from him, putting a few back onto the rack and taking the rest over to the counter, Shiro stumbling after him to keep up. 

“I didn’t consent to this.” Shiro pouted, getting his wallet out and Lance smiled, pecking his cheek. 

“But darling, they looked lovely on you.” He said in a soft tease, and Shiro’s heart jumped in his chest. 

He paid for them quickly. 

Lance took the bag, slipping their hands together and leading him out of the shop and into the next one. 

Shiro was really, really, _gone_. 

They ended up with a few more bags by the time they were finished, various bits and pieces that Lance had picked out for the both of them, and Shiro was more than ready to retire for the evening and maybe have a bath with Lance and read another chapter of their book in bed. 

Except Lance gasped loudly as they were heading back, pulling Shiro in the opposite direction over to what looked like some sort of ice cream stand. 

“Shiro- Shiro, look, look, look-“ He said excitedly, getting in line and looking up at the board with pictures of the flavours.

“And now we’re getting ice cream.” Shiro observed, a stupid smile on his face as he looked at Lance.

“Can we, can we? Pleeeease?” Lance asked, pouting.

“Mm, for a kiss, maybe.” Shiro said with a hum and Lance gave a small giggle, gently pressing their lips together.

“You’re so easy.” He murmured, kissing him again and then moving up in the line. 

Shiro really was that easy. 

“Not that kind of kiss.” Shiro murmured against Lance’s ear, wrapping an arm around his waist, Lance giving a small gasp and turning his head so that their lips were nearly touching.

“Oh yeah? What kind of kiss?” He asked breathily. 

“The kind that leaves you rutting against my leg.” Shiro breathed back, swallowing Lance’s little whimper as he pressed their lips together again. “But you can pay me back later.”

“Thanks.” Lance said, biting his lip and pulling away from him, going up to the counter and pointing to one of the flavours, turning to Shiro and waiting for him to do the same. 

Shiro slid his arm around Lance’s waist, pulling him close as they waited for their ice creams, Lance pulling away from him to collect them, looking back at him with a reprimanding look. 

“What?” He asked with a grin, taking his cone from Lance and pecking his lips playfully. 

“D’you need a drink, perhaps?” He asked, raising an eyebrow and Shiro raised his back in confusion. “You’re incredibly thirsty.” 

Shiro rolled his eyes and pulled Lance close again.”I can think of something I’d rather drink.” He offered and Lance wrinkled his nose. 

“Gross.”

Shiro snorted. “Says you.”

“Says me?”

“Cumslut.” Shiro said, raising and eyebrow and Lance laughed, throwing him a wink back. 

“Mm, you’d know _alllll_ about that, wouldn’t you?” He said, lips curled and Shiro rolled his eyes.

“Oh, sure.”

“Just eat your ice cream.” Lance said with a snort, shaking his head. 

Shiro shrugged, grinning at him and playfully bumping their shoulders together as they walked back to the Atlas. 

 

***

 

As it turned out, Lance had taken Shiro’s suggestions for filming another video incredibly seriously. He’d sat on it a little, clearly, but asked him a few days later. 

And if there was anything Shiro couldn’t resist, it was Lance. So what had seemed like nothing more than dirty talk at the time, was quickly becoming reality. 

Lance had stolen a uniform from the laundry room, putting it on well after everyone had gone to bed and got his camera and some lube, leading Shiro by the hand down the dimly lit halls to his office and pulling the lock across the door, pushing Shiro up against it with an excited giggle and kissing him. 

“Mm, wait for the camera, baby.” Shiro murmured against his lips with a smile. 

“Nu uh, gotta be in role on camera.” He murmured back, before pulling away and going to prop the camera up. “Over your desk, right? So here is good?” He asked, and Shiro nodded. 

Was this a horrible idea? Absolutely. Would Shiro’s job be put in jeopardy if someone found them doing this? Quite possibly, yes. Was someone likely to find them? Less likely, but still entirely possible. Were any of those reasons good enough to make Shiro say no to Lance and call this whole thing off? Not a chance in hell. 

“So what am in in for then, Captain?” Lance asked teasingly, fluttering his lashes as Shiro switched a few dim lights on. 

“Mm, slacking off, probably.” Shiro said with a thoughtful hum, moving across to him. “Or trying to seduce your Captain, perhaps.” He said, raising an eyebrow as Lance leant in to peck his lips. 

“Who, me? I’d never do such a thing.” He said innocently, before dragging Shiro’s bottom lip between his teeth and eliciting a soft groan from him. 

“Switch the camera on, _Cadet_.” He murmured and Lance whined, kissing him again before moving to switch it on. “Okay?” 

“Mm.” Shiro said, sitting down at his desk picking up some papers and, glancing up at him. “You gonna start, or?” 

Lance playfully rolled his eyes and nodded, walking over to the desk and biting his lip. “You wanted to see me, Captain?” 

Shiro hummed, looking up at him from where he’d redirected his gaze back down to the papers. “Yes.” He said, clearing his throat and putting them down. “I’ve been watching you for a little while now, and I’m not too happy with the standard of work you’ve been producing.”

Lance furrowed his brows in concern. “Oh.” He said, biting his lip and Shiro took the chance to continue. 

“I’ve noticed that you’ve been slacking off quite a bit, and you’ve been fooling around instead of trying to get on with the work.”

“I-”

Shiro held up his hand. “I’ve _also_ noticed some of the advances you’ve made on various coworkers of yours, care to elaborate on that a little, for me?”

Lance flushed. “What? I haven’t- no. I haven’t made- _advances_ on anyone!”

“No?” Shiro asked with an amused smile, eyes trailing over Lance’s flushed cheeks and plumped lips as he looked at him through long lashes.

“No.” 

Shiro made a non committal noise. “I see.” He said, leaning back in his chair and raising an eyebrow. “Let me ask you something, Cadet. What are you willing to do to make it up to me? This is a special hand picked team, and I don’t take to slackers lightly, you know.”

“Anything.” Lance said softly. “I’ll do anything to make it up to you, I didn’t mean… to not be… performing properly, sir.”

“Anything, huh?” Shiro asked, raising an eyebrow and looking him up and down.

He hummed, before crooking his finger. Lance blinked, tilting his head and Shiro rolled his eyes, crooking it again. 

Lance walked around the side of his desk, standing in front of him and Shiro gingerly rested his hands on Lance’s hips. 

“So tell me then, making moves on your coworkers instead of working, hm? What d’you think an appropriate punishment for that is, Cadet? What about those times when you just bat those lashes of yours to get out of trouble?”

Lance flushed, breath hitching and looking down at him. “I- sir-“

“Hm?” Shiro asked, slowly stroking his fingers over Lance’s clothed hips, before pulling him down into his lap. 

Lance gasped, biting down on his lip.

“Anything?” Shiro asked again, and Lance flicked his eyes to Shiro’s lips and then back up to his eyes, nodding. 

“Anything, sir.” 

Shiro gripped his hips a little tighter, pulling Lance closer in his lap, before sliding a hand up to cup the back of his neck. He tangled his fingers in his hair, carefully pulling him closer and pressing their lips together. 

Lance melted against him, wrapping his arms around his neck and kissing him back. 

Shiro kissed him for a few moments, before using his grip in his hair to pull him back, Lance frowning at the loss. 

Shiro looked him up and down, lip curling, and carefully beginning to unbutton Lance’s uniform, desperately wanting to be rough with it, but he couldn’t risk damaging it, seeing as it wasn’t Lance’s. 

Lance shuddered under his touch, letting the jacket fall to the floor and Shiro roll his shirt up and pull it over his head. 

Shiro hummed, smoothing his hands over Lance’s chest, fingertips catching on his nipples, already hardened from the chill and the excitement and Lance shivered, biting his lip. 

Shiro knew he didn’t need to worry about keeping things ‘exciting’ for the video, as Lance would take care of the editing, and cut out anything he didn’t think was up to scratch. So he took his time, gently rolling the buds between his fingers and tugging on them. 

Lance gasped, head tipping back in pleasure, and Shiro took the opportunity to latch onto his exposed neck, nipping and sucking at the skin as he played with his nipples. Lance whined, and Shiro kissed down his chest, wrapping his lips around one of the buds and sucking. 

Lance buried a hand into Shiro’s hair immediately, rolling his hips down over Shiro’s lap and giving a soft moan. 

Shiro smiled against his skin, gently grazing his teeth over his nipple, before moving onto the other and laving it with the same attention as the first.

By the time Shiro pulled away, Lance was a whining, whimpering mess, hard in his pants and trying to rut down in Shiro’s lap for some friction. 

Shiro pushed him out of his lap and Lance whined, looking at him in confusion.

“You’re very sensitive.” He observed, standing up himself and pulling Lance flush against his body. 

Lance whimpered, looking up at him curiously, clearly trying to calculate what Shiro’s next move would be. 

Shiro flipped him around, pressing his crotch to his ass, Lance shuddering as Shiro’s defined bulge rubbed against him.

“However.” He said, lips pressed close to his ear, bending him over the desk. “This is supposed to be a _punishment_.” 

Lance gave a soft moan, pushing his ass back against Shiro’s crotch. “What, gonna spank me, Captain?” He asked breathily. 

Shiro hummed, running his hands down Lance's back and cupping his ass, giving it a squeeze. 

Lance whined, pushing back against his hands and Shiro squeezed again. 

"Would you like that?" Shiro asked, voice low. 

"If I say no, then will you?" He asked innocently and Shiro chuckled. 

"Don't be clever." He chided, sliding his hands around to unbutton Lance's pants and pull them down.

“No?” Lance asked breathily, biting his lip and wiggling his hips a little. 

Shiro answered him with a harsh smack across one of his ass cheeks. 

Lance whimpered, leaning further over the desk and pushing his ass out a little. 

Shiro hummed, snapping the waistband of his underwear against his skin and then pulling it down, exposing his ass and running his hands over it. 

He groped at his ass for a few moments, squeezing and kneading the flesh in his hands before slapping against his skin again with the flat of his hand, Lance gasping harshly. 

"You think you're going to put more of an effort in from now on?" Shiro asked, voice low, finishing the question with another hit. 

"Y-yes, sir." Lance moaned, nodding. 

"Oh really?" Shiro asked amusedly, tracing his fingers over the slightly pinkened skin and slapping him again. "I'd hazard a guess that you're enjoying this a little too much... that you might start acting up to get me to punish you again... what d'you think?"

Lance gasped out another moan as Shiro slapped him again. "Yes, sir!" He moaned. "Want you to punish me..." He whimpered. 

Shiro tutted in disapproval. "Yes, just as I thought. Maybe that's what got you started in the first place, hm? Hoped that I'd bring you in here and you could flirt your way out of trouble, maybe wind me up so much that I'd just bend you over this desk and fuck you."

Lance groaned, pushing his ass backwards. "Fuck... please, I want it..." He whined. 

Shiro gave another tut. "You're a slut, Cadet. You know that? Nothing but a filthy _slut_. Maybe I'd be better off employing you in a slightly different way, hm? Keep you in here as my little pet? Sit you under my desk to keep my cock warm with that mouth of yours while I work? I'm sure you'd respond much better in that line of work..." He said, slapping him after each sentence, Lance jolting a little with each slap. 

"Oh god..." He whimpered. "Yes, fuck, yes, I wanna be your whore, Captain, wanna be here for you to use and fuck whenever you want... fuck..."

"God, you're so needy, look at you." Shiro said, raising an eyebrow at how Lance was rocking his hips, trying to push into the touch, wiggling his ass enticingly for Shiro to slap him. 

Shiro grabbed handfuls of his ass and Lance moaned, rocking into his touch as Shiro squeezed, pulling quickly back and giving a sharp slap over each cheek. 

"I don't think this is serving its purpose." Shiro mused. "You're too much of a slut." 

Lance pouted and whined, shaking his ass. 

"What, you don't want me to stop? Use your words, Cadet."

"Fuck me..." Lance murmured, a whine to his voice. 

"Fuck you?" Shiro asked, raising an eyebrow. "Who said anything about fucking you?"

"Captain... _please_." 

Shiro hummed and slapped him again, _hard_. "You're that desperate? You want my cock that badly?" 

Lance whimpered and nodded. "Please, please, I need it so bad..."

"God." Shiro scoffed, but reached for the lube anyway, uncapping it and coating his fingers, rubbing them teasingly at Lance's entrance. 

Lance moaned appreciatively, pushing back against him, trying to slip his fingers inside of him, but Shiro moved back as Lance did, not letting him. 

"You know, I think I _will_ keep you here for myself. Such an eager needy little whore. So pretty and desperate to be stuffed full of cock. I'm gonna fuck you _so good_ , Cadet, you won't want to leave even if I decide to let you.”

Lance whimpered at that, groaning softly. "Please..." He whined. 

Shiro hummed, slipping a finger into him, though they both knew he could take more, and Lance moaned appreciatively. 

"Fuck..." Lance breathed, biting his lip. 

"That's not enough for you though, baby, is it?" Shiro asked teasingly, slowly pushing his finger in and out of him at a slow teasing pace.

“N-no, not enough.” Lance whined, shaking his head and rocking his hips, Shiro quickly putting a hand on one to still him. 

“Now, now, be good.” He said disapprovingly and Lance whined again.

“Please…” 

“Please what?” He asked, crooking his finger inside of him and feeling for his prostate, Lance gasping softly as he pressed against it.

“More- more, please-” Lance moaned, clearly making an effort not to rock back against Shiro’s fingers. 

“This is supposed to be a punishment, is it not?” Shiro asked, eyebrow raised. “Why would I give you what you want?” 

Lance whimpered, huffing. “Shiro…” He murmured in a soft growl and Shiro chuckled. 

“Breaking already, Lance?” He asked. “I’ve seen that video, I know you can take it, you’re just being needy.”

Lance gave another frustrated huff and rocked his hips. “Just give it to me…” He whined.

“That’s not a very nice way to ask now, is it?” Shiro asked, pressing against his prostate again, lip curling as Lance jerked under him. 

“Please, Captain.” Lance moaned, and Shiro chuckled again, pulling his finger out until just the tip remained inside of him, shallowly thrusting it into him.

“I don’t know…” He hummed.

“ _Shiro…_.” Lance whined frustratedly. 

“Oh, baby.” Shiro said, pulling his finger out completely and smoothing his hands over his ass, giving a soft squeeze. “Tell me what you want.”

“Want your cock, want it hard, please, baby…” Lance whined and Shiro hummed, pushing his finger back into it and then pushing another one in next to it. 

Lance moaned appreciatively, rocking his hips a little.

“Now, now, none of that, Cadet.” Shiro said warningly, slapping his ass cheek with his free hand and quickly fucking his fingers into him. 

Lance gasped harshly, groaning and keeping his hips still as Shiro fucked him, quickly pushing a third into him and spreading them inside of him, Lance easily stretching out under his ministrations. 

Shiro pulled his fingers from his ass when he was ready, delivering another slap to his ass, Lance whimpering in response, before slicking his cock and lining it up, pushing in in one swift thrust.

Lance moaned, back arching and pushing back against him, shuddering as Shiro smoothed his hands over his back, resting them on his hips and grinding into him. 

“Captain- Captain, fuck-” Lance gasped, arching against him as he began to draw his cock out, trying to keep in as much as he could. 

Shiro pulled it out, tip catching on his rim as it slipped out of him, before pushing back into him swiftly, balls slapping against his ass and they both groaned together.

Shiro debated for a moment keeping the pace slow and teasing, but gave in as Lance clenched around him, drawing his cock out and slamming back in, setting a quick rough pace. 

He reached to bury a hand in Lance’s hair, tugging on it and pulling Lance’s head back, other hand gripping his hip as he fucked his cock into him. 

Lance moaned, gripping onto the desk hard, lips hanging open in pleasure, steadily rolling his hips back against each of Shiro's thrusts, trying to pull him in deeper. 

Shiro groaned, not making as much of an effort to be quiet as he should have been, shifting his hips to fuck into Lance's prostate and revelling in his sharp high moan, instead of trying to make him be quiet. They could so easily be found, here, so easily someone could hear them...

It should have panicked Shiro, should have turned him off, but it just _didn't_. It didn't and he didn't want to dwell on that for too long, just kept fucking quickly into Lance, cock hitting deep inside him as he slapped their hips together. 

Really, he should have found something to gag Lance with. That's what he'd suggested when he'd first brought this up, that was the _logical_ thing to do... but he didn't, just kept fucking his cock into Lance's prostate, desperately chasing each moan and gasp as he snapped his hips, releasing his grip in Lance's hair to hold at the base of his neck, pushing him down against the hard wood of his desk, pulling Lance's body back against him with his other hand. 

Lance was whimpering and writhing under him, thighs shaking as he desperately clutched at the desk, mouth hanging open and a small pool of drool gathering on it by his mouth as Shiro roughly fucked him, making sure to keep aiming for his prostate as much as he could. 

His cock was leaking a steady stream of precum where it hung between his legs, jumping with each thrust and drooling a little more onto the side of his desk and the floor. 

Shiro reached around to grip his cock, quickly pumping it as he pushed him against his desk, wood creaking with each thrust as Lance whimpered into it. 

Shiro groaned as Lance’s hole fluttered around him, cock drooling heavily over his hand as he worked him, and Shiro knew he wasn’t going to last long.

“You gonna cum, baby?” Shiro murmured, leaning over his back and pressing his lips to the shell of his ear.

“Yes- yes- yes, gonna cum, gonna-” Lance gasped raggedly, clenching hard around Shiro’s cock as he came, spilling over his hand and shooting cum down the side of his desk.

Shiro worked him through it, quickly fucking into his fluttering hole as he chased his own orgasm, roughly thrusting into him as Lance whimpered and moaned, thrusting in deeply as he came and groaning, biting down on Lance’s shoulder as he filled him. 

Lance panted harshly and Shiro pulled back, carefully slipping his cock out of him and watching as cum dribbled out of his hole. He roughly grabbed Lance by the hips, pulling him around to face the camera, pushing his thumbs into his hole and holding it open, Lance pushing a little more cum out, and Shiro groaned softly as it dripped down his thighs. 

Shiro moaned, scooping it back up and pushing it into his hole. Lance whimpered, pressing his face into the desk as Shiro pushed two fingers into him, spreading them inside of him and then dropping to his knees.

Lance jolted as Shiro nosed at his hole, which told him that Lance hadn’t noticed. Shiro pulled his fingers out and slipped his tongue in, slowly fucking him with it. Lance whined, hips stuttering a little as Shiro nibbled at his rim, sucking and fucking his tongue into him.

“Shiro- Shiro-” Lance gasped and Shiro slapped his thigh harshly. They wouldn’t be able to use the footage if Lance was moaning his real name. 

Thankfully, Lance quickly checked himself, though, because Shiro wanted to be able to watch this over and over. 

“Sir, Sir, Sir-” He sobbed as Shiro ate his cum out of his ass, spreading him open on his tongue. 

Shiro could have kept going like this for the rest of his life, just making Lance sob on his tongue. He sucked at his rim, biting and nipping before fucking his tongue back into him and pushing his fingers into him, spreading them inside him and fucking his tongue between them, curling his fingers inside of him and pressing into his prostate.

Lance keened softly at that, Shiro rubbing them firmly over it, Lance sensitive and over stimulated, thighs shaking with the pleasure, cock weakly twitching between his legs with interest. 

Shiro sucked at his rim as he fucked his fingers into him, quick and hard into his prostate, Lance jerking and keening with each hard thrust, cock already dribbling again, despite not being fully hard yet. 

Shiro slipped the tip of his fourth finger in, stretching him wider as he fucked them into him quick and hard, and Lance gasped harshly, a loud cry spilling from his lips. 

Shiro gave a soft growl, wanting nothing more than to make Lance scream for him, instead, unbuttoning his jacket and slipping his tie off from underneath, scrunching it up and shoving it into Lance’s mouth to muffle him, before delving his tongue back between his fingers where they were buried in his ass. 

Lance only cried out louder at that, knowing he would be muffled and clearly taking that as an okay to just let go. Shiro worked him quickly, pumping his fingers into him and biting at the flesh of his ass, quickly pumping and squeezing his cock and it was only a mere few minutes before Lance came again with a loud cry, clenching hard around Shiro’s fingers and spilling messily over his hand and the floor. 

Lance slumped against the desk as he came down, but Shiro wasn’t done with him just yet. 

He flipped Lance over onto his back, lifting him onto the desk so that he was lying on it and spread his legs.

Lance looked at him in a mixture of confusion and surprise, an underlying excitement and arousal in his questioning gaze. 

“This is supposed to be a punishment, is it not, Cadet?” He asked, tilting his head and Lance swallowed, giving a small shaky nod. “Then I think you can cum again for me.”

He knew Lance _could_ , he’d watched that specific video far too many times, watched each frame, each expression and jump of muscle under his skin, heard each gasp and cry. He knew Lance could take it. 

Lance gave a soft whimper as Shiro wrapped his hand around his spent cock, gently teasing it, working it back up again, leaning over him and pinching at a nipple with his free hand, before latching his mouth onto the other and nipping. 

Lance gasped, whining softly as Shiro suckled, gently using his teeth as he did so, before moving off of it and biting down into the skin surrounding it, rolling the skin between his teeth until a mark formed. 

Lance was arching off of the desk and into his touch, cock reluctantly beginning to respond to the stimulation, despite being a sensitive and overstimulated mess, it was doing its best. 

As it hardened, Shiro began to pick up the pace, working it quickly in his hand, thumbing through his slit and squeezing around his cock as Lance writhed and squirmed on the desk beneath him. 

He kissed up Lance’s chest to his throat, biting and sucking and littering his skin with marks as he went, and it wasn’t long before Lance was sobbing around the tie, bucking up into Shiro’s every touch as tears tracked down his cheeks from the overstimulation. 

“Come on, Lance.” Shiro murmured as his lips came to rest close to his ear. “Cum for me, baby.” 

And Lance did. He cried out loudly, arching hard off of the desk and against Shiro as he came, only a minimal amount of cum dribbling from his cock and onto his abdomen as he did so, panting hard and bringing a hand up from the desk to wrap around Shiro’s back, clinging to him as he rode out his orgasm. 

“Good boy, there’s my good boy, baby.” Shiro praised softly, working him through it and then slowing his hand to a stop and letting go of his sensitive cock. 

He carefully removed the tie from Lance’s mouth, holding Lance against him and carefully picking him up and into his arms, kissing the side of his head as Lance buried it into his neck. 

“Too much?” He asked gently and Lance shook his head. 

“Perfect.” He rasped, clinging to him tighter. 

They stayed like that for a good few minutes, before Shiro stood up, carefully setting Lance down in his chair, which was far more comfortable than the desk, and moved to switch the camera off. 

He tidied up the room, slipping the lube and the camera into his top drawer and locking it, before carefully putting Lance’s clothes back on and then fixing his own, before scooping him back up into his arms and carrying him down towards their room. 

Thankfully, they didn’t pass anyone on the way and he was able to get them inside without any hassle. The last thing he needed was for someone to see Lance in that state, or no doubt himself, and lest of all Veronica. He’d already had enough from her about this whole thing. 

Shiro refused to think about _that_ , though, or read into anything, because he had already set himself up for heartbreak enough as it was. He didn’t need to try and fool himself into thinking that it was requited because that would just… make it so much worse when the fallout came. 

Shiro didn’t want to think about that. 

He set Lance down in the bathroom and undressed them both, leading him into the shower and Lance gave a soft contented sigh at the warmth of the water, letting Shiro lather soap onto his skin, and not moving when he was finished. 

Shiro hesitated, but moved to gently soap his ass, and Lance still made no move to protest. He hesitated again, but carefully cleaned him out inside when Lance made no further attempts to move, just stand there contentedly as he let Shiro clean him. 

Well, that was a first. That was… somehow very intimate. 

It shouldn’t have been intimate, it wasn’t something that… should have been intimate. Because if Shiro was going to be allowed to cum in his ass, then he should at least be decent enough to help clean him up, because he knew it could be a pain. He’d done it in the past for people he knew less well, and there was no doubt he’d do it again in the future. It wasn’t a big deal. 

But with Lance it _was_ a big deal, because Lance kept himself closed off. Lance managed to keep the perfect balance of giving the illusion of opening up, and being vulnerable, without actually being at all. Lance hadn’t even wanted to shower together at first. And Lance had never made a big deal of cleaning up but he’d never let Shiro do it. 

And maybe Shiro was just making too big a deal out of it, maybe Lance was just tired. Maybe he shouldn’t have been fooling himself into thinking that maybe things were moving somewhere. Because Lance still wasn’t… emotionally there with him in the same way that Shiro was with Lance. 

He was caring and he was kind and he laughed with Shiro and they always had a good time together. And he was quiet when he was tired and Shiro knew what mood called for what cuddling position. 

But there was… nothing more. There was no vulnerability the way that Shiro allowed with his nightmares and his bad days, and… everything else. Lance knew how Shiro felt when he was feeling down, and Shiro knew that Lance also had bad days, but he was never allowed to be privy to those. 

Lance would just put on a smile and pretend that things were as normal and Shiro didn’t know how to go about trying to change that, or to get Lance to trust him enough to be vulnerable. 

He shook it off as they finished up in the shower, there was no use dwelling on it, anyway. He dried them both off and carried Lance to bed, Lance quickly nestling himself against Shiro with a soft contented sigh. 

“You need anything else?” Shiro asked gently, as he wrapped his arms around him. 

“Just you.” Lance mumbled softly back in response, pressing a kiss to the curve of his neck. 

Shiro allowed the small smile to creep onto his face at that, and he pressed a kiss to the top of Lance’s head and shuffled down in the bed a little, pulling the covers properly up around them. 

 

***

 

Shiro hadn’t retired to bed yet tonight, and he knew that Lance must have been worrying. He’d joined them for dinner, but he’d headed back to his office after that. 

There wasn’t as much work for Shiro to do as of right now, as they were in between planets and the wifi was down, just general things to keep up with and preparations to make… but nothing that was worth staying overtime to complete. 

Here he was anyway, sitting in his dimly lit office, hunched over something that he wasn’t absolutely aware of… he wasn’t really paying much attention, to be honest. Wasn’t really doing overtime, was just… here.

He didn’t want Lance to worry about him, and in all honesty, he _should_ have told him he was going back to work, but he hadn’t. 

He’d known it was going to be this kind of day from sort of about mid morning. He’d been on edge since then, and he knew that Lance had realised at dinner, and he was probably giving him a little bit of space, for which Shiro was grateful. 

He knew he wasn’t going to be able to sleep tonight for a long time with how wound up he felt. Jittery and on edge and he wasn’t sure that he could go to sleep if he tried. 

He managed to filter through a _little_ bit of work over the next few hours, but his heart wasn’t really in it (nor his head, for that matter), and he was jolted out of his thoughts by his office door slowly being pushed open.

“Hey there, Captain.” Lance said with a soft smile, carrying too mugs on a little tray and pushing the door closed behind him, bringing them over to his desk and sitting in the seat in front of it. “Rough night?” 

Shiro breathed out a soft sigh and nodded, rubbing at his temple and picking up one of the mugs, taking a sip of the steaming tea and blowing out a breath. 

“Thank you.” He murmured and Lance gave him a soft smile. 

“Of course.” He said, picking up his own and taking a sip. “You wanna talk about it?” 

Shiro looked at him for a long moment and shook his head. “I just feel…” He trailed off and shrugged. 

Lance nodded, reaching out to gently rest his hand over where Shiro’s lay on the desk, gently stroking his thumb over his skin. 

“It’s not doing you any good being hauled up in here.” He offered and Shiro hummed, shrugging again.

“I guess.”

Lance gave him a look. “Come to bed.” He said softly. 

“Lance…” Shiro said with a sigh, running his hand over his face. 

“Okay…” Lance said with a small smile. “Come to bed and I’ll run you a bath and take care of you, and then we can read in bed until you feel sleepy, or fuck until you feel sleepy, or do whatever you want until you feel sleepy, okay?”

Shiro hadn’t been able to resist that little smile of Lance’s up until this point and he really wasn’t about to start now. 

“Okay.” He said with a resigned nod, running his hand through his hair. 

“Okay…?” Lance asked, smile widening a little and standing up, offering Shiro his hand.

Shiro huffed, looking at him for a long moment, before taking his hand and standing up, picking up his mug and letting his eyes close momentarily as Lance stood up on his tiptoes to kiss his cheek.

Lance flipped the light off on their way out, stroking over Shiro’s hand as they walked, gently swinging their hands between them. 

He pushed the sensor on Shiro’s door, setting their tea down beside the bed as it slid closed behind them. 

“Okay?” He asked softly, gently cupping Shiro’s face and stroking his thumb over his cheek bone. 

Shiro nodded, leaning into his touch and letting his eyes fall momentarily closed. 

Lance sat him down on the bed and got his tablet up, pulling a book up and handing it to him before kissing his head and walking into the bathroom. 

Shiro looked after him, before relaxing a little as he heard the water running into the bath, letting his eyes run over the words on the screen, not particularly processing them, but it was enough. 

He'd gotten through a few pages by the time Lance came back, holding a hand out for him and pulling him up, carefully and slowly undressing him in a way that really, _should_ have turned him on, but it only relaxed him. 

Lance took his own clothes off and lead him into the bathroom, helping him into the bath and then getting in after him, sitting between his legs and leaning against his chest.

"Okay?" He asked softly as Shiro wrapped his arms around Lance's chest. 

Shiro sighed softly and nodded, pressing a kiss to the curve of Lance's neck. 

"It's perfect, thank you, Lance." He murmured. 

"Of course." Lance said softly with a smile, placing his hands over where Shiro's rested against his abdomen. 

"No, really. I probably... would have been in there all night otherwise." He said with another small sigh. 

Lance turned to press a gentle kiss to his temple. "I know." He said back softly and they were quiet for a few moments. "Are you sure you don't want to talk about it?"

Shiro didn't say anything for a long few moments. "There's not... anything to talk about, really. I'm not- even thinking anything, it's just a feeling."

"A not good one?"

"A not good one." Shiro agreed, nuzzling the side of Lance's neck and Lance hummed softly. 

"I can understand that." He murmured. "I know how you feel. Well, not... exactly, but... I know what that's like, at least."

"I know you do." Shiro sighed. "How d'you handle it...?" He asked after a few moments. 

"I..." Lance started. "I just sort of... do other stuff to take my mind off of it until it goes away. I read, sometimes, or go out. Surround myself with people. Sometimes I find someone to just fuck me out of my mind. And sometimes I just... need to feel it."

Shiro nodded. "Yeah."

"This one of those times?" 

"I think so."

"Okay." Lance said, with a small nod. "Okay, that's okay. We don't have to do anything if you don't want to, we can just... go to sleep."

Shiro's forehead creased. "I don't... know. I want- I want to do stuff with you... I just..."

Lance gave a small smile. "Let me put a face mask on you?" He offered. 

Shiro gave a small smile back. "Okay." He agreed. "I'd like that."

“Yeah?” Lance asked with a smile and Shiro nodded. 

Lance’s face lit up and he moved in the bath, twisting to pick up a pot that Shiro hadn’t even noticed he’d laid on the side of the bath, along with a few bits and pieces and twisting so that he was straddling Shiro's lap. 

"Okay." He said with a hum, picking up a few hair slides and clipping Shiro's hair out of his face. 

Shiro hummed softly, letting his eyes close as Lance ran his fingers through his hair and secured the pins. 

It was a few moments before Shiro heard him take the lid off of the pot and then Lance was spreading a cool gel over his face. 

"Smells good." Shiro said and Lance hummed in response. 

"Uh huh, it's coconut." Lance said as he finished spreading it on. 

"Are you gonna do it, too?" Shiro asked, opening his eyes. 

"Mm, you wanna put it on me?" He asked, handing Shiro a few more hair slides. 

"Okay." Shiro said with a soft chuckle, brushing Lance's hair off of his face and securing it. "I can't promise I'll be any good, though."

Lance laughed and handed him the tub. "It's really easy, you just gotta spread a thin layer on my face, okay? Just like I did on yours."

Shiro looked at it sceptically for a moment and then shrugged, getting a little on his fingers and beginning to smear it over Lance's skin. 

He couldn't stop himself from pressing a small kiss to Lance's lips before he spread the mask around them, Lance giggling as he did so. 

"There." Shiro said as he finished up, leaning back a little to get a better look. 

"Thanks, baby." Lance said with an affectionate smile. 

"Now what?"

"Now we wait for it to set, and then we peel it off." Lance said. 

"Mm, okay." Shiro hummed, washing his hands on the bath, before finding his hips and gently resting on them. 

"Can I paint your nails?" Lance asked and Shiro raised an eyebrow. 

"Can you what?"

"Paint your nails." Lance said with a small pout, as if he expected Shiro to say no. 

"I-"

"I found some on the last planet we were on and I haven't tried it out yet. You can do mine too, if you want." 

"I don't think I'll be very good, I've never done it before."

"Is that a yes...?" Lance asked, smiling hopefully. 

Shiro gave a small sigh. He was hopeless. Absolutely hopeless and absolutely gone on Lance. 

"Yes, okay." He said with a heavy nod, feeling absolutely no regret whatsoever at the way Lance's eyes lit up. 

He got up out of the bath, opening the cabinet, and getting a few bottles out, setting them on the edge of the bath and climbing back into Shiro's lap.

"What colour d'you want?" He asked and Shiro hummed. 

"I don't mind, pick one for me." He said and Lance opened the bottle of pastel pink. 

"Lay your hand here, for me." He said, and Shiro rested his hand flat on the side of the bath.

Lance carefully started to paint the colour onto his nails.

“That look okay?” Lance asked, and Shiro managed to tear his gaze up from where he was focused on Lance’s movements to meet his eyes with a small quick nod. 

“Yeah.” He confirmed. “It’s a nice colour.” 

“Mm, I thought so.” Lance hummed. “Watch close, okay? It’s not hard, but just remember what I’m doing now. Just broad straight strokes over the nail, mhm?”

“Mhm.” Shiro agreed, refocusing his eyes as Lance started on the next nail. 

“Then once this has dried we do a second coat and a top coat of clear to make sure it doesn’t chip, okay?”

“You know a lot about this.” He said with an amused smile, flicking his eyes up to Lance’s. 

“I have two older sisters.” Lance said, rolling his eyes. “I was pretty much their baby doll for a good few years of my life. I know it all.”

Shiro chuckled. “I see.” He nodded. 

“What colour did you wanna paint mine?” He asked and Shiro hummed, glancing to the little collection. 

“Maybe this one?” He mused, picking up a bottle of a nice dark red colour. That would look good with Lance’s lipstick. 

“Mm, that’s a nice one.” Lance agreed as he finished. “I don’t suppose I have a chance of painting your prosthetic?”

Shiro laughed and bit his lip. “I don’t think so.” He said. 

Lance pouted. “I figured. Oh well, we’ll just do these.” He said, picking up Shiro’s hand and lightly blowing on his nails. 

“They look nice.” Shiro said and Lance rolled his eyes. 

“Not yet they don’t. It’s too weak.” 

Shiro’s brows furrowed as he looked at them. “They do look nice.”

“Well, they’ll look nicer in a minute.” He said, waiting a little more for them to dry before starting on the next coat of polish, solidifying the colour. 

“Oh, you’re right.” Shiro hummed, nodding as he watched. “They _do_ look nice.”

“See, I told you.” Lance said with a grin, finishing up with the second coat and moving onto the top once it had dried. 

He picked up the colour that Shiro had picked and unscrewed the lid, handing it to him. 

“Think you can manage?” He asked and Shiro looked between the brush and Lance’s hand warily for a moment, before taking it from him. 

“Of course.” He said, hoping that it came off more confident than he felt. It was stupid, wanting to do this well, he just didn’t want to make them look bad for Lance, when Lance had done his so nicely. 

“Okay, then.” Lance said, laying his hand flat where Shiro’s had been and Shiro began to brush the polish on. “See? Not so hard.” He said. 

Shiro made a non committal noise, frowning in concentration, brush catching the skin around Lance’s nail here and there as he went. 

"You're doing well, I promise." Lance said with a small affectionate noise as Shiro made a small growl of frustration. 

"Are you sure?" He asked, biting his lip, finishing up and moving onto the other hand. 

"Positive." Lance said, nodding quickly. "The first time Hunk tried to paint my nails he completely butchered it."

That comforted him a little bit as he glanced between the clean polished nails on his hand and the messy ones on Lance's. 

"Promise." Lance said again and Shiro nodded. 

"Okay." He said softly. "If you're sure. You can take it off if you don't like it, I won't be offended."

"Shiro, it's fine." Lance laughed, rolling his eyes. "Stop stressing so much you're supposed to be relaxing, you know."

"Oh, yeah." Shiro said. "I guess so."

He looked at it intently as he finished and moved onto the other hand, painting it in the same manner. 

"You can put the second coat on the first hand now, okay? It'll probably have dried." 

Shiro nodded and painted over the nails again, doing the second hand in turn and letting Lance guide him for the top coat. 

Once they were both finished and dry, Lance carefully began to peel his face mask on, being careful of the nails, and Shiro copied him, doing the same, wincing a little as it pulled at his skin, making a small pained noise. 

"There you go, you brave boy, all done." Lance teased, and Shiro huffed, glaring at him. "D'you want a sticker?" He asked with a giggle. 

Shiro rolled his eyes, unable to stop the smile tugging at his lips. 

"Let's get out, come on." Shiro said, helping Lance up and then getting out of the bath, pulling the plug.

Lance grabbed onto Shiro’s arm to steady himself as he got out of the bath and Shiro quickly wrapped him up in a towel, and then dried himself off, scooping Lance up with his towel and carrying him into the bedroom and flopping down onto the bed with him. 

Lance giggled as Shiro buried his face in his neck and blew out a long breath, giving a soft contented sigh, wriggling to get his arms out of the confines of the towel and looping them around Shiro’s neck, gently stroking at the nape of his neck. 

“Feeling better?” He asked gently and Shiro gave a small nod against his skin. 

“Yeah.” Shiro mumbled back. “Thank you.” 

“You don’t need to thank me.” Lance said with a soft laugh. “I know what it’s like. It’s not… the same for me, of course… But I still know what it’s like. I have days like that too, you know?”

Shiro nodded and pressed a soft kiss to the curve of his neck. “Still. I appreciate it.”

Lance shook his head with a small fond laugh. “Okay, okay.” He said. “Now let me out of this damn towel so we can cuddle properly.”

“Mm, don’t wanna move.” Shiro said with a good natured smile, Lance squealing as he blew a raspberry into the curve of his neck.

“Shiro!” Lance squeaked, squirming on the bed under him, and Shiro stayed unmoving for a good half a minute, before relenting and rolling off of him, letting Lance untangle himself from the towel and quickly dry himself off. 

Shiro rolled onto his back and lifted an arm, Lance quickly curling up under it with a soft sigh. 

“You tired yet?” He asked softly.

“Are you?” Shiro asked, gently stroking his hair with one hand. 

“That’s not what I asked.” Lance said, glancing up at him with an affectionate smile.

“I know.” Shiro said softly. He wasn’t tired yet, and in all honesty, he wasn’t sure what sort of time he was going to fall asleep tonight, if at all. But if Lance was tired, then he wanted to let him sleep. 

“Read to me for a bit?” He asked softly, reaching to get Shiro’s tablet off of his bedside table and handing it to him. 

Shiro looked at him for a moment and then took it from him, opening up the book they were on and dimming the lights. 

He read to Lance for a little while, finishing the next chapter and Lance giving a sleepy nod when he asked if he was up for another. Shiro shook his head and put the tablet down, pressing a kiss to Lance’s head and turning the lights off.

“You’ll fall asleep and then I’ll have to reread it to you tomorrow.” He said softly as Lance nestled against him with a sleepy nod and a yawn. 

Lance was asleep in moments, after that, and Shiro wasn’t sure quite how long he laid awake in the dark for, Lance’s steady breathing against him as he slept, but he must have eventually fallen asleep, because the next thing he knew he was waking up with a start in a cold sweat, breathing shakily and heavily as Lance cradled him in his arms.

“It’s okay, sweetheart.” He murmured as the memories of Shiro’s nightmare came back to him and he clenched his jaw, clinging tighter to Lance. “I’ve got you, it’s okay.” He said gently. 

Shiro nestled himself against Lance as much as he could, as Lance gently stroked over his skin and held him close. 

Shiro sniffed and buried his face in the crook of Lance’s neck. It had barely been a week since his last nightmare. He supposed he should have been grateful that they were so sparse these days, but… that didn’t make it any better.

He knew, really… that he should have been grateful, because he had used to have them nightly. Used to have been terrified to go to sleep each night because of it, and he’d been slowly healing and they’d been getting better. 

But that didn’t make him feel better right now, skin still clammy and cold as Lance made soothing shhing sounds and pressed kisses to the side of his head. 

“Okay?” Lance asked softly after a long few minutes and Shiro gave a small nod.

He _was_ okay. No matter how bad it had been, no matter how bad it was to know that those things that plagued his dreams were real and had happened… they weren’t real anymore. They weren’t happening anymore, and Shiro was safe. He was safe right here wrapped up in Lance’s arms and nothing was going to hurt him. Nothing was going to hurt either of them. 

He supposed that was why he hadn’t wanted to come to bed… deep down he’d known that this was going to happen. And it had, but it was okay. Because Lance had spent all evening trying to take care of him and make him feel better, and he was doing that now, too. He wasn’t running away, he wasn’t finding Shiro a burden. He was just caring for him, just trying to make sure that he was okay. 

Shiro just wanted to stay here like this forever, hide away from the universe and just stay nestled in Lance’s arms, just like this. Right here, where it was safe and warm and comfortable. Because Lance was everything to him. 

It was times like this that Shiro found it very difficult to stop his mind from wandering, from going back to exactly where he put such an effort into staying away from; his feelings for Lance. His unrequited feelings for Lance. Because… this wasn’t love, not love-love, not that love. Lance would have done the same had it been Hunk or Pidge having a nightmare, that much he knew. 

It wasn’t because it was him, or because he loved him in any sort of other way, it was just because he loved him as a friend, like he loved his other friends. And that was that, that was the cold and painful truth, but it was, at least, the truth, and Shiro wouldn’t even let himself think for a moment that it wasn’t, because that would just make it hurt more. 

The same things he told himself over and over and over, and there was nothing he could do to escape them. He frowned, trying to bury himself further against Lance, shut his mind up a little and just enjoy the warmth that Lance was providing him with, just enjoy being held so lovingly and tenderly, but not for a second pretend. 

 

***

 

Shiro had barely realised how quickly time was passing them by until they were scheduled to return back to Earth. 

That was… well, that was a whole lot of issues that he needed to sort through in his head, but for now they would have to wait; he had a lot of work to do. 

Lance had kept to himself since the news, which had confused him for all of ten minutes while he distractedly worked, before realising that they were headed back to Earth just in time for the annual meet up on the anniversary of Allura’s death, and now he was kicking himself for being so thoughtless.

It was always a sombre time for everyone, and Shiro was in no way exempt from that. He and Allura had been close, and he’d really, really cared for her. But Lance was… well, she was Lance’s girlfriend, and yes that had still been all relatively fresh and new at the time, but… that love was still there. For all of them. And so for Lance it was just… well, it was a lot worse. 

And Shiro had forgotten. Not forgotten forgotten, but… it had slipped his mind enough that he hadn’t been paying attention. On a regular day, Shiro would have finished up early to go and find Lance and make sure that he was okay, but the closer they got to Earth the busier they were, and they couldn’t really afford the time. 

He hurried back to their room once he could manage to get away, though, finding Lance curled on their bed on his tablet. 

“Hey.” Shiro said softly, and Lance flinched, telling him that he hadn’t heard the door open. 

“Hey, Shiro.” Lance said, sitting up and putting his tablet down, offering him a small smile. There it was; that wall.

“You okay?” He asked, coming over to the bed and sitting down next to him. 

“Yeah, of course.” Lance said, nodding, with a smile that Shiro would have taken to be genuine a few months ago. 

Shiro looked at him for a long moment and then looked away. He couldn’t push. Pushing never did any good. 

“Okay.” He said, leaning over to press a kiss to Lance’s temple. “I missed you, today.” He murmured.

Lance gave a small contented hum, smiling. “You wouldn’t have wanted me around, you’re too busy.”

“I always want you around.” Shiro countered, wrapping an arm around Lance’s waist and pulling him close, burying his face in the curve of his neck and inhaling. 

“I’m too distracting.” Lance said, gently lacing his fingers through Shiro’s hair.

“I like being distracted.” Shiro said back, pulling Lance into his lap and Lance huffed an amused laugh, shaking his head.

“I’m not sure how much your crew like you being distracted, Captain.”

“Screw them.”

Lance gave an airy laugh. “Oh, that’s a wonderful attitude to have, _Captain_.”

Shiro pouted. “I missed you.” 

“I know.” Lance said softly, leaning back and taking Shiro’s face in his hands, looking at him with a small troubled frown. 

“You know you can talk to me.” Shiro murmured softly, Lance’s brows furrowing further for a moment before he looked away.

“Shiro, I’m fine.” He said, looking back at him with a smile. “Really.”

“Okay.” Shiro agreed. “But you don’t have to be.”

“But I am.” Lance countered, tone final. 

Well, he couldn’t say that he hadn’t tried. 

“Alright, alright.” Shiro said, holding his hands up in surrender. 

“What about you, are _you_ alright?” He asked, and Shiro’s instinct was to close up right back at him, but he knew that that would do more harm than good.

“I’m getting there.” He said. 

Lance nodded, gently cupping the back of his head. “I’m glad.”

Shiro smiled softly, relaxing into his touch, brows slowly furrowing the longer he looked at Lance.

“What?” Lance asked, a small affectionate smile on his face. 

“You didn’t say you missed me too.” He pouted and Lance laughed.

“I missed you, too. Happy?”

“But did you really?” He asked, pouting harder.

Lance rolled his eyes and pressed a soft kiss to his lips. “I really did.” 

“Okay.” Shiro agreed, though he felt a little uneasy. That wasn’t really what had been at the forefront of his mind. “Lance?” He asked softly after a few moments.

“Mm?” Lance asked as he gently stroked the hair at the nape of Shiro’s neck. 

“What are you going to do?”

Shiro watched as Lance processed that, and realised what he meant. “Oh.” He said, frowning a little. “I don’t know. Probably… probably go back home for a while.”

Shiro nodded. “Right. Yeah. That’s good.”

“Yeah.” Lance agreed, though neither of them sounded convinced. “What about you?”

“Uh… Well, same old, I guess. Probably stay at the Garrison for a little while and then head back out.”

“Right.”

They were both quiet for a long moment before Shiro opened his mouth to speak again.

“I’ll-”

“You won’t.” Lance cut him off before he could even finish. How had he known what he’d been going to say?

“Lance…” Shiro said softly. Of _course_ he would miss him. 

“Just don’t, alright?” Lance said with a sigh. “I don’t want to hear it.”

Neither of them said anything for a few moments, and then Lance got out of Shiro’s lap and picked up his tablet again. 

“I’m going to take a bath.” He said, and then got up. 

Shiro watched him go with an uneasy feeling in his stomach. That wasn’t an invitation, that wasn’t- anything good. Why was Lance so difficult to talk to? When it was Shiro that needed comfort Lance was right there knowing all the right things to say to help him, but when it was Lance? He wouldn’t even let Shiro get a word in to _try_. 

Like he didn’t want it. Or didn’t want it from Shiro. Shiro didn’t know. It was all such a mess in his head of things he knew and things he thought he knew and things that conflicted with both. But one thing was for sure, at least; this was coming to an end very, very soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa i have a lot of feelings abt this chapter ;u;
> 
>  
> 
> honestly im so glad that youre all enjoying this so much ;u; it makes me so so happy to read all of your lovely comments <3


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance was gone. 
> 
> And he wasn’t coming back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the end has come but bear with, you guys know me too well for that

Things had been fine between them after that, and neither of them had brought it up again. They’d arrived back at Earth far sooner than Shiro would have liked, and Lance hadn’t moved out of his room and into his own just yet, but it was unspoken between them that he would one of these days; the Garrison had enough space, and they would be parting ways after the meet anyway. 

Shiro didn’t know if he was reading too much into it, but things hadn’t been the same. They were fine, sure. But more of a ‘fine’, than a fine, and Lance had closed up even more. He supposed that when they were in space, it was different, but now being faced with the fact that this was about to be over, neither of them really knew what exactly it was and how they were moving forward. 

Lance still slept in his bed, though, and they still had sex every day, and Shiro was desperately trying to hold onto every moment he could, trying to map out and remember every inch of Lance’s body before he wasn’t his to touch anymore. 

The meeting was upon them before they knew it, and everyone else had flown in. They usually switched between where they had it, but this year it was being held at the Garrison, because the Atlas had only docked less than a week beforehand, and it was easier. 

Once everyone started coming in, Shiro saw less and less of Lance. Hunk and Pidge arrived first, which was fine, that was- logical that Lance was spending time with them, and Coran next. 

Keith was last to arrive, but Shiro was grateful when he did. At last he could finally stop feeling like he was intruding. It was stupid, really, because he’d been just as much a part of everything, and he’d spent years in space with Hunk, Pidge and Coran, too, but… He hadn’t been as close to them as Lance had, and he didn’t want to intrude on that. 

Everyone seemed to be in relatively good spirits, however, Lance and Coran helping Hunk with food while Pidge, Keith and Shiro set everything else up. 

He hadn’t really had enough of a moment alone with Keith to talk about things, and he felt bad to immediately spring his problems on him when they hadn’t talked for so long; Keith didn’t deserve that, so he kept quiet. 

Things were fine as they ate, everyone chattering about what they were getting up to these days, Lance conveniently leaving a lot of details out in his descriptions of what he had been up to, recounting how the Atlas had somehow ended up on the same planet as him and they’d picked him up. 

Pidge had suggested that he’d be bored for so long with not much to do, but Lance had simply laughed, a hint of a blush on his cheeks as he told her that he’d found ways of staying entertained. 

Oh, he’d found ways, alright. 

Shiro took his turn, too, telling them about the things that the Atlas was doing, and everyone listened with interest. 

After they’d eaten, everyone went outside, the weather surprisingly warm, and Shiro had hung back as Pidge, Lance and Hunk chased each other around, laughing wildly. 

Shiro smiled softly at them as he watched. 

“You’re terrible with men, you know that?” Keith said, coming up beside him and playfully bumping their shoulders together. 

“Oh yes.” Shiro agreed with a sigh, not taking his eyes off of Lance’s laughing face. 

“And this is definitely a feelings thing.”

“Oh yes.” Shiro agreed once more, willing himself to look away, look at Keith, he was talking to him, after all. But no, he kept his gaze trained on Lance, wondering if this was really over already. 

“Have you talked to him about that?” Keith asked, and Shiro sighed, looking down and then looking at Keith. 

“I can’t.”

“Bullshit. You _won’t_.”

“Keith…” Shiro sighed.

“Don’t ‘Keith’ me. How bad is it?”

Shiro looked at him for a long moment, wincing at his stare. “I’m in love with him.” He muttered after a few moments. 

“Figured as much.” Keith said, raising an eyebrow. “You have to tell him.”

“I can’t do that. It’s not… it’s not like that, we’re not like that. He doesn’t feel the same way, and he’s going home to see his family and I’m going back into space, and it wouldn’t work out.”

“Is he still sleeping with other people?”

Shiro frowned. “Well- no, but we’ve been on the Atlas-”

 

“You’ve been on a ton of planets. He could have hooked up with someone if he wanted to.” 

“I’m convenient.” Shiro grumbled, folding his arms over his chest. “I can’t, okay? I just can’t.”

“You’re a real idiot, Shiro.” Keith said with a sigh. “Why can’t you just let yourself be happy?”

“Look, I’ll think about it, okay? Can we please just stop talking about it? It’s hard enough that I have to _think_ about it all the time…”

“I just want you to be happy, Shiro.”

“I am.” Shiro said. He was. He… had been, up until now. “What about you?” He asked, eager to change the subject. “Have your eye on anyone?”

Keith cleared his throat. “Maybe.” He said and Shiro raised an eyebrow.

“Okay, we are _definitely_ talking about that, _right now_.” He said and Keith rolled his eyes, grumbling softly to himself. 

 

***

 

The rest of the day went by quickly, and everyone retired to their rooms for the night, ready to set back out either the following morning or the one after. 

The later it got the more uneasy Shiro felt, as Lance didn’t come back to their room. 

Shiro managed to fall asleep at about four in the morning maybe, only being awoken a few hours later by Lance, crashing into his dresser.

“Mm, Lance…?” Shiro asked sleepily, turning over and opening his eyes to blearily look at him. 

“Oh, hey, Shiro.” He said with a forced smile, rubbing his side and opening the drawer, getting his clothes out and putting them into a bag. 

“What are you-?”

“I’m going back to see my family.” He said, gathering all of his things and then going into the bathroom to get his things from in there. 

Shiro sat up, running his hands over his face and yawning. “When-?”

“Today.” He said. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you.” He said, zipping up the bag and coming back into the bedroom. 

“You didn’t mean to… were you not… going to say goodbye?” He asked, a flash of hurt running through him. 

Lance looked at him for a few moments, forehead creased. “Yeah, of course I was.” He said, though Shiro didn’t believe him. 

“Lance…” Shiro said, trying to figure out what on earth was happening and what on earth to say. “Are you… okay?”

“I’m fine.” Lance said, just as he said every other time that Shiro asked him if he was okay. And just like all of those times, Shiro didn’t believe him. 

“You didn’t come back last night.”

“I stayed with Hunk.” 

“Hunk said he hadn’t seen you.” 

Lance clenched his jaw. “I don’t need to explain myself to you.” He said defensively and Shiro was just getting more and more confused the more things that came out of Lance’s mouth. He stumbled up out of bed, walking over to Lance.

“Hey.” He said softly, laying a hand on Lance’s arm. “What’s going on?”

“I told you, I’m going _home_.” He said, flinching. 

“Lance, baby-” Shiro started, desperately trying to understand why Lance was being so cold towards him. Had he done something? Them not continuing to hook up was one thing, but this…?

“ _Don’t_ call me baby.” He said harshly, pulling his arm out of Shiro’s hold. But- Shiro had always called him baby, and Lance had always called Shiro baby, too. “Don’t- call me at all.”

Shiro stilled at that, blinking at him. “Don’t… call you?”

This… Shiro didn’t know what the hell was going on. Even last time they’d parted ways they’d still kept in touch, they’d still called each other, which had turned into every day calling which had turned into- whatever the hell had been going on for the past few months. 

“Did I… do something?” Shiro asked, voice small and hurt.

“No- no, you didn’t, you-” Lance said, softening a little, before steeling himself and clenching his jaw. “I just need to be alone, I just need- you to not call me.”

“Okay.” Shiro said resignedly, stepping back from him and holding his hands up. “Okay.”

Lance gave a small nod, looking at him for a few moments longer before turning tail and leaving, door sliding shut behind him. 

That was that. Shiro _knew_ that was that. There was no other goodbye, there was no Lance coming back and pushing him against the door and kissing him like there had been before. That was that and Lance had gone and Shiro had no idea what the fuck had just happened. 

He’d been expecting a return to a normal friendship, yes. Maybe a few calls here and there, maybe a few more than usual because they’d gotten closer, and it would hurt like hell, but that would be that. 

He hadn’t… been expecting Lance to completely cut him off. No, if he’d thought _that_ would hurt then _this_... 

Was there something he could have done to prevent this? Was there something he’d done to encourage this? Was…? He didn’t know.

He sat numbly back down onto the bed, barely realising as hot tears tracked down his cheeks. 

That was that. Lance was gone. He loved Lance, and Lance didn’t love him back, and Lance was gone. Lance didn’t even want to _talk_ to him, let alone be with him. Lance didn’t want him. Lance didn’t want this. These past few months had been… nothing. They’d been nothing to Lance, _he’d_ been nothing. He’d been nothing more than a convenient fuck. 

And he’d known it would hurt, all the way along he’d known he was setting himself up to get hurt, but he hadn’t anticipated _this_. 

Was he… supposed to go after him? Try and find out what was wrong? No, he knew that would be no use. If Lance didn’t want to talk about something then he wasn’t going to, no matter what. 

That really was that, then. 

Shiro didn’t… understand what had happened. Just a few weeks beforehand they’d been sitting in the bath together painting each others nails, and Lance had held him after his nightmare, promising him that he would always protect him and keep him safe. 

That hadn’t seemed like just friends to Shiro. That hadn’t seemed like someone who didn’t care, and who would cut him off. 

It had been the day they’d set their course for Earth that had done it, he knew that much. Things had been almost the same but not quite since then. Maybe it had been the awareness that this… was… well, Shiro didn’t even know how to put it into words, he sounded like a broken record in his head, saying the same thing over and over, the same reasoning over and over.

The truth was, that no matter how much he thought about it, no matter how much he analysed the last few weeks, he was never going to get any closer to knowing what had happened. He was never going to know what was going on in Lance’s beautiful head. He’d never known up until this point in his life, and he wasn’t about to start being a mind reader now.

The thing was that Lance always gave off the illusion of being an open book. Lance always gave of an air of vulnerability, like he’d just open right up to you if you asked, and Shiro had made the mistake for far too many years of assuming that that was correct. But it wasn’t. Because Lance liked to protect himself, and Lance didn’t like to be vulnerable, and when he felt vulnerable he closed himself off, and there was nothing that Shiro could do to make Lance let him in.

And now he’d missed his chance. 

Maybe if he’d tried harder, while they were on the Atlas, then this wouldn’t be happening. Maybe he’d thought he was being considerate but was actually being tactless. Maybe Lance just needed someone to push all of those times that Shiro had decided not to. It didn’t matter now, he supposed, because Lance was gone, and he wasn’t coming back.

Lance was gone. 

And he wasn’t coming back. 

He fell numbly back against the bed. He’d never felt like this before, never had the chance to. 

He’d had boyfriends and girlfriends back in highschool but never anything serious. And then there was Adam… He’d loved Adam so much, he’d been so so in love with him, but he had still been young and stupid and Adam had given him a choice and Shiro had chosen. 

When he’d left he’d been so filled with anger that Adam had given him such a choice, that Adam had broken up with him over his desire to fulfil his dreams, that he hadn’t had the chance to be broken hearted about it. Then there was the longing and the missing thrown in throughout their years with Voltron, but by then too much time had passed.

Shiro had known exactly what he’d done to end up in that situation, he’d known exactly what he’d said to make Adam leave, and he hadn’t regretted it. 

And then there was Lance. 

There was Lance and Shiro didn’t _know_ what he’d done. He didn’t know what had ended it or what had been the moment in Lance’s head that had made him think ‘enough’. ‘No more’. He didn’t know if it was because of him, or if it was because of Lance, and he didn’t know if there would have been anything he could have done to change his mind. He didn’t know what was going on in the slightest and it was so bewildering and overwhelming and it made his head thump and ache just trying to decipher it all.

There was no one else. There were nameless people that Shiro couldn’t remember the names of back from highschool that he hadn’t really felt anything for, anyway, and then there was Adam, and then there was Lance. 

And so he’d never felt like this before, he’d never had his world pulled out from beneath his feet in quite this way before. 

He didn’t realise just _how in love_ with Lance he was, until he knew that he was gone, and that he wasn’t coming back. 

That Shiro had done something, or Lance had simply decided he was finished with him, and wanted nothing more to do with him. And the worst part was, that Shiro knew there was something more there, that there was something eating at Lance, but Lance wouldn’t let him help. He’d never let him help. 

Going back to sleep at this point wasn’t really an option, though he felt exhausted, he hauled himself up and got dressed, figuring that he might as well try and get some of the preparations done for heading back into space. 

As he expected, he didn’t really get a lot done, and spent most of the day just sitting in his chair and staring off into space, going over the same things in his head again and again and getting no closer to making sense of it, and by the time he retired for the night, he was exhausted. 

 

***

 

He was woken the following morning by someone shaking him awake. 

“Lance…?” He murmured sleepily, face crinkling as he tried to hold onto the remnants of sleep. 

“‘Fraid not.” Came Keith’s voice instead, and Shiro grimaced. “I take offence to that. Sorry I’m not your pretty little pornstar, but-”

“Don’t-” Shiro frowned, finally managing to open his eyes. “Don’t call him that.”

“I was joking, calm down.” Keith said, frowning. “Are you-? Your eyes are red, have you been crying?”

Shiro sighed, flicking his gaze away. He could never hide anything from Keith. Just as it seemed he could never hide anything from Lance. Was he just a fucking open book around here?

“Is it because Lance left?” He asked softly, sitting down on the bed next to him. “Did you tell him how you feel?” Shiro gave him a look. “Right, of course you didn’t.”

“He’s… he’s gone already?” Shiro asked, biting his lip. 

“Uh, yeah, he left last night.” Keith said in confusion. “Didn’t you… know? I mean, weren’t you there to say goodbye?”

Shiro gave a heavy sigh, letting his eyes fall closed. “Lance broke up with me.”

“Lance- what?”

“I mean, I know we were never dating, but… for all intents and purposes he broke up with me. He told me not to call him, not to contact him. He didn’t even… say goodbye, he just kind of told me not to call and left.”

“He- why would he do that?”

“I don’t _know_ , Keith. I don’t know. I just know that he’s gone now and whatever I thought it was, it _wasn’t_ , and I never should have gotten involved with him in the first place.” He said bitterly, hating the tired way his voice came out; hollow and broken.

Except he didn’t mean that, not really. He wouldn’t give up this time he’d spent with Lance for the world, not for anything. He would never choose a life in which this didn’t happen and he didn’t fall in love with Lance. 

“But you did.” 

Shiro pinched the bridge of his nose and nodded. “I did.”

“And you fell in love with him.”

Shiro sighed and looked at him. “Yes.”

“So what are you going to do now?”

Shiro shrugged helplessly. “I don’t know. Try and move on? Respect him enough to do as he asked and not try and contact him even if it’s going to kill me?”

“Shiro…”

 

“What else can I do? Go after him? After he specifically said not to? What’s the point, other than to make a fool of myself?”

Keith didn’t say anything for a few moments. “Sam told me that there are a few light repairs that need doing to the Atlas, so you’re going be stuck here for a little longer than planned.” 

“What- does that have to do with anything?” He said, wrinkling his nose. Great. That was just great. 

“I’m just saying think about it. It might give you a bit more time to think about what you want to do.”

“I can’t do anything-”

“Shiro.”

“Alright, fine. I’ll think about it.” He said, sighing. 

“Okay.” Keith nodded. “I have to go, I just came to say goodbye, actually.”

Shiro frowned. “Oh.”

“Don’t look like such a kicked puppy.” Keith said with a soft smile, putting his arms around Shiro in a tight hug. “I’ll see you again soon enough, okay? And you’ll actually be able to reach me when you call, so _please_ , call me if you need me. For anything. Especially this.”

Shiro nodded, hugging him back just as tightly. “I don’t know what advice you can give me, you’ve never been in love.” He mumbled and Keith snorted.

“No, but I know Lance. And I know you, and that’s enough.” 

Shiro nodded against him. “Okay.”

“It’s gonna be okay.” Keith said, pulling back to look at him. 

“Is it?”

“It is. Lance would never intentionally hurt you.” 

Shiro scoffed. “Yeah, tell that to my broken heart.” 

Keith rolled his eyes. “Keep me posted, and call me before you do anything dumb.”

“Dumb? I don’t do dumb things.” Shiro said, narrowing his eyes and Keith laughed, standing up.

“Yeah, okay Shiro.” He said, shaking his head with a smile. “I’ll see you soon, okay?”

“Yeah, stay safe.” 

“You too.”

 

***

 

Trying to move on was easier said than done. They were due to be back on earth for another month at least for repair work to the Atlas, though Shiro wasn’t sure what exactly was wrong with it, Sam assured him that everything was fine, it was just better to err on the side of caution before flying it back up into space. 

That was great for Shiro, because it meant that he didn’t even have work to bury himself in. 

The first week was hard. He’d gone from spending most of every day in Lance’s presence, and each night wrapped up with him in bed, to nothing. Nothing at all. Maybe if they were still friends and he was allowed to call him then it would be easier. But he wasn’t and so they weren’t. 

Furthermore, having no work to bury himself in, meant that Shiro was at rather a loose end. 

Looking back on it now, maybe this was what Keith had meant when he’d said call me before you do anything dumb.

This was strangely reminiscent of when they’d first gotten back to Earth. Shiro had gotten drunk and hooked up with someone then, too. 

Though then was more of a thank-god-I’m-alive-I-need-to-get-laid kind of hook up, and this was more of a my-heart-hurts-every-day-and-I-need-to-get-fucked-out-of-my-mind kind of hook up.

That was what Lance had said, hadn’t he? Sometimes he needed to feel it, and sometimes he just needed to get fucked out of his mind. 

Shiro had been feeling it ever since he’d left. Getting fucked out of his mind didn’t seem like such a bad option, now. 

He’d travelled a little way from the Garrison to a bar, though thankfully it wasn’t too far out, sat down at the bar and bought a drink. 

He’d only had to buy the first. He was on maybe his fourth now, this guy had bought them for him. Nothing like Lance, thank god. Taller than Shiro himself was and just as built. 

Made a nice change, he supposed, so there was that. 

He hadn’t brought up who he was thankfully; he had to have known. The arm was… a bit of a dead give away, being the only guy on Earth to have one. That and the fact they were only about fifteen minutes away from the Garrison. Might have been a little hint if the arm, the hair and the scars weren’t enough. 

When they’d first gotten back home Shiro had been self conscious about those, and surprisingly, he wasn’t feeling it now, but at this point, he just didn’t _care_. Didn’t care about much, really.

And so he’d let him buy him a drink, and then another and another, nodded when he’d asked if he wanted to get out of there and gotten into the back of a cab with him all the way back to his place. 

Then he was being crowded against the door the moment it closed and kissed. Kissed hard and deep and rough and Shiro was already tugging the mans jacket off of his shoulders and groaning into his mouth. 

It was around about that moment that Shiro realised he hadn’t even asked his name, and yet he was too concerned with the way he was licking into his mouth, swallowing each of his moans as he wedged a thigh between Shiro’s legs to properly care. 

Shiro’s gasp was audible as the man broke their kiss, dragging his bottom lip between his teeth before kissing down his jaw. 

“Marks?” He asked, voice low and gravelly and Shiro moaned softly, nodding. 

“Yes.” He replied breathlessly- yes, he could mark him, cover him in hickeys, because he _wasn’t_ anyone’s. He wasn’t anyone’s and he certainly wasn’t Lance’s. 

He wasted no time sucking and biting at his neck, Shiro rutting his crotch against his thigh, cock hard and aching in his pants. 

His head felt thick and clouded as he pushed back against the man, stumbling forwards with him into the room, clutching at his shirt to steady himself. 

“Bedroom-” He heard himself say, and then he was being lead into another room and pushed down onto a bed, clambered on top of and kissed again. 

It had been- well, it had definitely been more than six months since Shiro had been drunk, so it was hitting him hard, but he needed this. He needed it so badly. 

This man was pressing him against the mattress and kissing him deliciously hard, rutting their crotches together, hands roaming under Shiro’s shirt and over his chest and Shiro was arching into each of his touches. Oh, yes, he needed this. 

Shiro whined, kissing him needily back and moaning into his mouth, before the other man pulled up, sitting back on Shiro’s thighs and looking down at him, quickly pulling Shiro’s shirt up over his head and smoothing his hands over his chest. 

“How d’you want…?” He asked, voice breathy and gruff, and Shiro shuddered, trying to focus his thoughts. 

“Fuck me.” Was all he could manage to get out, moaning as the man slid his hand down to cup Shiro’s erection through his pants, and then made quick work of unzipping his pants, Shiro lifting his hips enough for him to pull them down his thighs and pull his cock out. 

“Yeah…?” He asked, an aroused smirk on his face as he took Shiro’s cock in his rather large hand, skin calloused and rough, beginning to jerk him off.

“Yes, yes, yes…” Shiro moaned eagerly, hips bucking into his touch. Fuck, he’d forgotten how much he liked sex, he’d been wallowing too much in self pity to even jerk off since Lance left. 

Lance- no, no, he didn’t need to be thinking about Lance right now, no. He focused on the feeling of the mans hand around his cock, not slender or smooth like Lance’s, no everything was completely different. 

Maybe that was half why Shiro had asked to be fucked. Lance had never fucked him, and he wouldn’t be able to compare it. 

This wasn’t a big deal. Lance did this all the time. He’d been hooking up with people right up until they’d picked him up. It was just sex. 

The man worked his cock for a few more minutes, until Shiro was panting and writhing underneath him, before moving off of him and letting Shiro take the rest of his clothes off, doing the same. 

He got a condom and some lube next, and Shiro rolled over onto his hands and knees, resting on his forearms against the mattress. 

The man stroked over his ass, squeezing as his cheeks before thumbing gently over his hole, Shiro’s breath catching in his throat as he bit his lip. 

“You done this recently?” He asked, and Shiro shook his head. 

“Not for… a while.” He admitted. 

“I’ll be gentle.” He replied. 

“You don’t need to be.” Shiro countered and the man chuckled. 

“I’ll make sure you feel it, baby.” He said, and Shiro heard the snap of the cap on the lube, and felt the coolness of it against him a few moments later. 

Shiro huffed a soft breathy moan at the first finger, already feeling thick inside of him and reminding him of just how long it really had been. 

He took his time stretching Shiro out, prepping him liberally before finally deeming him ready, Shiro having decided he was ready about ten minutes beforehand, though he knew he would thank him tomorrow for it. 

His cock was already drooling on the bed beneath him, a new little glob of precum seeping out with each teasing press to his prostate, and Shiro was muffling himself with the pillow, having it gripped tightly in his arms. 

He wouldn’t have let Lance muffle himself. 

Shiro nearly sobbed at the first press of his cock into him, finally, _finally_ , and he rocked his hips, trying to slip more of his cock into him before the other man was ready to give it. 

“Easy.” He murmured, hands resting on his hips as he pressed his cock in the rest of the way, giving a soft groan as he was finally fully seated inside of him. 

He was big- fuck, he was big. Shiro hadn’t actually seen his cock yet, and either he was really, really big, or he just felt big because it had been so long since Shiro had had something inside of him. 

“Please…” Shiro whimpered, panting into the pillow, the man smoothing his hands over Shiro’s lower back, before resting back on his hips as he began to draw his cock out of him. 

Shiro whimpered as he pressed back into him, slowly at first, getting him used to it and logically- Shiro knew he should be grateful for that, tomorrow he would definitely be grateful, but right now he didn’t want that, he just wanted it hard and rough, just wanted to forget everything.

He wanted to forget his name, but most of all he wanted to forget Lance’s. 

He eased him into it, Shiro begging in whimpered little whispers, before he finally picked up the pace, fucking into him harder and harder, gripping his hips tightly, and practically punching gasps and moans out of Shiro with each breath. 

His head was still clouded, clouding over more and more as he lost himself in the pleasure of it, not aware of anything but the drag of the thick cock inside of him, letting out a sob into the pillow as he hit into his prostate again and again and again. 

He nearly lost it when he reached around to wrap his hand around Shiro’s throbbing cock, squeezing tightly around him and jerking him quickly in time with his thrusts, leaning over him and panting against Shiro’s ear, biting down on the lobe as Shiro whimpered. 

He wasn’t going to last, he wasn’t going to last, he wasn’t going to-

He came with a loud cry, body jerking as he spilled over the mans hand, clenching hard around his cock as he slammed into him, groaning against his ear as he fucked him through it. 

“Too much?” He asked brokenly and Shiro shook his head, no. He wanted to feel him cum inside of him, even if it was through a condom, even if he was an oversensitive overstimulated mess, he _needed_ it. 

The man grunted as he fucked his cock into him, panting hard against him, pressing Shiro into the mattress, and fucking into him deeply as he came, hips stuttering against him as he ground his cock into him, riding out his orgasm before carefully pulling his cock from him. 

He got off of the bed, tying the condom off and throwing it away and padding into the bathroom. 

Shiro gave a tired sigh, chest still heaving as he rolled over onto his back, gaze following where the man had gone. 

He came back a few moments later with a damp cloth, offering it to Shiro who took it gratefully and used it to clean the mess of lube between his legs. 

“Thanks.” He said, voice hoarse and rough and the man nodded. 

“You okay?” He asked, tilting his head and Shiro nodded. 

“Yeah. That was- great, thank you.”

“You don’t need to thank me.” He said with an amused smile. “I should probably be the one thanking you.” Shiro tilted his head curiously and the man shook his own. “Nevermind. You can crash here, though, if getting home’s gonna be an issue.”

“You sure?” Shiro asked, though admittedly, he couldn’t really feel his legs and he didn’t fancy getting a taxi back to the Garrison this late at night. 

“Sure.” He agreed and Shiro belatedly wondered if it was too late to get his name. That was probably something that should have been done before they fucked. 

“Thanks…” 

“Callum.” He supplied and Shiro nodded. 

“Right.” He said, biting his lip with an embarrassed smile.

“Shirogane, right?” He said tentatively, as if Shiro would be offended that he knew who he was.

“Mmm.” Shiro confirmed tiredly. “Just Shiro.”

“Okay, Just-Shiro. You should get some rest, it’s late.”

“Mmm.” Shiro agreed with a tired nod.

“Water?” He asked, picking up his glass from his bedside table and offering it to him. “You’ll thank me tomorrow.” He said, raising an eyebrow when Shiro looked sceptical. 

“Thanks.” Shiro said, sitting up a little and taking a long swig, before handing it back to him and flopping down against the mattress. 

He was vaguely aware of Callum having a drink and then laying down next to him in bed, pulling the covers up around them, but Shiro was asleep within moments. 

 

***

 

In all actuality, Shiro didn’t think about Lance for a full ten minutes after he woke up, blearily looking around the foreign room in the daylight and turning over to see an empty bed beside him. 

He wasn’t surprised, Shiro hadn’t been keeping track of the days so it could very well have been a week day and he could very well have gone to work. The smell of coffee wafting through gave him pause, though, and he gave a soft sigh with a small smile on his face, sitting up and stretching. 

He eyed his crumpled clothes on the floor, really not wanting to put them on until he’d had a shower, groaning softly and getting up, stretching again. 

He quickly shooed thoughts of Lance from his mind, because this whole thing had been to take his mind _off_ of it, not to wonder how on earth Lance had taken such monster alien cocks in the past.

He shook his head, padding into the bathroom and finding a robe hanging on the back of the door, desperately hoping that he wouldn’t be considered rude to put it on, and doing so anyway, before padding out into the kitchen. 

“Morning.” Callum said, turning around with a smile as he poured the coffee into a mug. “You want some coffee?”

“Please.” Shiro said, sitting down at the table. 

“So…?” Callum asked, bringing the coffee to him and sitting down opposite him with a smile.

“So?”

Callum gave a soft laugh, as if he knew something that Shiro didn’t and shook his head. “Well, it’s not every day you get to meet Takashi Shirogane.” Or fuck him, for that matter.

Shiro rolled his eyes with a smile. “I’m not all that.”

Callum scoffed. “I’d have to disagree with you.” He said with a teasing smile and Shiro felt himself flush a little.

Shiro shrugged. “I don’t know. Nothing too exciting, we’re here for repairs for a bit longer than planned, all boring.”

“So… I can see you again, maybe…?” He asked, tilting his head, not sounding like he was expecting anything, though, which Shiro was grateful for.

“As in…?” He asked, biting his lip.

“As in whatever you want. I’m not going to suggest I’d be so lucky as to be allowed to take you out, unless that’s something you wanted.”

Shiro bit his lip. “Ah.” He said. “I’m not exactly, um… available…? Emotionally, that is.”

Callum laughed and nodded in understanding. “I see, I see. You wanna talk about it?”

Shiro shrugged. “I doubt that’s something you’d want to hear about.”

Callum hummed. “Well, you never know. Sometimes you just need to talk about stuff to someone who doesn’t know you, and that you never have to see again.”

Shiro looked at him for maybe a full forty seconds before he gave in. “His name is Lance.” Shiro sighed, running his hands over his face. 

“Ah.” Callum said thoughtfully. “Lance as in…?”

“Yeah.” Shiro said, blowing out a breath. “That Lance.”

“Huh.” 

“Mmmhm. It’s rather a long story.”

“Well, like I said, if you want to tell it, then I’m listening.”

Shiro looked at himi for a long moment. “Okay… well, long story short, I guess… is that we were sort of, friends with benefits for a while, we got really close, we picked him up from a planet last time we were in space and he spent two months with us on the Atlas. I’m hopelessly in love with him, and he doesn’t feel the same way. And now we’re back home he’s gone back to Cuba, and he’s completely cut me off, and told me not to call him, and I really don’t know how to deal with it.”

Callum furrowed his brows as he listened. “I feel like… there’s something missing there. He spent two months with you?”

“Yeah.”

“And then he just, cut you off.”

Shiro looked down, nodding. “Yeah. I don’t know what happened. There’s no… thing that I’m leaving out because I’m ashamed, or whatever. We were really close, we were- basically dating. At times I was… convinced he felt the same way. Things kind of changed after we set the course for Earth, he was a bit on edge and I figured it was because we were coming home for our annual meeting we have for all of us, and it’s the anniversary of Princess Allura’s death, who was his girlfriend. He didn’t come to bed that night, and I woke up the next morning to him gathering his stuff. He said that I shouldn’t call him, and then he left. That was… about a week and a half ago now, I guess.”

“That… I’m really sorry. That’s really shitty of him.”

“Yeah… well… I know I always knew it wasn’t going to last, but I… always pictured us still being friends, you know? We’ve always been friends, he’s one of the few people that I trust with my life. But he doesn’t feel the same way, and he certainly doesn’t- _love_ me.”

Callum was quiet for a few moments. “Then that’s his loss.” 

“You think?” Shiro asked with a sad smile.

“Absolutely.” 

“And now I’m stuck on Earth with no work to distract me. So it’s uh… hell, pretty much.”

“Yeah. I can imagine. Nothing worse than a fresh broken heart.”

“Yeah.” Shiro agreed with a heavy sigh. 

“Well, I mean it, if you want to go out, I’ll give you my number. Not like a date, of course, just… something to take your mind off of it.”

“Yeah…?” Shiro asked, biting his lip.

“Yeah, of course. I mean… who do you have? To talk to, that is?”

Shiro sighed. “Not really… well, anyone. Keith is- galaxies away, and my other friends are scattered about with their own lives, now… I don’t… have anyone.” Shiro realised, with a frown. Oh.

“Maybe that’s why you latched onto Lance so much?” He suggested. “Because you’re lonely, and he made you feel important. Less lonely. Like you had someone.”

Shiro clenched his jaw and swallowed, nodding. “You’re probably right.” 

He _was_ lonely. Sure, he had the Atlas crew for most of the year, but they were his _crew_ , not his _friends_. He hardly saw Keith these days, and he didn’t begrudge that at all- Keith was busy and he was successful, and Shiro wanted what was best for him. He’d never really had anyone like Lance, before. And he didn’t know how to get used to not having that, anymore. 

“Well, I gotta get going in a little bit, so I’ll leave you my number, and you’re welcome to stay and use the shower, and stuff before you go.”

Shiro smiled gratefully. “Why are you so nice…? You don’t know me.”

“Maybe I’m lonely too.” He said with a shrug, smiling. 

Shiro smiled back, biting his lip as Callum got up, retreating out of the kitchen and into the bedroom. 

Well, that was a surprisingly unexpected turn. Maybe he… had a new friend? Shiro wasn’t exactly sure when he’d last made a new friend, so this was… nice, this was really nice. And someone that thought it was Lance’s loss, too, not Shiro’s, as he kept telling himself. 

Shiro stayed past Callum leaving, after popping his head in to say goodbye and reminding him to feel free to use the bathroom or have something for breakfast.

Shiro took advantage of that, having a slice of toast and then getting in the shower, taking his time, before finally getting out and dry, dressing and calling a cab to take him back to the Garrison. 

 

***

 

Needless to say, however, things were never quite so simple. And if hooking up with a stranger hadn’t been what Keith meant when he’d said call me before you do something dumb (though really, despite the crippling guilt he felt, that had turned out rather well), then this _must_ have been it.

So instead of Keith’s name being on his screen as he made the call, it wasn’t. It was Lance’s. 

It had been two and a half weeks. Nearly three. And nothing. Shiro wasn’t really getting any better, and as much as Callum had been a good lay, and he’d made a sort of new friend… he was feeling overwhelmingly guilty about it all.

It was stupid, really. Because Lance did it all the time. Lance slept around, Lance filmed fucking porn videos with people he met that day, and yet it was eating Shiro alive that he’d slept with someone else.

_Lance is a slut, though_ , Shiro’s mind supplied him with. _You’re just a slut for Lance_.

Which was true, really it was. But Shiro and Lance weren’t dating. Lance didn’t _love_ Shiro, didn’t have _feelings_ for him, so he was perfectly entitled to get dicked down by whomever the _fuck_ he pleased.

He’d thought about it maybe, a few times. Doing it again. Just to spite him, or just to spite the voice in his head, rather. That he could damn well be a slut too, if he wanted. He could enjoy sex without feeling as shitty as he did. 

But it had been nearly three weeks. And nothing was getting easier, and Lance was still plaguing his near every waking thought, and the Atlas was due to be leaving again in another maybe two weeks, and Shiro couldn’t handle it. He couldn’t. 

He couldn’t in his right mind, stay here moping about and then go out back into space for months on end without knowing that he at least _tried_ to figure out what happened. That he had tried to respect Lance’s wishes, but finding out what had happened was more important. 

Because it hadn’t been something Shiro had done, he knew that much. Even when he was at his lowest and trying to convince himself of that he couldn’t. It just wasn’t the case. _He knew it_. 

So it was something on Lance’s end. And how could Shiro say that he loved him if he didn’t try and find out what was wrong?

It was late, really late, and Lance being back in Cuba now, meant that he was an hour ahead of him, but here he was, still calling him. 

And maybe it was because Shiro was feeling particularly shitty tonight, and that he was a little bit drunk, but he just really _really_ wanted to hear Lance’s voice. 

It rang, and it rang, and it rang. 

And then it went to voicemail. 

Shiro wasn’t surprised, of course he wasn’t, but he was disappointed. Devastated, maybe. And maybe it was late, and Lance was asleep, but somehow, he just felt as though he’d seen the call, and decided not to answer. 

Well, he supposed that only time would tell, because Lance would know about the call in the morning. 

And then morning came, and then morning went. 

And still nothing. 

Still, he wasn’t surprised. Devastated though, definitely. 

 

***

 

It was two days before Shiro heard anything, and at this point the days were bleeding into one and he was just waiting for the day that someone would tell him they were ready to fly back into space. God, he never should have gotten involved with Lance. Was it truly worth _this_?.

It was late, and Shiro was actually asleep, tonight. About three in the morning when he checked his phone, which meant that it was four in the morning for Lance, and in all honesty, Lance could very well have been fast asleep in bed not missing Shiro at all, and Shiro could have just been having a very vivid dream. 

Because this was unlikely. 

But there it was, Lance’s name on the screen, clear and bright in the dark room. 

It took him a moment to rub at his eyes, the bleariness clearing away a little as he answered the call. 

“Lance?” He asked, after a beat of silence. 

He heard a sniff on the other end of the line. Oh. “Hi.” Came his voice a few moments later, watery and shaky and small. 

“Hi.” Shiro breathed back, hardly daring to believe that he might _actually_ be awake, and that Lance might _actually_ have called him. 

Lance sniffed again, breathing thick and heavy down the line. 

“D’you want to talk about it?” He asked gently, because he knew there was no point in asking Lance if he was okay, or what was wrong. 

“No.” Lance said softly back. 

“Okay.” Shiro said, and the two laid there in a silence for a good few minutes, just listening to each other’s breathing and the occasional sniffs and tiny little noises that Shiro could only take to be very muffled, very small sobs. He only wished that Lance would let him help.

“I’m sorry.” Lance mumbled a few minutes later. 

That was weighted. Shiro didn’t even know what Lance was apologising for, and there was a lot, to be honest. 

“Do you miss me?” Lance asked at Shiro’s silence, voice shaking with a vulnerability that he hadn’t heard from Lance yet. 

Shiro let out a soft hollow laugh. “I feel like I’m dying.” He said honestly. 

Lance sniffed. “I miss you.” He said instead of responding to that. “So much.”

Shiro felt his heart leap in his chest despite everything. Hearing out loud was… something else, he just really hoped he wasn’t about to wake up. 

Lance continued before he could reply. “When are you leaving?”

“A week, maybe?” Shiro said with a tired thoughtful hum. 

“Spend it with me.” It wasn’t a question. Because a question could elicit a rejection, and if there was one thing that Shiro knew Lance was terrified of, it was rejection. 

“Okay.” He agreed. 

“Mean it?”

“Mean it.” 

“Okay.” Lance said softly, blowing out a breath. 

“But Lance?” Shiro said, biting his lip and Lance made a small noise of affirmation. “I need you to talk to me. Please, I can’t do this.”

“I will.” Lance said after a few moments. “I will.”

“Okay.” Shiro agreed. He didn’t ask for anything more, because Lance had called him, had asked for him, _missed him_ and that was enough. 

He didn’t need his reasons, not yet. He didn’t need to know what happened, as long as Lance still wanted him, and things would be okay. 

Neither of them said anything after that, and neither of them hung up. Shiro just listened to Lance’s breathing as it evened, and eventually he stopped sniffling, and fell asleep.

Shiro laid awake for a little longer, half afraid to go to sleep, because this was the first time since the meet that his chest had felt a little lighter, and there was a little glimmer of hope. 

Spend it with him, he’d said. That meant… going to Cuba, presumably? For the last week. 

And it wasn’t a come and visit me, it wasn’t a we need to talk, it was a spend it with me. Lance was asking him to spend the week with him, which meant that there was hope that things would go well. Well enough for Shiro to stay the a week, at least. Which was a good sign. A really good one. 

He must have fallen asleep eventually, though because the next thing he was aware of was that he was very comfortable and warm, and his eyes were very much closed. 

Also that he couldn’t hear Lance’s breathing on the other end of the line anymore. His heart dropped and his eyes flew open, but upon looking, the call history was there.

Which meant it had happened. And Lance had asked Shiro to come. 

There was a message from him, too. 

_you don’t have to come if you don’t want to_

_I want to._

_okay_

The response was almost immediate and Shiro pretty much flew out of bed, gathering his clothes and shoving them into a bag, changing quickly. He needed- he needed to go now. 

Realistically, getting a plane shouldn’t have been too bad. He should have gone to the airport and gotten a plane, it wouldn’t have taken long. 

But also he was Takashi Shirogane. And so nabbing a little ship wasn’t too difficult, and that meant that he’d be able to get there within the hour, instead of three, and all that waiting around at the airport. 

And really, he was Lance starved enough as it was, and now knowing that- that he could go to him, that there was hope. How was he supposed to go the airport? 

No, he wasn’t about to do that. So with everything set into the ship and the coordinates put in, he set off, asking Lance for his exact address and putting that in once he’d sent it.

The anxiety didn’t settle in until he was well into the air. Fuck. Fuck, he was going to see Lance. Lance who had completely and utterly rejected him, and completely and utterly broken his heart. 

And yet here he was, blindly chasing after him on a glimmer of hope, desperate for something- _anything_.

He felt sick by the time he landed, landing in a field, to which he could only assume to be one adjacent to the McClain household, really hoping that he hadn’t destroyed any precious crops in his haste. 

He switched it off and grabbed up his bag, exiting the ship with a deep breath. He could do this. He could absolutely do this. 

He dropped his bag the moment he saw Lance, heart in his mouth as Lance stopped still, before breaking into a run towards him. 

Shiro had only taken a few steps forward before Lance was throwing his arms around him, hitting him with full force and it was all Shiro could do not to fall backwards, and wrap his arms firmly around Lance’s waist instead, holding him as tightly against him as he could manage. 

Neither of them let go for what felt like forever, just desperately clinging to one another, before Lance finally pulled back a little to look at him.

It was with a look that Shiro couldn’t read, as he gently cupped his face. 

“I’m sorry.” He murmured, and Shiro knew he meant it. 

Shiro nodded, electing to lean in to press a gentle kiss to his forehead instead of a response. He couldn’t just… say that it was okay. Not yet. Not when he didn’t know why or what had happened. But it was enough. 

Lance’s eyes fell closed at the contact, and he bit down on his lip, brows furrowing. He reached down to pick up Shiro’s bag and then laced their fingers together with his other hand, beginning to lead them up to his house. 

People were waiting outside of the house- he could make them out more clearly as they got closer. Veronica, and who he took to be Lance’s mother. 

“Lance, you left the back door open.” She said, raising an eyebrow and Lance gave her a sheepish smile. 

“Sorry, mama.” He said. “This is Shiro.” He said, glancing to Shiro and then back to her. 

“It’s lovely to finally meet you, Shiro.” She said with a warm smile. 

“You too, Mrs. McClain.” He smiled back. 

“No, no, none of that, it’s Rosa.” 

Veronica looked at him sceptically with her arms folded across her chest. “Well, looks like I was right.”

Right about…? Something that Shiro couldn’t remember, probably. He wasn’t sure that he wanted to ask. Probably something from that conversation they’d had.

“It’s good to see you, Captain.”

“You too, Veronica.” He said back with a lighthearted smile, Veronica’s eyes narrowing as she glared at him, and Shiro’s smile only grew wider. 

“Don’t think I won’t hurt you.” She said and Shiro gave a small laugh. 

“Trust me, I’ve been terrified of you ever since we picked him up.”

“Damn right.” She said back with a smirk. 

“Should I-?” Lance asked, tilting his head. 

“Probably not.” Shiro smiled back, shaking his head. 

Lance shrugged, pushing past his mother and sister to lead Shiro inside. 

It was somehow exactly what Shiro had expected. Everything that Lance’s childhood home should have been. 

He lead Shiro up the stairs, pushing open a door and into his bedroom. He put Shiro’s bag down, and turned to look at him apprehensively. 

Shiro looked around, taking in the room. It was so… Lance. It was all so Lance. It was a mixture of everything that Lance held dear to him. 

The walls were an ocean blue, decorated with a mixture of photos of his friends and family, and posters and art. 

There were various posters of different constellations and galaxies, and a few from the Garrison, and then there were paintings of sea turtles and reefs, too. 

His ceiling was littered with those glow in the dark stars, and a little hanging solar system from one corner. 

On his window seat there were various stuffed animals. The generic teddies, and there was a pink bunny that looked very well worn and well loved, along with cushions and little fluffy things. The biggest of all was a great white shark that spanned the whole seat, and the others were dotted around it. 

On his desk there was a multitude of papers and notebooks, but there was also photo frames, and he could make out Lance in his Garrison uniform in one of them. In another he could see a young Hunk and Pidge, crowding the camera and grinning, and then in a third it was the three of them together. 

There were seashells dotted about here and there, too, on shelves, on top of books, on his window sill, and Shiro could only imagine a little Lance having collected them throughout the years from the beach. 

His rug matched his bedsheets in shade, though his rug had little fish swimming about printed on it, and the fairy lights that were strung in the corner above his bed lightened his sheets a little. 

This was… this was everything that Lance was. Everything that Lance had ever been, and here he was, standing in it. Having been invited inside, and there was Lance, looking at him so tentatively and apprehensively. 

And maybe it was that he’d missed him, or maybe it was the fact that he hadn’t taken down the poster with his, Sam and Matt’s faces plastered on it from where it hung proudly on his wall, but Shiro had never been more in love. 

“We should talk.” Was what came out instead and Lance looked down, nodding. “Hey.” He said softly, gently cupping Lance’s cheek, and Lance looked up at him with glossy eyes. 

It was now that Shiro realised just how deep Lance’s vulnerability complex ran. That talking meant sharing, and that meant being vulnerable. It meant explaining why he had run away, and what he was scared of. 

“It’s okay.” He said gently, sitting down on the bed, keeping their fingers laced together and pulling Lance against him. “It’s just me.”

“Just you.” Lance said with a watery smile as if that was the most ridiculous thing that Shiro had ever said. “Just the most important person to me. The person I’m most scared of losing, most scared of disappointing.”

Shiro frowned softly. “You could never lose or disappoint me, Lance.” 

“Didn’t I?”

“Confuse and hurt me? Yes. Disappoint me? No.”

“You say that like it’s any better.” He said, frowning and gently stroking his fingers along Shiro’s jaw. “I can’t undo that.”

“No.” Shiro agreed. “But you can make it better.”

“How?”

“Talk to me, angel.” He said and Lance looked almost pained. 

“I don’t deserve that.”

“You don’t get to decide what you deserve.”

Lance sighed, biting his lip, brows furrowed.

“Tell me what happened.”

“I don’t know where to start.”

“Anywhere, just somewhere. _Please_.” He said and maybe Lance could tell how much he needed it, because he gave a small nod.

“It’s hard.” He said softly. “To talk about. Because… you think I’m- this thing, and I’m not. I’m not that. At all.”

“Okay.” Shiro said, admittedly, a little confused. 

“All I’m good at is sex.” He said, holding a hand up to stop Shiro before he could protest. “All I’m good at is sex.” He repeated. “You never wanted me. We’ve known each other for years, and yet you only showed the slightest bit of interest in me when you saw me getting fucked. When you first invited me to come with you I said no, because all you wanted me for was sex. You can’t say you didn’t, because that’s all it was. We fucked a few times and you asked me to come with you and I couldn’t. Because you’re… you’re on my fucking wall.” He said with a watery laugh, gesturing to the poster. 

Shiro smiled softly at it, biting his lip and looking back to Lance.

“You’re Takashi Shirogane. And you’re also Shiro. Someone I… was stuck in space with for years and always had a terrible crush on and you never looked at me twice. I didn’t… we have something. Because of everything we’ve been through, we’re close. We’re special. You and me and Keith and Hunk and Pidge and Coran. Just like you and Matt.”

Shiro nodded, winding his arms around Lance’s waist and gently stroking over his skin. 

“And all I’m good for is sex. All I’m good at is taking cock and getting fucked and making people cum. And to think that… I was becoming that for you, too… That- that that was more important, suddenly. I just… couldn’t. And I know that you don’t just want me for sex. I do. I’ve known how you feel… for… a while now. But I’m terrified.”

He broke off for a moment and Shiro didn’t make to say anything, just waiting for him to collect his thoughts enough to carry on. 

“Ever since… as long as I can remember I haven’t been good enough. In Voltron, I always saw myself as the seventh wheel, even if not everybody else did… _I_ did. And ever since the war ended I’ve used- sex to cope, I guess. With… everything, with Allura’s death, with… anything that’s bothering me, with my inferiority complex, because at least I can feel like I’m good at something… with… with how fucking boring shit is now. And so to consider that maybe suddenly I was more to you than that… That… you saw me as more than someone to warm your bed and your friend. Like someone you could love, maybe?”

Shiro gave him a small tender smile. This made sense, of course it made sense. It was ridiculous, and all could have been completely avoided, but… it made sense.

“That’s scary. That’s pretty fucking terrifying. Because I’ve never been anything to anyone. Not like that. Not even… Not with Allura. I was convenient. I’m not saying she didn’t love me because I know she did. But she wasn’t in love with me. And we wouldn’t have lasted, I know that now. So to suddenly… see the way you look at me, the way you hold me, the way you kiss me. The way you just- you look at me like that- like you’re fucking looking at me right now, like I’m the best goddamn thing you’ve ever seen. And I don’t know… _how_. And it’s like I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop. Waiting for you to realise that you could have anyone you wanted, and you could have anyone a million times better than some dumb whore.”

“Lance.” Shiro said, frowning hard. “You’re _not_ a dumb whore.” Shiro had been doing a pretty good job thus far of keeping his thoughts to himself and just letting Lance speak, but he wasn’t about to sit back and let him say that. 

Lance looked at him and gave a small helpless shrug.

“And I don’t ever want to hear you say that again.” Shiro said sternly and Lance bit his lip. 

“Okay.” He said with a tiny nod. “And then… I guess, I panicked, when we got back here. Because it’s really hard. And I miss her so much. But all I could think about was you, and that… I’m so scared. Because I know how you feel, but it feels like a how long? Like a… how long before he realises how much better he could do? And I _know_ that’s not fair. But I can’t help it. Because I’m in so fucking deep and I’m so scared.”

“It’s okay, my love.” Shiro said as Lance’s eyes welled with tears and he pulled him against him, Lance settling his head in the crook of his neck. “It’s alright. I know, I know.”

“I’m sorry.” Lance mumbled, pressing himself as close to Shiro as he could. “I’m so sorry, I know I… I know, I was an idiot, and I hurt you really badly…”

“Lance.” Shiro said softly, and Lance pulled up to look at him. “It’s okay. I understand, and I forgive you.”

“Mean it?”

“I mean it.” He said, nodding. “I really, really mean it.”

“Why did you call me?” He asked softly, frowning and biting his lip.

“Because I was drunk, and missing you terribly.” Shiro said. 

“I heard the call.” Lance admitted.

“I had a feeling you did.” Shiro said, nodding. “But you called back.”

“I was having a breakdown.” Lance said with a small laugh and Shiro nodded.

“You were. But now I’m here.” He said and Lance bit his lip with a small smile.

“You are.” Lance nodded, though he was frowning. 

“And that means…?”

“I don’t think that’s my question.” Lance said softly. “I think you’re the one that gets to answer.”

“Lance…” Shiro said softly, cupping his face. “I’ve wanted this the whole time.”

“Yeah…?” Lance asked, frowning as he bit his lip.

Shiro nodded. “Pretty much, yeah. I mean I asked you on a date the what- second time we hooked up?”

“That was a date?”

Shiro laughed, shaking his head. “Yes, that was a date. I’ve been in love with you for-”

“You’re in love with me?” Lance asked with wide eyes.

“Yes.” Shiro answered honestly. “I’m in love with you.”

“Since- since when?”

“Well, I realised it for the first time I think after that first nightmare. But I think I’d felt that way for a while.”

“Oh.” Lance said, cheeks flushing a little. “I, um- I…”

“You don’t have to say it back, sweetheart.” Shiro said gently as Lance bit his lip nervously. “It’s okay.”

“I don’t think- I’m ready yet.” He said softly. “But you know- you know I have… really strong feelings for you, right?” He asked and Shiro nodded. “You know how I feel.”

And he did. It was everything that he’d been denying himself for months. Everything that he’d told himself wasn’t real, that he was making up. Because Lance might not have been ready to say it, but they both knew that Lance was in love with him, too. 

“I know, angel.” Shiro said, and Lance gave a small nod. 

Lance smiled softly, and gently pushed Shiro backwards onto the bed, clambering over him a little more and nestling against him, hooking one leg over one of Shiro’s.

“I like your room.” Shiro murmured after a few moments and Lance looked up at him. 

“It’s a bit childish, now. I don’t think anything in it has changed since I was fifteen.”

“It’s perfect.” Shiro said softly. “It’s… everything that it should be. It’s _your_ room.”

Lance gave a soft laugh and shook his head. “That’s… really sappy, Shiro.” 

Shiro laughed and shrugged. “Maybe.”

“Definitely.”

“Is your family going to be wondering where we are…?” Shiro asked after a few moments, feeling entirely too comfortable to move, but not wanting to make a rude first impression.

“Mmm, no.” Lance said with a hum. “I’m sure Veronica would take care of it, anyway. Unless you wanted to go down…?”

Shiro held Lance a little tighter. “Mm, not yet, let’s just stay like this.”

Lance nodded, letting out a soft contented sigh and they lay in a comfortable silence for a few moments before he said anything else. 

“You’re so strange.” Lance said softly, leaning up over his chest and gently brushing his hair out of his face, looking at him tenderly. “You should be mad at me.”

“I’m not.”

 

“I know you’re not. But you should be. You should be so mad at me, not… holding me like this.”

“Like what… like this?” Shiro asked with an amused smile, stroking over Lance’s back, and Lance nodded. “Like this?” He asked, leaning up, nudging their noses together, but not quite closing the distance, leaving it up to Lance. 

“Yeah.” Lance breathed, gently brushing his lips over Shiro’s. “You shouldn’t-”

“And yet,” Shiro said, kissing him softly again. “I am.” 

A small whining noise caught in Lance’s throat, as he cupped Shiro’s face, gently lacing his fingers through his hair as he reciprocated the soft press of Shiro’s lips over and over. 

“I missed you.” Shiro murmured against his lips. 

“Don’t say that.” Lance breathed back, kissing him a little more firmly.

“It’s true.” Shiro said as Lance shifted on the bed so that he was more in his lap, not breaking the kiss to respond. 

He kissed him like that with a touch of desperation for a few more minutes before breaking away, resting his forehead against Shiro’s, eyes screwed tightly closed. 

“I’m sorry.” He murmured, taking in a breath and sitting up, frowning down at him and biting his lip. 

Shiro looked up at him, gently lacing their fingers together, electing to sit up, and press a soft kiss to the underside of Lance’s jaw in lieu of replying.

“It’s okay.” Shiro said after a few moments. “I promise. I understand, okay? I’m not saying that you made the best judgements, and that we didn’t get hurt, but we’re working it out, okay? And we’re okay.” 

“We’re okay.” Lance repeated softly, eyes fluttering closed and he tilted his head up a little as Shiro began to press feather light kisses over his jaw and his neck, just brushing gently over his skin. 

Lance gently squeezed his hands, and Shiro squeezed back, before breaking them apart in favour of sliding his hands over Lance’s torso, pulling him closer and slipping them under his shirt. 

Lance shuddered under his touch, bringing his hands up to lace into Shiro’s hair as he kissed over his skin, kissing a little harder in the curve of his neck as his fingers traced over his sides and his waist. 

Lance breathed the softest of whining noises, tipping his head back a little further and breathing out a soft sigh, stroking the back of Shiro’s head. 

Shiro let his teeth graze over Lance’s skin as he kissed it, hands exploring Lance’s body, hiking his shirt up, Lance shuddering a little. Shiro tugged his shirt up a little more, Lance pulling back enough for him to pull it off over his head, before Shiro reattached his lips back to his skin, suckling a mark just above his collar bone. 

Lance breathed the softest of moans, curling his fingers in Shiro’s hair, letting Shiro pull him closer in his lap where his hands rested just above his hips on his waist. 

Once Shiro was satisfied with the darkening mark, he began to kiss down Lance’s chest, gently nipping as he went, Lance’s breath hitching as he pressed a soft kiss to one of his nipples, fingertips lightly pressing against his scalp. 

He moved past it, though, catching the skin just beside in a series of soft kisses, before gently pinching it between his teeth and sucking softly, Lance giving another tiny whimper, subconsciously holding Shiro’s head in place with his grip in his hair. 

Shiro hummed, releasing that little bit of skin and flicking his tongue out over Lance’s nipple, Lance’s breath audibly catching in his throat. He pressed a wet kiss to the bud, gently sucking for a few moments before releasing it, and kissing across his chest to the other and doing the same. 

“Shiro…” Lance murmured, voice breathy and barely audible. 

“Mmm?” Shiro hummed, looking up at him as he pressed wet gentle kisses over the bud, finding Lance with his head back and lips parted, breath coming in short tiny gasps and cheeks dusted pink. 

“Please…” He continued, eyes momentarily fluttering open to meet his own. 

“Please what, angel?” He asked, and Lance audibly whimpered at that. 

“Please, I want you.” He breathed and Shiro tilted his head a little, gently smoothing his hands over Lance’s sides. 

“You want…? Here? Now?” Shiro asked, voice coming out slightly higher than usual. 

Lance looked down at him in confusion. “Was that not…? You- you took my shirt off.”

“Yes.” Shiro agreed. That had happened. “But that wasn’t-”

“It… wasn’t?” 

Shiro expected Lance to be somewhat offended at that, but really, he just looked thoroughly confused. 

“No.” Shiro said softly, shaking his head. “I just wanted to kiss you.” 

Lance looked more confused at that, still breathing shallowly as he bit his lip, brow furrowing. 

Oh, Shiro realised. _Oh_. Lance had… never been intimate with anyone, before. He’d had probably more sex than all of their friends put together, but he’d never… had this sort of intimacy. The kind where Shiro unclothed him because he wanted to kiss every inch of his body, trace his fingers over old battle scars and kiss each and every one of them, hold Lance close and never let him go. 

Of course, Lance had thought he’d wanted sex. He hadn’t, really, he _hadn’t_. Not that he would have been… terribly opposed, but it hadn’t even crossed his mind. Just how much he’d missed him and how much he needed to be all over him, just kissing and loving him. 

“Oh.” Lance said softly, looking away. 

“Not that- I don’t want to.” Shiro said gently, cupping his face. “Just- your family’s downstairs, and this is, well, your childhood room, I don’t know. I don’t want to desecrate it.”

Lance smiled and bit his lip. “Exactly. It’s my _room_. I came for the first time ever in here when I was fourteen, and then a million times after that.” He said, raising his eyebrow and giving Shiro a coy smile. “They won’t bother us, and we can lock the door. But it’s okay if you don’t want to, I’m not going to be offended.”

Shiro looked at him for a long moment, gently stroking his face. “Okay.” He said at last. “Go and lock the door then.”

Lance got up and out of his lap, walking shakily over to the door to pull the lock across and then coming back, Shiro sitting on the edge of the bed and pulling Lance close to him, wrapping his arms around his waist and pressing a kiss to his abdomen. 

Lance gave a gentle hum, lacing his fingers through Shiro’s hair. Shiro eventually pulled back, unbuttoning Lance’s pants and pulling them down, along with his underwear, freeing Lance’s mostly still soft cock. 

“I missed you.” Shiro murmured, smoothing his hands over his waist and pressing soft kisses over his hip bones.

“Don’t…” Lance said softly, biting his lip.

“Let me.” Shiro said, looking up at him. “Please.” 

Lance didn’t say anything, but he didn’t protest, stroking Shiro’s head as he kissed him, kissing down his pelvis and to his cock, Lance squirming a little and breathing out a soft laugh that changed halfway to a breathy moan as Shiro began to gently suck at his shaft, kissing down to the head and gently flicking his tongue out across it. 

He glanced up at Lance as he carefully took his cock into his mouth, wrapping his hand around the base and gently sucking, coaxing Lance to hardness as Lance bit down on his lip with a soft whine, brushing Shiro’s hair off of his face and holding it back so he could look at him. 

Lance’s hips stuttered as Shiro kept sucking his cock, gently bobbing his head over his shaft, and Shiro slid his hands around to cup Lance’s ass, lightly pulling it towards him in encouragement. 

Lance gave a small tentative thrust forwards into his mouth, and Shiro moved his head over his shaft to meet him as he did so, looking up at him. 

“I’ve never, um-” Lance admitted softly, biting his lip. “I’ve never done this before.”

Shiro tilted his head, strangely surprised at that, before pulling off and pressing kisses down his shaft. 

“No?”

Lance shook his head. “I’m always the one on your end.” He said with a fond smile, gently brushing his thumb over Shiro’s bottom lip. “Not many people suck me off, normally. So I’ve never-”

“Do you want to?” Shiro asked, cutting him off and Lance hesitated. “You don’t need to do it hard, if you don’t want to. But I would very much like to suck you off, either way.”

Lance bit his lip and gave a small nod. 

“Okay.” Shiro said, bringing one hand around to take Lance’s and give it a soft squeeze. 

Lance laced their fingers together and didn’t let go when Shiro made to pull it back, so he kept their fingers interlocked as he parted his lips and looked up at him. 

Lance took his cock in hand, pressing it to Shiro’s lips, and gently rubbing the head over them before pushing into his mouth, sliding his hand around to cup the back of Shiro’s head. 

Shiro gave a soft encouraging moan, making himself keep his head in place, as much as he wanted to sink down onto Lance’s cock to meet him, he made sure to let Lance set the pace and tentatively fuck his mouth, figure out what he liked. 

He hadn’t yet pressed in all the way when he pulled his cock back out, shallowly thrusting into his mouth a few times, watching Shiro intently as he did so, clearly entranced. Shiro looked up at him throughout, eyes fluttering closed momentarily every so often as he moaned softly around Lance’s cock, Lance whining as his hips stuttered.

Shiro hummed around him again, with a little more intent and Lance whined again, a little more desperately, pushing his cock into Shiro’s mouth a little deeper, tip hitting the back of his throat and Shiro moaned appreciatively, focusing all of his effort on keeping his throat nice and relaxed as not to gag. He didn’t want to scare Lance off, but as much as Lance had never done this before, it had been a great number of years since Shiro had done this, too, and he wanted it to be good for him. 

Lance kept up the tentative pace for a bit, getting used to it and exploring Shiro’s mouth with his cock, only letting it hit the back of his throat a few times, before pulling back out and lightly rubbing his tip over Shiro’s bottom lip, smearing a little precum on it, before pushing back in. 

Shiro let his jaw go slack around his cock, eyes fluttering closed as Lance gently stroked over his cheek with his thumb as he thrust his cock into his mouth, getting a little braver with each thrust, soft moans spilling from his lips as he pressed into his mouth. 

He was still being very soft, despite everything, like he was afraid to go too hard for Shiro’s sake, or maybe for his own. Because he hadn’t been in a situation like this before, Shiro didn’t think. He could have been wrong, of course, but as far as Shiro was aware… Lance had only really had hook ups before, and Shiro was his first on-going arrangement. 

And in those hook ups, just like his porn videos reflected, Lance was playing a role, he was always playing a role. He was either desperately submissive, allowing his partner to perform their every whim and desire upon him, or he was more in control. But when he was more in control it wasn’t in a dominant way, and it wasn’t for himself. It was in a way that focused on giving his partner the most pleasure, because that was what Lance did best. Giving other people pleasure. And that was why people rarely sucked him off, because he was never the focus in that way. 

And yes, of course, Lance got a lot of pleasure out of it, he got utterly wrecked, most of the time. But that was different. Because even with Shiro, Lance was still… in that role, in a way. Because even then, when Shiro had been focusing on Lance’s pleasure, it was more in a way of “I’m going to wreck you; I’m going to make you sob”, than anything else.

So Lance was taking his pleasure from Shiro so tentatively and exploritorily, cupping the back of his head with one hand and stroking his cheek with the other as he thrust into his mouth, not roughly or deeply like Shiro knew Lance was used to taking himself, just shallowly, just enough to leave Lance breathless. 

Shiro brought one hand up to cup his balls, gently rolling them between his fingers as Lance used his mouth, lovingly stroking his hair as he did so, and moaning under his touch. 

He kept on like this for a few minutes, breathing becoming more ragged as he went, the moans that spilled from his lips becoming a little more audible and needy. 

“Shiro-” Lance moaned softly, slowing his pace reluctantly and pulling his cock from his mouth, letting the leaking tip rest on his bottom lip. “We gotta stop, I’m gonna cum.”

“Do you want to?” Shiro asked softly, voice muffled a little by the cock at his lips. 

“What?” 

“Do you want to cum?” Shiro asked, wrapping his hand around Lance’s cock and gently stroking it. “We only have to do as much as you want. But if you’d like to cum, then I’d like you to cum down my throat. Or on my face. Either’s good.”

Lance whimpered at that, cock jumping in his hand. 

“I- um-” Lance said distractedly, pushing his cock back into Shiro’s mouth with a soft groan, thrusts getting a little more forceful as he approached his orgasm, face screwed up in pleasure and lip bitten as he tried to keep himself quiet. 

It didn’t take him long, and Shiro could tell when he was about to cum by the desperate little whines and whimpers that he couldn’t keep quiet, thrusts becoming messy and uneven, fingers tightening in his hair with a soft moan of Shiro’s name.

He thrust deeper into Shiro’s mouth, albeit still tentatively, and so Shiro did the rest for him, sinking down completely onto his cock as he came, trying his hardest to keep himself relaxed as so not to gag, nose pressed against Lance’s pelvis. 

Lance gave a strangled moan, fingers curled tightly in his hair, cum pulsing down Shiro’s throat, and he roughly pulled him off of his cock at the last moment, as if suddenly remembering, so that the last few spurts of cum could land over the lower half of Shiro’s face, only a little landing in his waiting open mouth. 

Shiro moaned, eyes falling closed as the cum his his skin, and he licked his lips, opening his eyes to look up at Lance, who looked thoroughly wrecked. 

“Okay?” Shiro asked, a little breathless himself and definitely leaking in his pants. 

Lance nodded, unable to take his eyes off of him as he moved into Shiro’s lap, gently tugging Shiro’s head backwards, and pressing soft kisses over his face. He coated his lips in his own cum from Shiro’s skin, before pressing their lips together, letting Shiro lick it off of them. 

Lance gave a small moan, kissing along Shiro’s jaw and gently cleaning him up with small kitten licks where his cum still dripped on his skin, before kissing Shiro, dipping his tongue into his mouth and letting Shiro lick the cum into his own mouth. 

“Lance…” Shiro breathed in a soft moan, tilting his head as Lance kissed down his neck, teeth gently grazing his skin. 

Lance hummed softly in response as he slid his hands down shiro’s chest, curling his fingers in the hem of his shirt and lifting it up and over his head, dropping it onto the floor where his own clothes lay. 

“Tell me what you want, baby.” Lance murmured with a soft kiss to his skin as he began to unbutton his pants, carefully unzipping them and pulling his hard cock out. 

“Just like this.” Shiro said, swallowing thickly as Lance wrapped his slender fingers around his shaft. 

“Mhm?” Lance asked as he kissed up the side of his neck to his ear, gently nibbling on the lobe. “You don’t want my mouth?”

Shiro shook his head. “No, just want you close, just like this.” He said, wrapping one arm firmly around Lance’s waist as Lance began to work his hand over his cock. 

“Mm, okay baby, let me take care of you.” He said, peppering his skin with kisses as he worked him, gently squeezing around his cock and rubbing his thumb through his slit a few times, Shiro giving a soft hiss in response. 

“Lance…” Shiro moaned, tipping his head further to the side as Lance continued to kiss him, gently thrusting his hips upwards in a steady rhythm, pushing his cock into Lance’s hand as he worked it over him. 

Lance brought his other hand down to cup Shiro’s balls, gently squeezing and massaging them as he pressed tender kisses up the side of his face, before resting the side of his forehead against Shiro’s, squeezing around his cock again as Shiro whined. 

He picked up the pace a little, working his hand over his cock a little faster and more firmly, still gently playing with his balls with his other hand, and he pulled back to look at him, Shiro looking up at him and biting his lip, sure that his cheeks were flushed. 

“You’re so pretty.” Lance murmured, leaning in to kiss him before Shiro could give any sort of protest in response, whimpering into his mouth as he bucked up into his hand and Lance quickly pumped his cock, bringing him closer and closer.

Shiro knew he wasn’t going to last long, considering how much having Lance fuck his mouth had turned him on. Embarrassingly so. He couldn’t warn him, though he suspected Lance knew, swallowing each of his moans, and sliding their tongues together, bringing him closer and closer until Shiro came with an embarrassingly high pitched whine into Lance’s mouth, spilling over his hand. 

Lance worked him through it, spreading his cum down his shaft as he kept pumping it, and Shiro moaned breathlessly, bucking into his hand, before finally shying away from the touch as it became too much. 

It took Shiro a moment to regain focus, realising that he’d stopped kissing Lance, was just panting against his lips, whining as Lance pulled away from him to reach for a tissue to clean them up with, tossing it onto his bedside table and then gently cupping Shiro’s face. 

“I missed you too.” He murmured softly, kissing Shiro’s smile as it formed on his face. 

Shiro didn’t say anything in response, just held Lance close against him and then carefully slid him out of his lap and onto the bed. He took the rest of his clothes off and laid down next to Lance, reaching out to gently brush his hair out of his face. 

“So…?” Shiro murmured with a smile and Lance tilted his head.

“So?”

“How was it?” He asked and Lance breathed a small giggle, biting his lip.

“Good.” He said, gently tracing his fingertips over Shiro’s chest. “I think I prefer to be on the receiving end, though.”

“Mm, I’ll keep that in mind.” Shiro said with a soft laugh, sliding his hand over Lance’s shoulder and down his side, coming to rest in the dip of his waist. 

Lance smiled softly back, and they lay in a comfortable, warm silence for a few minutes before Lance spoke again. “Thank you.” He said softly. 

“For…?” Shiro asked. 

“A lot of things.” Lance smiled with a thoughtful hum. “Coming. Not being mad at me, and never wanting to see me again. Being you. Just… everything, I guess.”

Shiro breathed a soft laugh. “I’m not sure that you need to thank me.”

“Well, I am.” Lance said earnestly. “And I mean it.”

“Okay.” Shiro said, biting his lip. “Well, you’re welcome, then.”

Lance didn’t say anything after that, and the two of them just lay in a comfortable silence, gently tracing their fingertips over each other’s skin. 

They didn’t move until Lance’s mother called them down for dinner, and Lance frowned, giving a soft sigh and sitting up, stretching. 

Shiro sat up too, pressing a soft kiss to Lance’s shoulder blade, and Lance melted back against him, turning his face to press into the crook of his neck. 

“What changed?” Shiro murmured and Lance didn’t say anything for a moment.

“I’m not scared anymore.” He said, pulling back to look at him. “I mean, I’m pretty fucking terrified, actually. But… not of you. You make me feel… safer than anyone. So I’m… I’m still scared of getting hurt, but what changed is that I realised that you’re worth that risk.”

Shiro cupped his face and brought him in for a gentle kiss, and Lance rested their foreheads together as they pulled apart. 

“I’m sorry it took me so long.”

“It’s okay.” Shiro said, kissing him again. 

Lance looped his arms around his neck and kissed him back, before finally managing to drag himself away as his mother called for them again. 

Lance grumbled, getting up and pulling his clothes on, Shiro watching amusedly as he did the same. 

“Aren’t you hungry?” Shiro asked, slipping an arm around Lance’s waist and kissing his head as they finished dressing.

“Well, yeah, but…” Lance mumbled, cheeks flushing.

“Yeah, but what?”

“I missed you.” He grumbled, turning to hide his face against Shiro with a small embarrassed whine.

Shiro laughed softly and wrapped his other arm around him. “We can cuddle all night, I promise.”

Lance looked up at him and Shiro pecked his lips. 

“Come on, before she calls again.” He said, slipping their hands together and Lance sighed and nodded, leading him out of the room and downstairs. 

Lance didn’t drop their hands as they went into the dining room where Rosa and Veronica were setting the table. 

“Where’s Luis?” Lance asked, glancing around the room. 

“Ah, Lance, would you go and get them in from outside, for me?” His mother asked, laying the table for far more than just the three of them, and Shiro suddenly felt rather intimidated.

Lance nodded, pulling Shiro along with him as he brought him outside, opening the backdoor and standing there with a fond smile on his face for a few moments.

“Hey!” Lance called and a man, who Shiro presumed to be Luis, turned around to look at him, wiping an arm across his face. “Dinner’s ready.” 

Luis walked over to him, two younger children that Shiro recognised vaguely from the hospital rushing after him. 

“You gonna introduce me to your boyfriend?” He asked amusedly, raising an eyebrow.

Lance flushed deeply and spluttered. “He’s not my-” He said, before following Luis’ gaze down to where their fingers were interlocked and sighed. “Luis, Shiro. Shiro- Luis, Nadia, and Sylvio.” He said with a small pout. 

“It’s nice to meet you.” Shiro said, holding out his hand and Luis eyed it for a few moments, before shaking it. 

“That’s impressive.” He said, still looking at his arm. 

Shiro laughed and shrugged. “Uh, yeah. It has its perks.”

Lance gave him a side glance and he could practically see the cogs turning in his head. He raised his eyebrow and Lance’s lip curled, before shaking his head. 

“Are you an alien?” Sylvio asked, poking his head out from behind Luis’ legs and Shiro smiled. 

“No, I’m afraid not.” He said, shaking his head. “My arm is, though. It was made by Princess Allura for me after I lost my previous one.”

He looked at it in wonder. “Why does it look like that?”

Shiro looked at his arm doubtfully. “Well… I’m not too sure, really. It was the Princesses design choice. Can be useful though, if I don’t want to get up and I need to get something.”

“Can I touch it?” Nadia asked shyly.

“Nadia.” Luis reprimanded softly and she looked sheepish.

“Um… can I touch it, _please_?” 

“Better.” 

“You can.” Shiro said with a laugh, crouching down to her height so that she could touch it. 

She tentatively reached out to touch it, giggling softly as Shiro curled his fingers into a fist and uncurled them. 

“It’s really cool.” She said. 

“Thank you.” Shiro replied. 

“Are you Uncle Lance’s boyfriend?” She whispered, leaning close to his ear.

Shiro laughed and shook his head. “I’d love nothing more.” He said with a soft smile. “But not quite yet.”

She nodded solemnly as though she’d been given a great secret and took a step back and Shiro took that as his cue to stand up.

Lance gave him a soft smile and laced their fingers together again, leading them all back into the house, the twins quickly getting into their chairs, before Rosa scolded them and told them to go and wash their hands if they’d been playing outside. 

“And you? Are your hands clean?” She asked, turning on Lance and Shiro with a raised eyebrow. 

Lance quickly held his hand up for inspection, and Shiro quickly did the same, before dropping his right as she inspected, before gesturing for them to sit down. 

The two of them slipped into their seats and Lance slid his hand to rest on Shiro’s thigh, and Shiro felt his heart rate spike for a moment before relaxing; it seemed innocent enough. He doubted that was something that Lance would try in front of his family, anyway. 

It didn’t take long for everyone to be seated, and Shiro was grateful that there weren’t any more family members joining them, though he knew they… well, existed. But for all the interactions that he’d had to do, Lance’s family was… something else. Lance’s family was important. 

The first few minutes of eating were silent as everyone dug into their food, before a light conversations started to arise. 

Shiro mostly just observed, listening and nodding along until talk of the Atlas came up, Veronica helpfully chipping in and supplying the answers. 

“We’re gonna miss Lance, alright.” She said, shaking her head and Lance looked up, tilting his head. 

“You… are?”

“Oh, for sure.” She said, suppressing a laugh. “After the lipstick incident? Oh boy, the crew are gonna miss you.”

“The lipstick incident?” Rosa asked, raising an interested brow and Lance’s eyes widened as his cheeks turned pink. 

“Uhh, it was nothing, mama.” He said quickly.

“Nothing? It was iconic.” Veronica said, clearly relishing in his embarrassment. 

“Well now you _have_ to share.” Luis said expectantly. 

“So-” Veronica said loudly over Lance’s indignant spluttering and he and Lance shared a mutually red faced look between them. “It’s a normal day at work, dear Captain over here is on his break.” She said, gesturing to Shiro as if they wouldn’t know who he was. 

Shiro felt his face darken and he tried to sink down in his chair. 

“He leaves, and we don’t really know where he’s gone, but it’s not that big of a deal. Until he comes back about ten or so minutes later, absolutely smothered in lipstick. Now, I’m talking like, entire lower half of his face, his neck, his shirt. _Everywhere_.” She said, wildly gesticulating as she went to really embellish it. “And poor guy, he has _no idea_.”

Luis snorted, covering his mouth with his hand and Rosa glanced to Lance and then to Shiro, and back to Veronica. 

“So we’re all like, “uh, Captain, you okay?” and he’s all like- “what?” and then a minute later Lance here saunters in, the biggest grin on his face, lips bright red, and it’s all smeared down his face from where he’s left it all over Shiro.”

Shiro glanced to Lance, who had sunk down in his chair as far as physically possible, face bright red.

“And he just leans in real close and says “I think you’ve got a little something there, Captain.” And you know, the rest I really can’t repeat in present company.” She said with a satisfied smirk, resting her chin in the palm of her hand, giving Shiro a cat like grin. 

Luis had dissolved into laughter about half way through and Rosa’s lips were curled in a way that said she found it very amusing, but didn’t really want to. 

“Lance.” She said, giving him a look. “I hope you weren’t too distracting for poor Shiro. He is the captain, after all.”

Lance squeaked and shook his head and Shiro huffed a small laugh before he could stop himself. Lance had been distracting him for far longer than he’d been on the Atlas for. Far longer than they’d been hooking up for, even. 

“No, mama.” Lance said sheepishly, before sticking his tongue out at Veronica when she looked away. 

Rosa tactfully changed the topic after that, and Nadia enthusiastically took over a few minutes later about something from school, and Shiro didn’t want to admit how weak it was making him feel at just seeing Lance interacting with them. With all of his family, really. It was… a reminder, somehow, of how homesick he’d been during their Voltron days. But that he was back with them now, and everything was okay. 

They helped to clear up, and said goodnight to the twins as Luis took them upstairs to get ready for bed. 

It wasn’t that late, but Shiro was… pretty much exhausted. This time yesterday he was still… well, he was still feeling really shitty and he hadn’t heard from Lance, and he didn’t know what he was going to do. 

And here he was today, with Lance’s fingers wrapped around his wrist again, and they’d talked, for the first time, well, ever. They’d actually talked things through and maybe they weren’t done yet, maybe they weren’t fully resolved or sorted through, but it was a start. 

And Lance loved him back. He hadn’t explicitly said so, but Shiro knew that he did. 

They hung around a little, before Lance gave a very exaggerated yawn, bidding his mother goodnight and leading Shiro back up to his room. 

Lance’s room looked just as nice in the dark, and Shiro wasn’t quite sure what it was about it… but it was somehow the most restful and safe place he’d been in for a very long time. No wonder somewhere like that belonged to Lance. 

Lance sighed as he closed the door, running his hands through his hair and then quickly pulling off his clothes, looking expectantly at Shiro and putting a hand on his hip. 

“I didn’t realise we were stripping.” Shiro said amusedly and Lance rolled his eyes, reaching out to pull Shiro’s shirt over his head. 

“Well, we are.” Lance said, going for his pants next. “Do I have to do everything myself?”

“I kind of prefer it when you’re undressing me.” Shiro said with an amused smile as Lance pulled them down his legs and Lance huffed, giving him a look, though the corners of his lips were upturned. 

“Shut up and get on the bed.” Lance said, putting his hands on his hips.

“Bossy.” Shiro said, tutting, but doing as he was told.

“You like it when I’m bossy.” Lance countered and Shiro couldn’t argue with that. 

“Oh I do, do I?” He asked instead, raising an eyebrow as Lance walked over to the bed, getting on top of both it and him, straddling his lap and leaning over him, ghosting his lips over Shiro’s. 

“You do.” Lance said, gently biting at his bottom lip. “You like it when I’m in charge, and you like it when I’m on top, and you like knowing that I can take you completely to pieces.”

Shiro swallowed, letting out a soft breath. Fuck. 

“See?” Lance said with a smirk, brushing Shiro’s hair from his face. “You’re so easy, Shiro.” God, and he was. 

“Lance…” Shiro breathed, hands coming to settle on Lance’s hips, breath hitching as Lance brushed his lips over his jaw.

“I have a question.” Lance murmured, letting his teeth graze over his skin. 

“Mm?” Shiro asked distractedly, tilting his head a little for him. 

“Would you let me fuck you?” He asked, pulling up a little to look at him, brows furrowed a little in apprehension. 

“I thought you didn’t like topping.” Shiro said, tilting his head. 

“I don’t.” Lance said. “That wasn’t an answer.”

Shiro laughed softly. “The answer is always yes, my love. Why do you want to if you won’t like it?”

“I never said I wouldn’t like it.” Lance said with a small pout. “I’d like it because it’s you, and I really, _really_ want to.”

“Then you can.” Shiro said, biting his lip with a smile. “Why the sudden want to?” He asked with a soft hum as Lance leant back in to press a gentle kiss to his lips.

“I just…” He said with a small sigh. “I feel like… I didn’t appreciate you enough when I had you. I thought I did, but… I didn’t. And then I didn’t have you and I could have never had you again and I just want to kiss every inch of you and touch you all over, and just make you feel so good. I just wanna take you apart, make you lose it, but in the _best_ way. I want to do to you what you do to me.”

Shiro smiled softly, gently cupping Lance’s cheek and kissing him. “You’re sweet.” He said against his lips.

Lance gave a small shrug, gently nibbling on his bottom lip. “So can I?”

“I already said yes.” 

“Yeah, but like now.” Lance said, brushing their noses together. 

“Now?” Shiro asked with a small laugh. 

“Are you tired?”

“I’m never too tired for you.” 

“Can I um…”

“Hm?” Shiro asked, kissing the corner of Lance’s lips.

“Can I eat you out?” He asked and Shiro’s breath caught in his throat. 

“Uh- you- yes. If you want.” He said, stumbling over his words. 

“I’ve never actually done that before.” He said, biting his lip.

“Two firsts in one day? Lucky me.” Shiro laughed. 

Lance rolled his eyes with an amused huff. “Yes, yes, so surprising.”

“I mean, it is.” 

“You don’t need to keep reminding me that I’m a slut.” Lance said with a very fake pout and Shiro kissed it right off of his face.

“Oh but baby, you _love_ it.” He murmured. 

“Maybe.” Lance countered with a soft hum. 

“Definitely.” Shiro agreed and Lance breathed a soft laugh, shaking his head. 

“So um, I know you said before that it had been a while, so…”

Shiro bit his lip, cheeks colouring a little. “Yeah, about that.” He said, and Lance tilted his head. “It hasn’t maybe been as long as it should have been.”

“What does that mean?” Lance laughed.

“It means I slept with someone last week.” 

“Oh.” Lance said. “Okay. And you-?”

“Yeah. I figured I couldn’t exactly compare it to you if it was like that.”

Lance’s brows furrowed and he bit his lip. “I’m sorry.” He said softly. “Was it good, at least?” He asked with a small smile.

Shiro laughed. “I mean, I was _very_ drunk, but yes.”

“So, now I _have_ to be good.” Lance pouted.

“I think you’ll find there’s a slight difference.” Shiro said with an amused smile, stroking his thumb over Lance’s cheek. 

“And what’s that?” He pouted.

“I’d never met him before, and you just so happen to be everything to me.”

Lance rested his forehead against Shiro’s with a soft sigh. “I just want it to be good for you.”

“Lance.” Shiro said softly. “It will be. You don’t need to… pressure yourself so much, okay? I mean, how do you think I feel sometimes?”

“What d’you mean?”

“I mean, I’ve seen you take cocks that are at least three times the size of mine, and I’ve seen you a complete and utter wreck because of it. So yeah, sometimes I get a little insecure, too.”

“Oh.” Lance said softly. “I hadn’t thought about it like that.”

“You… hadn’t?”

“Of course not, you’re- _you_ , you’re- oh.” He said with a soft laugh. “I guess, i get what you mean, now.”

“Mm, so you could probably start by kissing me.” He said, directing Lance’s lips to his own and Lance easily complied, kissing him softly to begin with, before pressing a little more firmly against his lips, with a little more intent. 

Shiro gasped as Lance nipped at his lip, and Lance slipped his tongue into his mouth, gently rocking their hips together as he kissed him, licking into his mouth and swallowing each of Shiro’s little breathy noises. 

“Did you lock the door?” Shiro asked as Lance moved to press wet open-mouthed kisses down his neck and Lance made a noise against him, shaking his head. “You should probably-” He said, breaking off with a moan as Lance bit down into the curve of his neck, sucking at his skin. 

Lance didn’t reply, choosing to work a mark into his skin instead, still grinding their hips together and Shiro was already breathless beneath him, fingertips tracing over his back. 

“Lance-” Shiro moaned softly, and Lance gave in, getting up off of the bed and going to slide the lock across the door, Shiro suddenly very grateful for the moonlight and the fact that they hadn’t closed the curtains yet as he watched Lance come back over to the bed. 

“Can you get on your knees, baby?” Lance asked, and Shiro nodded, doing as he was asked and getting onto his knees, fighting the urge to lean down on his forearms and bury his face in them, knowing that that would only expose him further. “Are you embarrassed?” Lance asked with an amused smile, tilting his head. 

“No.” Shiro lied, feeling his cheeks burn as Lance traced his fingers over his back and the curve of his ass. 

“You are.”

“The last time I did this I was very drunk.” Shiro reminded him and Lance pressed a kiss to the small of his back and Shiro felt his heart jump. 

“Mmhm.” Lance agreed, using both of his hands to cup Shiro’s ass. “God, Shiro, you have such a nice ass.”

“You… think?” Shiro asked, biting his lip. 

“Absolutely.” Lance said, giving it a soft squeeze and Shiro huffed out a breath, not wanting to admit how much this was already affecting him. How much this was affecting him just knowing that this was _Lance_.

Shiro listened as Lance went to his drawer, opening it to get the lube out. 

“You want to use a condom?” Lance asked. “It’ll be less messy to clean up.”

Shiro thought for a moment and shook his head.

“Are you sure?” Lance asked, a teasing lilt to his voice as he closed the drawer and got back on the bed. 

Shiro nodded. “Mm.”

“Are you nervous?” Lance asked softly, putting the lube down on the bed beside them and gently gripping Shiro’s hips.

“Maybe a little.” Shiro admitted, though he wasn’t entirely sure why. He’d been fine last time he’d- but this was Lance. And somehow that made it a much bigger deal. 

“It’s okay, I am too.” Lance said, running his hands down Shiro’s thighs. 

Shiro’s breath caught at the motion, and Lance slid a hand around to gently wrap around his cock. 

“You’re rather excited for someone whose so nervous.” Lance teased softly as he slowly began to pump his cock. 

Shiro shuddered, a small moan escaping him. “M-maybe a little.” He echoed and Lance breathed a small laugh. 

“Let me take care of you, sweetheart.” Lance murmured, and Shiro heard shuffling behind him, gasping and letting his eyes flutter closed as Lance’s warm mouth closed around one of his balls. 

“Lance…” He breathed and Lance hummed softly in response, sucking and gently stroking over his inner thigh. 

Lance kept stroking his cock with his other hand, Shiro already panting beneath him as he sucked, before releasing the skin with a wet pop and moving to take the other into his mouth. 

Shiro whimpered as Lance slid his thumb through his slit, before moving off of his balls to pepper wet kisses over the insides of his thighs. 

Shiro whined as Lance gently bit down into the flesh of his thigh, catching the skin between his teeth and sucking, before moving a little higher to another spot and doing the same. 

Lance spent a good few minutes gently nipping and biting at his thighs, pressing soft kisses over the skin after, slowly moving higher and higher at a teasing pace, and Shiro thought he might just die of anticipation before Lance got there. 

Lance was probably taking his time to work himself up to it, as much as Shiro, because he’d never done this before, and god, it had been so long for Shiro that he could hardly remember what it felt like. 

His body felt like it was on fire, though, as Lance teased him, hand on his cock steadily working over it as he sucked at his thighs, Shiro distractedly wondering if he’d have hickeys on them and deciding that he really, really hoped that he would. 

Finally, Lance began to nip at the flesh of his ass, and Shiro made a soft whining noise, quickly turning into a drawn out whimper as he felt the press of Lance’s thumb experimentally at his entrance and he was very suddenly reminded of the fact that he’d been drunk last time. 

This was… nerve wracking, to say the least, but god, if he didn’t want it… He wanted Lance all over him, wanted Lance’s hands and his mouth everywhere until he was sobbing. That… wasn’t something he’d thought before. Normally, he wanted to make Lance come apart but god, he just… he wanted Lance to take him apart, and they both knew that he could very, _very_ easily. 

“Shh, baby.” Lance soothed softly as he pressed a little more firmly at his entrance with his thumb, Shiro’s cock jumping in Lance’s hand with anticipation. “Let me…” He said and Shiro made some sort of noise that he really hoped was one of encouragement. 

At first it was just a kiss, a feather light brush of Lance’s lips over his hole, and Shiro didn’t know how much more of this teasing he could take. He knew it wasn’t meant to be teasing, that they were just taking it slow, but all the same…

Then it was a tentative swipe of his tongue and Shiro’s soft moan caught in his throat. A few kitten licks, still small and tentative and exploratory, and Shiro could tell the exact moment that Lance gained in confidence, starting to properly eat him out because it was the exact moment that Shiro gave in and moved down to rest on his forearms, burying his burning face in them. 

He could tell that Lance was trying to replicate movements that Shiro performed on him and fuck, if it wasn’t working. Shiro couldn’t tell whether it was just because it had been _that_ long, or if Lance had just really been paying attention because he’d pressed his lips firmly against his arm to try and stop any noise from escaping him. 

Lance picked up the pace a little on his cock as he ate him out, pumping his shaft a little faster as he pressed his tongue into him, sucking on his rim and licking into him and it was taking Shiro’s every effort not to rock back against his face. 

“Lance…” He moaned brokenly, panting against his arm, feeling a bead of precum form at the tip of his cock, which Lance quickly spread down his shaft as he worked him. 

Lance hummed softly in acknowledgement, teeth catching on his rim as he gently nibbled at it and Shiro groaned, cock twitching in Lance’s hand, hips stuttering a little and Lance smoothed his freehand soothingly down Shiro’s thigh. 

It was embarrassing, really, how quickly and how far Lance had been able to work him up like this, especially as it was something that he’d never done before, but he’d known the moment that Lance had really got going that he wasn’t going to last long. How in hell was he supposed to when Lance was eating him out like that? Like there was nothing more that he’d ever wanted to do, and like he wanted to do it forever?

“Lance, Lance, I- you gotta-” He babbled, pressing his forehead into Lance’s pillow, completely overwhelmed by the scent of him, each press of his tongue into him making him shudder, precum steadily beading at the tip of his cock as Lance quickly jerked him off. 

“Can you cum like this?” Lance asked breathlessly as he pulled away. Shiro made a distracted noise- wasn’t that what he was trying to tell him? “I mean… do you _want_ to? It might be a bit much.”

“I- I don’t-” Shiro whined, Lance having not stopped working his cock and he was finding it very difficult to think right now. “Please… Please, I want you to fuck me…”

Lance made a small whining noise at that. “Can I make you cum on my tongue first?” 

“Yes- yes, Lance, _please_.” He begged, giving a relieved breathless moan as Lance delved back in, sucking at his rim for a few moments before pushing his tongue right back into him, fucking him with it and squeezing his hand around his cock as he jerked him off. 

Embarrassingly, it only took him a few moments after that, thighs shaking as he came, Lance working his cock through it and licking into him as he clenched around his tongue, before finally pulling back, breathless, and resting his forehead against Shiro’s upper thigh.

“Okay?” Lance asked softly, and Shiro nodded. “Was that um… okay?” He asked a few moments later.

Shiro gave a breathless laugh, flopping down and turning over onto his side. “Lance, that was really, really good.” He said, reaching down to thread his fingers through Lance’s hair. 

Lance smiled and bit his lip. “Are you still… good?” 

Shiro nodded. “Yeah, I’m good.”

“Okay.” Lance said, and Shiro could sense his nerves. “How d’you want to… lie?”

Shiro hummed thoughtfully, turning onto his back and parting his thighs for Lance. “Like this?”

Lance nodded, looking a little relieved. “Okay, yeah that’s- good.”

“Baby.” Shiro said softly. “We don’t have to do this, you know.” 

“What? No, I want to.” Lance said quickly, brows furrowing. “Do you still… want to?”

Shiro smiled softly at him. “As long as you’re really sure, then yes.”

“I’m just nervous.” Lance said, pouting. “Promise. I really want to.”

“Okay.” Shiro smiled, reaching out to cup Lance’s cheek. 

Lance leaned into his touch, before moving, positioning himself between Shiro’s legs. 

“You’re so pretty.” He murmured, smoothing his hands over Shiro’s thighs and Shiro felt himself flush. 

“I’m a lot of things, but…”

“Pretty is very high on that list.” Lance said, cutting him off and Shiro didn’t argue back, biting his lip. “I promise.” He said, and Shiro believed him. 

“Okay.” Lance said, blowing out a breath and picking up the lube. “I’ve never done this to someone else before.” He said as he coated his fingers. 

“It’s okay, you’ll do great.” Shiro reassured him and Lance nodded, bringing his fingers to Shiro’s entrance and rubbing teasingly at it for a few moments. 

“Help me out, okay?” Lance said, giving him a quick smile before gently easing one into him, Shiro already a little looser because of Lance’s tongue. 

Shiro’s lips parted as he huffed out a soft breath, Lance pushing his finger in the rest of the way. 

“Feel okay?” Lance murmured and Shiro nodded.

“Yes.” Shiro confirmed, resisting the urge to tell Lance that he wasn’t delicate; Lance needed to go slow just as much as Shiro did, if not more. 

Lance carefully pulled it out, pushing it back in and shallowly thrusting it inside of him. He continued like this for a little while, before nudging the tip of a second finger at his entrance, and slowly slipping it in next to the first. 

Shiro let out another shaky breath at that, biting down on his lip, watching as Lance looked at him attentively. 

“Still okay?” He asked and Shiro nodded again. 

“I promise I’ll tell you if it’s not, baby.” Shiro said and Lance looked down with a small smile, nodding, as if internally chastising himself. 

“Okay, yeah.” He agreed, gently thrusting his fingers inside of Shiro, carefully stretching him out before curling his fingers inside of him, brows furrowing in frustration as he felt for his prostate. 

Shiro would have loved to see the triumphant look on Lance’s face when he found it, he really would have, but unfortunately, he didn’t have that luxury, as he was too busy gasping out a small moan, eyes fluttering closed. 

“There?” Lance asked, as if a confirmation was necessary and Shiro quickly nodded.

“Yes.” Shiro agreed, whimpering as Lance rubbed his fingers over it. “Yes, yes, yes…”

Shiro met his eyes, surprised not to be met with the satisfied smirk he was expecting; Lance was just looking at him in a sort of wonderment, instead. 

“Lance…” Shiro moaned as Lance kept up the movements, before finally moving his fingers away and going back to stretching him, spreading his fingers inside of him and carefully working him open. 

He added a third finger not too long after that, curling his fingers with each thrust of them, sending little jolts through Shiro’s cock, which had hardened again, curved against his stomach. 

“Please, baby…” Shiro whined, rocking his hips a little, cheeks flushed and breathless. “Please, I want you…”

Lance swallowed, wetting his lip as he watched him, thrusting his fingers into him a few more times, hooking them into his prostate, before carefully pulling them out. 

“Last chance for a condom.” Lance said with a smile as he took his own cock in hand, and the broken whimper he gave told Shiro how much it must have been aching for some attention.

“Baby, please, I want all of you; your cock, your cum- baby, please…” 

“Fuck…” Lance said through a soft moan, slicking his cock with lube and leaning over Shiro, hooking one of his thighs over his hip and positioning his cock at Shiro’s entrance. 

They moaned together as Lance began to push into him, Lance propping himself up on the bed, leaning over Shiro, and mouthing at his jaw, Shiro’s cock caught between their abdomens. 

“Lance…” Shiro moaned as Lance rocked slowly into him, tipping his head away as Lance went to kiss him. “I’d rather you didn’t.” He said through a moan with a smile and Lance gave a breathless laugh.

“I have definitely kissed you after you’ve eaten my ass- with tongue.” He said, gently tipping Shiro’s chin back towards him and Shiro couldn’t find it in himself to resist as Lance pressed their lips together. 

Lance groaned softly as he bottomed out, Shiro taking the opportunity to slip his tongue into his mouth, all previous concerns having flown out the window at the feel of Lance completely inside of him like this.

Lance slowly began to move his hips, and Shiro breathed a soft moan, sliding his arms around Lance's neck, kissing him again and again gasping into his mouth as Lance began to push his cock back into him. 

"See- I was right." Lance moaned against his lips. 

"About?" Shiro asked, head too clouded to think about what Lance was talking about. 

"That I would like it." He said and Shiro gave a small breathy chuckle. 

"Yeah? You like it?" 

"Y-Yeah..." Lance said through a soft groan. "So good, baby. You feel so good."

Shiro moaned, arching against Lance, sliding his hands over his shoulders and coming to rest on his back, fingertips pressing into his skin. 

Lance picked up the pace a little at that, rocking his cock into him a little faster, moaning against him and Shiro moaned into his mouth, kissing him again and whining as Lance sucked on his bottom lip. 

Lance pulled back a little after that, steadily rocking his hips and looking down at him with a breathless smile. “God, you’re so fucking gorgeous, Shiro.” He murmured, and Shiro felt his cheeks burn. 

It wasn’t just the words he said, no, it was the way he was looking at him; like he was marvelling at him, like he was the prettiest thing he’d ever seen and Shiro _knew_ that wasn’t true. 

“Lance…” He moaned, biting his lip, gasping as Lance snapped his hips and Lance looked down at him with a small smile. 

“You sound so pretty, you’re so pretty, baby, you’re-” He said, moving to rest their foreheads together. 

Shiro whimpered, rocking his hips back against Lance, catching his cock between their abdomens and giving a whine. 

“You’re so good, you’re so good, you’re so good-” Lance moaned mindlessly, fucking into him a little harder, peppering messy kisses over the side of his face. “I’m not- I’m not gonna last.”

“Then don’t.” Shiro murmured with a moan, clutching tightly at Lance’s shoulders. “Please don’t, I want you to cum in me, baby, wanna feel you cum.”

“Fuck…” Lance groaned brokenly, shifting his hips a little and fucking into him deeply. 

Shiro arched against him, a breathless gasp being punched out of him as Lance’s cock hit against his prostate. 

“O-oh fuck, Lance- Lance- Lance-” He gasped. 

Lance gave a low whine, thrusting quickly into him and making an effort to try and replicate the movement, giving a soft sigh of relief when Shiro gasped out again and clenched around him. 

“You’re being too noisy.” Lance murmured at Shiro’s breathless whines and moans as Lance fucked into his prostate, and Shiro whimpered, desperately trying to keep himself quiet. 

Lance managed to bring one of his hands up to wrap over Shiro’s mouth, picking up the pace as he did so and fucking into him faster, and Shiro could only hope that the sound of their skin slapping together wasn’t as distinctive outside the walls of Lance’s room. 

“Touch yourself, for me.” Lance instructed softly, and Shiro pried one of his hands away from where he was still clutching at Lance, sliding it between them to wrap around his throbbing cock, and giving a broken moan against the palm of Lance’s hand.

He quickly started jerking himself off, restraining himself less and less as Lance’s hand muffled him, canting his hips, pushing his cock into his hand and rocking against Lance’s where it thrust into him. 

“Baby- baby, I’m- I’m gonna cum-” Lance warned, and Shiro moaned in response, working his hand on his cock quickly, and knowing that he was much the same. 

Lance’s hips stuttered as he came, thrusting erratically into him as he spilled inside of him, the feeling of Lance’s cum spilling into him all it took to send Shiro over the edge, clenching around Lance’s cock, milking him of his cum as he spilled over his own chest and hand.

They both lay there panting together for what felt like the longest time as they came down from it, before Lance finally pulled his cock out and collapsed on the bed next to him. 

Shiro blew out a long shaky breath, turning over onto his side to look at Lance with a lazy smile.

“Hey.” He said and Lance gave a contented him in response, lifting his hand to gently trace his fingers over Shiro’s cheek. 

“Hey.” He murmured back. 

“How was that?” Shiro asked with a small grin.

Lance gave a little snort. “I think you already know. But it was really good. Like, really really good.”

“I’m glad.” Shiro smiled, putting his arm around Lance’s waist and pulling him closer. 

Lance smiled, kissing his nose and snuggling against him. 

“I remember when you told me you didn’t ‘do’ cuddling.” He said, a teasing lilt to his voice and Lance rolled his eyes. 

“Mmmhm. I also remember telling you that I don’t mess around with people I know.”

“Lucky we’re not messing around then, huh?” Shiro said and Lance gave him a soft look. 

“Yeah.” He agreed. “Lucky we’re not messing around.” 

“I’m sure there’s no way someone didn’t hear that.” Shiro said after a few moments, blowing out a breath. 

“You were being too loud.” Lance pouted and Shiro made a noise of indignance. 

“Not because of me! Because of the bed creaking, and stuff.”

“Eh.” Lance said with a shrug. “I mean they all know we’re fucking, why wouldn’t we be now?”

Shiro flushed and rolled his eyes. “Because it’s your _family house_ , and it’s different.”

“Is it?” Lance asked, tilting his head. 

“Yes.” Shiro said, nodding. “I mean, you know I’m not exactly _shy_ about fucking you, but it’s like… I don’t know. It’s probably stupid.”

“It’s not stupid.” Lance said softly, cupping his cheek. “It’s sweet. But also, two of my siblings are married, and Luis has kids, so… sex is a thing that happens. And they’ve _definitely_ had sex in this house before.”

“Have you?” Shiro asked with a small grin.

“I mean, I have _now_.”

Shiro gave a small laugh, shaking his head and Lance grinned back. 

“We should um, go and shower or something, you’re gonna be uncomfy if we leave it much longer.”

“Oh.” Shiro said, brows furrowing. “Yeah, you’re right.” He said, not making to move. 

“Come on then.” Lance said with a small laugh. 

“Mmm, ‘m comfy.” Shiro said with a yawn. 

“Shirooooo…” Lance giggled, climbing over him to get out of bed and standing with his hands on his hips. 

“Hot.” Shiro said with a grin as he looked at him and Lance rolled his eyes. 

“Come on, come on, come on.” He said, holding out his hand and Shiro whined, but took it, letting Lance help him up. 

As soon as Shiro was standing, Lance slid his arms around his waist and looked up at him. Shiro smiled softly, leaning in to give him a tender kiss. 

Lance smiled back, and laced their hands together, looking at his door for a few moments, before going to it and unlocking it. 

Shiro watched in confusion as Lance opened the door, and poked his head out. Apparently he must have deemed the coast as clear, because he was suddenly pulling Shiro out of the bedroom and into the hall- still completely naked- and darting into the bathroom, closing the door behind them. 

“Lance!” Shiro hissed as Lance giggled. 

“What? No one was there.” He defended, and Shiro folded his arms over his chest. 

“Someone could have come out! That would have been a great first impression, I’m sure.” He said, trying to sound accusatory, but ended up just giggling along with him. 

Lance rolled his eyes, grinning at him. “We probably shouldn’t put the shower on, because we might wake someone up, but… we can still run the water in the bath.”

Shiro nodded, watching as Lance turned the taps on. 

“Can I um…?” Lance asked, trailing off and furrowing his brows. “Will you let me-?”

“Hm?” 

“Will you let me clean you up?” He asked, like he was afraid that Shiro would say no. 

“If you want to.” Shiro said and Lance bit his lip with a small nod. “Then okay, yeah.”

Lance nodded and the two of them got into the bath, not quite sitting down, more kneeling up, and Lance set about cleaning him up. 

Shiro was vaguely reminded that Lance had never used to let him, until one day he had, and he gave a small smile to himself. Maybe that was when things changed, he wasn’t sure. 

When they were done, they dried off and went back into Lance’s room (though, with towels wrapped around their waists, at least), and fell back into bed together. 

Shiro rolled onto his back and lifted an arm for Lance to crawl under, and he did, snuggling against Shiro and giving a soft contented sigh. 

Shiro looked down at him with a small smile, and leant down to press a kiss to his hair. Things were going to be okay.

 

***

 

Morning was slow in a way that it hadn’t been for a what felt like a very long time. Shiro woke up first, morning sunlight streaming through Lance’s window, lighting the room in a soft golden glow. 

Lance was still asleep, head resting on Shiro’s chest and arm slung across his waist, chest rising and falling with each slow breath. 

It was insane, really, how quickly things had changed. He knew they weren’t finished talking, yet, but things were… really good. Things were really good, and Shiro felt happy again. 

It felt like a weight had been lifted, really, because even back on the Atlas, he’d still had the lingering knowledge that it was going to end, that having Lance was only temporary. But now… things didn’t seem so bleak. 

They hadn’t officiated anything, yet, hadn’t had the boyfriend discussion, but Shiro was sure that they would in time to come. There was no rush, because Lance knew how he felt, and he reciprocated his feelings. 

Shiro couldn’t stop the small smile on his face as he looked down at Lance, pressing a soft kiss to his hair, ends having curled a little from sleep in the most endearing way, and it was tiny details like that that Shiro could appreciate now. Know that he was going to be the only one to get to see Lance like this. That it wasn’t temporary, and that Lance wasn’t going to up and leave him, because being apart had hurt Lance just as much (if not more, with the knowledge that it was his fault).

He laid very still for quite a while, holding Lance against him and waiting for him to wake. Slowly he heard the others in the house wake up, showers start running and muffled voices in the hall and down the stairs. 

Shiro just wanted to stay like that forever. In Lance’s room, with Lance wrapped up in his arms, and the McClains downstairs getting ready for the day. 

It seemed like an age before Lance finally stirred, but Shiro didn’t mind, contented with holding him for as long as he needed to sleep for. 

He gave a small sleepy whine, turning his head a little to nuzzle against Shiro’s chest. 

“Morning.” Shiro said, voice quiet and rough from sleep and Lance made another small noise, brows furrowing. “Did you have sweet dreams?” Shiro continued with an affectionate smile on his face. 

Lance gave a small sigh and nuzzled him again, as if determined to stay asleep for a little bit longer. He finally gave in, however, looking up at Shiro, eyes still half closed with sleep and a small lopsided smile on his face. 

Shiro smiled down at him, gently cupping the back of his head and stroking his hair, watching helplessly as Lance’s smile quickly turned into a frown as his eyes watered. 

“Lance?” He asked softly as Lance quickly tried to blink the tears away, burying his face in the crook of Shiro’s neck. “Sweetheart, what just happened?”

Lance shook his head, pressing himself against him and Shiro held him tighter. “I just… I really missed you.” He mumbled and Shiro felt himself melt, holding Lance as close to him as he could.

“I know, angel. But I’m here now, aren’t I? And I’ve got you.”

Lance nodded against him, pressing a small kiss to his neck. “Don’t let me go.” 

“I never will.”

“Ever?” Lance asked with a small sniff, pulling back to look at him. 

“Ever.” Shiro promised, brushing a tear from the corner of his eye and cupping his face. “Not ever, not on your life.”

Lance gave him a small smile, turning his head to press a kiss to Shiro’s palm. “I don’t deserve this. I don’t deserve you.”

“Lance…” Shiro said softly with a smile. “You made one mistake. You also have done countless other things, like, you know, saving the universe. I think you deserve to be happy.”

“I am.” He said softly with another sniff. “I’m so happy when I’m with you. I was an idiot.”

“You were scared.”

“A scared idiot.” Lance said with a small smile and Shiro gave him one back. 

“A scared idiot that deserves to be happy.” Shiro said and Lance breathed a small laugh, nodding. 

“Okay.” He compromised. “Okay, I think I can live with that.”

“Except you’re not an idiot.” Shiro said, quickly leaning up to cut any arguments he may have off with a kiss. 

“I-” Lance said, breaking away to say something but Shiro quickly pulled him back in, pressing their lips together again. 

“I won’t hear another word about it.” He murmured against his lips, gently biting down on Lance’s lower lip, and listening to the sharp intake of breath he gave.

“Mm, okay.” Lance agreed, kissing him back, shifting on the bed until he was in his lap, leaning over him to kiss him and running his hands through his hair. 

“Okay?” Shiro asked, sliding his hands up Lance’s sides. 

“Mmmhm.” Lance hummed, nipping at his bottom lip.

“We should- go downstairs.” Shiro said between kisses, Lance unhappily whining against his lips and biting down a little harder in retaliation. 

“Why?” Lance asked. 

“Because everyone else is up, and people might start to get ideas….” He said with a teasing smile. 

Lance smirked back at him. “Well, isn’t it only right that those ideas are true, then?” 

Shiro laughed softly and rolled his eyes. “Is there ever a time you’re _not_ horny?”

Lance giggled and bit his lip. “Why do you think I decided to become a pornstar, Shiro?” 

Shiro laughed, shaking his head. “How about breakfast first, and then we’ll see?”

Lance pouted. “You’ve never denied me morning sex before.”

“First night in your house with your parents downstairs, versus our own room on _my_ ship.”

Lance sighed, pouting harder. “Fine.” He said, rolling off of Shiro and out of bed, letting the covers fall away from him as he got up, stretching and glancing back at Shiro, corners of his lips curling in an I-told-you-so manner as he sashayed over to his dresser to get some clothes out.

Shiro put a hand behind his head, watching him with an amused smile, watching him as he dressed, before getting up himself to put some clothes on. 

Lance came back over to him when he was done, pouting up at him and Shiro smiled, leaning down to kiss it right off of his lips. 

“Come on, let me make a good impression on your family, please?”

Lance whined, but a smile spread on his face nonetheless. “Mm, fine. I suppose if I must.” He teased, lacing their fingers together and moving to unlock the door, keeping their hands interlocked as they walked down into the kitchen.

“Morning boys.” Lance’s mother said with a smile, turning around from where she was at the stove. “We have eggs, toast, or cereal.”

“I can make it.” Lance said with a smile, shooing her away from the stove and looking to Shiro to question what he wanted. 

“Um, eggs would be great.” He said softly, biting his lip and Lance nodded, setting about making them. 

Lance served them up a few minutes later, sitting next to him at the table and gently nudging his leg with his foot. Shiro gave him a smile, nudging him back as they dug in.

“Mm, I’m going to go and have a shower.” Lance said when they were finished, stretching. 

“Lance, be polite and let Shiro use it first.” Rosa said with a raised eyebrow and Lance blinked at her for a few moments before nodding.

“Right.” He said, turning to Shiro with an expression that told him that Lance hadn’t been expecting seperate showers. “You go and um, shower then.”

Shiro laughed softly at how put out Lance looked, nodding, Lance taking his plate from him before Shiro could do anything and ushering him to the stairs. 

Shiro made his way upstairs, heading into the bathroom, locking the door behind him and blowing out a breath. 

He gave a soft contented sigh as he got under the flow of hot water, smiling softly at the memory of Lance’s expression when he was reminded that they wouldn’t be showering together. 

He didn’t take too long in the shower, enjoying the warmth and washing himself thoroughly, before switching off the water and wrapping a towel around his waist, unlocking the door and stepping out, Veronica stopping in her tracks, looking to him with wide surprised eyes that quickly tracked over his body and then back to his face.

“Hi.” He said with a quick smile, blinking at her.

“Hi.” She replied, and they looked at each other for another moment, before Shiro made to move towards Lance’s room. “Captain-”

“You don’t… have to keep calling me that.” Shiro said, vaguely aware that this conversation could probably have waited until he was significantly less naked. 

“Right. Shiro. Um- you and Lance-” 

Shiro tilted his head, a quick flash of panic running through him that she’d heard them last night. 

“You’re… good now?”

Shiro nodded. 

“I don’t know everything that happened, but… Lance missed you a lot, okay? So, I’m glad that you’re here.”

Shiro smiled, nodding. “Me too. I think everything’s going to work itself out.”

“I’m glad.” She said and then checked herself. “I’ll uh- let you get dressed.”

“Thanks.” He said with a small chuckle, heading into Lance’s room to put some clothes on. 

He quickly dried off and dressed, hearing the water turn on again and wondering who had gone in now, and if it was Lance. 

He head back downstairs when he done anyway, not seeing Lance anywhere which told him that it _had_ been Lance. He went into the living room where the twins were already rushing about. 

“Shiro- Shiro-” Nadia said, rushing over to him and grabbing onto his arm, before her brother prodded her in the side. “Did you uh, did you sleep well?”

Shiro gave a soft laugh and nodded. “I did, very well, thank you. How did you both sleep?”

“Good.” She said with a shy smile, biting her lip. “Will you come and play with us outside? Daddy’s upstairs getting ready.”

“Uh…” Shiro said, glancing around, as if Lance might appear. “Sure.” He agreed, with a nod. “Sounds fun, what do you want to play?”

She thought for a moment, before quickly tapping him. “Tag, you’re it.” She said, before grabbing onto Sylvio’s wrist and rushing to the backdoor, quickly running outside.

Shiro laughed and followed them out, chasing after them, making sure to give them a good head start. He eventually ‘caught up’ and tagged Sylvio, who quickly tagged Nadia and the cycle began again. 

Shiro wasn’t sure how long they played for, but he hadn’t done something like this in a _years_ and he was surprised at how much fun he was having. When he looked up, Lance was leaning in the doorway, arms folded over his chest and a fond smile on his face. 

“Go and tag Uncle Lance.” Shiro whispered to Sylvio.

He nodded and quickly hurtled across the grass over to Lance, slapping his thigh and shouting “tag!”

Lance yelped, breaking into a run after him as he ran away, heading for Nadia and tagging her. 

They carried on the game for a little while with Lance having joined in, and after a few minutes Luis joined in, too, and they were all rushing around and tagging each other. 

Lance was heading straight for Shiro, who quickly started running away, though caught his foot on something on the ground, stumbling, causing Lance to crash right into him and send them both flying onto the ground. 

“Hi.” Lance breathed with a soft giggle from where he’d landed on top of Shiro.

“Hi.” Shiro breathed back. 

“You’re it.” He said, pressing his lips quickly to Shiro’s, who instinctively chased them when he pulled away. 

Lance kissed him back, and Shiro promptly forgot about everything around them going on, just focused on the press of Lance’s lips against his own. 

“Ahem.” Nadia said as she poked Lance in the shoulder. “You can’t tag people with your lips, Uncle Lance.” She said, raising her eyebrow and Sylvio shrieked with laughter.

Shiro felt himself flush, but Lance only laughed, rolling off of Shiro and onto the grass next to him. 

“I think… we might need to take a break.” Lance said and the twins pouted down at him. “You two should be going to ask Grandma if there’s anything you can do to help with lunch.” 

Sylvio groaned. “But that’s no funnnnn.”

“Well, it’s not fun for her either, is it?” He said, sitting up and giving him a look. 

“Uncle Lance is right.” Luis said, walking over to them. “Come on, we can play again later.” 

They reluctantly followed Luis inside, and Lance sighed, rolling onto his side to look at Shiro. 

“Hey.” He said, reaching out to poke him. 

“Hey.” Shiro said back, rolling to face Lance in turn. 

Lance looked at him for a few moments, before looking up at the sky. “It’s nice, isn’t it?”

“What is?” Shiro asked, following his gaze.

“The clouds. You can look at the stars and think we were up there, we saw those. But there were never any clouds, never any sunsets.” 

Shiro hummed in agreement. “Yeah. There are things that I always miss about space when we’re on Earth, but there are things about Earth that I’ll always miss when we’re in space.”

Lance nodded. “Does Voltron ever feel like a dream, to you?” He asked, looking back at him. 

“Sometimes.” Shiro said thoughtfully. “Sometimes it’s hard to picture it as something that happened, not something we just… dreamt up. But then there are things that couldn’t possibly not be real about it.”

“Like what?” Lance asked with a soft laugh. “The fact that you beat a ton of aliens at arm wrestling?”

Shiro chuckled. “That, yes.” He said, shaking his head. “I still wonder if I dreamt that up, sometimes. I mean… everything we went through that made us who we are, with the people we went through it with. I found you, didn’t I?”

“That’s sappy.” Lance said, rolling his eyes. 

“Maybe. But it’s true.”

“Technically, you didn’t even notice me until you saw me getting fucked by an alien.” He countered. 

“ _Technically_ , I’ve always loved you. I just now… know what _kind_ of love that is.” Shiro countered.

“You make it hard to be insecure, sometimes.” Lance pouted.

“I think that’s the point.” Shiro said with a soft smile, leaning in to kiss his nose. “I don’t ever want you to feel insecure, or to doubt the way I feel about you.”

Lance sighed, looking at him for a few moments, and then gently pressing their lips together. Shiro kissed him softly back, cupping his face and pulling him closer, until they were lying on the grass, pressed flush together and joined at the lips. 

Shiro wasn’t sure how long they kissed for, just that he’d managed to completely lose himself in it- _in Lance_ \- and that the next thing either of them were aware of other than the movement of their lips together was Luis calling them from the back door, telling them to stop making out and come to lunch. 

The rest of the day went by slowly, easily, and Shiro hadn’t felt this sort of easy contentment for a while, now. Being a part of Lance’s family was so… easy, so _nice_. He half felt like he never wanted to leave. Just wanted to stay in this little bubble of comfort, warmth and love forever. 

He and Lance stayed up past dinner, everyone having dispersed and the twins having been put to bed. 

Shiro and Lance were in the living room, sat together on the sofa, just quietly talking about nothing in particular. Shiro’s arm was around Lance’s shoulders, and Lance had his hand resting on Shiro’s thigh. 

Shiro wasn’t sure at what point the conversation had trailed off, but he knew that Lance had just looked so pretty in the glow of the evening light, and there was no world in which he wasn’t about to kiss him, and so he did.

They’d been like that for a few minutes now; three, fifteen, Shiro didn’t know. Lance was pressed close to him, arm looped around his neck and they were kissing, not knowing where anyone else in the house was, or if they had tried to come into the living room and changed their mind, just entirely caught up in each other. 

Lance finally broke the kiss, and rested their foreheads together, and neither of them said anything for a few breathless moments. 

“Come on, I want to show you something.” He said, taking Shiro’s hand and standing up. 

He lead him to the door and they put their shoes on, before leading Shiro out of it and down the path. 

They walked for maybe seven or eight minutes before Lance took them down a path, the sun already beginning to set, and Shiro knew that they’d be walking back in the dark. 

They didn’t stop until they had arrived at the entrance of a cove, sand beneath their feet and the ocean stretching out in front of them. 

“What we were saying about sunsets, earlier.” He said, looking out over the water, where the sun hung low in the sky, just about ready to disappear. “This was my favourite place to come when I was growing up. I used to call it my cove, because no one else really came here that often. It’s hidden away from the main beach, so the tourists don’t usually find it. It’s the best place to watch the sunset from.”

“It’s beautiful.” Shiro said, watching the sun as it sank lower over the horizon, and how it glimmered on the water, giving it an orangey glow. 

“I’ve never brought anyone here before.” Lance said softly. “I always said when I was little that this was my place, and that I’d never let anyone come. That I’d never bring anyone here, never share this.” He said, voice soft over the waves of the ocean, lapping onto the shore. 

Shiro tore his eyes away from the view, locking them on Lance. He was looking at him with an expression that he never had before. It was… somehow a mixture of such love, such intense love, and such fear and exhilaration all at once. 

“I’m in love with you.” Lance breathed and Shiro couldn’t stop the smile before it broke out over his face. 

Shiro didn’t know what to say- didn’t know what he _could_ say to something that meant so much, so instead he pulled Lance in for a fierce kiss, holding him close and kissing him. 

Lance looped his arms around Shiro’s neck, kissing him back with just as much need and passion, kissing him until they were both breathless and the sky around them was dark. 

“And there are the stars.” Shiro breathed, glancing out at the way they glimmered across the ocean surface, and Lance followed his gaze, resting the sides of their heads together. 

“And yet somehow, I found you.” Lance said quietly, and Shiro gave a gentle laugh. 

“I thought that was too much?” He said, looking back at him and Lance kissed him again. 

“I thought saying that I’m so desperately in love with you outloud would be too much, but here we are anyway.”

“Lance…” Shiro said, cupping his face. 

“I’m not scared anymore.” Lance said. 

“No?” Shiro asked, biting his lip with a smile.

“Maybe a little.” Lance admitted.

“That’s okay. I am, too.”

“You are?” Lance asked and Shiro rested their foreheads together. 

“Pretty damn terrified. But that’s okay, because we can be in too deep together.”

“Okay. In too deep together.” Lance agreed, kissing his lips. “When are you going back?” 

“You know when.” Shiro said softly, a small frown etching onto his forehead. 

“Humour me.”

“Five days.”

“Take me with you.”

“You’d want to come?” Shiro asked softly, tilting his head. 

“I don’t want to be away from you again.” Lance said and Shiro nodded. 

“Of course.” Shiro said softly. “Of course you can come. I could find something for you to do, maybe.”

“Yeah?” Lance asked with a smile.

“Yeah.” Shiro agreed. “You might not be so bored.”

“Okay.” Lance smiled, biting his lip. “And for the record, I was never bored.”

Shiro laughed softly, holding Lance close. “What are you going to tell your family?”

“Not to miss me too much.” Lance said with a soft laugh. “And not to worry, because I have my big strong boyfriend to keep me safe.”

Shiro felt his heart jump in his chest. “Boyfriend?” He asked and Lance bit his lip. 

“If you want.” 

“I really, really want.” Shiro said and Lance smiled.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” Shiro said, brushing their noses together and kissing him. “I love you.” He said. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too.” Lance murmured back, kissing him again. “We should get back.” Lance said with a soft sigh, looking out over the ocean and then back at Shiro. 

Shiro nodded. “Okay.” He said, lacing their fingers together and bringing Lance’s hand to his lips. 

Lance smiled softly, swinging their hands between them as they made the walk back home, sliding the lock across on his bedroom door as he closed it behind them. 

“I’m sorry.” Lance murmured, and Shiro gave him a soft smile, reaching out to tucking his hair behind his ear. 

“I don’t ever want to hear you say that you’re sorry again.” He murmured back, bringing their lips together, resting his hands on Lance’s hips and dipping them under the hem of his shirt, roaming over his skin. 

Lance made a soft noise, shivering under his touch, giving a gentle moan into Shiro’s mouth and parting his lips as Shiro slipped his tongue in. 

There was no hurry, no need, no desperation, just lips softly moving together, tongues exploring each other’s mouths, and hands gently roaming over skin. 

Lance gently slid his arms around Shiro’s shoulders as they kissed, letting Shiro trace his fingertips up and down his sides and over his back. 

Eventually Shiro pulled back, carefully pulling Lance’s shirt up and over his head, dropping it onto the floor beside him, no longer his concern as he got his hands back on Lance’s body. Lance gave a weak protest, doing the same with Shiro’s shirt, before closing the distance once more. 

It was like time had slowed right down, like they could spend the rest of eternity just like this, wrapped up in each other. Lance shuddered as Shiro traced patterns on his skin, fingertips wandering with no path mapped out, wherever they pleased, tracing each faint scar and each freckle that decorated his skin. 

Shiro would have been contented to just stay right there, standing in the middle of Lance’s room, but Lance eventually moved them to the bed, pulling Shiro down on top of him, never breaking their lips apart. 

Lance gave a gentle moan as Shiro settled between his legs, leaning over him and sucking gently on his tongue, Lance burying his hands into Shiro’s hair. 

Shiro pulled back, pressing a succession of tender kisses to Lance’s lips, Lance leaning into each, chasing him when he pulled back, stroking his fingertips over Shiro’s scalp. He tipped his head as Shiro began to press kisses along his jaw, giving a gentle nip to his ear lobe and listening to Lance’s intake of breath. 

He pressed light kisses over Lance’s neck, brushes of his lips as light as a feather across his skin, down the side of his throat and in the curve of his neck, over his adams apple and up to under his chin. 

Lance gasped softly as Shiro sucked at the skin in the curve of his neck, fingertips pressing against his scalp as Shiro sucked, gently rolling the skin between his teeth until the skin bruised. He wanted to leave Lance covered in his marks, wanted to mark him everywhere. 

He moved to his collar bones next, lightly nipping at them, before biting and sucking and eliciting the prettiest of breathy little gasps from Lance as he wrapped his legs around Shiro’s waist. 

Shiro slid his hands over Lance’s sides as he continued kissing down, peppering them over his chest. He pressed a kiss to each of his nipples in turn, before gently lapping his tongue over one of them, humming as it hardened, and he flicked his tongue out across the bud, back and forth a few times, listening to Lance’s sharp intake of breath and the way his fingers curled in his hair. 

He took the bud into his mouth, gently suckling at it, Lance blowing out a shaky breath, cradling Shiro’s head and stroking his hair, Shiro glancing up at him to meet his gaze. He looked gorgeous in the dim light, cheeks flushed and eyes lidded, lip bitten as he looked down at him. 

“You’re beautiful.” Shiro murmured, pressing a few more kisses to his nipple before moving to the other one, giving it the same attention; kissing and swirling his tongue around the bud, flicking across it before gently suckling at it, bringing his hand up to gently roll the first between his fingertips. 

Lance breathed a soft whine at that, fingertips pressing against his scalp a little more firmly. Shiro gave a soft hum, pulling away and slowly peppering his chest with kisses. He took the sensitive skin by his nipple between his teeth, gently nipping at it, sucking at the skin, determined to leave a mark. 

Lance gave the tiniest of breathless moans, head tipping back a little as Shiro kept rolling his nipples between his fingers, working on a mark on the delicate skin near by, before moving to leave another. 

Lance arched his back a little, pressing his chest against Shiro’s lips with a soft moan, and Shiro pulled back to look at the marks he’d made, before looking up to meet Lance’s eyes. Lance tightened his grip in his hair and gently guided him back up to his lips, kissing him again and again and again until Shiro couldn’t decide how long they’d spent kissing, only knowing that he’d half forgotten how to breathe and needed to pull back for a breath. 

Shiro kissed back down his neck and chest, gently nipping at each of the marks he’d decorated his skin with, before continuing down his abdomen in a trail of kisses to the waistband of his jeans. He took his time meticulously kissing every inch of the skin on his stomach, before biting into the flesh of it and sucking. 

He was determined to cover Lance with as many hickeys as he could; they were called love bites for a reason, and he set about sucking them into his stomach and over his sides. 

Lance squirmed a little as Shiro brushed his lips over his ticklish spots, still brushing his fingers through Shiro’s hair and watching him with a smile that was full of love and arousal. 

Once he was satisfied, he moved to his hips, unbuttoning Lance’s pants and pulling them down his thighs as Lance lifted his hips for Shiro to rid him the of the rest of his clothing. Now that Lance was fully nude, Shiro moved back to his hips, teeth grazing and catching the skin between his teeth as he smoothed his hands over Lance’s sides and down his thighs. 

He kissed down the v in his skin, gently biting at the sensitive skin around his cock, Lance giving a soft gasp through his teeth. Shiro glanced up at him, Lance looking at him with more lust in his eyes than ever, but instead of giving into it, Shiro moved down to his thighs, spreading them apart with his hands and nuzzling his nose against his skin. 

He peppered the insides of them with kisses, again, sucking more marks into the skin and he could tell that Lance was getting impatient, arousal getting the better of him as he tugged on Shiro’s hair and tried to direct him where he needed the attention most. 

Shiro gave a glance to his cock where it was laying hard against his stomach, but he didn’t want to give in just yet, spending a little more time on his thighs before finally giving Lance what he wanted. 

He huffed out an amused breath at Lance’s soft relieved moan as he wrapped his hand around the base of his cock, directing the tip to his lips and resting it against them. 

He looked up at him, pressing a succession of small kisses to the tip, before swirling his tongue around it, Lance’s fingers tightening in his hair as he did so. He hummed and took Lance’s cock into his mouth, little by little, sucking around his shaft as he went until Lance’s cock was fully seated inside of his mouth, tip pressing against the back of his throat in a very uncomfortable way, but the blissed look on Lance’s face made it worth it. 

He pulled slowly off of him, before taking him back in, deepthroating him again and slowly picking up the pace until he was bobbing his head over his cock at a steady pace. 

Shiro pulled off completely when Lance started whimpering a little louder, tugging on his hair and eyes screwed shut, opening them and looking down at him confusedly. 

“S-Shiro-” He said, voice rough from his gasps and moans, but Shiro didn’t answer him, dipping down to take one of his balls into his mouth instead, sucking on it and receiving a broken moan in response. 

He took his time rolling it in his mouth, Lance giving a soft pleasured hiss as Shiro’s teeth caught on the delicate skin, before he released it from his mouth, pressing kisses to the base of his cock and gently licking over the skin. 

He hummed, taking his other into his mouth in turn and giving it the same attention, wrapping his hand around Lance’s cock and stroking his hand over it ever so slowly, not enough to get him off, just enough to tease him with the pleasure. 

On a normal night he wouldn’t have minded making Lance cum again and again, but tonight he wanted it to last. Wanted to work him up, shower him with love until he was crying from the pleasure and desperate for release.

Releasing it with a wet pop, Shiro moved away from his balls, kissing and licking down his perineum to his entrance. Lance gave a shaky moan, massaging his scalp with his fingers encouragingly as Shiro lapped his tongue over his hole. 

Lance spread his legs wider, and Shiro gave a soft hum, catching his teeth on his rim and listening to Lance’s pleasured hiss, tugging slightly on his hair. Shiro nibbled at it, sucking a little before pressing his tongue into him. 

Lance whined, gently rocking his hips, pushing them upwards so it would be easier for Shiro and Shiro stroked his thighs in thanks, gently fucking him with his tongue. He kept at it for a few minutes, but again, pulled back when Lance started getting too into it, going back to kissing his thighs and glancing up at him at Lance’s frustrated groan. 

“Shiro…” He whined softly. 

“I’ll give you everything you need, baby.” Shiro murmured, pressing a line of deliberate kisses down the inside of his thigh to his knee. 

He kissed back up along the bone of his pelvis to his hip, looking up at him. 

“I want-” Lance said, huffing a frustrated breath.

“What, angel?” Shiro asked.

“Your clothes off.” He said though a small whine, moving to sit up. 

Shiro gave a soft chuckle, sitting up with him and letting Lance crawl over him, quickly unbuttoning his pants and pulling them down, giving another frustrated whine when he couldn’t get them off properly, so Shiro helped him with it, dropping them off of the edge of the bed to join the rest of their clothes on the floor. 

“I wanna touch you.” Lance murmured, climbing into Shiro’s lap and pressing soft kisses along his jaw. 

“I’m not stopping you.” Shiro breathed as Lance stroked his hands over his skin, soft and lingering touches as he kissed to his lips, gently taking his lower lip between his teeth and dragging it as he slid his hands around to rest on Shiro’s pecs, giving a soft squeeze. 

He didn’t linger on them long, however, pulling away from Shiro’s lips and kissing down his throat, peppering kisses over Shiro’s skin in what seemed to be an organised pattern. It took Shiro longer than he would have liked to admit to realise what he was doing, Lance pressing kiss after kiss after kiss along his skin. 

He looked down to where Lance was kissing over his chest and his shoulders, pressing a delicate and deliberate kiss to each little scar on his skin that he could see, brushing his lips across in a series of kisses over the bigger ones. 

Shiro’s breath caught, swallowing thickly and stroking his fingers through Lance’s hair, trying to focus on the feeling of Lance’s lips on his skin instead of what he was actually doing; he really didn’t want to get any more emotional than he was already feeling and crying while he was trying to have an intimate moment with Lance, didn’t seem like the best idea. 

Lance slid his hands all over Shiro’s skin, over his shoulders, his sides and his back, bringing them back around to squeeze at his chest. 

A small whining noise caught in Shiro’s throat, and Lance hummed, brushing his thumbs over his nipples and gently pinching them between his fingers as they hardened beneath his touch.

Shiro gasped softly and Lance pinched a little harder, eliciting a soft broken moan from Shiro before he let them go, gently flicking the pads of his thumbs over them soothingly. 

Up until this point, Shiro had been to preoccupied with kissing absolutely every inch of Lance’s body and eliciting little breathless noises from him to be thinking with his cock too much, but already, it was perking up with interest at the stimulation. 

Lance hummed, dipping down to press a kiss to one, similarly to how Shiro had, swirling his tongue around the bud before taking it into his mouth. Except, instead of sucking immediately, as Shiro had, Lance let his teeth graze over it, before gently nibbling. Shiro gasped at the sensitivity, winding his hands into Lance’s hair and breathing a soft moan, feeling his cock jump with each graze of Lance’s teeth. 

Lance brought his other hand up to gently pinch and tug at his other nipple, and Shiro’s breathing was shaky as he curled his fingers in Lance’s hair, letting his head tip back and eyes fall closed. 

Shiro whined, catching his lip between his teeth and biting on it as Lance worked him up, fingers sliding over his skin, feeling like they were burning him with each touch. 

Shiro felt Lance breathe a soft laugh against him, brows furrowing in confusion as he looked down at him. 

“Hi there.” Lance cooed, reaching down to lightly pet the head of Shiro’s cock, now straining hard against his abdomen. 

“Are you really-?” Shiro asked, but Lance brought his other hand up to press a finger to Shiro’s lips. 

“Did you like that?” He asked with a soft giggle, rubbing his finger under the head of his cock as if tickling a puppy under its chin. 

Shiro swallowed, watching Lance as his cock twitched under his touch. 

“Oh, you _did_.” He said knowledgeably, nodding and continuing to gently rub the tip of his fingertip back and forth across the head of his cock, just gently petting it. 

Shiro didn’t know whether to find it cute or arousing, but his cock was definitely responding to it, twitching under Lance’s touch, desperate for him to take it in hand and give him some proper stimulation. 

“You have such a gorgeous cock.” Lance murmured as he stroked it, shifting off of Shiro’s lap and shuffling down the bed a little so that he could press a kiss to the tip of his cock. “You’re so sensitive today.” He cooed as Shiro’s cock jumped a little. 

Shiro didn’t say anything in response, knowing it was true, and instead lacing his fingers through Lance’s hair, holding it off of his face as he pressed gentle kisses down his shaft, gently stroking his hand over it as he went.

Shiro gave a soft hiss, watching as Lance gently lapped his tongue out over the skin at the base of his cock, pressing a few wet kisses to his balls, before making his way back up his shaft with little kitten licks until he got back to the head. 

“So gorgeous.” He repeated, nuzzling his nose against the side of his cock. “Such a pretty cock, baby, best cock I’ve ever had.”

Shiro scoffed at that and Lance lightly slapped across his cock, Shiro gasping softly at the sting. 

“Did you like that?” Lance asked curiously, tilting his head. 

Shiro didn’t say anything, just blushed, and Lance laughed. 

“You don’t get to rank every cock I’ve taken, Shiro. Because it’s a lot.” He murmured, mouthing over his shaft. “But yours is my favourite. It’s always been my favourite ever since I first saw it, first had it in my mouth. You were so worked up that day, baby, hadn’t been touched for so long.” 

Shiro swallowed, the sweet tone of Lance’s voice doing things to him as he pressed tender loving kisses over his cock and gently stroked it. 

“Not now, though; you’re a real pro.” He said, looking up at him with a grin. “But I mean it, hm? I _really_ love your cock. I’d be content to just sit here and suck it all day, for hours and hours.”

Shiro swallowed again, still gently stroking though Lance’s hair as he tried not to think about a scenario in which that would be possible. 

“Baby…” Shiro breathed as Lance kissed his cock, swirling his tongue around the head and planting kiss after kiss over the skin. 

“Make love to me.” Lance murmured, looking up at him and Shiro swallowed, biting his lip with a soft smile. 

“Yeah?” He asked softly, cupping Lance’s face. 

“Please.” He said, smiling softly up at him and dropping another kiss to the tip of his cock. 

Shiro leaned down to scoop Lance back up into his lap, before laying him down on the bed, Lance’s thighs falling easily apart, cock now laying softened against his hip bone as he looked up at him. 

“You’re so beautiful.” Shiro breathed as he settled himself between Lance’s legs. 

Lance flushed, biting his lip and Shiro gently traced his fingertips over Lance’s skin. There was no rush and no urgency, just gently dancing over him, fingertips leaving kisses as they went. 

Lance reached out to take Shiro’s hands, lacing their fingers together and pulling him down over his body and against his lips. Neither of them were in a rush to get Shiro inside of him like they usually were, there was no begging, no asking or whining, just soft gentle kisses, breathing each other in. 

They gently ground against one another, Lance’s cock slowly hardening back up against Shiro’s, and Lance wrapped his legs around Shiro’s waist. 

Without breaking the kiss, Shiro fumbled with Lance’s bedside drawer for the lube, uncapping it and slipping his hand between them to carefully press a finger into Lance. 

It slid in easily, and Lance’s breath hitched, Shiro swallowing his soft moan as he began to thrust it into him, quickly adding a second and working on stretching him out. 

He teased his prostate, but only enough to have Lance panting into his mouth, more just resting against him breathlessly than kissing him, and Shiro was more than happy to stay like that, pressing kisses to his cheeks under his eyes as he gasped, face screwing up as he bit his lip. 

It didn’t take too long to stretch him out, a little longer than usual, though, as it had been a few weeks now, but Shiro soon had three fingers working him open, spreading inside of him.

Lance was rocking his hips, brushing his cock against Shiro’s abdomen and against his own, giving soft little whimpers with each touch. 

“Shiro-” Lance breathed, cupping the back of his head and bringing him back to his lips. “Take me.” 

Shiro breathed a soft moan back against him in response, pulling his fingers out of him and spreading a little lube onto his cock, before positioning himself at Lance’s entrance. 

Lance laced their fingers together, pressing a kiss to the back of Shiro’s hand before letting their interlocked hands fall next to them on the bed, using his other hand to stroke Shiro’s hair and keep him close, gently kissing at his lips. 

Finally, Shiro eased into him with such a practiced ease and and familiarity, slipping in all at once, reaching deep inside of him. They moaned together, breathing in each other’s moans, hands held tightly, and Shiro stayed like that for a few moments, just basking in the feel of it all, before beginning to pull out. 

He thrust back in, slowly and gently, rocking his hips, Lance breathing soft whimpers into his mouth, other hand still gently stroking at the nape of his neck, before stroking down his back and resting at his shoulder blade, clutching Shiro close to him as he wrapped his legs around his waist, hooking one ankle over the other. 

It was like they both existed in a timeless reality, Shiro unsure of how long they’d been like that for, just aware of the slide of his cock into Lance’s tight heat, how completely wrapped up and lost they were in each other, how he just wanted to stay like this buried in Lance for the rest of his life, holding him close in his arms and making love to him. 

Neither of them spoke, just trying to keep themselves quiet, only vaguely aware of the outside world and that they should probably be being quiet; but it wasn’t a situation that called for loudness, anyway. Each touch, each thrust, was so soft and slow and deep and gentle, and it was the most intimate thing that Shiro had ever experienced in his life. He knew for a fact that it was Lance’s, too. 

God, he was so in love, he was so so in love with this man, kissing at his lips and over his jaw, Lance holding his hand tightly, other limbs wrapped around him to keep him close, as if he couldn’t bear for Shiro to move even an inch away, and in all honest, neither could Shiro. 

He needed to be close like this, needed to feel Lance’s skin hot against his own, the drag of his fingertips and the warmth of his breath. The sting of his nails pressing into his back each time his cock dragged across his prostate, paired with the hitched gasp, and the little drizzling of sticky precum between their abdomens. 

It came upon them both slowly and all at once, suddenly realising just how close they were, just how _good_ this was, just how much they’d needed it. Because Lance was clenching around him and whimpering, cock steadily leaking between them and god, _god_ Shiro was about to cum, too. 

He barely even had time to warn Lance, catching him completely unawares, and suddenly he was groaning into Lance’s mouth, squeezing his hand and thrusting deeply into him as he spilled inside of him. 

Lance’s gasp was high and needy, trailing off into a breathless moan, clenching around him as he too, came, spilling between them and painting both of their abdomens with his cum. They rocked against each other as they rode it out, coming to a slow stop, Shiro all but collapsing on top of him, and Lance stroking over his back. 

They lay there panting for the longest time, before Shiro tried to roll off of him, and Lance clutched at him tighter, effectively keeping him in place. He brought his hand up to tangle into Shiro’s hair, bringing him back to his lips in a soft kiss. 

It was breathless and it was tired, but it was so full of love. They didn’t to speak, they didn’t need to say it, or anything at all, because they were both feeling it so deeply and so fully and completely. 

They kissed gently like that for a few minutes, tired and messy, and eventually Lance did let Shiro roll off of him and onto the bed beside him.

Lance curled against his chest, tracing gentle patterns onto his skin with his fingertips, eyes drooping. 

“We should clean up.” Shiro murmured and Lance’s forehead pinched in discomfort at the thought and he shook his head. “Yes, baby. You’ve never gone to sleep still dirty and you’re not about to start now.” He murmured, lips pressed against his temple. 

Lance made a small noise of protest, pouting and shaking his head. Shiro sat up, scooping Lance up into his arms and kissing his nose, getting up off of the bed and standing on shaky legs. 

He carried him to the door, opening it and poking his head out, just as Lance had done the previous night. After determining that the coast was clear, he darted out and into the bathroom, closing the door behind them, trying to ignore how Lance had turned to hide his face in his chest and was still making small whining noises in protest. 

“You’ll thank me tomorrow, I promise.” Shiro said and Lance huffed, looking up at him. 

“Fine.” He relented as Shiro put him down, raising an accusatory eyebrow as he caught sight of himself in the mirror. 

“What?” Shiro asked, moving to stand behind him and wrap his arms around his waist, pressing a few kisses in the dip of Lance’s neck. 

“What? Really?” Lance snorted and Shiro shrugged.

“They’re called love bites for a reason, you know.” He said and Lance gave a light laugh, shaking his head. 

“Okay, okay, run the bath, will you?”

“Mmm.” Shiro said, turning on the taps and motioning for Lance to come over. 

He sighed and got into the bath, kneeling in a similar position to how they had been yesterday.

Shiro kissed his temple, and started to gently clean him up, Lance leaning against him and resting his head on his shoulder. Once they were finished Shiro put the plug into the bath and started letting the water fill up around them. He shifted, sitting down and pulling Lance into his lap. 

Lance leant back against him with a soft contented sigh, a small smile on his lips and Shiro pressed a kiss to his hair. Neither of them moved until the water was ready, Shiro leaning forward to switch the tap off and then sitting back again, wrapping his arms around Lance’s waist. 

“Are you okay?” Shiro asked softly. “You’re not normally this tired.” He said, not aware that they’d done anything particularly taxing. 

Lance nodded. “It’s just… been a long few days.” He said. “I think my head is more tired than my body.”

Shiro hummed, nodding. “I can understand that.” He said. 

“But to answer your question.” Lance said softly, taking Shiro’s hand and lacing their fingers together. “Yes, I’m okay. I’m really good.” He said, looking up at him with a smile, and Shiro pressed their lips together. 

“I’m glad.” He said, smiling against his lips and Lance gave a soft contented sigh. 

“What about you, how are you feeling?” He asked, reaching up to cup his face, water warming his skin. 

“I’m feeling…” Shiro said, brows furrowing as he actually thought about it. “Like I could just… stay like this forever. Like we could just stay like this forever, and fuck anything else.”

Lance smiled and bit his lip. “Me too.” He said. “But I promise you, you’d get sick of us having to stay quiet every time _incredibly_ quickly. I know how you like to make me loud.”

Shiro felt his cheeks flush and he reluctantly nodded. “That’s true. Well, we’ll be back with a room to ourselves soon enough, so I’m just going to enjoy being here with your family for the time we’ve got left.”

“You like them?” Lance asked with a smile and Shiro scoffed. 

“Lance.” He said, shaking his head. “They’re wonderful, and I can’t wait to meet the rest of them. I mean, I knew they would be; they’re related to you.”

Lance rolled his eyes with a fond smile. “I’m sure there are many people who’d disagree with you there.”

 

“Like who?” Shiro asked, frowning.

“Mmmm, like Keith, like-” 

“I don’t know what that’s supposed to mean, but Keith _loves_ you-”

“Baby, I’m teasing.” Lance said softly, kissing his jaw and then twisting back to lay against his chest. “I’m just teasing. I’m glad you like them; I know they love you. Nadia and Sylvio especially.”

“They’re good kids.” Shiro smiled. “Should I ask about their mother, or?”

Lance waved him off. “Oh, that’s all fine, don’t worry, she’s coming down in a few days but I think we _just_ miss her. Next time then, hm? You can meet Rachel and Marco, too.”

Shiro smiled at that and nodded. “I look forward to it.” 

He knew that they’d confessed their feelings for each other. That they were, well, _in love_ with each other. But somehow, hearing Lance talk about the future like that, like this wasn’t something temporary anymore, like this was something that he wanted to keep around for a very long time. It was… well, it was everything. 

“What are you thinking about?” Lance asked and Shiro could hear the smile in his voice. 

“Hm?”

“Your heart just sped up, what are you thinking about?”

Shiro felt his cheeks flush hard at that. “I just… the future, I guess. You and me. I just… I spent so long thinking- _knowing_ that this was temporary and that I’d lose you and that you’d be gone and I’d never get to have you again. I guess just… hearing you talk about the future like it’s actually happening, like you’ll still- want me, I guess, after all that time passes, it’s… nice.”

Lance twisted in his arms to look at him, properly twisting this time so that he was straddling his lap, and he looped his arms around his neck, gently stroking at the nape of his neck. 

“My love, the future _is_ actually happening. And I’m still going to want you when we get back- six months, ten months, a year, five. I’m going to want you for the rest of my life. You’re… _it_ for me, okay? I’m never going to let you go.”

“You really believe that?” Shiro asked, a small smile on his face despite himself.

“I really do.” He said, pressing a soft kiss to his lips. “Don’t you feel the same for me?”

“Of course I do, but-”

Lance cut him off with another kiss. “No buts, my darling. Let yourself be loved, let yourself be happy without worrying about it, okay? I made the mistake of hurting you once and I am _never_ going to do it again. Not ever.”

Impossibly, Shiro wasn’t sure that he’d ever felt more in love than at that moment. 

“I love you.” He murmured, and it didn’t feel like _enough_ , not enough to show Lance the sheer overwhelming intensity of it, but he supposed, that it would have to do, for now.

Lance smiled softly and kissed him again in lieu of replying and that was okay; Shiro didn’t need to hear it back because he _knew_ he knew how much Lance was feeling it and how deeply he ran, and a small part of him somewhere was trying to remind him to feel anxious that he hadn’t said it back, but it was quickly extinguished as they kissed. 

Lance was in love with him. Lance was really _really_ in love with him. 

Shiro wasn’t sure how long they sat in the bath like that for, just holding each other and kissing, but at some point the water ran cold and they had to get out. 

Wrapped in towels, they went back into Lance’s room, closing the door behind them and finishing drying off, before falling back into bed. 

Lance had woken up a bit now, crawling in next to him and against his chest, similarly to before and tracing his fingertips over his skin, looking up at him, glossy eyes illuminated in the moonlight. 

“You’re beautiful.” He said, and it took him a moment to realise that those words had come out of Lance’s mouth and not his own. 

“You’re beautiful.” Shiro countered, and Lance brought their lips together. 

It was soft and gentle, and reminiscent of earlier with no intent and no need behind it. Just love. 

Lance settled down in his arms after that, tucking his head under Shiro’s chin and Shiro wrapped his arms around him, a small smile on his face as his eyes fell closed.

 

***

 

The rest of the week went by in a flash, but Shiro found that he didn’t mind. He didn’t feel like he was on borrowed time, anymore. Yes, being at the McClain house had been… well, it had been wonderful, but just because they were leaving now, didn’t mean they were never coming back.

Because… in a few months, when the Atlas came back to Earth, Lance and Veronica would be going home. And Shiro? Well, Shiro would be going with them. 

Shiro smiled to himself, biting his lip to try and hold it back as he watched everyone loading the Atlas up, ready for launching. 

Everyone was busy, and Shiro and Lance were no exception. His family were milling about, trying to be useful in some way, Luis trying to keep ahold of Nadia and Sylvio as they raced around, pretending to be little rocket ships. 

Shiro had already loaded their bags into their room, and was finishing up with the rest of the preparations. 

It was chaotic, but it always was, and that was something that Shiro loved about it. It was somehow like… packing to go on a very long sleepover with your friends. And from the amount of time that everyone on the Atlas had spent together over the years, they were. And it was fun. 

Shiro knew that people would be gathering to watch the launch, walking down the hall to go and assess how many people were there already, and maybe give them a wave. It always astounded him how many people always came, even if it was the exact same thing that happened every time, but then he remembered being young, and wanting to be a pilot, and watching launches on the television and desperately wishing that he could have been there to watch. 

If he could have, then he would have gone to every one. So, he supposed, if he could inspire someone like that, then it was worth it. 

He went outside, giving a small wave and a smile to the people who were gathered out there, though it wasn’t too many yet. 

Someone waving caught his eye and he smiled, walking over to him. 

“Shiro, hey.”

“Callum.” He smiled. “How are you?” 

“I’m good, I’m good.” He said. “You look better.” He said, raising an eyebrow.

“Oh- I uh, I am.” He said, biting his lip. “I am, thank you.” He said, before following Callum’s gaze behind him to where Lance was walking over to them. 

“Hey, I didn’t know where you’d run off to.” He said with a smile and Shiro smiled softly back.

“Ah, I just came out here and ran into a friend. This is Callum- and uh, this is Lance.”

Callum nodded in understanding. “It’s nice to meet you.” He said and then looked to Shiro. “I’m glad you worked things out.”

“Ah.” Shiro said, feeling his cheeks heat a little. “Me too.”

He glanced at Lance, who was looking between them, and Shiro could tell the exact moment that it clicked. 

“We should get back inside.” He said, sliding his arm protectively around Shiro’s waist. “I’m sure the Captain is needed.”

Shiro frowned. “We don’t-”

“It’s okay.” Callum said with a smile. “I just wanted to say hi and see how you were doing.”

Shiro bit his lip. “Okay, well, it was really good to see you again, Callum.”

“You too, Just-Shiro.” He quipped and Shiro gave a small laugh. “I’ll see you around. Have a safe trip.”

“Thanks.” Shiro smiled, letting Lance lead him back inside, however, instead of leading him back to where they were supposed to be going, he pulled Shiro down a corridor, and into an empty room, shoving him against the door as he closed it behind them, fisting his hands into Shiro’s shirt collar and pulling him into a fierce kiss. 

Shiro squeaked in surprise, not fully comprehending what was happening as Lance kissed him needily, teeth nipping at his lips, pressing himself against Shiro, and effectively trapping him against the wall. 

“Lance-“ Shiro said breathlessly, managing to pull away for a second, and Lance panted, not letting go of his grip on his shirt. 

“Was that him?” He asked, and Shiro blinked. 

“Are you- jealous?” He asked in surprise, Lance’s brows pinching as he pursed his lips, letting go of his shirt. 

“No.” He said sulkily.

“You are.” Shiro said with an amused smile. 

Lance huffed and folded his arms across his chest. “I didn’t know you were friendly with him.”

“Lance.” Shiro said softly with a smile. “You don’t need to be jealous.”

Lance pouted. “Not jealous.” 

Shiro wrapped his arms around Lance, holding him close to his chest. “It’s okay to be jealous, but you don’t _need_ to be.”

Lance sighed. “I know that must sound stupid to you, I mean- you get off on watching me with other people, I just… I don’t.” He said with a small frown. “Is that… really hypocritical of me? That I don’t want to think about you with anyone else? But I like that you like me with other people?”

“No, I don’t think so.” Shiro said, kissing his forehead. “It’s just a kink, Lance. It’s because… as long as I’ve thought about you like that, you’ve been with other people. And that’s what I would watch, and get off to, so… no. You don’t need to feel bad about not wanting to think about me with someone else, I don’t want to _be_ with someone else. Sex wise or otherwise.”

“Is that still… a thing, now we’re dating? Me and-?”

Shiro hummed. “I mean, I think so. As long as I can watch and I get to take care of you afterwards then… yeah, I think so.”

Lance looked up at him with a small grin. “We never did have that threesome, you know.” He said and Shiro nearly choked. 

“We what?”

“You said you wanted to have a threesome.” 

“I- think I said, that was _maybe_ something I was _interested_ in.” 

Lance hummed and waved him off. “If you don’t want to, you only needed to say so.”

“Now, I- I didn’t say that.” Shiro said carefully and Lance laughed. 

“You definitely want to have a threesome.” 

Shiro huffed. “Maybe.”

“Then we will.” Lance said with a grin, lacing their fingers together. 

“We should get back.” Shiro said, changing the subject. 

“Orrrr, you could kiss me some more.” Lance said, raising an eyebrow. 

“That’s very tempting. But we’ll have all the time for kissing later, after the launch, okay?”

Lance hummed, standing on his tiptoes and looping his arms around Shiro’s neck, anyway, ghosting their lips together. “Mmm.” He said non committaly. 

Shiro was still working on that thing of not giving into Lance’s every whim and desire, and really, he was sure that he’d get there one day. Maybe in twenty years, or fifty. But for now, he pressed their lips back together, sliding his hands around Lance’s waist and pulling him close. 

Lance made a soft noise against his lips, that Shiro couldn’t take to be anything but smugness, and he smiled against them, gently nipping at Lance’s bottom lip in retaliation. 

“You’re so easy.” Lance murmured against his lips, grinning and Shiro grinned back, nipping him again, a little harder. 

“So you just _love_ to tell me.” 

Lance giggled. “Because it’s true.”

“Mm.” Shiro said, rolling his eyes and gently prying Lance off of him and lacing their fingers together. “Come on, I’ll be in trouble if I’m missing any longer. 

“I like getting you into trouble.” Lance grinned, but didn’t protest as Shiro opened the door and they began to make their way back to everyone. 

“Oh trust me.” Shiro laughed. “ _I know_.”

Lance laughed, swinging their hands between them and kissing Shiro on the cheek. 

Things were hectic from there on out, and Shiro didn’t really get a minute to breathe until they were up in the air. They’d bid everyone goodbye and everyone had piled into the Atlas, with Shiro at the helm, and soon enough they were back up in space, back on their way. 

It was going to be a little longer this time; eight months (though probably ten) before they would get back to Earth. Shiro had checked and double checked that Lance was absolutely sure he wanted to come, because planet hopping for a few months and actually committing to being in the Atlas for almost a year were very different things. 

Lance had just laughed and kissed him, asking if Shiro was planning on breaking up with him during that time. Shiro had spluttered indignantly and told him of course not. So that was that. 

Finally, _finally_ they got off, setting the course to autopilot and letting everyone retire to their rooms. 

Neither of them had been back to their room yet, other than to drop their bags off, as Lance had wanted to stick around and watch everyone during the launch. 

As soon as the door was closed Lance was peeling his clothes off and rushing over to the bed, flopping down onto it with a happy sigh. Shiro laughed softly, doing the same and walking over to him, letting Lance reach out for him and pull him down, too. 

“I’ve missed our bed.” He murmured, gently kissing Shiro’s lips. “And our room.” 

That was right. Now, it wasn’t just Shiro’s room that Lance was staying in. It was _their_ room. 

“Me too.” Shiro agreed. 

He’d never had too many feelings about this room before, for the amount of time he’d spent in it. But now it was his haven. His safe place. It was _Lance_.

Lance dimmed the lights and Shiro laid down, Lance quickly nestling himself right against his side just where he belonged. 

The two laid there in a comfortable, tired silence for a few minutes and Shiro felt his eyes just beginning to droop as Lance looked up at him with a wicked grin. 

“Hey Shiro, let’s film a video.” He said, and Shiro laughed. 

“Let’s film a video.” He agreed as Lance climbed on top of him, giving him a tender smile and pressing their lips together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and thats a wrap, folks ;0;
> 
> god. i dont even. know what to say. when i said i would write a fic for fell, i think we both thought it was going to be about 5k max, and then suddenly... it completely spiralled and steven had to listen to me on the phone saying okay but now its 50k- and now its 60k and now- and then one day as a complete joke i said lmao might as well just go for 100k thinking that would _never_ happen, but,,, here we are
> 
> i have loads of other stuff lined up but i still feel.... what am i doing now its done ive been working non stop on it for two months and now its over
> 
> so thank you everyone for coming along for the ride its been amazing and the response has been,,, overwhelming, to be honest, getting all of your comments has made me so incredibly happy and they mean the world to me ;u;
> 
> thank you all for reading and comments are greatly appreciated <3


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